Suboxone owns me
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 7
Suboxone owns me
I am a 34 year old female. I am a teacher and I also work part-time at CVS. I have to in order to afford my addiction. I am married and have a 2 year old and a 9 year old. My addiction started when I had my wisdom teeth pulled and a week later suffered a major 3rd degree burn. I took pain pills so long I just couldn't stop. I am leading a double life as respected teacher and drug addict. Sadly, my husband and I are both addicts. In order to improve our lives, my husband started attending a suboxone clinic 2 years ago. We had no idea at the time that it would only make our lives worse. It was way cheaper to by lortabs off the street than attend this clinic. We are spending close to 1 thousand dollars a month to maintain our suboxone addiction. Wow, that's a lot of money. I have hit rock bottom because I'm so broke. I choose paying for suboxone over buying my kids shoes and things they need. I'm in so much debt, I seriously doubt I can crawl out of it. Needless to say I'm ready to be clean but don't know if I'm strong enough to get there. I tapered myself down from 8 mg a day to 2 mg every other day. I have done this for 1 week now. Here in lies my problem. I suffer so much on my sub free days. Leg cramps, anxiety, hot/cold flashes, and no sleep. I feel as if all I can think of is taking a sub to feel better. It's horrible. I have been taking vitamins, exercising, and sleeping pills. I have to continue my routine of working 2 jobs, caring for my kids, and pretending that everything is normal, even though I'm miserable. I am a godly person and believe my faith can carry me a long way, but I don't know how much longer I can keep going. Like this. I wish I could be put in a coma till all this s*** is out of my system. I am so angry at myself for becoming this person whose life revolves around a little orange tablet. I own my home and both vehicles and I make pretty good money, but I have never been as broke as I am right now, and it scares the crap out of me. I deserve better, my children deserve better, and my marriage deserves better. I'm tired of working all the time and missing out on quality time with my children just so I can support this habit. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 304
You have the right head start going. Tapered some and want your life and money back.
Have you talked to your doctor about your plans, and a taper schedule. Sounds to me like your tapering a bit too much too quickly, throwing you into very uncomfortable w/d symptoms vs. manageable, able to live with w/d's until the drug is out of your system.
Sub's are maintenance meds. Taken only when necessary. Talk to your doctor about this. I'm sure he/she can help you tremendously. Best to you in your recovery. FYI another poster on S/R ( IronMaiden ) has a blog summarizing her day by day, getting off sub's.
She's on day 5 now. Might want to check that out as well.
I personally am on a long slow taper.25-.50 mgs skipping up to several days
Have you talked to your doctor about your plans, and a taper schedule. Sounds to me like your tapering a bit too much too quickly, throwing you into very uncomfortable w/d symptoms vs. manageable, able to live with w/d's until the drug is out of your system.
Sub's are maintenance meds. Taken only when necessary. Talk to your doctor about this. I'm sure he/she can help you tremendously. Best to you in your recovery. FYI another poster on S/R ( IronMaiden ) has a blog summarizing her day by day, getting off sub's.
She's on day 5 now. Might want to check that out as well.
I personally am on a long slow taper.25-.50 mgs skipping up to several days
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 7
I am determined. Yesterday I took my 2 mg and it made me nervous, sick to my tummy, and very antsy. I figure I'm taking too much on my every other day method, but it's hard to cut those little strips into much more than fourths. I'm gonna cut the fourth in half next and that should equate to 1 mg every other day. I know I can do this. I may have to string my tapering method out until I'm off 2 weeks at Christmas and then jump off the wagon. Thanks to everyone who responded and good luck to us all
Resident Alien
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 198
I jumped from 1 mg/day, but I had been at that dose for a few months beforehand... my whole thing is chronicled on my blog, and IronMaiden as Ollie mentioned is a week into her kick by now. But I would second talking to your doc about a taper plan. Going to fast can be uncomfortable for sure.
It can be done! You can do it too when you're ready. :o)
Tomorrow will be 2 months off suboxone & opiate free for me!
