LouLou629

Sober four months today!!! YAY! Almost every night since right before thanksgiving i have some sort of stressfull dream where I drink..just a little. Last night It was a shot of whiskey and in my dream I was thinking " you will regret this " than of course I did and thought way to go looser four months down the drain...I wake up feeling weird...like all throughout the day I think " that WAS just a dream right? No way did I like black out going to some bar in the middle of the night and do one shot and come home and crawl into bed and wake up and wonder? I was a total blackout drinker and my past and all the what if's still haunt me...But it never fails..every single dream messes with my mind...messes with me good energy..makes me feel kinda weird and almost guilty and depressed..like even as I type this I know it was just a dream but why do I still feel so weird about it like it actually happened? anyone else have this happen?

coffeenut

Congratulations on the 4 months!

I don't have dreams like that. However, I think your dreams are telling you how crappy you would feel if you picked up!

Mariposa18

LouLou~ I have VERY vivid dreams, to the point where like you, I have to make sure it didn't happen! Our minds are very powerful and the fact that you feel so badly reiterates the fact that you are doing the right thing, does that make sense? The Holidays tend to bring up feelings and things we may not normally think about, maybe that is why the dreams popped up around Thanksgiving? Holiday stress?

4 months is great! Keep up the good work =)

dirtyjerz08

Congrats on 4 months. I get the dreams all the time too. Usually they aren't too bad, as I am somewhat aware that it's a dream. Still I get those feelings, even while I'm dreaming. Thinking of how I'm going to hide it, how I don't want to start over, how miserable my life would be if I went back to drugs and drinking. I usually wake up with a grateful heart once I realize that none if it was real. Still the feelings are just like those feelings of misery that I lived for so many years. I wish the dreams wouldn't happen as much, but I take them as a reminder of what it was like and why I never want to go back to that life. The other night I had a wicked one as well, felt very real. I wasn't aware in this dream that I was in fact dreaming. I picked up my alcohol of choice, and it was like the progression that I have felt after relapsing in the past. I hated the feeling, and it actually had my head messed up all day. It felt like it really happened, and I just couldn't shake it. Normally I wake up and thank God, and that feeling goes away. Sure, it was a pain in my ass that day, but it was a reminder of how things were. I guess sometimes I need to be reminded to help keep my resolve to stay sober.

doorknob

Using dreams are weird. I don't have them too often, or alteast not ones I can remember.

Congrat's on 4 months!!!!

CarolD

Those dreams will happen less often the longer
you stay sober. I figured they were a way
for my brain to clean out the toxins.

Just my idea....I ...but it gave me consolation.

Well done on your 4 months...

YouveGotStyleKi

First off, congrats on four months! That's one hell of an accomplishment!

But I was talking about this before, using dreams are just a really intense way that your disease creeps up on you... I was into Oxycontin and heroin, just snorting of course... But in a dream I snorted a few bags of dope, and I woke up feeling (strangely enough) like I was detoxing, and my right nostril was burning. My disease really wants me back, but it isn't happening this time!

yeahgr8

Real congrats on the 4 months:-)

I've had a couple of the same, where i have been in a bar and had only a gulp of a drink, then woken up realising i had not drunk or even been out but second guessing myself to check that i actually was not out somewhere the night before. On a couple of occasions ive thrown myself forward to hang over the edge of the bed, edging around, to check if my clothes are lying in a pile somewhere...that blows!

Then thinking about it for the whole morning, analysing (worst thing for me to do really) and yeah it kind of sucks that i have stopped for some time now and i am thinking about the dream and a bit pi**ed off and wondering if i am always going to have this dream etc.

But to be honest, recently i have just put these down to bad days, even if they start from a stupid dream and i am much happier having 1 bad day a week (i'll take all 7 actually) compared to the crap 'life' i had before...just talk, listen, post, read, watch, sweat...and tell your brain to shut the **** up, get through the day but do not drink! (that last statement is a little obvious!):-)

allport

Me too, when i finished detoxing this time around i had a couple of dreams that were so intense that when i woke up i actually felt hung over, the taste in the mouth, the upset stomach and all the usual negative emotions, it took me a while to convince myself that i actually hadnt drank.

Strangely the dreams all revolved around getting dressed up and hitting the town, which i havent done for years anyway.

All my recent (i.e. the last five years) drinking was done indoors and in private, I suspect it is my twisty brain (which seems sometimes to hate me) trying to persuade me to give the old social drinking a try again.

Im not falling for that one!

I havent had one of those dreams for a while but im ready for them if they reappear. x

doorknob

I still have crack dreams, and I haven't touched that stuff in over 12 years!!!!

And I wasn't even a crackhead...

least

I've only had one drinking dream, and it scared the hell out of me until I knew it was just a dream. I've been told they become fewer and fewer the longer you're sober. Way to go on four months!!

:ghug3