restlessmama

Hi there;
Today is my 10th day sober I am feeling wonderful. My desire to quit is hugh and I feel such peace and contentment with my decision to finally stop...just let it go so that I dont have to continue dealing with the pain it inevitably brings.
Its been weird though because I have such *emotions* these days! I feel anxious at times and weepy, I seem to look deeper into alot of things that I normally would have. I suppose that perhaps these feeling are what 'dry' people probably feel but I am not used to them because I am used to being impaired.?

I am finding that this path has alot to do with patients. Patients with myself. Patients with making my decisions more slowly so that they are the right ones. Patients with situations and people so that I dont frustrate myself (for real or just in my addicted mind) and decide "I need a drink now..."

I need to learn that it is ok to take my time, be ok with time, and not expect or always strive for insta-results as I call them.

No matter what I must continue along. I know that if I dont I will hate a part of myself. Actually now that I think that through again I will have lost all faith in my self, have lost my self... self being kai. (my life force)

No, thats not going to happen.....

Thanks for giving me a place to see my thoughts

22NGONE

Restless,

It is quite a big change dealing with emotions and feelings, I was on quite a roller coaster for a while there, thanks to my HP and patience, things have leveled out a bit now and I have realized just how much of a work in progress I still am! :-)

Good luck on your journey,
]
John

Aysha

Thank you for sharing.
You got the right idea there.
Take it slow and keep it simple.
Be easy as they say.
You sound like you are off to a good start.
Great job on your 10 days.

least

I have the same problem dealing with the emotions that are no longer buried in alcohol. Having to learn new coping skills and deal with things without being 'numb' is a real challenge. Being sober by itself is not enough, I have to learn a whole new way of thinking. That's harder than staying sober.

four812

i like that phrase of yours: Insta-results.
definitely a theme of my life

I too am facing emotions....lately it's been the emotion of "I am bored".

I feel bored
I feel lonely
I feel fear

these have been my 3 main ones.

thanks for your post and helping me feel less alone

Anna

That's a great post Restlessmama.

I was always an extremely impatient person. One thing I have learned in recovery is to pause before reacting. And, in that pause, take a breath and think. Do I want to say what is on the tip of my tongue?

SoBearish

Great post and great job on your 10 days!!!

HeavyJ

I'm right here with you restless.. Good for you!

heavy

blue412

restless
I'm right there with you.. Congrats on day 10!

Tazman53

10 days is awesome restless!!! Early sobriety was like an emotional roller coaster ride for me, the longer I was sober the smoother most of the ride became, but I still had some vicous bumps that I could not seem to get past, the steps helped me get over them.... that and staying sober!!!! You sound like you are off to a great start.

CarolD

Good for you....sobriety rocks!