It can be done! You can do it too when you're ready. :o)
Tomorrow will be 2 months off suboxone & opiate free for me!
sobriety date 5-2-12
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
What have you done towards recovery? Do you see a therapist, NA, outpatient rehab?
I'm of the mindset of going cold turkey. Cold turkey from opiates won't kill you and while it is uncomfortable, it doesn't last forever. I found weaning to be worse- it was easier for me to take none at all than to taper.
Your kids deserve a clean mom. I hope you can give them that.
I'm of the mindset of going cold turkey. Cold turkey from opiates won't kill you and while it is uncomfortable, it doesn't last forever. I found weaning to be worse- it was easier for me to take none at all than to taper.
Your kids deserve a clean mom. I hope you can give them that.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: parkersburg, wv
Posts: 178
That is what helped get me clean believe it or not-The fact that I had to admit that my DOC-opiates owned me. I resented paying thousands a month for my habit. I resented putting money in the drug dealers, pharmaceutical companies and even doctors pockets.-That anger got me through withdrawl-I went cold turkey after at least a decade long addiction.-Then I had to start working over recovery.
I just really get what you are saying-I am the Mom of a 5,7 and 9 year old. No one knew I was an addict-I kept it hidden for many years. I finally got so fed up with the whole mess that being sick was worth it to me to get through it. Don't let anything own you. My life got great again within months of getting clean and staying clean. You can do this!
I just really get what you are saying-I am the Mom of a 5,7 and 9 year old. No one knew I was an addict-I kept it hidden for many years. I finally got so fed up with the whole mess that being sick was worth it to me to get through it. Don't let anything own you. My life got great again within months of getting clean and staying clean. You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Warwcik, RI
Posts: 2
Why I believe you must get off Suboxone NOW.
I tell the following story so that you may experience an infusion of the belief-by-example that YOU can get off Suboxone (and you MUST! You must get of it NOW!).
Disclaimer: I accept and understand that these are my own personal experiences, my own personal opinions about Suboxone. I HATE IT! But maybe I've got it all wrong. Maybe Suboxone IS the Second Coming. But I don't think so. Here's why. (And, here's what many docs did not tell me about Suboxone's effect on the brain.)
I'll do my best to make this short and (not-so) sweet.
I started taking opiates at 18 years old. Doesn't matter why. Continued flat-out, balls-to-the-wall for 43 years. Finally couldn't take it anymore at age sixty-one. Started losing my mind (and a lot of other things.) Went to clinic. Got methadone. Methadone sucks! Stopped the Methadone. Went immedeately into Major-Horror-Show, God-please-kill-me withdrawal. I simply could NOT do it. Went immediately to best addiciton clinic in the area. The top Doc there put me on Suboxone, highest dose, 32 mgs. Doc said I would likely have to take that for the rest of my life. (Which might be how long anyway? I asked him.) He said, because of my over four decades of full-bore opiates abuse, it was likely my brain would never re-set if I tried to get off Suboxone. Told me that the withdrawal could possibly last six months to a year. (What?) Okay, well . . . I'm in. Gimme all the Suboxone you got.
The 32 mgs. that he gave me did not do the job. The doctors all tell me that this is not possible. It can't be so, say the docs, because 32 mgs bathes all your receptors and you MUST be okay now! (Oh really? Well then, I must have grown 800 trillion new receptors inside my head because IT'S NOT WORKING!)
I went to another clinic (away), got a second script for 32mgs. Started taking 64 mgs. per day. Okay. All righty now. Life is finally getting Ginger Peachy again. Yes! I am fine and I can go back to the business of getting even older and eventually falling apart and finally dying in peace. (What? Why am I thinking like this after only a few months on Suboxone. I thought Suboxone was supposed to make me ALL okay again?) Well, okay, it's not really supposed to do all THAT, but I do have my life back, right? And I do LOVE Suboxone for what it's done for me, right?
Wrong.
