How do I "live" step 2?
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,056
Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
I feel like I live Step 2 every day when I go to an AA meeting. For months in early recovery I'd look around the room and see everyone smiling, hear the laughter and the talk. It made me so angry that God wouldn't give me that happiness. "Came to believe" are the key words for me. When I took Step 3, turned my will and my life over to a God of my understanding, I opened my heart and soul to the Fellowship of AA. I was surrounded by friends, people who loved me unconditionally. That's when my sanity slowly began to be restored.
I feel like I live Step 2 every day when I go to an AA meeting. For months in early recovery I'd look around the room and see everyone smiling, hear the laughter and the talk. It made me so angry that God wouldn't give me that happiness. "Came to believe" are the key words for me. When I took Step 3, turned my will and my life over to a God of my understanding, I opened my heart and soul to the Fellowship of AA. I was surrounded by friends, people who loved me unconditionally. That's when my sanity slowly began to be restored.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 3,812
By paying attention to the details of my life is how I came to believe, by watching others lives unfold, by watching nature and the natural ebb and flow...
When I step out of my head and pay attention I can see the sanity of life in general... If he can do that in all aspects of life.... he can do it for me if I ask and have faith.
When I step out of my head and pay attention I can see the sanity of life in general... If he can do that in all aspects of life.... he can do it for me if I ask and have faith.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: south east
Posts: 216
I am one of those stubborn types that step 2 'happens to' over and over again, lol, with regards to my behavior. But first I have to see my own insanity, usually by dropping myself into a big sticky mess.
JRock
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26
Step 2 for me comes in when I am again trying to manage my life(trying to drink). I usually have signs of this through the disturbances I encounter when taking my personal inventory on a regular basis. Once I can see the insanity of me trying to run my life, I then talk to my sponsor or someone else familiar with the recovery process, and then eventually wind up on my knees asking for God to save me cause I'm trying to drink again.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
There is an old saying in the rooms of AA that sums this process up for me very nicely:
Came
Came to
Came to Believe
I just posted this on another thread but it is equally applicable here.
Just remember this is a process,not a singular event.
Came
Came to
Came to Believe
I just posted this on another thread but it is equally applicable here.
Just remember this is a process,not a singular event.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 190
Step 2 is a statement, it only comes true with lasting effect by working 3-4-5-6-7-8-9- and by living 10-11-12.
I agree with mae164,
When the God Bomb went off in step 9 I came to believe ,so it is an experiential faith. I came to believe because something happened I cannot fathom, my state of being was changed and I was restored to sanity.
In step 2 I was only saying I was willing to believe, but I had no experience to base that belief on, nothing had actually changed ...yet.
Ditto step 3, just a decision but no action as yet.
Step 4 , illumination, realization .
Step 5, unburdening and more illumination, release.
And so on.
I agree with mae164,
When the God Bomb went off in step 9 I came to believe ,so it is an experiential faith. I came to believe because something happened I cannot fathom, my state of being was changed and I was restored to sanity.
In step 2 I was only saying I was willing to believe, but I had no experience to base that belief on, nothing had actually changed ...yet.
Ditto step 3, just a decision but no action as yet.
Step 4 , illumination, realization .
Step 5, unburdening and more illumination, release.
And so on.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 190
Originally Posted by jimhere 
Coming to believe is an ever evolving process.
Like has already been said, I first became conscious in the 9th Step. I had awakened to the Great Reality, entered the world of spirit. In other words, the here and now.
That is why I must not get stuck in concepts of God. The book uses the word conception, which is different. A concept is narrow, defined, and rigid. It has no room to grow. A conception, on the other hand is open-ended and has no limits. It starts off small, like the ideas about God that I had at first. But as I've grown, so has God. I have no need to comprehend or define it these days. The more I know God, the less I need to comprehend it or explain it. It's too big for that.
These days I am more interested in consciousness than conception.
Jim
Like has already been said, I first became conscious in the 9th Step. I had awakened to the Great Reality, entered the world of spirit. In other words, the here and now.
That is why I must not get stuck in concepts of God. The book uses the word conception, which is different. A concept is narrow, defined, and rigid. It has no room to grow. A conception, on the other hand is open-ended and has no limits. It starts off small, like the ideas about God that I had at first. But as I've grown, so has God. I have no need to comprehend or define it these days. The more I know God, the less I need to comprehend it or explain it. It's too big for that.
These days I am more interested in consciousness than conception.
Jim
Jim,
it helped me to to hear it was to be the God of my conception,
not a God of my invention.
That pretty well eliminated any clever ideas I had about light bulbs.
And a conception is based upon the attributes which are given in the Big Book for God, ie; All Powerfull, Infinite Love.
I still don;t know what God is, the best I can come up with is "not me".
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Pugetopolis
Posts: 2,384
Originally Posted by savoy
Jim,
it helped me to to hear it was to be the God of my conception,
not a God of my invention.
That pretty well eliminated any clever ideas I had about light bulbs.
And a conception is based upon the attributes which are given in the Big Book for God, ie; All Powerfull, Infinite Love.
I still don;t know what God is, the best I can come up with is "not me".
it helped me to to hear it was to be the God of my conception,
not a God of my invention.
That pretty well eliminated any clever ideas I had about light bulbs.
And a conception is based upon the attributes which are given in the Big Book for God, ie; All Powerfull, Infinite Love.
I still don;t know what God is, the best I can come up with is "not me".
