The 13th Step, Movie
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Ken33xx 
I believe Monica Richardson still has 36 years or so of sobriety. She's understandably passionate about the problem of predators but it seems something else might be going on. She's not just upset about the dangers of predatory behavior but the AA program in general as well.
Monica presents herself on any number of blogs, comments sections for articles and has a radio podcast. Some of them have been good, actually, bu there is always a catch and her "facts" change depending on her audience.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Ken33xx
No one is going to destroy AA but not all complaints are necessarily unfounded either. My guess is in the coming years we'll see a growing number of alternative recovery program.
Side note: I'll bet many ex-members who go after AA with such zest also showed the same intense enthusiasm for the program when they joined. Nothing so strong as the hate which was once love (or something like that...)
Side note: I'll bet many ex-members who go after AA with such zest also showed the same intense enthusiasm for the program when they joined. Nothing so strong as the hate which was once love (or something like that...)
If AA isn't for you, then find an alternative and help it grow. That is the only way to "combat" AA if you want to put forth your life energy that way.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Reprieve
Interesting to read the comments, appreciate the thoughtful discussion.
I have been to AA meetings all over the country, big cities and small rural towns. For the most part, I have had no issues but then I keep to myself and am very cautious. I have seen the movie twice now and the first time it made me sick (physically nauseous) because I have now seen and heard of by first hand experience many of the things she describes in the movie.
Where I live currently - when I mentioned 13 stepping to a woman with about 20+ total years of sobriety, but a slip 12 years ago , she told me that she had never even heard the term "13 stepping." Ok, that's because the men in our local meeting club prey on women - young women are their favorite of course, but even older married women will do. These men will pretend to be their friends, sweet talk them, touch them and rub their backs - really completely creepy things like that. Others are way more predatory and will get a young homeless girl to stay with them 'because they are so generous and want to help.' These women pay their rent in sex, so - you can imagine how that all goes. The key thing is that they are new to recovery and vulnerable, or - just new to the area.
So, when my female friend told me she had never even heard the term '13th stepping,' I admit I wasn't surprised. I have also heard of horrendous financial exploitation by these men of other men.
When I have spoken up and tried to make some changes I was shut down and told there were no issues, and "we don't know what you are talking about." Ok, clearly you don't want to hear what I am saying. Privately, a few women and men have shared their experiences and say they agree but don't know what to do about it. We had a suicide here recently, that's pretty serious.
So, this is why I watched the movie and I have been thinking about Monica Richardson's push to Make AA Safer, which is her whole point in bringing these issues to the table for discussion. I can no longer go to my local meetings because of these dysfunctional and dangerous behaviors, I go to local cities and travel to get there. I would like to change this environment, but it appears that no one else here is willing to even address these concerns. Monica has some really good points, and I am really glad she made the movie and is trying to make AA safer and better for all members.
Just my thoughts -
I have been to AA meetings all over the country, big cities and small rural towns. For the most part, I have had no issues but then I keep to myself and am very cautious. I have seen the movie twice now and the first time it made me sick (physically nauseous) because I have now seen and heard of by first hand experience many of the things she describes in the movie.
Where I live currently - when I mentioned 13 stepping to a woman with about 20+ total years of sobriety, but a slip 12 years ago , she told me that she had never even heard the term "13 stepping." Ok, that's because the men in our local meeting club prey on women - young women are their favorite of course, but even older married women will do. These men will pretend to be their friends, sweet talk them, touch them and rub their backs - really completely creepy things like that. Others are way more predatory and will get a young homeless girl to stay with them 'because they are so generous and want to help.' These women pay their rent in sex, so - you can imagine how that all goes. The key thing is that they are new to recovery and vulnerable, or - just new to the area.
So, when my female friend told me she had never even heard the term '13th stepping,' I admit I wasn't surprised. I have also heard of horrendous financial exploitation by these men of other men.
When I have spoken up and tried to make some changes I was shut down and told there were no issues, and "we don't know what you are talking about." Ok, clearly you don't want to hear what I am saying. Privately, a few women and men have shared their experiences and say they agree but don't know what to do about it. We had a suicide here recently, that's pretty serious.
So, this is why I watched the movie and I have been thinking about Monica Richardson's push to Make AA Safer, which is her whole point in bringing these issues to the table for discussion. I can no longer go to my local meetings because of these dysfunctional and dangerous behaviors, I go to local cities and travel to get there. I would like to change this environment, but it appears that no one else here is willing to even address these concerns. Monica has some really good points, and I am really glad she made the movie and is trying to make AA safer and better for all members.
Just my thoughts -
Do you think that the suggestion offered by AA are inadequate? Things like men with the men, woman with the woman. There are plenty of women who will let a woman in need stay with them. Monica has good points that have already been covered by AA.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 8
Actually, what it highlights is how correct AA has been in its suggestions and why they exist. There is a correlation between drinking and domestic violence but that is pretty much where the association with AA ends.
The film is also outdated and doesn't include anything such as the amount of drugs, legal and illegal, that were in Karla's system or the many efforts of others to stop this from happening. These people were not doing one thing that AA would suggest, and no one ever suggests taking someone into your home after they have failed to follow the directives of the halfway house Earle was housed in. You don't have to be against AA to see the ending for this train ride. It was was awful, but I am sure the people who tried to get her to leave him in jail did everything they could to show her that the only person with rights was her.
The film is also outdated and doesn't include anything such as the amount of drugs, legal and illegal, that were in Karla's system or the many efforts of others to stop this from happening. These people were not doing one thing that AA would suggest, and no one ever suggests taking someone into your home after they have failed to follow the directives of the halfway house Earle was housed in. You don't have to be against AA to see the ending for this train ride. It was was awful, but I am sure the people who tried to get her to leave him in jail did everything they could to show her that the only person with rights was her.
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Join Date: Sep 2015
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Clarabelle thanks for putting some light on the subject, I suspected right at the beginning that Monica Richardson was a phone'y she is also a liar twisting things to suit her agenda , she is out to make money first and foremost then to make trouble for AA , I have no time for people like that nor do I have any time for those that add fuel to the fire including some AA s , I have said enough thanks Clarabelle, take care .
Regards Stevie recovered 12 03 2006
Regards Stevie recovered 12 03 2006
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 8
Yes, a learning tool is exactly how I see it. I understand it is poorly done and deviates in so many ways, but it shows people just why AA has some of the suggestions it has. The trustee who presented the letter to the board whom Monica says chose to ignore it is misrepresented. Cleary just didn't get the result he wanted. It was read, discussed and determined that each group has the right to handle ANY incidents as it chooses. The prancing about the building housing AA's NY offices, screaming why won't you talk to me... was simply posturing. AA doesn't talk to ANYone. She counts on viewers to not know that.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
I find it interesting that the thread started out to be about The 13'th Step movie, but reading the comments here, it sounds like most have not seen it but there is all the discussion...
I watched it this weekend for free on Amazon. It's nothing brilliant or particularly well-done, but was worth the 50something minutes run time for me. In fact, 13th stepping is only part of it, and it was the less interesting part for me. It also discussed a few other larger aspects of what people tend to criticize about AA. Of course it is not comprehensive but that cannot be expected from a documentary, it just provides a certain perspective.
I watched it this weekend for free on Amazon. It's nothing brilliant or particularly well-done, but was worth the 50something minutes run time for me. In fact, 13th stepping is only part of it, and it was the less interesting part for me. It also discussed a few other larger aspects of what people tend to criticize about AA. Of course it is not comprehensive but that cannot be expected from a documentary, it just provides a certain perspective.
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