tzoller0501

The past two years in college i have been building a life. And for the most part i am very happy with it. Also in the past 2 years my family life keeps going down hill. Before, i had a great relationship with my sister, and my dad. My parents were still together... Since i have moved out my mom has attempted suicide, and calls me to tell me how much she wasnt to die. My sister is does not support my life at all... infact she told me she does not want me to talk to her about my life or my boyfriend at all (yeah she said that!). My family is soo important to me and it just hurts i guess. I dont agree with the way my sister is living her life but it doesnt mean that i am not going to be there for her. i dont know anymore... i guess I always thought that no matter what, even if everything goes to **** i would still have my family. They would always be there. But i guess i was wrong.

Spiritual Seeker

If you are currently in college you must have semester finals coming up.
If this is the case, detach from your family and stay focused on your classes.
Don't let them emotionally drain you. Then at semester break you can better access what your role in the family is.

SaTiT

I was giving music lessons to a student that want to become a shink.lol
He wanted to incorperate music into therapy.

He also knew i was having a hard time with my family..so half the
time I was gving music lessons and the other half i was getting therapy
in returned.lol

anyway, this is what he told me, i had to think hard about it becuase
it struck a chord in me.

" family can make you or family can break you".

So sorry you're going through it. Please don't be hard on yourself,
and tried to let go of the guilt.

Rella927

Welcome to SR! Glad that you found us here....and I'm so sorry that you are going through this with your family.

I have found that when I detach from my family in a loving way that I have allowed myself to live my life and them to live their own. My sister and I did not speak for close to 3 years because she was unable to handle her own life-I took that personal at first but, it was because she needed to work through a lot of her own pain and had to do it on her own! I get that now! My sister and I are now better friends than ever!

We can love our family-and be there for them if they need us to be but, sometimes they are just not always capable of handling their own lives and cannot be there for us in ways we may need.

Try to focus on your studies and get through that first! Take it one day at a time-and maybe even check out an Al-Anon meeting or ACoA meeting! They have helped to guide me in the direction that I need to be in my life!

Keep posting!