madriley

I don't know if this may help any of you out there but this is something I started doing a few weeks ago and it has helped me. I can not afford to enter a rehab and I am still waiting for an appointment with my shrink so I started recording the show Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. When I am feeling pretty bad, I watch it and I relate what they do in that show to my own recovery. Last week was about mothers and how they can influence your addiction. It really helped me open my eyes about some things. I have not allowed myself to feel any emotions for so long that I do not know exactly how to bring out the reasons for my addiction and deal with them, but this show has actually helped me some. It comes on the VH1 channel if you have it. You might want to check it out. The new episodes come on Thursday night at 10 and again at 12 or 1am I think, they also replay it during the week.

northbelle

Ya know madriley you would be really great in a real life support group....
Ever been ??? You just seem like you are really looking for some personal growth...and you would fit right in...You got alot of good stuff to share..
love north

madriley

Thanks North. I have never been, you know it's always easier to think out loud when nobody is sitting in front of you. I am working on it though. I do believe that I will only succeed if I join a support group so I will keep you posted.
Thanks for the vote of confidence, it means a lot!

Was today your first day or is it tomorrow? What time is it there anyway?

sunflower1776

madriley--have you ever watched Intervention on A&E? It's on Monday nights--they are in reruns right now, but if you've never watched it it's a great reality show. Just to sum it up, it is reality--there is an addict featured each week adn the family stages an intervention with a psychiatrist/therapist (not sure their credentials) The addict doesn't know anything about it--they just said they'd allow themselves to be filmed for something on addiction. You actually see users injecting themselves, taking handfuls of pills, etc...it is the real deal. In the end there is always the intervention. I think there is some good information given. Of course they all go to gorgeous rehab facilities that the majority of us could never afford,, but it is the story behind it that hits home. A the height of my addiction I couldn't watch it anymore because I related to it too much, but it did help me realize how much help I needed as well as to see how much I relate to others--that I'm not alone in this. Check it out if you haven't! I've seen a few episodes of Celebrity Rehab but never got into it because i started listening to Dr. Drew on Lovelines years ago (it was all about sex), so I have a different perspective on him--he's a great therapist, but just not in the setting I'm used to seeing him. Glad to hear that it is helping you though!!! How long until rehab do you think?

Missybuns

keeping your recovery as your priority will work! keep on it!

oh and....what ever else you put before your recovery you will end up losing anyway.

I was told that early on....and I thought it didnt apply to me...I was unique. Nope.
I put a relationship that wasnt working ahead of my recovery, trying to force it to work...I lost that and couldn't stay clean either. Could happen with relationships...jobs, business partners...you get the idea. I found that when I put my recovery first, everything else fell into place.

Support groups are where I learned the most about recovery so that I could get real with what I needed to do to get my own recovery. I personally prefer NA. There are many support groups to choose from! I went to great lengths to get high...I do the same for my recovery.

Gratefully recovering,
Missybuns

ccgirl2

Mad, with the exception of some added drama for ratings, I really like that show. I watch it every week. I cry... a lot. If you're getting some learning tools from it, go for it.


Psst. Don't tell anyone. I have a secret crush on Dr. Drew. lol

madriley

Thanks sunflower, I have not watched Intervention, well I had a year ago when I was still heavily using but not since I am trying to stay clean. I will check it out. I can not imagine Dr. Drew doing a sex show, a little weird but I think he is so cute!

And, CC- I was a little disappointed in last night's show, the whole drama between Jeff, Gary and Sean, but I really liked the sit down with Steve and his mother, I feel so bad for him, but I am a little biased because I am a huge Guns n Roses fan anyway. I also have a little thing for Dr Drew don't be shy!! I don't know what it is maybe the gray hair!!

bval

I don't watch the show, but I'm guessing the Steve you're talking about is Steven Adler?

That dude is still doing dope? Man, he got kicked out of GUNS n ROSES, in what, like, 1988 or '89? Kicked out of G n' R, for being too strung out, right? I mean, that had to take some real 'doing', considering his bandmates, you know what I'm saying? Pretty amazing he could still be alive almost 20 years hence, if he's been in active addiction that whole time.

And the others I suppose are Jeff Conway, Gary Busey, and who's the Sean?

This actually sounds like it could be pretty entertaining ... I just might have to check it out ...

madriley

Oh yeah BV. He is still kicking, I don't know how. He's had a stroke, brain surgery and lord knows what else. Supposedly it all stems from some pretty rough crap with his mother and he has never dealt with it. I know right, for Axel to want him out? Had to pretty darn bad. Yeah, Gary Busey and Jeff Conway are going "crazy"!! And the Sean is actually Rod Stewart's son, I love Rod Stewart, I don't know how old his son is but he seems to be in his early twenties or something, he has addiction to Heroin, pills and alcohol stemming from his father being gone through his childhood and getting picked on and beat up because of his father. I guess I am a little too into the show huh? It does provide some decent entertainment though, especially when you are feeling down on yourself. There's also a model, Amber something, who is addicted with opiates along with her mother, who has had a lifelong addiction as well. She lost all of her money on drugs, then she started sleeping with men just to get money to score for her and her mother. Pretty crazy, you would never even imagine looking at her, she is a really beautiful girl.