(Of course, after that second script ran out, I had to come back down to 32 mgs. Not too bad, but not fun. I admitted my double-script deception to my Doc. He was not happy, but what's he gonna do? He then tells me AGAIN that Suboxone does nothing for you after 32 mgs. But my brain is telling me different. My brain is telling me he is wrong.
(By the way, some docs are wrong about a lot of other stuff when it comes to Suboxone.)
After about two-and-a-half to three years into my 32 mgs. per day, here's me thinking my life is normal. Yes, ain't life grand. I'm back to normal. I am normal. My life is normal.
But it is NOT normal, it is only ARTIFICIAL Normal.
It finally dawns on me that my mind, my sex drive, my memory (I'll prove later that this had nothing to do with my age), my feelings of love for my family and friends, my feelings of well-being, and my occassional feelings of JOY about being alive--these feeelings are all out of whack. They are all FALSE feelings. They are shallow, false feelings. They are not DEEP feelings. Suboxone has manifested these shallow feelings FOR me. My own brain did not do this for me, my own endorphons did not-Suboxone did it.
I suddenly realize that my TRUE life is over unless I can somehow reverse this. I need a miracle.
(Speaking of miracles: in my experienece, most addiciton docs do not allow for the possibility of these rare moments and occurences of absolute perfection.)
Okay. So. I was on Suboxone, max dose, for five years, (after 43 years of opiate addiction and abuse).
I made up my mind. Get off Suboxone or die.
A year and half ago, I began titrating down from the 32 mgs. Slowly. Also began fortifying my body with vitamins, supplements, and better foods. Bought a VitaMix and made healthy food smoothies. Intensified exercise. Lost 20 pounds. Got in the best shape of my last twenty years . . . then I went for it. (First, I found a different addiction doc who would fully support my getting off.)
A year and a half ago, when I dropped below 6 mgs. per day for the first time, I started going into withdrawal every morning. But that was manageable because once I took my first dose at noontime, it went away. Like I said: for a year and a half, every morning, withdrawal, which sucks, but noontime all is well again in the world.
After that year and a half titrating, finally worked my way down to 1/4 mg. per day then . . . the Universe collapsed onto me. I've been through other withdrawals--alcohol, opiates, Methadone, etc--but never anything as diabolical as this. Horror on an epic scale. Aliens invading my body, trying peel me apart, cell by cell. Certainly, someone must have plugged a9-Volt battery into each of my limbs. The sheer gravity of the planet was trying to disassemble me. My own body was trying to unmake itself. My own body abandoned me. My own body wanted me to die.
20 days ago, Aug 31st, I stopped. Zero. Since then . . . well, I have no words. Okay, one word: worse.
BUT, every day I go to my mirror, and I look myself in the eye, and I YELL at myself (sometimes I have to SCREAM) that I will NEVER go through this again, and that I deserve to have a NATURAL Normal life, not an artifical one just like anyone else, even if my life only lasts another five or ten or fifteen years. Or only one.
I am a human being and I deserve this. 66 years ago two human beings made me and now I deserve this. How do I gaurantee myself that I can make it through this, even if it takes another six months? (It will NOT take another six months. In my opinion, that was a lie.) Simple. I need only make it through this one, painful day. Today. Only today. Or maybe this hour. Or this minute. I KNOW I can do another minute of this suffering and this pain. I KNOW, because after 20 days clean (and don't forget--this is after 48 years of opiates) I feel a little BETTER than I did 20 days ago. That means it's working. That means that one day my brain will re-learn how to make its own endorphins. I belive it's beginning to already. I believe much of what was told me was wrong. I believe its better to fight for life than to suffer for NOT-life.
Okay. I'm sorry. I did not keep it short. I guess I don't know how to do anything small.
But, here's the crux of it ALL--here's the tipping point of my story. If I can do this (and I CAN) then I believe anyone can dig deep inside themselves and find the strength, the anger, the madness, the molten lava, the VILE CONTEMPT for what drugs have done to them (to us ALL), and they can make it through one day of the horror.
