tep 1
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: emmaus pa
Posts: 4
tep 1
I've gone to naranon meetings , off and on, for 5 years or so, but I've just recently gotten a sponsor and started working the steps. My question on step 1 is:
Since NA's step 1 says"powerless ove addiction", shouldn't Naranon's also read that way instead of "powerless over the addict"? If power means control, we don't really need to admit it; every sane person knows he can't control other people's actions.
If it means influence, then it isn't really true. Everybody has some influence over others, no matter how little.
Just as the addict's problem doesn't lie in the drugs, or in anything outside himself, our problems lie not in the addict but within ourselves, in our unreasonable actions and reactions. The thing that's overpowering us is not the addict. The fact that we are powerless over them is beside the point. What matters, and what needs to be corrected, is that , like the addict, we can't control our own actions.
Since NA's step 1 says"powerless ove addiction", shouldn't Naranon's also read that way instead of "powerless over the addict"? If power means control, we don't really need to admit it; every sane person knows he can't control other people's actions.
If it means influence, then it isn't really true. Everybody has some influence over others, no matter how little.
Just as the addict's problem doesn't lie in the drugs, or in anything outside himself, our problems lie not in the addict but within ourselves, in our unreasonable actions and reactions. The thing that's overpowering us is not the addict. The fact that we are powerless over them is beside the point. What matters, and what needs to be corrected, is that , like the addict, we can't control our own actions.
Rest peacefully Sonny Boy
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Florida, Tennessee
Posts: 840
Hi Naomi,
Well, you just confirmed what I've always said about myself, I'm not sane. I always thought I could control or influence my exah. I sure gave it one hell of a try. For me, until I gave up all illusions to that, then there was no other steps, there was no peace, there was no hope...for me.
His influence in my life, in my famlies life was something I thought I could control. The fact that we are powerless over them IS the point. Comming to accept that in myself, that I am only in control of myself. That was hard for me to come to terms with.
Most of my actions and reactions were reasonable, that's one reason I had such a problem with working on me, not him. I was the reasonable one, the sane one, the one who had control over how I reacted.
Maybe you don't need to admit it, but I do.
B
Well, you just confirmed what I've always said about myself, I'm not sane. I always thought I could control or influence my exah. I sure gave it one hell of a try. For me, until I gave up all illusions to that, then there was no other steps, there was no peace, there was no hope...for me.
His influence in my life, in my famlies life was something I thought I could control. The fact that we are powerless over them IS the point. Comming to accept that in myself, that I am only in control of myself. That was hard for me to come to terms with.
Most of my actions and reactions were reasonable, that's one reason I had such a problem with working on me, not him. I was the reasonable one, the sane one, the one who had control over how I reacted.
Maybe you don't need to admit it, but I do.
B
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: NJ
Posts: 702
I also had to admit that I was powerless over the addict. I remember first starting here and at Nar-Anon and being told the 3 c's now when I lead a group I always tell that to the new members.
1. You didn't Cause it
2. You can't Control it
3. You can't Cure it
I finally got step one when I admitted to myself that I was powerless over everyone but myself, and even then I would rather leave it to my HP. This way I know things will be done better than if I take matters in my own hands.
1. You didn't Cause it
2. You can't Control it
3. You can't Cure it
I finally got step one when I admitted to myself that I was powerless over everyone but myself, and even then I would rather leave it to my HP. This way I know things will be done better than if I take matters in my own hands.
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