nicole17

My boyfriend has been in rehab for his substance abuse and depression for about 10 days now, and three of his friends texted his phone, which he told me to keep, asked where he was and continued to call day after day. I figured instead of leaving them worried, I told them where he is and that he's getting help for his drug addiction. All three of them were VERY supportive and said they'll be thinking of him, etc. Then I told my boyfriend on the phone last night that I had told them he was in rehab and they were thinking of him and wishing him luck. He quickly snapped at me for telling them. He said he doesn't want anyone to know because it's embarrassing for him eventhough they all supported him. I just need someone who's gone through this process to explain to me why it is wrong to let others know where he is because when he gets out, the same people are going to be going to him for drugs. Please help because I really hurt him last night and I'm sure he's still angry with me today. Thanks so much!!

Nicole

justanothrdrunk

Overall, people have a right to privacy. Telling someone about someone else's medical condition without their consent could definitely cause some hurt feelings in general.

BUT...
Keep in mind that he's in his 1st 10 days of treatment. I wasn't exactly the nicest, most pleasant guy to be around whenever I was in treatment. I find it very easy to get a little ornery when in treatment.

I'll bet that, given time, he won't have a problem with the people that are closest to him knowing. But remember that it's his place to tell others, not yours.

All you can do is apologize and try not to let it happen again. I have a feeling he'll get over it.

katie44

I think most of us have done the same thing, telling other people about there addiction. You told them because he is there friends and you want people to be supportive. My AS was furious over me sharing his addiction with other people. True he has a right to privacy let him tell who he wants. Prior posting is correct hes only been there 10 days, he wont be in the best of moods. You didnt hurt him on purpose, "Im sorry" should help.
Welcome to this board! (((( hugs))))

nicole17

Thank you thank you thank you!!

Also I had a question... Last week (his first week in treatment) he was so happy and thankful that he was there getting help, now this week, his second week, he calls me and yells "You have no idea what I'm going through right now!! I just want to go home!" And he's right, I don't know what he's going through because I have never been an addict. So I don't know what to say but I'm sorry I don't know and I'm so proud of you! It is very hard answering his phone calls sometimes because I feel like all he wants to do is yell at me and get angry...I'm sure this is normal but how long will it last? because I miss my super kind, generous, loving boyfriend!!!! Help! Thank you so so much!!

Chino

The first week he was feeling the relief from breaking the addiction, now he's feeling the cravings from it. You didn't say what his drug of choice is, but if it's opiates the first 3 days gets them past immediate physical withdrawals but the cravings last for quite a while. In about a month he'll probably sound a lot better.