Violet Brown

Incase anyone is wondering, my AH returned from his 5 day binge in the middle of the night, replete with quackings of "I'm done with that stuff" and "I'm never disappearing again" etc etc etc. He's sleeping it off upstairs. Grrrrrrrrrr.

I'm not going grocery shopping again until he takes off again (probably in two days' time.) We can eat at McDonalds until then! I can't stand buying groceries and having him eat them all!

Okay, I guess that was an update and a vent.

teke

sounds like something i commited to doing when my rah was active. don't know if it was the right thing to do, but i felt like i had to look out for me and the kids, so i did the same as you. sorry but i figured that if he got hungry enough, that he'd think about putting a few of his doc dollars aside for his own food. it helped me to at least be more able to feed the kids.

i think that you are doing what you have to do for you. keeping you and him in my prayers and i pray that he finds his way soon.

hope213

he's had his party for the time being... yea, let him take you out to eat. take care of you & remember hands off the addict.hugs,

BigSis

Actually, it sounds like you are taking care of you... minding that you are spending your money on what YOU want. That is a boundary, in my book.

I started out with little boundaries and as I got stronger and learned more, I made a little stronger ones... when I was ready.

(((Hugs))))

Violet Brown

To be honest half of me hopes he'll discover the kitchen is pretty empty (I'd planned to buy groceries today) and decide to leave. Not that I want him using, but I'm at a point where I'm happier when he's away than when he's here. He's just so disruptive - when he's not here I can usually put him out of my mind.

I told him I didn't want him here - that he had to go stay some place else. I tell him this every time he comes home, and of course he replies with "But I have nowhere to go..." To which I always reply "well you've been someplace for the past (2, 3, 5) days, why don't you just go there!" His answer is that he's "gonna quit for good this time" and can't possibly quit at a crackhouse. I tell him to go to the detox centre if he wants to quit and he doesn't have an answer for that. But he's still here, sleeping and I have no idea how to make him leave.

Blackrose2756

Your are right...where has he been. Mine had no place to go, but since he was on probation, threatening to call the cops got him out. He didn't want a drug test taken. Yep, I heard the same thing a hunder times or more. But I also hear No addict every woke up in their bedroom, with food in the kitchen & a roof over their head & said...."I think I'll go to rehab...it's such a great day".

Lynne

Violet Brown

LOL ... So true.

dollydo

As long as you let him come back and crash, he'll never leave, why should he.
He can go use for days and have a soft place to land, and then go do it again.

You have your own reasons for letting him in, over and over again. It is your choice, and I do not sit in judgement of your decision to do that.

Me, I'd change the locks, toss his stuff out, and let the chips fall where they may.

Nothing changes, if nothing changes.

My Best,

Dolly

patchoulli

what is it with the grocery thing. For months I bought all the groceries too. I used to resent the heck out of it, feeling that the idiot had to eat. At that time I just thought he was really bad with money, didn't realize he was really using crack...He would not eat for a few days and then he would eat all night, any and everything...How do they justify the fact that they are not contributing?...sorry, just a rant, I hate addiction