Nonsensical

And if you drink tomorrow you will wish you hadn't. It's a vicious cycle. I know, I was trapped in it, too.

Before you go out to do whatever it is you need to do, sit down and make a list of the 5 worst things that will happen if you DON'T buy booze while you are out. Write it down on paper and take it with you. When you are out and thinking about buying booze get the list out and read it. The need for booze can feel very urgent. I found a list like that helps me understand that sense of urgency isn't actually as urgent as it feels.

You want sobriety bad? Go get it!

You can do this!

Ktmbuurger570

Well the new day is here.
Not much sleep but that was expected.
Thank everyone for the advice. I WILL make a list this morning as the sun comes up. There is no liquor in the house and I am by myself.
I am dreading going anywhere today as the temptations are everywhere. Emotions are high as I am trying to legally finalize a separation from my wife. She has been gone for months but the papers and assets are still in the air. Stressful.
Thank you everyone. I talk to no one so this helps.

Yogini1603

I think you're doing well for posting here. It's a step towards recovery and that's a big thing.

Don't get idle hands this weekend. I'm only a few months into sobriety and keeping myself busy is massively important. I've made like 18 hemp necklaces as I get cracking on one when I get a craving! Find what works for you and indulge it :-)

Flawed

Ktm, I tried many times as well, I'm still trying but today am on day 34. You can do this, I promise. Get a plan, get help especially since there's a divorce pending. This is a perfect time for a fresh start!

Ktmbuurger570

Any advice on getting past the second day of not drinking?
The second day is the hardest for me so far. You know the "hey I didn't drink yesterday so..." That seems to be the hurdle I can't seem to jump yet.

Ktmbuurger570

Today WILL be day one again.

2ndhandrose

Ktm, can you go to an AA meeting? Do you see a counselor?

Please stick around SR, you can do this

entropy1964

Hi Ktm

For me there is no way to get past the second day but to make a serious, complete commitment to not drink, one day at a time. There is no magic pill or spell. I will not drink today, period. I can't listen to the temptation, I have to squash it utterly and completely. If that means I give my keys and wallet to a friend so I can't buy booze, that is what I do. If it means going to a detox facility or dr, that is what I do.

And yes, distractions. Reading, housework/yard work, journaling, reading/posting on SR, AA (if I can handle leaving the house), eating good food, lots of hydration. But ultimately you have to want to be clear headed more than you want to drink. For me, unfortunately, I had to get good and beat up. You don't have to do that.

My thinking is everything and it is my responsibility to change the voices. Change the tape. I cannot indulge my addiction even a little.

If I can do this (btw I'm only on day 11 this time so hardly any big victories) you can.

Ktmbuurger570

Thank you for the encouraging words.
One small step today. I had to go to town this morning. I always stop for vodka. I did not stop today.

Ktmbuurger570

I haven't looked into meetings. I'm sure there are meetings here and available. But that really scares me. I'm a very private person. Never been able to speak in a group with confidence. Especially strangers.

fantail

You can go and just listen. I went to meetings for over a month before I said a word. The people there understand, they've all been through it.

Soberwolf

no matter what do not drink choose not to & get through it we'l be with you all the way but it has to be you who just doesn't drink KTM

Dee74

Welcome aboard Ktmbuurger570

lots of great suggestions here - give something a go - the smallest change can sometimes make the difference

D

Delilah1

How are you doing tonight Ktm?

Ktmbuurger570

So far so good! It's Sunday morning and I'm not hungover!
I kept myself busy outside yesterday. That kept my mind off things.
Another step forward today.
Thanks for asking.

Camery03

Hi KTM- I too am in early stages of quitting. I wouldn't leave the store without my bottle of vodka whenever I went out, which was sometimes daily. I live alone, but find things to do to occupy my time. I come very close everyday to just throw in the towel and go and buy the bottle to avoid the anxiety and fear that comes along with not drinking.
In fact, just this week, I was having a great day with friends ( no drinking involved) and came home to an empty house. My first thought was to go to the liquor store and get a small bottle of vodka and have a few cocktails. But, then I came here instead.
This is a GREAT resource, and one that has helped me survive my very first week of being sober.
YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!

Arpeggioh

Today was the first Sunday in many months that I wasn't hung over; as a paid church musician, that's pretty important, for me and also my entire congregation. I sang better, played the piano better, looked better, felt better...

...and still, all through the sermon, my AV kept saying, "You've got all day to drink, and no one would know..."

And my true self had to really man up, just in the last 15 minutes, and reply, "Are you kidding me? Give up feeling this much better for another fifth of vodka and the shame and the guilt and the disappointment that comes along with another drunken Sunday afternoon? **** off, AV...I'm going to make some coffee and come visit my supportive, caring friends at my favorite recovery website!"

It quite honestly came down to that kind of actual conversation in my own head, because those drinking thoughts are not ME, they don't come from my true self, they come from IT: my crazy, nasty, evil addiction trying to trick me, like it's done over and over for decades! As long as I keep talking back to IT, I'll have a full week sober when I go to bed tonight, and that feels so much better than any temporary numbness a bottle of vodka could provide.

So, yes KTM, I totally get your thoughts right now. Get past two days, that hurdle you feel you can't leap over, and see how you feel on a Monday without a hangover. It's worth the fight (and I do mean fight!)

Good luck today,
Arp

Arpeggioh

And Camery: first I've seen of you, but our lives sound very similar: live alone, vodka drunk, fighting daily for my first full week without it...nice to "meet" you! Good luck to you as well!

Arp

Camery03

Good luck to you as well ARP! It is my first week as a sober person. I am feeling good. I cant say that the cravings aren't there, or the temptation isn't, but I have made a commitment to myself to stop this nonsense, and get my life back!

Ktmbuurger570

I am going to do this. Thanks for all the support.
I also live alone. Have been drinking 12oz of vodka a day (or more)for at least a dozen years. I know it's been 12 oz a day because that's what I would buy everyday. If I bought bigger bottles I would drink more. Never at bars. Always at home. Sad and lonely that's for sure.