Ann

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go

Accepting Ourselves

While driving one day, a woman's attention focused on the license plate of the car ahead. The license read: B WHO UR. How can I? she thought. I don't know who I am!

Some of us may have felt confused when people encouraged us to be ourselves. How could we know ourselves, or be who we are, when, for years, many of us submerged ourselves in the needs of others?

We do have a self. We're discovering more about ourselves daily. We're learning we're deserving of love.

We're learning to accept ourselves, as we are for the present moment - to accept our feelings, thoughts, flaws, wants, needs, and desires. If our thoughts or feelings are confused, we accept that too.

To be who we are means we accept our past - our history - exactly as is.

To be ourselves means we are entitled to our opinions and beliefs - for the present moment and subject to change. We accept our limitations and our strengths.

To be who we are means we accept our physical selves, as well as our mental, emotional, and spiritual selves, for now. Being who we are in recovery means we take that acceptance one step further. We can appreciate our history and ourselves.

Being whom we are, loving and accepting ourselves, is not a limiting attitude. Accepting and loving ourselves is how we enable growth and change.

Today, I will be who I am. If I'm not yet certain who I am, I will affirm that I have a right to that exciting discovery.

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.

Ann

When I began recovery, several years ago, I had no idea who I was. I knew I was my mother's daughter, my husband's wife, my son's mother, my employer's employee...each mask worn perfectly for each assignment, each a reflection of those I loved but none showing any sign of the person within.

Slowly, I got to know that stranger called "me". One step at a time I allowed myself to decide what MY dreams were, what MY likes and dislikes in life included, what was acceptable and what was not acceptable in MY life and as I grew it became less and less important what anyone else thought of me...because I had come to like that stranger called "me", warts and all.

What a gift of recovery that today the person you see is the "real" thing, I wear no masks and am happy to just be me. Not everyone will like me, but if I try each day to be the best person I know how to be, then it doesn't matter if I am loved my all. I don't love everyone I meet either, and that isn't necessarily a reflection on the other person.

Today I am worthy of my dreams, today I am worthy of love and respect and today I am no longer a reflection of my surroundings but instead a free spirit who loves every day of her life.

Hugs

Serenity Bound

[quote=Ann;2134028 When I began recovery, several years ago, I had no idea who I was. I knew I was my mother's daughter, my husband's wife, my son's mother, my employer's employee...each mask worn perfectly for each assignment, each a reflection of those I loved but none showing any sign of the person within.]

That fits me to a "T". As I continue in my own recovery I can only hope to find the real "me"

Thank you Ann, for sharing that.

Hugs,
Chris

myrole

bmychelle

Thank you so much Ann for helping bring some light to an issue I am having such trouble with.

rose

Thanks Ann,

Just what I needed to here!

Me, Rose