timetogo

I am in the process of detaching, seperating, moving on, surviving a 27 year relationship with my AH.

I wanted some feedback from people who have been or on anti-depressants. I have started seeing a new therapist (not sure if I like her or not yet) but she is really pushing the meds on me. She is convinced that I am suffering long term effects of long term anxiety (I agree). She is convinced that I will feel much better and be much stronger and clearer if on meds. I am convinced that if I just take care of myself (exercise, eating, yoga, supplements) that I can combat the effects of my anxiety naturally.

I'm afraid of meds -- afraid that they will "cease my feelings" which I know are important to feel. I haven't felt anything for so long (so busy just surviving) that it is foreign to me to have the emotions that I'm going through.

LaTeeDa

I've never taken them, so I can't comment on that.

It seems clear to me, though, that you want to try to get over your anxiety without them. Kudos to you for that. You can always revisit the issue later if your way doesn't work, right? So why the rush to get you on drugs? I might consider finding a new therapist. JMHO

L

justaboutus

I was on Effexor for awhile, so that's the only one I can really speak for. I just had too much on my plate. It didn't numb my emotions. It just kept me from obsessing. I was able to keep my concentration at work, which I wasn't able to do otherwise.

One reason why I got on it was because my dad was diagnosed with cancer. My life was chaotic (Living with an A, failing marriage, caring for an infant, bills piling up, etc) Dad's diagnosis was just too much. I knew if I could just get through a few months into his treatment, I'd be ok. I was only on it for three months. I knew I wouldn't be on it for long.

Barbara52

I have taken antidepressants twice for short periods when going thru episodes of situational depression. Thank God my doctor prescribed them! At the right dosage, they are a God send, do not dull your emotions at all and allow you to work your way out of the depression.

tommyk

Same case with me.

They allowed me to feel again when I was numb & paralyzed from anxiety & depression.

Barbara52

Yup, better living through chemistry is sometimes the right thing to do.

herewego

I exercise, eat right, meditate, go to alanon meetings regularly, see a therapist. Prozac (gneric) helps me control my anger and panic. I still get angry, but it doesn't last as long. Panic attacks are gone. Long acting so if I miss a dose the blood level doesn't drop off. Takes about 6 weeks to fully work.
I want to be solid on my recovery. This is just another part of taking care of me. Only you can decide

Prozac

Despite my username and working in mental health, I'm not a big fan of anti-depressants and they are mostly pushed on consumers and doctors by pharmaceutical companies and have been normalized through excessive ad-campaigns.

However, not knowing the exact details of your case, they do have their purpose. I have meet people who cannot live without them. I have met people who they help get through a tough spot.

Above all though, no matter if you decide to take them or not, you have the right idea. Learning other methods to deal with anxiety (breathing, yoga, etc) and using exercise and activity to combat depression.

TakingCharge999

Timetogo,

I agree with LaTeeDa. Why not try the other ways first? Really commit to them, see how you feel. If you do not feel better by X day then you can consider the therapist's suggestion.

I was given Lexapro and I could also concentrate on my job much better but I felt very sleepy, tired all day, woke up tired... very tired. So against doc's rules I stopped taking them and did other things to feel better.

The pills helped me through a few tough days.

After that I had to deal with my feelings and my job resented it, but thanks to that I was able to come out from the crisis quicker. Otherwise right now I would still have my feelings stored. To me it was just like the AH numbing his feelings with something external, that's different from dealing with them (just my opinion, maybe my anxiety was not that severe).

I also prefer yoga and it helps me a great deal! It has way too many benefits... with or without antidepressants, everyone... DO YOGA :>

Seren

Every person is different, and if you do not want to take antidepressants, you should not feel pressured to do so.

I have taken two fairly short courses of Zoloft in my life with no loss of feelings or emotions, just an ability to deal with enormous situational depression (just think....I haven't taken any since my divorce....hmmmm). One sort of funny side effect I had were very mundane but very realistic dreams. I would dream things like having filled my car with gas, and then getting in the car the next day and being surprised that the tank was nearly empty!

