Wharf Rat

I want to get sober. I think. I am at a loss for words...can this really be happening again? Alcohol is my master...I am beat.

I have tried and tried time and time again to get sober and not feel the need to give in to the craving for alcohol. But I obsess about it constantly, even though I hate being drunk...and I especially hate being hungover.

Alcohol will destroy my life...maybe not now, maybe not next year. But I can feel it seeking my death, and it won't stop until it does. I hate being an alcoholic and I just plain hate life today.

Thanks for reading. It eases my racing mind and heart just coming to this site and readng/posting. Hopefully someday I will be able to come here and write something that may help someone else. I wish I was sober, or at least had the guts to try.

Rowan

Welcome to Sober Recovery

You said it best - you're on the fence. Until you want to get sober more than you want to get drunk, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Stick around, read some posts, share a little more, and think hard about whether you want to live a sober life. It's the greatest thing I have ever experienced. It's difficult in the beginning, yes, but the best decision I have ever made in my life.

tommysi

Hello. I feel your pain. I have only been drug-free for 4 days and I feel like hell. But trust me, the feeling of pride far overcomes the feeling of hell. You will be so proud of yourself, trust me you should, it is a big accomplishment. Just that fact that you made this post shows that you want to change. Go for it! You are worth it and remember, nothing worth having ever came easy. But in the end, you will be victorious. Good luck!! Every time you feel you need a drink, just come here and read and post. It helps me to no end. Give it a try and let us all know how you feel. This place is full of positive support.

Goodnfast

You said it! And welcome to SR.

I'm an older guy who sat on the fence over 30 years and you're absolutely right...if you don't handle the problem it *will* get you some day.

Coming here is a great start. There are lots of great people to relate to the same problem.

Anna

Hi,

The obsession lifted for me when I decided in my heart to not drink. I hope you keep trying to stop drinking because addiction is a relentless disease.

mike_mass

Welcome! I would try to find a fellowship for support.

lostmdboy

Welcome! We feel your pain. I know it took a lot for this alcoholic to finally Gather enough curage to ask for help, but it is the first step of recovery. Keep coming back there is a lot of sobriety here.

CarolD

Welcome to SR!

nogard

Welcome to SR

vashti45

Welcome to SR. Since you've posted here, there is part of you that realizes you need to stop drinking. The content of your post shows that too. But we all (all of us addicts) need help to stop. Get help. SR can help, but get someone--AA, a therapist, a reliable good friend, in-patient treatment, a spiritual fellowship, or all of the above. You know what lies on one side of the fence you're on. Check out the adventure on the sober side. I'm still very new to it (12 days), but I can tell you it's quite a ride, in a very different way from the one alcohol takes you on. I repeat: get help. Don't sit on the fence alone.

Peace,

Jana

stonewolf

(((((Wharf rat)))))))))))) perhaps you have already given up, but I Pray you haven't.

Sucks to be you Huh! Just a little "wharf rat" stuck under a moldy pile-on...... Yeah, I hear ya..... but I do believe that the farther we PUT ourselves down, I:E, under the wharf as a rat, the farther down we can fall........

how's about jumping up on top of the wharf and becoming the sea gull that gains the wings to fly outta there??

I'm not one to talk, I'm not long sober, but I DO BELIEVE, that if we can find SOMETHING TO BELIEVE, we can FLY....please hon, hang in there and don't give in, because this is an insidious disease that can and WILL take us down if we have nothing to believe in.

Sober Recovery, in the past few days, after a loss and much grief, has given ME something to believe in..... let SR be your wings, until you can find strength on your own... you DON'T have to DIE.... THEY PROVE IT EVERYDAY!!

God Speed... Stonewolf

ANGELINA243

You already have. Listen, don't give up the fight. As long as you are alive--you still have a chance. Keep posting! I'm glad that you are here! :ghug2

Anodyne

Welcome
and I know exactly how you feel.

Man, is alcohol a jerk.
And we can become jerks when drinking it. Blah.
Anyway, I know it can be done. I hope it goes great for you.

There is a lot of good support at SR.

barb dwyer

Hi Wharf Rat - welcome to SR.