My father is an alcoholic...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 3
My father is an alcoholic... and I have a few questions....
He went to detox almost 3 weeks ago.. He was going to stay for a longer program, but because of insurance he had to leave after 4 days..
He searched for a daily AA meeting here, called for more info & to make arrangements, was told they would call back & he didn't receive a call back..
We'll 4 days later he started drinking again..
He is also taking Prozac...
So after 2 weeks of this he can barely walk, is sleeping about 18 hours a day, barely eating- has lost 20 pounds, he fell 3 times today - he just can't seem to find his balance - he basically stays in bed ALL day - he may be out of bed for 2 hours a day, he is not always making it to the bathroom in time, VERy forgetful, constantly repeating himself, doesn't make sense alot of the time & can barely talk properly..
I would guess he drinks 1/2 a liter of Vodka a day on a bad day.. On a "good" day he would take maybe 4 drinks a day, but they are guzzles straight from the bottle.
Can anyone help me understand this?? What does it sound like is going on, from the symptoms? How does the Prozac & drinking affect one another??
My mother is at her whits end and MAD & My brother is SO ANGRY & I am lost, confused, maybe a little hurt, but I am really trying to help everyone.. What can we do? Is there anything we can do??
Does anyone know anyone that this has similairly happened to?? Our biggest fear is he is going to die soon. And actually he says he is dying now.. We are thinking the drink is just talking, but how do we know?? If he continues like this, how long could he live??
So sorry for the rambling post.. I've been holding alot of this in & have just unleashed it upon you guys..
Thanks for any / all help!! Heather
He went to detox almost 3 weeks ago.. He was going to stay for a longer program, but because of insurance he had to leave after 4 days..
He searched for a daily AA meeting here, called for more info & to make arrangements, was told they would call back & he didn't receive a call back..
We'll 4 days later he started drinking again..
He is also taking Prozac...
So after 2 weeks of this he can barely walk, is sleeping about 18 hours a day, barely eating- has lost 20 pounds, he fell 3 times today - he just can't seem to find his balance - he basically stays in bed ALL day - he may be out of bed for 2 hours a day, he is not always making it to the bathroom in time, VERy forgetful, constantly repeating himself, doesn't make sense alot of the time & can barely talk properly..
I would guess he drinks 1/2 a liter of Vodka a day on a bad day.. On a "good" day he would take maybe 4 drinks a day, but they are guzzles straight from the bottle.
Can anyone help me understand this?? What does it sound like is going on, from the symptoms? How does the Prozac & drinking affect one another??
My mother is at her whits end and MAD & My brother is SO ANGRY & I am lost, confused, maybe a little hurt, but I am really trying to help everyone.. What can we do? Is there anything we can do??
Does anyone know anyone that this has similairly happened to?? Our biggest fear is he is going to die soon. And actually he says he is dying now.. We are thinking the drink is just talking, but how do we know?? If he continues like this, how long could he live??
So sorry for the rambling post.. I've been holding alot of this in & have just unleashed it upon you guys..
Thanks for any / all help!! Heather
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: South Africa, Pretoria
Posts: 126
I'm so sorry you have to live with this. I couldn't believe it when I read your post!
If I have to go back & read some of my posts, the similarities are uncanny!
I was in basically exactly the same situation - my mother even turned to medicine herself to get away. My brother is very angry, but so depressed. I was in the middle of it all. Not knowing what to do.
I have since moved out - 2 weeks ago. You would not believe the difference it has made. My dad got a bit of a wake-up call. We also thought he was on his death-bed. Are you able to do something like that for yourself? I know it might not be so easy. When I posted my previous post while under stress from alcoholic father & dosed-up mother, & then ppl still told me to move out - I felt it was impossible, selfish....I was wrong. I couldn't have done any better!
I hope you are able to find happiness in all this mess!!!!!
If I have to go back & read some of my posts, the similarities are uncanny!
I was in basically exactly the same situation - my mother even turned to medicine herself to get away. My brother is very angry, but so depressed. I was in the middle of it all. Not knowing what to do.
I have since moved out - 2 weeks ago. You would not believe the difference it has made. My dad got a bit of a wake-up call. We also thought he was on his death-bed. Are you able to do something like that for yourself? I know it might not be so easy. When I posted my previous post while under stress from alcoholic father & dosed-up mother, & then ppl still told me to move out - I felt it was impossible, selfish....I was wrong. I couldn't have done any better!
I hope you are able to find happiness in all this mess!!!!!
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
You are the child. Your father is the parent. You are involved in the role reversal that happens often with alcoholic families.
Perhaps your mother could call the family doctor and tell him/her what's going on. The doctor may be able to tell her what needs to happen.
Unfortunately.....as all of us are....you are powerless over your father's actions. You can only control you. Concentrate on what you need to do to be healthy and feel safe and secure.
This has to be very difficult for you to witness and I'm so sorry that you are dealing with such a painful situation. Love yourself and do something nice for you today.
gentle hugs
Perhaps your mother could call the family doctor and tell him/her what's going on. The doctor may be able to tell her what needs to happen.
Unfortunately.....as all of us are....you are powerless over your father's actions. You can only control you. Concentrate on what you need to do to be healthy and feel safe and secure.
This has to be very difficult for you to witness and I'm so sorry that you are dealing with such a painful situation. Love yourself and do something nice for you today.
gentle hugs
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
I would also like to add that the option of calling AA again is there. I don't know about the AA contacts there, but we have 3 AA contacts for our small group here just in case someone can't be reached.
The salvation army also offers free rehab. I don't know if that is an option in your area.
As far as I know, most antidepressants come with the warning to not drink alcohol while taking them. It completely negates any positive effects of the antidepressant. Alcohol IS a depressant.
The salvation army also offers free rehab. I don't know if that is an option in your area.
As far as I know, most antidepressants come with the warning to not drink alcohol while taking them. It completely negates any positive effects of the antidepressant. Alcohol IS a depressant.
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: ontario, canada
Posts: 540
Hi Heather my mother was an alcoholic and also prescibed anti-depressants. Not a good mixture and can be very dangerous. You may want to contact his doctor and explain his behaviour. Until he is ready to get help nothing will change. You truly must take care of yourself. Im sorry you are going through this it is devestating to see someone we love destroying themselves. Be kind to yourself.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 3
I called his doctor today, left a message for the nurse, I am still waiting for a return call.
It is SO sad to watch, to watch him kill his self & not seem to care..
I don't live with my parents, I am married and live about 30 minutes away. Although I am currently over there alot right now. We are remodeling their house, which was close to ruins..
Hopefully, the dr can/will help.. He's not the best in the world, but it is who they have right now.. Dad wants to talk to a therapist right now, but we can't find one that'll talk to him while he's drinking & it is so hard to get dad to understand why.. He just thinks they don't want to help.. All he talks about is how he can't find help, no one will help him..
Ultimately, it is up to him, if he'd quit drinking there would be all kinds of help out there. He just has to decide which is more important to him & right now the Vodka is.. cries3:
It is SO sad to watch, to watch him kill his self & not seem to care..
I don't live with my parents, I am married and live about 30 minutes away. Although I am currently over there alot right now. We are remodeling their house, which was close to ruins..
Hopefully, the dr can/will help.. He's not the best in the world, but it is who they have right now.. Dad wants to talk to a therapist right now, but we can't find one that'll talk to him while he's drinking & it is so hard to get dad to understand why.. He just thinks they don't want to help.. All he talks about is how he can't find help, no one will help him..
Ultimately, it is up to him, if he'd quit drinking there would be all kinds of help out there. He just has to decide which is more important to him & right now the Vodka is.. cries3:
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