These days I tend to view these attributes as not so much defining God, but defining my relationship to God. Like the Third Step idea-God is the director, God is the principal and I am the agent, and God is the father and I am the child-these define my relationship to God, but not so much define God.
Jim
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Cleveland Ohio
Posts: 290
I didn't overthink step 2. Step 2 for me was just an admission that something greater than me could do something. I didn't realize it so much at the time BUT it was a baby step towards believing that there was something greater than the great "ME." Now I realize that step 2 is a GOD reference but at the time it was simply a statement which I could not invalidate. I can't but it doesn't mean something/someone else couldn't. I admitted I wasn't the greatest.
Living step 2 for me is humility. I am not "all that." There is something out there greater than me. For me Step 2 is about perspective. For me step 2 wasn't about GOD it was just another step closer to finding him.
1... I admit failed and am failing still
2... hope. there must be something out there better than me that will suceed.
Living step 2 for me is humility. I am not "all that." There is something out there greater than me. For me Step 2 is about perspective. For me step 2 wasn't about GOD it was just another step closer to finding him.
1... I admit failed and am failing still
2... hope. there must be something out there better than me that will suceed.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: seattle
Posts: 468
hmmm...my first post musthave died in the crash??
Im with Debaucher...
Step 2 came after step one for me. Drinking at my problems, thats my main problem. Insanity, they say, is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. My way wasnt working. I admit it. Step 2 helped me to accept step one. Its insane to keep drinking at this point, and all of the attempts at control, moderation, managing it.. Failed. Over and over. The disease progressed.
Step 2 just cements my admission in step one. To drink again would be crazy. If I didnt drink, that was a "sane" alternative to not drinking. I "could" be restored to sanity, with regard to drinking. Others had, and assured me that i could recover too.
Im with Debaucher...
Step 2 came after step one for me. Drinking at my problems, thats my main problem. Insanity, they say, is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. My way wasnt working. I admit it. Step 2 helped me to accept step one. Its insane to keep drinking at this point, and all of the attempts at control, moderation, managing it.. Failed. Over and over. The disease progressed.
Step 2 just cements my admission in step one. To drink again would be crazy. If I didnt drink, that was a "sane" alternative to not drinking. I "could" be restored to sanity, with regard to drinking. Others had, and assured me that i could recover too.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: anomaly
Posts: 2,180
well..that's why they read the instructions over and over again.
you know...like if you were to put something together especailly
something you're not familar with..you read the instructions a couple of times
before you begin
anyhow..I don't think or belive you can fully understand something
that suppost be GOD. A conception is just that..I'm leaving it open
and willing. A concept..will that's like a box with perimeters.
anyway, it's not that complicate , just read step #11.
obviousely..there's room to grow, or bascailly maybe, maybe
just a maybe...I'm not suppost to even grasp GOD at step #2.
It's bacailly telling me even at that piont I'm not going to fully grasp it.
Seriousely..it's not that complicate..How the hell can grasp
anything from FRYING my BRAIN CELLS for years, and years.lol
Came to belive to be restored to sanity..
I don't know...I belive the sun is going to shine tommorow,
but I'm still not 100% sure of it. i don't know..a big ass rock
can hit this planet tommorow for all I know.
you know...like if you were to put something together especailly
something you're not familar with..you read the instructions a couple of times
before you begin
anyhow..I don't think or belive you can fully understand something
that suppost be GOD. A conception is just that..I'm leaving it open
and willing. A concept..will that's like a box with perimeters.
anyway, it's not that complicate , just read step #11.
obviousely..there's room to grow, or bascailly maybe, maybe
just a maybe...I'm not suppost to even grasp GOD at step #2.
It's bacailly telling me even at that piont I'm not going to fully grasp it.
Seriousely..it's not that complicate..How the hell can grasp
anything from FRYING my BRAIN CELLS for years, and years.lol
Came to belive to be restored to sanity..
I don't know...I belive the sun is going to shine tommorow,
but I'm still not 100% sure of it. i don't know..a big ass rock
can hit this planet tommorow for all I know.
Last edited by SaTiT; 12-04-2007 at 07:09 AM.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 190
Originally Posted by Aa_vark
Step 2 just cements my admission in step one. To drink again would be crazy. If I didnt drink, that was a "sane" alternative to not drinking. I "could" be restored to sanity, with regard to drinking. Others had, and assured me that i could recover too.
Later on in the inventory though.....I discovered I was more insane than I could imagine. The 'thing' that had control over my thinking and doing (causes and conditions) was about to destroy me.
A woman (not an alcoholic) told me this and it helped "ego cannot handle failure, actually it can't success either, but its not supposed to be in a position to handle anything, so when it takes over control of a mind it will destroy it....because it "thinks" its going to die if it loses control."
Being insane, the ego's solution is to kill the patient.
In the Big Book it refers to King Alcohol and my being a denizen of its mad realm, its ego.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: seattle
Posts: 468
Originally Posted by savoy
Thats how I was able to accept the insanity too.
Later on in the inventory though.....I discovered I was more insane than I could imagine. The 'thing' that had control over my thinking and doing (causes and conditions) was about to destroy me.
Later on in the inventory though.....I discovered I was more insane than I could imagine. The 'thing' that had control over my thinking and doing (causes and conditions) was about to destroy me.
Best way "I" can deal with that is to keep moving to moral inventory, and figure out where "I" was to blame for my part of the misery and wreckage.
Originally Posted by savoy
Being insane, the ego's solution is to kill the patient.
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