Anniversary of a Loved One's Senseless Death
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Phoenix, AZ
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Anniversary of a Loved One's Senseless Death
On Thanksgiving it will be one year since my step-daughter died of a crack overdose. I had been out of her life for 2 years, but would send cards and letters and pictures of my granddaughter. We kept in touch, but I did not ask what she was up to. I knew. For some reason I read the paper back in PA the day after Thanksgiving and imagine how it felt to read her death notice. I tried to contact the other girls and that time (didn't know where he dad was) but they hung up on me. I remember all the good times I had with this wonderful, young woman. I came into her life when she was 10. And I was helping to show her a better life before I left her dad. Shortly before I left, her mother died and we had a LONG talk. At 15 she had already been in 1 rehab and was telling me she was going to turn her life around. And I was SO hopeful. And 4 years later...she's dead. Hard to deal with that. And for a time, I wondered what if? What if I'd stayed? What if he had changed?? And good friends helped me to see if wasn't my fault. Then time to time I get angry. Angry that instead of being there all the years she needed him, he was out getting high. She died in the same crackhouse he was at all the time. He used to tell me, "let them experiment". He wanted to be a "friend" and show them what life was. Well, now she's gone. She will never get to see life. And his others girls are going down the same path. Sadly, when I talked to him a couple months ago he said..."The girls are turning out just like their mother". And I thought...WHAT???? This is a deadly drug. A deadly game that every addict is playing. And it has taken people I love. This is NOT a game!!! People die out there. But yet I have to remember I did the best I could. I got my kids out of that mess and thankfully, neither of them is doing drugs today. But I also know..they could be back in there in a heartbeat.
*~10 YEARS BABY~*
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hollywood
Posts: 9,369
Oh gosh, I am so sorry. I hate those questions that seems there are no answers too, or no fair ones. I'm sorry about your step daughter, very sorry. I am glad you and your children got out. Addiction is such an awful thing.....
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Reality......
Posts: 735
I just wish this was something that would shake addicts up but in the same way as a smoker watchs someone on oxygen they are all in denial. Denial that it will happen to them. Sorry for your loss.
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Baghdad
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Originally Posted by Blackrose56 
On Thanksgiving it will be one year since my step-daughter died of a crack overdose. I had been out of her life for 2 years, but would send cards and letters and pictures of my granddaughter. We kept in touch, but I did not ask what she was up to. I knew. For some reason I read the paper back in PA the day after Thanksgiving and imagine how it felt to read her death notice. I tried to contact the other girls and that time (didn't know where he dad was) but they hung up on me. I remember all the good times I had with this wonderful, young woman. I came into her life when she was 10. And I was helping to show her a better life before I left her dad. Shortly before I left, her mother died and we had a LONG talk. At 15 she had already been in 1 rehab and was telling me she was going to turn her life around. And I was SO hopeful. And 4 years later...she's dead. Hard to deal with that. And for a time, I wondered what if? What if I'd stayed? What if he had changed?? And good friends helped me to see if wasn't my fault. Then time to time I get angry. Angry that instead of being there all the years she needed him, he was out getting high. She died in the same crackhouse he was at all the time. He used to tell me, "let them experiment". He wanted to be a "friend" and show them what life was. Well, now she's gone. She will never get to see life. And his others girls are going down the same path. Sadly, when I talked to him a couple months ago he said..."The girls are turning out just like their mother". And I thought...WHAT???? This is a deadly drug. A deadly game that every addict is playing. And it has taken people I love. This is NOT a game!!! People die out there. But yet I have to remember I did the best I could. I got my kids out of that mess and thankfully, neither of them is doing drugs today. But I also know..they could be back in there in a heartbeat.
watching the clouds roll away
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: bliss
Posts: 87
Originally Posted by Blackrose56
This is a deadly drug. A deadly game that every addict is playing. And it has taken people I love. This is NOT a game!!! People die out there.
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