Oh well....Best of luck with your decision!
HG

GiveLove

Same situation with me, with Paxil. I did a ten week run of them, and then tapered off and quit. I still felt my feelings, but my feelings didn't jerk me around by the hair. I consider it a very wise choice in my case. I am not a "drug person," by the way -- I rarely even take anything for headaches.

If a therapist is pushing meds on you despite your reluctance, she either sees something we don't (something intensely worrisome to her) or she isn't listening. You're the one there...you will have to figure out which is true, I'm afraid. Take care of yourself ttg

JenT1968

I have had several major episodes of depression:

1. 2 lots of post-natal depression (including right now)
   
2. one situational depression in my final year of college when my parents split up, stopped my funding and my mother repeatedly tried to kill herself (on the phone to me....)
   
3. and other non-situational episodes

I also suffer from social phobia which goes through the roof when I am depressed.

I have variously taken an old tricyclic anti-d, seroxat, prozac, citalopram (UK names, the US names may differ).

I respond very well to the SSRIs, when I am severely depressed. They are part of a package of tools (therapy, exercise, reaching out, self-care, mindfulness) I use to take control of my life when I am in a very dangerous illness cycle (I have ended up with severe paranoia, auditory hallucinations and very dark thoughts regarding my continued existance when I had untreated post-natal depression).

I can feel things PROPERLY, I am not numb with the depression or in whirlwinds of anxiety that prevent me from feeling actual real feelings about my real life.

They have no effect on me when I am well, and I am not on them permanently.

I do however have a friend whose predisposition to this disease, and the danger she is in when she is in its grip, is such that she will probably be on SSRIs for the rest of her life, no shame in that: just as there is no shame in a diabetic taking insulin for the rest of their lives, or heart meds for cardiac patients or......

I have minor initial side-effects as my body adjusts to them (some tiredness, some "spaced" feelings) which takes a couple of weeks to completely subside.

If you wan to tackle your anxiety/depression without meds: all power to you, this is your body and your life. But please don't be scared of them, I've been addicted to cigarettes and using anti-d's is nothing like an addiction, in my experience.

Techie1701

I have been on Prozac twice now. After it kicked in, it was like a cloud lifted and I was 'me' again! I found it was the depression that numbed me, and made it impossible for me to do anything, the prozac helped.

That being said, I don't know if ADs are right for you.

yeahgr8

For me seroxat (paxil) was prescribed 4 months ago (first time ever) for anxiety and it is brilliant! No side effects for me at all, feel great. Was prescribed them 7 years ago and did not take them, what a mug! IMO good for short term usage whilst going to regular counselling/therapy so one day you will be ok to come off of them. I read all the horror stories of coming off of them, don't care they have been a god send and i will cross the potential weeks of dizziness, brain flashes etc when i taper off of the drug...pssshhh so what i'd rather have a few unpleasant withdrawl symptoms than live like before, it's not like i went on them in the first place because i had a headache;-)

Good luck:-)

Mr B

About seven or eight years ago I went through a serious depressive episode triggered by events with my (then) AGF. I was so out of whack that it's only in hindsight that I can see how terrifyingly close to the edge I was. ADs, and counselling once the ADs started kicking in, quite literally saved my life.

Since then, if I'm in a particularly stressful situation for too long, I'll notice some of the symptoms coming back. I've got a carefully thought-out action plan and, most of the time, it's enough for me to notice those warning signs and then take steps to just look after myself better and deal with what's stressing me a different way.

A year or so ago that self-help didn't do the trick and, while I wasn't anywhere near as desperate as I was seven years ago, it was clear that I wasn't improving. At that point I didn't hesitate to pack myself off to the doctors and get some more ADs. I was only on them for a few months and by the end I was definitely feeling better. Who knows, maybe I'd have got through that time without them. Personally, with my history, I wasn't willing to take the risk.

TimeToGo, if you really are unhappy about taking them, then don't. All I would say, though, is that you have a clear action plan in case you start feeling worse and to follow that plan before things get so bad that you lose the ability to think clearly.

Mr B.

AbsentFriend

Me too! I take Lexapro, and will dream about something like receiving an email, and then be surprised to find that the email doesn't exist. Thanks for sharing!

RE: Antidepressants vs. Natural remedies... I was a runner for a long time and relied on the endorphins to keep me from being depressed. I knew something was wrong when, if I missed more than 2 days of running, I became depressed again and felt worthless in many ways.

