Luckyv2

Step One



As addicts, we have each experienced the pain, loneliness, and despair of addiction. Before coming to NA, most of us tried everything we could think of to control our use of drugs. We tried switching drugs, thinking that we only had a problem with one particular drug. We tried limiting our drug use to certain times or places. We may even have vowed to stop using altogether at a certain point. We may have told ourselves we would never do the things we watched other addicts do, then found ourselves doing those very things. Nothing we tried had any lasting effect. Our active addiction continued to progress, overpowering even our best intentions. Alone, terrified of what the future held for us, we found the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous.


As members of Narcotics Anonymous, our experience is that addiction is a progressive disease. The progression may be rapid or slow, but it is always downhill. As long as we are using drugs, our lives will steadily get worse. It would be impossible to precisely describe addiction in a way that is agreeable to everyone. However, the disease seems to affect us in the following general ways. Mentally, we become obsessed with thoughts of using. Physically, we develop a compulsion to continue using, regardless of the consequences. Spiritually, we become totally self-centered in the course of our addiction. Looking at addiction as a disease makes sense to a lot of addicts because, in our experience, addiction is progressive, incurable, and can be fatal unless arrested.


In Narcotics Anonymous, we deal with every aspect of our addiction, not just its most obvious symptom:
our uncontrollable drug use. The aspects of our disease are numerous. By practicing this program, we each discover the ways in which our addiction affects us personally. Regardless of the individual effects of addiction on our lives, all of us share some common characteristics. Through working the First Step we will address the obsession, the compulsion, the denial, and what many have termed a "spiritual void."


As we examine and acknowledge all these aspects of our disease, we start to understand our powerlessness. Many of us have had problems with the idea that, as addicts, we are obsessive and compulsive. The idea that these words applied to us may have made us cringe. However, obsession and compulsion are aspects of our powerlessness. We need to understand and acknowledge their presence in our lives if our admission of powerlessness is to be complete. Obsession, for us, is the never-ending stream of thoughts relating to using drugs, running out of drugs, getting more drugs, and so on. We simply can't get these thoughts out of our minds. In our experience, compulsion is the irrational impulse to continue using drugs. no matter what happens as a result. We just can't stop. We address obsession and compulsion here as they relate to our drug use because, when we first come into the program, our drug addiction is how we identify with each other and the program. As we continue in our recovery, we will see how these aspects of our addiction can manifest themselves in many areas of our lives.


Denial is the part of our disease that makes it difficult, if not impossible, for us to acknowledge reality. In our addiction, denial protected us from seeing the reality of what our lives had become. We often told ourselves that, given the right set of circumstances, we might still be able to bring our lives under control. Always skillful at defending our actions, we refused to accept responsibility for the damage done by our addiction. We believed that if we tried long and hard enough, substituted one drug for another, switched friends, or changed our living arrangements or occupations, our lives would improve. These rationalizations repeatedly failed us, yet we continued to cling to them. We denied that we had a problem with drugs, regardless of all evidence to the contrary. We lied to ourselves, believing that we could use again successfully. We justified our actions, despite the wreckage around us resulting from our addiction.spiritual part of our disease, the part we may recognize only by a feeling of emptiness or loneliness when we first get clean, is perhaps one of the most difficult aspects of addiction for us. Because this part of our disease affects us so profoundly and so personally, we may be overwhelmed when we think about applying a program of recovery to it. However, we need to keep in mind that recovery doesn't happen overnight for anyone.


As we start to look at the effects of our disease, we are sure to see that our lives have become unmanageable. We see it in all the things that are wrong with our lives. Again, our experiences are individual and vary widely from addict to addict. Some of us realized our lives had become unmanageable because we felt out of control emotionally or began to feel guilty about our drug use. Some of us have lost everything-our homes, our families, our jobs, and our self-respect. Some of us never learned how to function as human beings at all. Some of us have spent time in jails and institutions. And some of us have come very close to death. Whatever our individual circumstances, our lives have been governed by obsessive, compulsive, self-seeking behavior, and the end result has been unmanageability.


Perhaps we arrived in NA without recognizing the problems we had for what they were. Because of our self-centeredness, we were often the last ones to realize that we were addicts. Many of us were persuaded by friends or family to begin attending NA meetings. Other members received even stronger encouragement from the courts. No matter how it occurred, our long-standing illusions had to be shattered. Honesty had to replace denial before we could face the truth of our addiction.


Many of us recall the moment of clarity when we came face to face with our disease. All the lies, all the pretenses, all the rationalizations we had used to justify where we stood as a result of our drug use stopped working. Who and what we were became more clear. We could no longer avoid the truth.


We have found that we cannot recover without the ability to be honest. Many of us came to NA after spending years practicing dishonesty. However, we can learn to be honest, and we must begin to try. Learning to be honest is an ongoing process; we are able to become progressively more honest as we work the steps and continue to stay clean. In the First Step, we begin to practice the spiritual principle of honesty by admitting the truth about our drug use. Then we go on to admit the truth about our lives. We face what is, not the way things could be or should be. It doesn't matter where we come from or how good or bad we think we've had it: when we finally turn to Narcotics Anonymous and the Twelve Steps, we begin to find relief.


