Spica

Well, it is official - just got back from my new appt with a bottle of suboxone (and several other items). My drop dead date for the last oxy is Friday am with my fist bupe sometime on sat.

I have the bestest Dr. (I’m a little embarrassed to say I actually cried tears of relief - just sharing the true level of my addiction with another human being face to face was somewhat cathartic).

I wouldn't have found him if you hadn't posted that great website, Sunflower!!!

I will post again Saturday after I pop my first bupe and the real world comes crashing back in. I have the feeling from what I have been reading that a few sleepless nites await me. Even the doc said to expect that.

Thanks again for pointing me in the right direction!!!

madriley

Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life Spica! Or maybe your first day will be Sat. I don't know but anyway...... great job finding the doc and going through it all. It takes so much courage to admit addiction to ourselves, and to admit it to another person is damn near impossible!

Let us know how you feel Saturday. I know when I started the Suboxone, I did not feel any change at all so hopefully it is the same for you. Keep us posted!!

sunflower1776

Congratulations Spica and thank you for your kind words--just wanting to help someone like someone helped me. Please keep us posted on Saturday how you're doing! Like Madriley said, I didn't have any problems after starting the subs either--I felt more a relief if anything-nothing physical. I did have a little increase in energy, but nothing that kept me from sleeping. Please post if you have any questions or concerns--start a new thread instead of replying to a post if you have any problems, questions, or concerns--that way we'll all see it and won't miss it in the shuffle of a bunch of posts. I'll be thinking of you--happy melting!!!

LadyTennII

tomorrow is the big day huh!! Do you mind me asking how much oxy you were on and for how long? was it legit pain that led to taking too much, or just buying off the street?Im curious, i have done it all, bought off the street too, just wonder.If you would rather not answer I understand, either way. I hope you feel GREAT tomorrow

madriley

Countdown to tomorrow! Do not be nervous, be excited. You are taking the next step towards your recovery and everything will be fine. Of course, you will not get the same high as with the oxy's but really, by the time I had first done Suboxone, my first time I got a quarter of a piece from my brother I had been in w/d for 2 days cuz I had no money, and by the time I got back home, that little piece made feel great enough to hit on my husband! Anyway, I am so excited for you! Make sure you keep us posted on how you are doing okay? Best of luck and hugs!!!
Jess
:praying

Spica

No problem sharing. I took ever increasing doses to mask emotional pain not physical. I tend towards depression (which my friends find strange because outwardly I am told I carry a friendly carefree attitude – there is just some internal bugaboo that doesn’t seem to work right deep down). Years of different SSRI’s did not do the trick but the percs handed out after surgery and root canals created a warm little center in my heart that had I been missing for a very long time.

Unfortunately with tolerance being what it is it took more and more to get the same effect – so I managed to meet “friends” that could sell me roxy’s and oxycontin, 15’s, 30’s and 40’s was where I usually lived with ~300mg on the weekdays and ~360mg on the weekends being the standard for most of this year (sometimes more).

Withdrawal s started to get pretty uncomfortable and my usage is just out of control at this point – I can’t keep it up. There are some health issues that seem to be getting worse so it is time to stop. The doc I went to see ID’d a couple of things and is going to start me on a different type of meds after a few weeks of the bupes. He didn’t stop at just curbing the addiction to oxy’s – he seems to be committed to finding what works to keep me from walking down the oxy path again. This part was a complete surprise. I was expecting to be tossed a bottle of subutex and sent on my way.

That is pretty much it in a nutshell. My pupils are slowly starting to get a wee bit larger so I figure by this time tomorrow I will be popping my first bupe. He has me popping ½ of an 8mg four times a day to start.

Spica

I had to go back to my journal to check my usage. I progressed pretty much from ~60-80mg at the beginning of the year to ~300+mg after August. Tried to attach a graph that illustrates my progression but not able to load.

sunflower1776

Spica--I just realized you're in Orlando--I'm only a few hour from you! Anyhow, one hour until "tomorrow" officially starts!! Yea!! Please keep us updated on how you're doing once you take your first one. The way he has you starting out 4mg 4x/day sounds good--about 16mg/day. I started at 24mg but found quickly that was too high and averaged out at 16mg...now I'm at 10mg and holding stable here for awhile-no plans for a drop anytime soon. Can you believe you made it to this point? Isn't it so cool to finally be able to say you're going to be done with those damn pills? Your habit is about what mine was and I think pretty much comparable to a lot of ours--at least the sub users--point being we're all doing well and I know you will too!! That is great that your doctor is going to help you emotionally/mentally as well as with addiction. That is what my doctor does--he's an addictionologist as well as a bipolar expert, so I'm getting everything from him--it's such a great way of doing things, so keep it up with him! Sleep well tonight, don't dwell on anything, and keep your arse in gear to start those subs tomorrow! You'll be in my thoughts!

bval

Good 4 you Spica ... you're doing great!

It's not that hard to switch over, you'll be fine in no time, and you're gonna be amazed at how you suddenly will just feel 'normal' again, like this whole 'addiction' thing never happened ... it's a total trip, getting onto bupes. Of course, eventually you'll wanna wean down and quit, but ... life on bupe is just so exponentially better than trying to maintain a 300mg/day oxy habit. You're really gonna be glad you made this move, trust me ...

Let us know how it goes, kay? Remember, it takes 24-48 hours for the dope to clear out of your system, and the bupe won't work 100% until the dope is all gone. So be patient, and just be mentally prepared for a short, rough patch in the beginning ...

Spica

"Remember, it takes 24-48 hours for the dope to clear out of your system, and the bupe won't work 100% until the dope is all gone."


Eek! 24 hours is beggining to feel like a long time. Last oxy was at 3pm yesterday (Friday) - it is now 10:40 am (Saturday) and the tummy cramps and chills are already getting uncomfotable. I can see waiting 24 hours until 3pm today but not until 3 pm tomorrow.

Did I mention that I am a wee bit of a wimp?



Thanks for the well wishes!

madriley

Hey Spice! You are doing great don't get down on yourself! If you feel like you would be better taking the first dose at 3 today then try it. Everyone is different, for me when I started Subs coming off of my 300mg or so daily Oxy habit, I had done my last Oxy's at about 11pm the night before my appt. My appt. was 3pm the next afternoon and I took my first sub at around 4pm, within about 20 minutes, I felt normal. I've read about alot of others on here though that it didn't help them right away so again, everyone is different. Just remember you CAN and WILL do this. You have made it this far. If you are not feeling better today can you kind of lounge around for the day? Take some baths watch some movies, that kind of stuff? We are here for you! Best of luck!