I always had the mentality that if I were rich, I would have no problems, I could afford my drugs and never be miserable but seeing them going through pretty much exactly what we are, except they are in the nice and cozy Pasadena Recovery Center, does help some. Let me know if you check it out and how you like it!

ccgirl2

There's also Rodney King (I really really like him) Tawny Kitaen (classy lady once she's cleaned up) and Nikki McGibbon from season 1 of American Idol. I really like the fact that the place, with the exception of Dr. Drew is run by recovering addicts (love Shelly)

Yeah, the whole drama was kinda...yuck. Steven Adler makes me want to cry. His mother is an idiot.

LadyTennII

I sent in an application for my own self for Intervention, I think they kept trying to ccall and I didnt answer. Weird I know.

madriley

I love Rodney, you know how dumb I am? Until I saw him on this show, I always thought the Rodney King that got beaten was "the" Rodney King with all the hair!!! Oh but this Rodney is so cute!! I don't get the whole Nikki McGibben thing. To be honest it makes me a little angry because yeah she was an American Idol "finalist" does that make her a celebrity? I really don't think so, but I guess anyone can become one now. Maybe I will try that next!!!

That took alot of courage Lady, just to send in the application. I don't know if I could have done it. That's like when I would go online and fill out my info for rehab centers I could never afford and they would call me for a month afterward and I would have to screen my calls! I don't know I am just crazy...

madriley

I also feel so bad for Steven Adler, I know he has done his own bad things but his mother is just so cold. I loved when she said, "Doctor when a child doesn't listen and disrupts the whole house, what do you do?" Come on woman!!!

bval

That's understandable. I mean, if I'd run into Rod Stewart's kid, I'd have probably beat the crap out of him, too. Just on principle.

I mean, how did his dad go from being, like, the picture of uber-coolness in the 60s ... to just being the galactic vortex of all suckyness? Lots of musicians have managed to stay cool their whole careers ... Keith Richards, Robert Plant, Jimmy Page, Pete Townsend, Leonard Cohen, Neil Young, to name but a few ...

I'd have to say, no question, it's gotta be Sean's fault...

Done_With_It

I love this show. Been watching since it first started.
This season is great. (but Busey drives me nuts, lol)

madriley

Isn't he crazy? One minute he's like a psycho and I think he's gonna hit someone and the next minute he's praying for everyone. I know that he has brain trauma but I seriously think he would be better with a head doc than in that rehab place. I watched Grease today (one of my favorite movies) and I was so sad watching Jeff Conoway there and seeing how he is now. I actually showed my daughter the difference between then and now and I told her that is what drugs will do to you. She's been learning about it in school and I decided not to sugar coat anything because my family never talked about drugs, sex, alcohol, they just did it all and said "don't do what I do", so hopefully I will scare her enough so she won't be as stupid as me, we'll see.

I remember when Rod Stewart was like "the man" and then what happened? Vanished!!! His son actually does resemble him but he does have a little bit of "girlishness" or whatever you want to call it. I can't wait for next week's show, this weeks was alright but I like it better when they are actually dealing with the real issues instead of the little girl fights...

LadyTennII

Gary Buesy is off the chain, but so interesting to watch. Have you seen him on Americas Dumbest Criminals? They are all kind of making fun of him when he talks in a very understated way, lol. But he says some really weird stuff. You gotta love him. Wonder what he was ever like to party with. Can you imagine?

Done_With_It

Grease is my favorite movie. So insane to me.
Great thing to show your daughter! That would have scared the hell out
of me. I don't think you could believe it unless you "really" see it. Better than one of those "egg" commercials.

There is a book called, You'll never make Love in this town again,
I'm not sure Mr. Busey was ever a nice guy.
(after fame and drugs anyway)
A friend I used to work with used to party hard with him too, the stories I've heard about him are relentless.
Seeing him now, It doesn't surprise me, brain injury or none.

LadyTennII

oh man, you gotta share at least one Gary Busey party story, I bet they are hilarious. or scary? one of the two.

What about the Book you mentioned. I may have missed something. Is it about him? or what. I love to read, so Im curious

Done_With_It

I'm going to dinner w/some friends but when I get back, I'll tell ya,
it's classic......
it's circulated my building....