I did therapy for over a year and attended ACA groups for 6 months before I went to a psychiatrist. I told him I didn't necessarily WANT medication, I just wanted to stop WONDERING if it was something that would help me.

He suggested 10mg of Lexapro at first (which ABSOLUTELY helped me with anxiety) and eventually increased it to 20mg (which did wonders for the depression symptoms, even the physical ones).

Now I run for fun, instead of out of fear.

Every person reacts differently to different meds, so I'm not saying Lexapro is the best thing for everyone. But I do believe that medication doesn't change who you are, but that it can be an integral part of undoing the residual physiological effects of chronic stress (in my case, of an ACA childhood).

My frustration threshold is higher, my interpretations of situations aren't automatically negative and personal, I don't overreact to sudden noises. it's a little like turning back time, to before I relied on defense mechanisms for survival.

It's like removing spyware from your computer... except in your brain

Osakis

I've been on Zoloft for 15 years, and it has made a huge difference in my quality of life, having suffered from low-grade clinical depression pretty much since childhood. I do have concerns about being on them for such a long time (especially having read recently of Parkinsonism symptoms in long-term users); however, I did try going without for a period of a few months last year, and had an immediate return of my depression and anxiety. So I'm back on.

One caveat: for some people, myself included, the "discontinuation syndrome" when trying to get off the medication can be very severe. While SSRIs are considered non-addictive, your brain does habituate to them and it can be HELL to try to get off them. Discontinuation symptoms include things like headaches, "electrical effects" like a jolt of electricity going through your head, mood swings and other unpleasantries. You can get off them, but often it's a LONG process of tapering down very, very gradually. Of course, some people can quit without any effects at all. [shrug]

bookwyrm

I'm predisposed to clinical depression and have been on anit depressants several times over the years. Without my anti depressants I just wouldn't be here. They help me think clearly without the fog of depression in the way - I get my energy back and can get out of bed in the morning!

I do want to ask you why you are reluctant to take them? If you have a chest infection and were given antibiotics, would you think twice about it? What do you think the consequences would be of taking them? I don't know your situation, I'm not a medical professional and I can't say whether you should or shouldn't take the pills. I just wonder why you are so reluctant (I'm assuming you trust your therapist and there aren't any other reasons for you to doubt their advice). Can you explain why you are afraid of them?

timetogo

Thank you all for your responses -- as always, such helpful insight.

To answer your questions bookwyrm, I feel reluctant because I have always had a low tolerance to medication (allergy med, cold and sinus, etc etc). What 'normal' people seem to be able to take with no problems, tend to have negative side effects for me. I also work in the mental health field and have seen a variety of "horror stories" from mis prescribed meds, too many different meds, etc. There is also substantial research that supports certain medications doing more harm than good when being prescribed for mild to moderate depression. In saying that, I have also worked with many who would not be here if it weren't for medication and truly believe it has it's place.

Also, as I mentioned, this is a new therapist to me so i have not built a relationship with her -- to tell you the truth, I don't care much for her but want to give her at least a "three session" chance. She went through a 20 question exercise with me and deemed me "severely depressed". I didn't feel that it was an effective assessment tool to "diagnose" me. I truly feel she isn't listening to me. Because I work in the field and live in a small community, I don't have a lot of options when it comes to therapists because I know them! So......trusting her is a big issue at the moment. I'm sure I will need to find someone else.

Again, thank you for all your invaluable experience

bookwyrm

I asked about your fear of these pills because you thought that you will 'cease to feel' if you take them. I didn't realise you worked in the mental health field. I wonder why you asked for the experience of those on anti-depressants and I still wonder why you are afraid. As far as my experience goes, modern anti-depressants don't stop you feeling things, they allow you to feel other emotions without the fog of depression. Since you seem very hostile to the idea of taking them and I wondered if you felt that they were somehow a sign of weakness? Your anxiety about them doesn't help you with your levels of anxiety though!

I hope you manage to find someone you can talk to that you can trust. Even if you know a lot of therapists personally, could you not approach one professionally? is there none you would rely on to maintain your confidentiality?