CE Girl

I was asked recently, "Is SR a phase?" Did I think I would ever post again?

I may not post as much as I did when I first got here, but I have never "left". Funny thing though, I have found "life" to "replace" my co dependancy. And like the journey I travelled to get there, SR for me, is a series of "levels". I absorb each one. When I first came to this site, I observed. Was here a good month, lurking in the background, READING EVERY thing I could. Post by others, in varying "levels" themselves. Till one day, I reached the "level" of reaching out. FOUND so much love and peace through reply's, I wanted more. LISTENED and LEARNED from those who have gone before me. Took what I needed, combined with a strong outside support system such as alanon and family/friends, that I was able to reach a NEW level. To think about and DO for me. Take care fo myself, and live true to my core. And do I not "need" SR? I'm here, quietly waiting and observing again, as I prepare for what I sense will be another "level" in my SR family.

To try and give back

SR for me, is as precious as my island once was. An oasis in the madness. Sanity and serenity, and the commonality of mortal challenges and weaknesses. I have laughed, cried, loved and mourned with my sista's and brothers who are working to make their lives BETTER. Addict and Codependant, united in our bond to help each other with the pain. Constantly working to make ourselves BETTER, which enriches out world and the people in it we love. It is a breathe of life

I see people who have been here far longer than I, and I KNOW, it is not a "phase"

It is part of my CONTINUING recovery and goal to be the best CE Girl I can be

PEACE and LOVE

best

People come and people go. People return. I would think of it as a phase or maybe many little ones all connected. Will I be here forever...would be nice because I find the people here so nice but I know that a day may come that has life take more of my time used here and will have me focus it in other places.
Maybe not a phase but more of a journey on a wonderful road is what I would call it.

Rella927

I would agree with this too! I have come and gone and come back-(I personally will be sticking around here now if people like it or not! LOL because i'm sticking to my recovery and SR is one of my "saving graces" with wonderful people from all places of both the world, emotionally,addictions, diseases helping me to continue to grow each and everyday!)

It is all in what you feel/think CE!

And your thinking is growing each day-way to go...keep up the good work if you stay or go! The SR door is always open!

hbb

I know for me, i couldn't have done it without SR and you guys I think i'm healing alot faster than trying to do it on my own. It's weird but i almost feel guilty for feeling better these days in a place where there is so much pain. I know that pain all too well and hope for me and so many of you that you continue going forward in a happier journey. I truly couldn't have done it without this wonderful place

MsGolightly

i couldn't have made it without SR, either. i have days or weeks where i feel like i don't "need" to read or reply here much... just because my life has taken another direction for the time being... or i've found a different way to cope with the situation at that specific point in time. either way, i love being able to read and reflect on things others have posted here... i would never be at the place i am without SR.

Missy

SR is something you never graduate from or finish... I believe that is why it is here on this forum.
I can leave for a while for whatever reason and then come back and pick up as if I was never gone..
that is also total acceptance which we also learn form the 12 steps of Al-anon and AA
missy xo

Astro

SR is another part of 12th Step work for me, carrying the message. Gotta give it away to keep it! The best part is sharing with a community that I love, having a "cyber recovery family" is pretty cool. It also gives me an outlet for the free time I have during my work day.

Someday other commitments might take more of my time, but for now SR is a huge part of my journey in recovery.

GlassPrisoner

Yup , I'm here to help. But, I learn just as much from others too.

WantsOut

I have actually been trying not to come here as much as I once did because it keeps me in that old situation. It's over now. We're divorced. He's gone. Coming here is like keeping contact in a way.

But to call my time here a "phase" does not feel right. I don't know if I would have made it out without these folks and this message board. To know that the guilt trips were common and that I was not a monster for wanting a life and freedom ... to post here saved me plain and simple.

But, yes, it is a passing era for me.

Wascally Wabbit

I remember joining when Ann had just under 1000 posts!! I loved it here, but my ex somehow found out who I was, and I stopped coming for about a year. Then, I made up a new name, and here I am again!! Only now, I could care less if he knew the Wabbit was his exwife!

This place really has helped me so very much, that if I didn't have SR to come to, I would be totally insane.
The very fact that I have somewhere to go 24 hours a day is so helpful when I have been at my wit's end and no person to talk to.

chero

I can honestly say without SR I would still be living with my AH or worse.

I've shared so much of my life here, gained so much from everyone here, been mad at a few, cried with some, and even made friends that I talk to every single day.

But I have questioned myself the past few weeks because I seem to be pulling away from posting. I still come here but haven't been posting much. I felt sad and overwhelmed when I saw so many new people joining in. It felt like alcohol was winning. That and sometimes the truth is just too hard to handle. That's hard to admit.

But, do I think SR is a phase? No way.