Last (and perhaps most important) point. I believe Suboxone is a seriously flawed drug, based upon a seriously flawed concept: that it is somehow acceptable for people to settle into a constant state of "being" that I call Artificial Normal. It's NOT acceptable, because Suboxone is doing something abnormal to our brains. It's telling us that we're finally okay, that the suffering is finally over. But we're not okay. And the suffering has only begun.
I pray that you may find your anger, your madness, your molten lava, your VILE CONTEMPT for what drugs have done to you. I pray that you will choose Life, over Artifical Life.
MysteryWriter
Disclaimer: I accept and understand that these are my own personal experiences, my own personal opinions about Suboxone. I HATE IT! But maybe I've got it all wrong. Maybe Suboxone IS the Second Coming. But I don't think so. Here's why. (And, here's what many docs did not tell me about Suboxone's effect on the brain.)
I'll do my best to make this short and (not-so) sweet.
I started taking opiates at 18 years old. Doesn't matter why. Continued flat-out, balls-to-the-wall for 43 years. Finally couldn't take it anymore at age sixty-one. Started losing my mind (and a lot of other things.) Went to clinic. Got methadone. Methadone sucks! Stopped the Methadone. Went immedeately into Major-Horror-Show, God-please-kill-me withdrawal. I simply could NOT do it. Went immediately to best addiciton clinic in the area. The top Doc there put me on Suboxone, highest dose, 32 mgs. Doc said I would likely have to take that for the rest of my life. (Which might be how long anyway? I asked him.) He said, because of my over four decades of full-bore opiates abuse, it was likely my brain would never re-set if I tried to get off Suboxone. Told me that the withdrawal could possibly last six months to a year. (What?) Okay, well . . . I'm in. Gimme all the Suboxone you got.
The 32 mgs. that he gave me did not do the job. The doctors all tell me that this is not possible. It can't be so, say the docs, because 32 mgs bathes all your receptors and you MUST be okay now! (Oh really? Well then, I must have grown 800 trillion new receptors inside my head because IT'S NOT WORKING!)
I went to another clinic (away), got a second script for 32mgs. Started taking 64 mgs. per day. Okay. All righty now. Life is finally getting Ginger Peachy again. Yes! I am fine and I can go back to the business of getting even older and eventually falling apart and finally dying in peace. (What? Why am I thinking like this after only a few months on Suboxone. I thought Suboxone was supposed to make me ALL okay again?) Well, okay, it's not really supposed to do all THAT, but I do have my life back, right? And I do LOVE Suboxone for what it's done for me, right?
Wrong.
(Of course, after that second script ran out, I had to come back down to 32 mgs. Not too bad, but not fun. I admitted my double-script deception to my Doc. He was not happy, but what's he gonna do? He then tells me AGAIN that Suboxone does nothing for you after 32 mgs. But my brain is telling me different. My brain is telling me he is wrong.
(By the way, some docs are wrong about a lot of other stuff when it comes to Suboxone.)
After about two-and-a-half to three years into my 32 mgs. per day, here's me thinking my life is normal. Yes, ain't life grand. I'm back to normal. I am normal. My life is normal.
But it is NOT normal, it is only ARTIFICIAL Normal.
It finally dawns on me that my mind, my sex drive, my memory (I'll prove later that this had nothing to do with my age), my feelings of love for my family and friends, my feelings of well-being, and my occassional feelings of JOY about being alive--these feeelings are all out of whack. They are all FALSE feelings. They are shallow, false feelings. They are not DEEP feelings. Suboxone has manifested these shallow feelings FOR me. My own brain did not do this for me, my own endorphons did not-Suboxone did it.
I suddenly realize that my TRUE life is over unless I can somehow reverse this. I need a miracle.
(Speaking of miracles: in my experienece, most addiciton docs do not allow for the possibility of these rare moments and occurences of absolute perfection.)
Okay. So. I was on Suboxone, max dose, for five years, (after 43 years of opiate addiction and abuse).
