30/60/90 Days or 1/2/3 Months?
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 3
30/60/90 Days or 1/2/3 Months?
Why is it that they call the first 3 milestones 30 days, 60 days, & 90 days, but the coins say 1 month, 2 months, & 3 months?
This presents some confusion, especially for newcomers (i.e. the same people who are celebrating these milestones). Depending on the meeting you're at and whether the birthday chair, meeting chair, whomever is counting days or months.
It's irrelevant at this point for me since I have 93 days right now, but this awkward situation unfolded at my Monday meeting:
Meeting Chair: I don't see any birthdays in the box; has anyone celebrated a birthday in the past week?
Me: Uh, I'm in the box, and I'm celebrating 90 days today.
Meeting Chair: I saw your card, and it says November 23rd.
Me: Yes, that was exactly 90 days ago. There were two 31-day months in between.
(awkward silence)
Me: I skipped volleyball league tonight for this, dammit, I want my token!
(awkward laughter)
...
So, my question is, WTF?
This presents some confusion, especially for newcomers (i.e. the same people who are celebrating these milestones). Depending on the meeting you're at and whether the birthday chair, meeting chair, whomever is counting days or months.
It's irrelevant at this point for me since I have 93 days right now, but this awkward situation unfolded at my Monday meeting:
Meeting Chair: I don't see any birthdays in the box; has anyone celebrated a birthday in the past week?
Me: Uh, I'm in the box, and I'm celebrating 90 days today.
Meeting Chair: I saw your card, and it says November 23rd.
Me: Yes, that was exactly 90 days ago. There were two 31-day months in between.
(awkward silence)
Me: I skipped volleyball league tonight for this, dammit, I want my token!
(awkward laughter)
...
So, my question is, WTF?
Maybe because it's easier to fit Roman numerals on the tokens, and they have a gravitas that Arabic numbers lack.
I have regularly attended a meeting where they announce it as "one month" "two months". I think for reasons of simplicity, you could just count your "month" as the 23rd every month.
A healthy person wouldn't quibble with that.
That was a truly bizarre exchange, not sure I've ever witnessed that at a meeting.
I have regularly attended a meeting where they announce it as "one month" "two months". I think for reasons of simplicity, you could just count your "month" as the 23rd every month.
A healthy person wouldn't quibble with that.
That was a truly bizarre exchange, not sure I've ever witnessed that at a meeting.
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 3
Of course...from here on out the milestones are in months and years, so that simplifies things quite a bit. Glad to be not having to count days anymore (although I probably still will), glad to have stumbled upon this forum, and grateful to be sober today!
I just pick up on the monthiversery (yes, I am inventing words!) and don't count days, but I wouldn't refuse to give someone a chip if it had been 30/60/90 days. I go to NA and they do keytags that do indeed say 30/60/90 days on them, whereas AA's chips say 1/2/3 months, etc.
By the way, November 23rd is my birthday!
By the way, November 23rd is my birthday!
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome to our recovery community.....
Well done on your 93 days
The 3 home groups I've belonged to all have done this differently
The first in D.C. did not give out anything to de note anything.
they only asked you to raise your hand if you were in your
first 30 period time.
Groups 1 & 2 give poker chips..no numbers .various colored
to denote different times What was green in Fl. is now red in Ga.
Well done on your 93 days
The 3 home groups I've belonged to all have done this differently
The first in D.C. did not give out anything to de note anything.
they only asked you to raise your hand if you were in your
first 30 period time.
Groups 1 & 2 give poker chips..no numbers .various colored
to denote different times What was green in Fl. is now red in Ga.
This isn't gonna be a question that will cause me to lose sleep tonight. First off, who cares whether someone says one month or 30 days? I go both ways when I'm chipping. It's simpler to say 6 months than 180 days. And secondly, who does the counting? I've never seen anyone in any group validate a person's sobriety time before they can pick up a chip. Maybe Meeting Chair needs to work on some control issues.
Honestly, it isn't a big deal. My home group refers to 30, 60, 90 days and then six months, and a year. The only reason anyone MIGHT question anything (and it shouldn't be in front of the group) is that some people would go up to get a chip when their anniversary isn't until the following week. In those instances we usually remind people that we don't celebrate (even 20 years) until the date comes. (Again, though, this should be a private discussion, and NOT a "scold").
Another perennial dilemma some people have is whether they count from the day of their last drink or their first day without a drink. I know people who count both ways. That doesn't matter, either. You can celebrate either day.
Getting bogged down in that sort of thing sort of defeats the whole purpose.
Another perennial dilemma some people have is whether they count from the day of their last drink or their first day without a drink. I know people who count both ways. That doesn't matter, either. You can celebrate either day.
Getting bogged down in that sort of thing sort of defeats the whole purpose.
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Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 8
It does matter.
I disagree with all the people that say a healthy person doesn’t need to know this, don’t get bogged in the details, etc. With 20 days of sobriety, I am counting every 24 hour period that I’ve not succumbed to my addiction. I will be proud to earn my chip. Please don’t tell me this is not important and I shouldn’t worry about whether it’s 30 days or one month. Maybe for people who have been sober for a while it doesn’t matter. To newcomers, it does.
you hit the nail on the head and even to many with years of recovery, it means a lot to see the newcomers make it 30,60,90 days. we know the years we have is a long time, but 30,60,90 days can be an eternity.
i still remember when 2 months came up and i got my coin.
and was asked,"howd ya do it?"
being quite honest i said,"i have absolutely no clue. ive never been sober 2 months in a row."
EVERY day not drinking early one means something.
keep comin,back,Khaleesi!
i still remember when 2 months came up and i got my coin.
and was asked,"howd ya do it?"
being quite honest i said,"i have absolutely no clue. ive never been sober 2 months in a row."
EVERY day not drinking early one means something.
keep comin,back,Khaleesi!
Even though I'm not an AA person, the whole counting days thing really clicks with me somehow. I love everything to do with counting sober days. At first I used to log into SR right after midnight every night to update the sober days ticker in my profile. Each one felt like a victory to me, like I was turning the tide slowly but surely. I still feel that way but probably not as strongly as I did back in the early days. I'm around 9 months now in my current streak, can't wait til I hit 1 year!
Hi Greg and congratulations on your well earned 93 (maybe now 94?) days! I agree that day counting at first is a very big deal because let's face it we've worked really hard for every single one of them. I like to have little goals and my current one is 100 days. That'll be a new personal record!
The thing about the AA business does irk me a little because we are often encouraged to do 90 in 90 and yet there's no coin for 90. Just an observation and yes I was a little cross on your behalf. Just my little twopenneth.......keep it up you're doing great! xxx
The thing about the AA business does irk me a little because we are often encouraged to do 90 in 90 and yet there's no coin for 90. Just an observation and yes I was a little cross on your behalf. Just my little twopenneth.......keep it up you're doing great! xxx
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