Room1

I am not sure why I am going to type this, not even sure what I am going to say, but I feel that someone here will understand, I need hope i think?

I had been sober for 12 days, thats real good for me Yesterday I was craving, real bad but I did that one day at a time thing, told my self I can drink tommorow if I want. Well tommorow came and I still wanted

I feel so alone in this, I have no one talk to in RL, and I don't mean just about alcohol, I have 2 brothers, 1 sister, both parents alive and three daughters, yet I am alone.

Luckerly or unluckerly, I have yet to decide, my daughters don't know i have a problem. I once asked my eldest (she is 10) had she seen me drunk, I couldn' bear it if she had, but she answered no, thats good I think, but it isn't is it? I obviously can apear sober when I have drunk, and what normal person would ask that of there daughter?

Having a very bad day, my youngest is 2 and she is, arr well no one needs to here me whine, the bottem line as you have gathered is, I drank to night, for an hour it was ok, now I am here?

Oh and my "family" i talk to my mum and one brother ocassionally, they have no idea what I am going through, i have talked to them about my drinking, they just tell me to cut down

gypsytears

Hi Saxony . I'm glad you're here. Doesn't matter if you drank... as far as I know it's not against the rules. You'll find lots of info and support if you hang around... I know I have. Been alcohol free almost 8 months now with the help of posting & reading here.

12 days is good... and you're NOT alone.

Anna

Hi Saxony,

I think it is just plain hard to get through early sobriety. I didn't have anyone to talk to either, when I stopped drinking. My family had had enough and didn't want to deal with me anymore and I was far too ashamed to talk to my friends. You can get through this. Learn from your mistakes and move forward. Plan ahead so that it won't happen next time. It does get easier with time.

Alive

you know better..you'll do better..

God always gives you a new start...isn't it wonderful to be able to start over..well you can..and nobody can tell you how to do it..you chose the best way for you...the best road...and with mistakes turned into learning you are gonna be fine..no doubt about it...why?..because i believe you..you are trying for a reason..because you are supposed to find peace...

take care

juliee

I know the feeling of being surrounded by people and yet feeling alone. It is a miserable feeling. Glad you are here....drinking or not you will find support and wisdom from the caring people at SR. I have 3 kids as well.....all grown now. My youngest is 18. I know your 3 girls will help you find the way to a better life. Keep posting.

Spiritual Seeker

Today is a new day. What is your plan for today.

Aysha

Did any of you know that grapefruit juice intensifies anxiety meds?
I didnt. I knew it had back effects or could kill you if drank with certain prescriptions. But I never knew anxiety meds intesifies the effects of it.
Knocked me on my ass last nite. Passed out fast.
Good side..I had a good night sleep..Nightmare free.for once.

Another question for all you out of USA people.
Ok we drive on the right.
And when we pass someone walking...It is just common to pass by on the right as well.
Ok..So since you all drive on the left. Is it the same when you walk by someone?
I know stupid question. But I wonder things like this sometimes.
Oh boy..tome to get back to work. LOL..

Room1

I want to stop now before my girls are affected, I don't want them to rememeber their childhood as some sad phase of their lives. My childhood was taken from me, I want my girls to be happy and I am the only one that can do that, it's such a tall order though :/ It is scarey, they are my world and I would do anything for them, but i sometimes feel like my mind is so damaged that I don't know what is for the best for them :s

i know no one probably understands that but I know what I mean x

IO Storm

Saxony..

I admire your concern for stopping before it damages your kids.

I didn't...and my eldest and i suffer estrangement because of it.

Welcome to SR...I know you will find the tools you need for

recovery.

Best Wishes!

Love,

IO

Spiritual Seeker

It is about more than just stopping the drinking. If you get into a Recovery program and learn a new way to live and get to the root of your addiction you may be able to break the cycle.

Rowan

Hi Saxony,

I'm glad that you posted and hope that you don't give up - please try again.

My girls are nearly 14 and 12 now - I haven't seen my eldest in 2 years. I never drank in front of them, that part was good, but they had to put up with the residual stufff - hangovers, depression, emotional absence. I was obsessed with the drink and couldn't wait for them to go to bed.

I understand how alone you feel - please keep reaching out and connecting here. It will get better. Even though I lost my eldest, I have faith that she will one day forgive me and come back. That helps me to stay sober a day at a time.

Big hugs,

Rowan

Aysha

Sry meant to make a new thread...LOl. WOW...