I made up my mind. Get off Suboxone or die.
A year and half ago, I began titrating down from the 32 mgs. Slowly. Also began fortifying my body with vitamins, supplements, and better foods. Bought a VitaMix and made healthy food smoothies. Intensified exercise. Lost 20 pounds. Got in the best shape of my last twenty years . . . then I went for it. (First, I found a different addiction doc who would fully support my getting off.)
A year and a half ago, when I dropped below 6 mgs. per day for the first time, I started going into withdrawal every morning. But that was manageable because once I took my first dose at noontime, it went away. Like I said: for a year and a half, every morning, withdrawal, which sucks, but noontime all is well again in the world.
After that year and a half titrating, finally worked my way down to 1/4 mg. per day then . . . the Universe collapsed onto me. I've been through other withdrawals--alcohol, opiates, Methadone, etc--but never anything as diabolical as this. Horror on an epic scale. Aliens invading my body, trying peel me apart, cell by cell. Certainly, someone must have plugged a9-Volt battery into each of my limbs. The sheer gravity of the planet was trying to disassemble me. My own body was trying to unmake itself. My own body abandoned me. My own body wanted me to die.
20 days ago, Aug 31st, I stopped. Zero. Since then . . . well, I have no words. Okay, one word: worse.
BUT, every day I go to my mirror, and I look myself in the eye, and I YELL at myself (sometimes I have to SCREAM) that I will NEVER go through this again, and that I deserve to have a NATURAL Normal life, not an artifical one just like anyone else, even if my life only lasts another five or ten or fifteen years. Or only one.
I am a human being and I deserve this. 66 years ago two human beings made me and now I deserve this. How do I gaurantee myself that I can make it through this, even if it takes another six months? (It will NOT take another six months. In my opinion, that was a lie.) Simple. I need only make it through this one, painful day. Today. Only today. Or maybe this hour. Or this minute. I KNOW I can do another minute of this suffering and this pain. I KNOW, because after 20 days clean (and don't forget--this is after 48 years of opiates) I feel a little BETTER than I did 20 days ago. That means it's working. That means that one day my brain will re-learn how to make its own endorphins. I belive it's beginning to already. I believe much of what was told me was wrong. I believe its better to fight for life than to suffer for NOT-life.
Okay. I'm sorry. I did not keep it short. I guess I don't know how to do anything small.
But, here's the crux of it ALL--here's the tipping point of my story. If I can do this (and I CAN) then I believe anyone can dig deep inside themselves and find the strength, the anger, the madness, the molten lava, the VILE CONTEMPT for what drugs have done to them (to us ALL), and they can make it through one day of the horror.
Last (and perhaps most important) point. I believe Suboxone is a seriously flawed drug, based upon a seriously flawed concept: that it is somehow acceptable for people to settle into a constant state of "being" that I call Artificial Normal. It's NOT acceptable, because Suboxone is doing something abnormal to our brains. It's telling us that we're finally okay, that the suffering is finally over. But we're not okay. And the suffering has only begun.
I pray that you may find your anger, your madness, your molten lava, your VILE CONTEMPT for what drugs have done to you. I pray that you will choose Life, over Artifical Life.
MysteryWriter
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Buffalo,NY
Posts: 4
The title of this thread peaked my interest to respond for this is the reason I went searching for some help.
Being new to this forum for about oh 5 minutes, I think maybe I should disclose a little fact about myself. I am a slave to suboxone. Its the first thing I take in the morning and the last thing I worry about before bed.
