Day 1 AGAIN. I feel terrible!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 17
Day 1 AGAIN. I feel terrible!
I had 29 days.... then drank moderately for 5 days.... quit for 3 days at Christmas so my kids would have a good Holiday... started back a the day after Christmas... took my last drink 23 hours ago!!!!I don't know why I feel so yucky this time... I was only drinking at the most 9 mini wines in a 24 hour period during this last 4 day binge... no hard stuff.... whats 9 mini bottles? I mean 5-6 cups... thats nothing for a pro like me.... I used to have 1/2 to a whole a bottle (fifth) of vodka in a day and wine, too... and beer.... or at the very least two big bottles of wine...
I am really letting my anxiety get the best of this time. I am taking Ativan to curb it, but it doesn't seem t be helping as much tonight.... I let my fear of dying of a seizure (not that I have EVER had one) overtake me....
My husband is a good man, but he is ready to leave me.... he doesn't understand my fears or my addiction.... he says he is staying for the kids sake...
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Hi and Welcome,
I had horrible anxiety when I stopped drinking too, and all I can say is that it will get better.
It could be worse this time because alcoholism is a progressive disease. It will get worse if you don't stop.
I'm glad you found us, and please know that we do understand. There is lots of support here.
I had horrible anxiety when I stopped drinking too, and all I can say is that it will get better.
It could be worse this time because alcoholism is a progressive disease. It will get worse if you don't stop.
I'm glad you found us, and please know that we do understand. There is lots of support here.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
Welcome, and yes, please do seek medical help. Detoxing from alcohol can be dangerous. I can only promise it will get better, but it does take some time for your system to be rid of the alcohol. The first few days are rough, but it will get better. Please don't hesitate to go to the ER if necessary. Come here often and read and post. We'll help you as best we can.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 17
[QUOTE=least;2043823]Welcome, and yes, please do seek medical help. Detoxing from alcohol can be dangerous. I can only promise it will get better, but it does take some time for your system to be rid of the alcohol. The first few days are rough, but it will get better. Please don't hesitate to go to the ER if necessary. Come here often and read and post. We'll help you as best we can.[
It's been 24 hours and I feel tired of the ativan and a little anxious... but no vomiting for dry heavs... no leg cramps.. I am keeping gatorade in and I will try some yogurt in a bit... no tremors or hallucinations... just feel zombie-like, which I think is the ativan..
It's been 24 hours and I feel tired of the ativan and a little anxious... but no vomiting for dry heavs... no leg cramps.. I am keeping gatorade in and I will try some yogurt in a bit... no tremors or hallucinations... just feel zombie-like, which I think is the ativan..
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 2,548
hi and welcome.........you are amongst friends.
One of the most devastating elements of alcholism "imo" is it will tell you that "your not alcoholic" or "you can drink safetly again".
It would constantly whisper to me "your weird if you dont drink" or "a real man would be able to control his drinking"
And i wasted time chasing these fantasys on more than one occasion.
Going to great lengths to prove to myself "i could drink like i once did"
Only to be curled up on the sofa a few days later with that fear i was gonna have a heart attack....sweating...trembling....seeing monsters etc....you know the score.
Being a guy i thought i needed to fight it.. not to drink......when actually it was the opposite for me....put my hands up and surrender and say...."i give up i cant do this anymore"........"im finished"
Then and only then did i make progress and that awful "wanting" started to slip away.
So looking back...what did i do to stop in the beginning...
1..Stopped listening to the b.s my alcholism was telling me and took an honest look at my drinking.
2.Held my hands up and surrendered to the fact that if i continued to drink i was going in the ground or in jail....
By now "god willing" you should have day 1 and thats where it all starts.
Your gonna be ok and you know what to do...god be with you my friend..
trucker.
One of the most devastating elements of alcholism "imo" is it will tell you that "your not alcoholic" or "you can drink safetly again".
It would constantly whisper to me "your weird if you dont drink" or "a real man would be able to control his drinking"
And i wasted time chasing these fantasys on more than one occasion.
Going to great lengths to prove to myself "i could drink like i once did"
Only to be curled up on the sofa a few days later with that fear i was gonna have a heart attack....sweating...trembling....seeing monsters etc....you know the score.
Being a guy i thought i needed to fight it.. not to drink......when actually it was the opposite for me....put my hands up and surrender and say...."i give up i cant do this anymore"........"im finished"
Then and only then did i make progress and that awful "wanting" started to slip away.
So looking back...what did i do to stop in the beginning...
1..Stopped listening to the b.s my alcholism was telling me and took an honest look at my drinking.
2.Held my hands up and surrendered to the fact that if i continued to drink i was going in the ground or in jail....
By now "god willing" you should have day 1 and thats where it all starts.
Your gonna be ok and you know what to do...god be with you my friend..
trucker.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
