Taking5

I started car shopping at 8am today and to cut a long story short I found a car I wanted and walked out of there by noon with a new vehicle. I then took it on my first "real" drive and decided to go to a bar I used to frequent to show it off. Of course I did not plan on drinking LOL.

I went so far as to park my car in the bar parking lot before sanity returned. I pulled out of there and went home ASAP. I was thisclose to relapsing.

What bothers me is I do not know what I did to not take that first drink. I'd like to learn this so I can do it again of I ever need to. Any insights welcome.

TTOSBT

You did not put yourself in a dangerous place/position! Good for you!! Keep it up. Like they say, the good times can take us out as easily as the bad times.

Eleison

There is great wisdom simply in that space of not giving in. You realised that it was not a healthy thing for you to do, and reacted accordingly. Good for you.

Tommyh

sometimes the HP does for us certain things

Ago

Doesn't the Big Book say something along the lines of :
you were tempted

you recoiled as if from a hot flame

then you turned your thoughts immediately to other alcoholics and "gave back" last night here on the forums "giving back" what you had been so freely given

sounds like sanity my brother, sounds like something to maybe view differently, like a lesson to let you know that the insanity is but one thought away especially when things are going well, and how cunning baffling and powerful it is but also a victory for your sobriety and your program in that you did react sanely but it's also information and experience to use to make you a better and more effective sponsor.

Quite often I can't see "the lesson" in something until I "get some distance" on it

I am glad to see you here.

Pinkcuda

Ago; I wish you would have kept going. There's more to that paragraph that will better put someone at ease. We will not always have to recoil because we will never be tempted.
That gives us optimism and hope that we will not always be struggling with temptation and we will be able to live a normal life.
Pg 133
If we have to watch where we step and what we do and whom we talk to because we may be tempted, are we truely free?
Nice catch Dgillz. This is where a lot of us fail. Someday you will be able to go where you please, when you please.

All quotes are from AA Big Book 1st edition.

Taking5

Thanks all for the replies. On further reflection regarding this, I was too much into ME yesterday. Getting a new car was something I wanted and needed to do, but I wanted to show off MY NEW TOY.

If I put the shoe on the other foot and a friend or coworker got a new car, deep down I must admit I really don't give a damn what kind of car it is or what features it has. Most of us don't. We will of go for a ride with the person, or check the car out with them out of courtesy, but is this important? No.

So I was too much into me, that's my conclusion. And all of us alkies know how bad that can be for us. This is the lesson I took away from yesterday. Thanks for helping me get it.

Boleo

A Doctor that I know in AA specializes in treating drug and alcohol addicts. He say 100% of his patients suffer from a "blown insight circuit".

If you were to compile a list of all of the "promises" in the Big Book you would find that most of them are preceded by insight;

we will see
we will know
we will comprehend
we will be amazed
we will intuitively know
we will suddenly realize

Taking5

Boleo,

Could you PM me with the Dr's contact info? I would like to see if he has a colleague on the Gulf Coast.

Tazman53

Pre-solution:
Post solution:
Could it be the promises?

Keep working on that spiritual condition my man.

Teresa62

Thanks D, you really have me pondering this. I have been in situations like this and have made the right decision for no reason that I know of. It's contingent on my spiritual condition but had my condition been right I would have been able to A walk in there with no problem or B not put myself in a bad spot in order to show off. I used to ride a Harley, I had to give it up for a while because I just could not shake the ego when I got on it. I couldn't pray it away. A couple years later I bought another one, and now see it for what it is, transportation and a bank payment. Keep, up the good work and maybe next time you won't want to show it off.

Teresa

sugErspun

I think it has already been touched on...but "I" don't keep myself sober, that includes my decisions or lack of decisions.

My insight - something more powerful than your ability to make decisions kept you from taking a drink. And you are absolutely right when you say "I was thinking of me". If constant thought of others is a key to sobriety, then the opposite (constant thought of self) isn't a good place.

Thank you for sharing Dgillz..this is a great example of a higher power doing for us what we cannot do for ourselves. We may not understand it in the classic sense -but we come to rely on this.