Ive been taking Suboxone for 2+ years. Previous to that, I was addicted to opiods for 5 years and before that an addict of everything under the sun. A friend introduced me to Suboxone when I was starting to have some physical side effects from taking too many opiods, as well as my personal life began to suffer. It was my miracle drug. It got me off the tabs, oxys, perks, and whatever other opiod I had been taking. I had no withdrawls, no side effects, and best NO CRAVINGS FOR OPIODS. But that was at first, I slipped up a few times and relapsed. I had enrolled in a outpatient rehab and was en route to success when my health insurance lapsed and refused to cover my treatment. Thats when I fell off even more. I would alternate between opiods and street suboxone before finally just taking suboxone. Its been 2+years like I said, and I STILL cannot get off the suboxone. Ive tried everything, and just when It gets rough being off, I go right back on. Its not the physical hold of suboxone that gets you, its the MENTAL and EMOTIONAL strong hold that grips the tightest. Im sick of worrying where my next dose will come from, Im sick of the grip it has on me.....I just want to become normal and free....
I sympathize with anyone trying to get off suboxone, well off anything for that matter. This is because I understand and I know that trials and tribulations one must go through. I welcome any helpful hints and tips to getting off this stuff because so far, Ive been unsuccessful.
Its a long hard road out of hell.....
Being new to this forum for about oh 5 minutes, I think maybe I should disclose a little fact about myself. I am a slave to suboxone. Its the first thing I take in the morning and the last thing I worry about before bed.
Ive been taking Suboxone for 2+ years. Previous to that, I was addicted to opiods for 5 years and before that an addict of everything under the sun. A friend introduced me to Suboxone when I was starting to have some physical side effects from taking too many opiods, as well as my personal life began to suffer. It was my miracle drug. It got me off the tabs, oxys, perks, and whatever other opiod I had been taking. I had no withdrawls, no side effects, and best NO CRAVINGS FOR OPIODS. But that was at first, I slipped up a few times and relapsed. I had enrolled in a outpatient rehab and was en route to success when my health insurance lapsed and refused to cover my treatment. Thats when I fell off even more. I would alternate between opiods and street suboxone before finally just taking suboxone. Its been 2+years like I said, and I STILL cannot get off the suboxone. Ive tried everything, and just when It gets rough being off, I go right back on. Its not the physical hold of suboxone that gets you, its the MENTAL and EMOTIONAL strong hold that grips the tightest. Im sick of worrying where my next dose will come from, Im sick of the grip it has on me.....I just want to become normal and free....
I sympathize with anyone trying to get off suboxone, well off anything for that matter. This is because I understand and I know that trials and tribulations one must go through. I welcome any helpful hints and tips to getting off this stuff because so far, Ive been unsuccessful.
Its a long hard road out of hell.....
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: blaine, tn
Posts: 4
Originally Posted by Trace04210625 
I am a 34 year old female. I am a teacher and I also work part-time at CVS. I have to in order to afford my addiction. I am married and have a 2 year old and a 9 year old. My addiction started when I had my wisdom teeth pulled and a week later suffered a major 3rd degree burn. I took pain pills so long I just couldn't stop. I am leading a double life as respected teacher and drug addict. Sadly, my husband and I are both addicts. In order to improve our lives, my husband started attending a suboxone clinic 2 years ago. We had no idea at the time that it would only make our lives worse. It was way cheaper to by lortabs off the street than attend this clinic. We are spending close to 1 thousand dollars a month to maintain our suboxone addiction. Wow, that's a lot of money. I have hit rock bottom because I'm so broke. I choose paying for suboxone over buying my kids shoes and things they need. I'm in so much debt, I seriously doubt I can crawl out of it. Needless to say I'm ready to be clean but don't know if I'm strong enough to get there. I tapered myself down from 8 mg a day to 2 mg every other day. I have done this for 1 week now. Here in lies my problem. I suffer so much on my sub free days. Leg cramps, anxiety, hot/cold flashes, and no sleep. I feel as if all I can think of is taking a sub to feel better. It's horrible. I have been taking vitamins, exercising, and sleeping pills. I have to continue my routine of working 2 jobs, caring for my kids, and pretending that everything is normal, even though I'm miserable. I am a godly person and believe my faith can carry me a long way, but I don't know how much longer I can keep going. Like this. I wish I could be put in a coma till all this s*** is out of my system. I am so angry at myself for becoming this person whose life revolves around a little orange tablet. I own my home and both vehicles and I make pretty good money, but I have never been as broke as I am right now, and it scares the crap out of me. I deserve better, my children deserve better, and my marriage deserves better. I'm tired of working all the time and missing out on quality time with my children just so I can support this habit. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 7
I totally know where you are coming from. I have actually thought about quitting my job so I can be normal again. I fear I am in a downward spiral not heading anywhere. Actually I don't feel bc this lil orange pill has taken my emotions and warped them. I am not the person I was and everyone around me knows it. It's horrible. I don't know if I will make it. I have made 2 strips last me over a week taking lil pieces at a time and now I'm out. Mornings are the worst bc I don't feel like I can get going till I take some suboxone. Guess we will see what happens over the next week.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: parkersburg, wv
Posts: 178
Heroin was first legalized and was used to get soldiers in the US off of Morphine. Everyone thought they found a wonder drug-Soldiers were no longer addicted to Morphine. Yay. Then about a decade later they found slews of veterans and people now addicted to Heroin-And we know the rest of that story.
