kcorey

We've been married for 5 years and we live in Hawaii. He is a professional surfer and has lived a party lifestyle since he was a teenager. Now we have a one and half year old beautiful daughter and he hasn't ever tried to pull it together for us and stop drinking. He is a great father except that he is an alcoholic and it is causing many problems. I just came home to stay with my family in California with the hopes that he would stop. He says we'll stop when we come home, but I know I shouldn't trust him.

Chrysalis123

Welcome Kcorey. I am glad you have found us because I know how much this site has helped me. I am sorry for what you are going through. More people will be along soon to give you a proper welcome....

I see great strength and courage in your decision to leave Hawaii and take some time caring for yourself. I had a hard time doing that at the beginning. What an opportunity to think about what you want for YOUR life, however I can imagine how hard this is for you. :ghug3

What helped me was to learn as much as I could about alcoholism/addiction. One way I did that was by spending time here reading posts and the stickies found at the top of this forum. I also see a counselor that has special training in alcoholism/addictions. Alanon has been a wonderful tool for me as well.

Again welcome, happy Thanksgiving, and you have found in us a group of people that have experience, strength, and hope to share. Please keep coming back.

Stubborn1

Alcoholics don't quit just because you ask them to. You are just giving him time to figure out another way around it or to keep it from you better. They also do not stop for children.
It's up to you to keep yourself safe and that child.

blessed4x

Welcome!! You are in the right place to get lots of love and support. What a brave decision to look out for you and your daughter. Keep posting...there are some wonderful people here!:ghug3

DII

Hang in there.....these posts are dead on. Most A's can't just stop drinking until they commit to treatment and admit they are powerless to alcohol. Is he suffering any physical effects from alcohol? Has he attended AA and does he have a sponsor? AA and a sponsor are boundry's you can insist on if you are to come home.

Barbara52

Congrats on taking the difficult step you have. Remember that actions speak louder than words. He can say anything but its meaningless unless his actions validate them. IF he is truly interested in sobriety, her will begin. Now.

I found it best to proceed with my life based on what was best for me and my children. If my now xAH had begun finding sobriety, I would not have considered going back to him until he had a considerable track record of sobriety behind him. Of course my xAH still won't even admit he's an alcholic.