Paulos

Hello once again all... how are you doing. Better than I am probably... can't absorb anything people say to me when it's a complex sentence, or don't want to... can only think about when it's time to drink... I'm very depressed, my mind is in a bad bind... going off the Risperdal soon completely... maybe the drugs are what is messing me up... I don't know but I know if I keep going this way it'll end up bad... I'm real scared and I'm really beginning to think I'm a ******... it's pitiful and I know I keep saying my sad story but I have an overactive mouth I can't help it... I'm sorry if I'm bothering anyone.

Astro

You're not bothering me Paulos, and I don't think you're a ****** or anything else. You're a person who needs recovery, just like the rest of us on SR. Have you ever thought about that, recognizing the similarities rather than the differences?

Many of us have been depressed, obviously most of us have abused substances, and yes if you keep this up it'll probably end up bad.

But there's nothing pitiful about reaching out for help and support. Please keep trying, I know you can do this. I really don't think you would've stuck around this long if you didn't want something better.

Paulos

Thanks astro I just hope nothing bad does happen..

Astro

How about a little positive thinking Paulos? If I spend my time thinking about what bad things might happen in my life, well, eventually they're probably going to happen.

nandm

Paulos, I am sorry that you are struggling right now and have continued to struggle for quite a while now. I agree with Astro, hang in there and keep trying. There are many roads to recovery. Hopefully you will find the one that works for you.

Paulos

Thanks, I'm going off my Lamictal again *god save me* the drugs may be what's messing me up.

historyteach

Have you spoken to your doctor yet, Paulos?
I hope so.

Shalom!

Paulos

My doc was the person who put me down too low on the Lamictal originally.

Astro

Paulos, have you ever considered seeing another doc, getting a second opinion? I only ask because it took me three doctors to find one who prescribed me something that helped.