So then they come up with Methadone and Subs-But are you addicted to those? Replacing one addiction for another. I have been to conference after conference on the wonderful benefits of Subs. Yes, it does promote legal behavior and when used correctly you avoid any risk of overdose, criminal behavior, etc-So that is definitely a positive. But are you still addicted? Your life is being controlled by a substance, day in and day out. I do believe that opiate addicts minds can be healed-I know it can! Maybe its a miracle to some, chemical make-up to others..but it can be done-but it takes time! You are going to feel "flat" for a while-long past the withdrawl phase. Your brain has to be retrained naturally-I think that is when alot of addicts cave because even though they got through withdrawl they don't feel "normal" yet.
In my opinion..it's all about the money. Subs and Methadone clinics are a cash cow. Yes they are legal, but particularly with Subs, it's too early to see the long term ramifications. Just my opinion.
So then they come up with Methadone and Subs-But are you addicted to those? Replacing one addiction for another. I have been to conference after conference on the wonderful benefits of Subs. Yes, it does promote legal behavior and when used correctly you avoid any risk of overdose, criminal behavior, etc-So that is definitely a positive. But are you still addicted? Your life is being controlled by a substance, day in and day out. I do believe that opiate addicts minds can be healed-I know it can! Maybe its a miracle to some, chemical make-up to others..but it can be done-but it takes time! You are going to feel "flat" for a while-long past the withdrawl phase. Your brain has to be retrained naturally-I think that is when alot of addicts cave because even though they got through withdrawl they don't feel "normal" yet.
In my opinion..it's all about the money. Subs and Methadone clinics are a cash cow. Yes they are legal, but particularly with Subs, it's too early to see the long term ramifications. Just my opinion.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 2,258
I am also a teacher, and a mom, and a recovering addict. I am here for you. Best thing I can recommend is get help, and fast! I was exactly where you were 8 months ago, broke, addicted, in my shame core, unhappy, tired, and sick and tired of focusing my entire life around a stupid pill.
This can be done. YOU can change your life right now for the better. You can go to a FREE NA meeting every single night, you can take a week or 2 off of work. I say move quick, clean up, and I know you dread the sickness, but it gets better. It will only be worse the longer you prolong it. I think you and your hubby both need to be in NA asap for those kids!!!!!!!!!
Hang in there, we are here for you. This is my first time coming on here, as I post in Substance Abuse. I will come back to check though.
This can be done. YOU can change your life right now for the better. You can go to a FREE NA meeting every single night, you can take a week or 2 off of work. I say move quick, clean up, and I know you dread the sickness, but it gets better. It will only be worse the longer you prolong it. I think you and your hubby both need to be in NA asap for those kids!!!!!!!!!