For every rung on the ladder out of the hell I had been living in, SR has been there. You guys have been there. That's what is so great about this place. There is always someone who has made it and gives you hope.
And when you can't see the next step there is someone just far enough ahead to keep the path illuminated. And the real key, there is always someone coming up behind you who needs some help and some hope.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, "I HEART SR!"

keepingmyjoy

I am too new to say it is a phase. But I can say this...I am so grateful for this site! Somehow it always seems that when the bad stuff happens, it is late at night, or when no one answers when I need to call and talk on the phone to a friend. Like tonight, what a bad night. But here I am reading and have a place to go when I feel like I have no where else to go. Thank you SR and all of you for being there.

AWEDA

This site has been such a blessing to me personally. It is very hard to find people who understand how you are feeling without judging you. I have the greatest family and friends but they do not truely get where I am at in my life. So many people are ignorant to addiction and codependency, they just believe that we are fools for staying so long. The meaning I have found in these posts from all of you has been a gift sent from God. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart. Andrea

itiswhatitis...

i post mainly on f&f substance abuse but frequent the *whole lot* of sr - i think we all *take what we need and leave the rest* - somedays we need a lot more *help* than other days - somedays we feel a lot more strength than other days - somedays we just need to feel like we belong - that people *get it* - so we read, we share, we cry, we hope - such is life...

the other day i posted that here on sr so much wisdom has come from so much pain - we have somethig in common that has brought us here and we learn from each other's pain - aren't we lucky it's here?...

love,
s

CE Girl

For this native hippie, all I can say is I "feel" the love with these posts. I'm hoping the "powers that be" here on this site, realize what a service they give to those who desperately need it.

I've thought this too WO, but have since come to realize, I NEED to stay in "contact" with "from whence I came". Always remember, never forget the parts of me that allowed me to get caught up in the "drama". The insucurities and underlying issues that brought me to this place to begin with. To learn the lesson and do everything in my power to never repeat it.

I can't tell you the number of times, SR has been my "life ring" when I was about to drown. There have been literally dozens of times, if i did not come here, I would have definately gone there The pressure of my codieism combine with the cunningness and powerful pull of my A jeopordizing the progress of detachment. Instead of calling/emailing/seeing him, I would come here to read, post and fortify my spirits.

This part SISTA has been hard for me too. When I come and read, I want to bypas the memories of my first days of decision. The pain of the grief. I read those who are begining the struggle and I want to run. I've come to the conclusion its because I am not "fully" healed, but simply at a place where the initial confusion and shock has begun to wear off. And sometimes I get frustrated. I want to help the "newbies" by shouting in their ear, "GET A CLUE,,don't make the pain last any longer than it has too"! And in a way, wonder, if by not taking the "tough love" stance, are we "enabling the enabler"? What I do know, is the ones that were up front and honest with me during those days, stung a tad, but made me THINK!! As far as being afraid alcohol is winning. Fear is a lack of faith. Where there is faith, there is hope. I will NEVER allow the baffaling disease to take that from me. The newbies are the "hope"

Peace

Missy

WantsOut:
but look now all the strength, hope and experience you can share with us who are so pathatic(that's me).
The knowlege of someone else lots of times gets me to see the light!
missy xo

Firefighter

I would still be very lost without SR. I did get better in how I relate to my aw. I still make mistakes. I still have rough nights. But I come here and it helps so much.

aGrandma

I just come here sporadically when things get bad at home....here I am again! Things are bad again!! I should say "STILL" - they never got better.

kermit

I think we come and go getting what we need and giving what we need. I'm always here checking in to see how everyone is, and if I need to post I post, and If I feel my "wisdom" will help someone else I try. I would have never made it with out this place and ALL of you

DesertEyes

There's a story goes round the fellowship about a boulder in a river.

People would come to the river and would not be able to cross it, were it not for this boulder that was located at just the right place. The people would cross the river, thank the boulder for it's service and go happily along the path of their life. Never to return.

One day there came a person who thought that little bend of the river where the boulder lay was just perfect. It was peaceful, and shaded. All kinds of birds frolicked in the bushes and flower bloomed along the banks. That person decided they liked it so much that they stayed, and became a second boulder in the river.

Time went by and eventually so many boulders gathered that they became a bridge. The river was ever more beautiful because it was decorated by this wonderful bridge. People still came, crossed the river and went on about their life.

Every time a person crossed that bridge they remembered how beautiful it was, and how peaceful. Somewhere along their path those people came across a new river, and remembered the lesson of the first bridge. Eventually, every river in the land had it's own bridge, as people chose their own place to settle and become a boulder that helped others.

SR is my river. Every single day that I come here I see _dozens_ of people reaching out to those in pain. People who themselves are going thru some of the most horrible challenges life can have. And yet they reach out in kindness, with compassion and even love.

Every single day.

I have never found such a beautiful place in all my travels. So many people spreading so much kindness. Why ever would I _not_ want to come here and marvel in the beauty that all you angels are spreading? Every time one of you shares I know that the world has improved, like the blooming of a flower. Every time one of you comes back to say your life is better it is rainbow reaching across the hills.

You guys are my boulders. SR is my bridge. Your hope and humor and wisdom have helped me over the challenges of my life.

Why ever would I _not_ want to come here every day?

Mike