Slava

I have seen it all, i am sure this this the last story of pain and suffering u want to hear.Some ppl feel better by reading about other ppl problems. I did lots of drugs, making a 100g a year not only get u high , overdose most of the times. When u can't feel heroin no more, because dose 2 high, u start to speed ball. next thing u know, 5 years gone by or bye bye. Living on the street with junkies who will rot u out to cops and stab u for a bag of dope.Got coded twice naltrexzone almost made commit suicide same number of times. The world relaps is stupid word, THERE'S NO EX JUNKIES. U live from dose to dose, damn if the guy who wrote "the million little pieces only new".I am on the methadone, the dose is mad crazy, i sleep all day, trying to stay clean, but depression is a bitch, just need advice:Well to the point , i am on 110mg on methadone, any advise on how to tamper with it so i could lower my dose without feeling affects of it. thanks.

vtlady

"i sleep all day, trying to stay clean,
What is it that you do to try and stay clean besides "sleep all day?" Do you get up in the morning go dose go back home and into bed?
What is it you do to try to help yourself?
Forgive me for saying this but the 1st thing you need to do is wake up and get off the pity-pot. SR is full of people with addictions, full of people who are struggling to get clean and stay clean by working a program and reaching out to others in need. Have you tried this? I suggest that your read more posts here maybe then you will realize that your statement "THERE'S NO EX JUNKIES" is something you have in your head that you refuse to let go of.
I'm sorry if I offend anybody here reading today but everyday I read the posts here and although I don't know the people who post personally. I have come to respect and admire them for what they go through each day without giving up. Recovery doesn't come easy but it does come.