Hang in there, we are here for you. This is my first time coming on here, as I post in Substance Abuse. I will come back to check though.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 1
Sub
Hello,
I have never posted here but felt like I needed to. Tapering is the best thing anyone can do to get of suboxone. I myself have been on suboxone for 5 years. I'm so scared of the withdrawals that I just continue taking it. I've never had two weeks free to just deal with the pain. Recently I have gotten down to .75mg & I'm jumping next month. Any one can get off of suboxone but they have to be determined to get off of it. I never felt the motivation to get off of it until now. I do wonder why someone pays 1,000 dollars a month for suboxone. I go to a suboxone doctor that I found on suboxone & he prescribes suboxone for me for 3 months. My doctors visit is $100 & then he gave me a card so my prescriptions are free. So I end up only paying $100 for a 3 months supply of films that could last me forever. Why are y'all going to clinics instead of getting prescriptions? I know clinics rip you off. I realize some people dont have insurance like I do but even my friend who doesnt have insurance doesnt pay close to that. The doctor gives her the free prescription card also. I am serious about my recovery so I have never taken more than what I've needed. If y'all have to be on Suboxone for a bit longer rethink the way you're getting them! This would allow you to taper better & not be so stressed about money. Good luck!
I have never posted here but felt like I needed to. Tapering is the best thing anyone can do to get of suboxone. I myself have been on suboxone for 5 years. I'm so scared of the withdrawals that I just continue taking it. I've never had two weeks free to just deal with the pain. Recently I have gotten down to .75mg & I'm jumping next month. Any one can get off of suboxone but they have to be determined to get off of it. I never felt the motivation to get off of it until now. I do wonder why someone pays 1,000 dollars a month for suboxone. I go to a suboxone doctor that I found on suboxone & he prescribes suboxone for me for 3 months. My doctors visit is $100 & then he gave me a card so my prescriptions are free. So I end up only paying $100 for a 3 months supply of films that could last me forever. Why are y'all going to clinics instead of getting prescriptions? I know clinics rip you off. I realize some people dont have insurance like I do but even my friend who doesnt have insurance doesnt pay close to that. The doctor gives her the free prescription card also. I am serious about my recovery so I have never taken more than what I've needed. If y'all have to be on Suboxone for a bit longer rethink the way you're getting them! This would allow you to taper better & not be so stressed about money. Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 13
I tapered down and then went thru dts for a few days. At that point It was a must for me to get off of the suboxin so I just decided to go through with it and get off. I feel much, much better that I am off of the subs. It is amazing how much better I felt after. God does not give us more than we can handle! You can do it!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: grand rapids, michigan
Posts: 3
awesome!!
linz
your right God is beyond awesome and gives us only what we can bear and only with his help can we have gone through detox of suboxone... question for you how long did it take you to get through the detox. for me it was about three weeks. I still have some bad days of body aches. I know I will have bad days I just need to take the good with the bad..
mark
your right God is beyond awesome and gives us only what we can bear and only with his help can we have gone through detox of suboxone... question for you how long did it take you to get through the detox. for me it was about three weeks. I still have some bad days of body aches. I know I will have bad days I just need to take the good with the bad..
mark
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Myrtle Beach, SC
Posts: 19
Thank you so much for this posting. I have been so upset since getting kicked out of my suboxone program & now I see maybe it was a blessing in disguise. Thank you for this. Your story means the world to me right now.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Myrtle Beach, SC
Posts: 19
PS I was also told that you can't go through withdrawal off suboxone. What will they think of next? The dealers writing the scripts know there is money in addiction medicine but do they really care what happens to you? No. Do they even take the drugs they prescribe? What will we find out in 20 years about our new miracle cures? At one point wasn't heroin thought to be non addictive? QUERY: What is the ONE drug no doctor will kick you off of? Yours SSRI those great antidepressants that you will never be able to go off of. But doc I'm addicted to my Effexor! No, your body just needs it to survive. Addiction is when you have no control and you want more. Well damn doctor man. I need some more maybe a higher dose I'm still depressed. And you yanked my Lyrica too? WHY? Oh, it's a controlled substance. Didn't use to be. Time to start a revolution. I'm done with these chemicals I. Gonna get back into horticulture.
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