As we begin working the First Step, it is important to ask ourselves some basic personal questions: Can I control my use of drugs? Am I willing to stop using? Am I willing to do whatever it takes to recover? Given a choice between finding a new way of life in NA and continuing in our addiction, recovery begins to appeal to us.


We begin to let go of our reservations. those parts of ourselves we won't surrender to the program. Most of us do have some reservations when we first get clean. Even so, we need to find ways of addressing them. Reservations can be anything: a belief that, because we never had a problem with one particular drug, we can still use it; placing a condition on our recovery. such as only staying clean as long as our expectations are met: a belief that we can still be involved with the people associated with our addiction; a belief that we can use again after a certain amount of time clean: a conscious or unconscious decision to work only certain steps. With the help of other recovering addicts, we can find ways to put our reservations behind us. The most important thing for us to know about reservations is that, by keeping them, we are reserving a place in our program for relapse.


Recovery begins when we start to apply the spiritual principles contained in the Twelve Steps of NA to all areas of our lives. We realize. however, that we cannot begin this process unless we stop using drugs. Total abstinence from all drugs is the only way we can begin to overcome our addiction. While abstinence is the beginning, our only hope for recovery is a profound emotional and spiritual change.


Our experience shows that it is necessary for us to be willing to do anything it takes to obtain this precious gift of recovery. In recovery, we will be introduced to spiritual principles such as the surrender, honesty. and acceptance required for the First Step. If we faithfully practice these principles, they will transform our perceptions and the way we live our lives.
When we first begin to practice these principles, they may seem very unnatural to us. It may take a deliberate effort on our part to make the honest admission called for in Step One. Even though we are admitting our addiction, we may still wonder if this program will really work. Acceptance of our addiction is something that goes beyond our conscious admission. When we accept our addiction, we gain the hope of recovery. We begin to believe on a deep level that we, too, can recover. We begin to let go of our doubts and truly come to terms with our disease. We become open to change. We surrender.


As we work the First Step, we find that surrender is not what we thought it was. In the past, we probably thought of surrender as something that only weak and cowardly people did. We saw only two choices: either keep fighting to control our using or just cave in completely and let our lives fall to pieces. We felt we were in a battle to control our using and that, if we surrendered, the drugs would win. In recovery, we find that surrender involves letting go of our reservations about recovery and being willing to try a different approach to living life. The process of surrender is extremely personal for each one of us. Only we, as individuals, know when we've done it. We stress the importance of surrender, for it is the very process that enables us to recover. When we surrender, we know in our hearts that we've had enough. We're tired of fighting. A relief comes over us as we finally realize that the struggle is over.


No matter how hard we fought, we finally reached the point of surrender where we realized that we couldn't stop using drugs on our own. We were able to admit our powerlessness over our addiction. We gave up completely. Even though we didn't know exactly what would happen, we gathered up our courage and admitted our powerlessness. We gave up the illusion that we could control our using, thereby opening the door to recovery.


Many of us begin the process of surrender when we identify ourselves at an NA meeting with our name and the words, "I am an addict." Once we admit that we are addicts and that we cannot stop using on our own, we are able to stay clean on a daily basis with the help of other recovering addicts in Narcotics Anonymous. The paradox of this admission is evident once we work the First Step. As long as we think we can control our drug use, we are almost forced to continue. The minute we admit we're powerless, we never have to use again. This reprieve from having to use is the most profound gift we can receive, for it saves our lives.


Through our collective experience, we have found that we can accomplish together what we cannot do alone. It is necessary for us to seek help from other recovering addicts. As we attend meetings regularly, we can find great comfort in the experiences of those traveling this path with us. Coming to NA has been described by many members as "coming home." We find ourselves welcomed and accepted by other recovering addicts. We finally find a place where we belong.


Though we are sure to be helped by the sharing we hear at meetings, we need to find a sponsor to help us in our recovery. Beginning with the First Step, a sponsor can share with us his or her own experience with the steps. Listening to our sponsor's experience and applying it to our own lives is how we take advantage of one of the most beautiful and practical aspects of recovery: the therapeutic value of one addict helping another.


We hear in our meetings that "I can't, but we can." Actively working with a sponsor will give us some first-hand experience with this. Through our developing relationship with our sponsor, we learn about the principle of trust. By following the suggestions of our sponsor instead of only our own ideas, we learn the principles of open-mindedness and willingness. Our sponsor will help us work the steps of recovery.


Talking honestly with our sponsor about our drug use and how it affected our lives will help us work the First Step thoroughly. We need always remember where we came from and where our addiction took us. We have only a daily reprieve from our active addiction. Each day, we accept the fact that we cannot use drugs successfully.


The process of recovery isn't easy. It takes great courage and perseverance to continue in recovery day after day. Part of the recovery process is to move forward in spite of whatever may stand in our way. Because long-lasting change in recovery happens slowly, we will turn to the First Step again and again.


Even long periods of abstinence do not guarantee us continued freedom from the pain and trouble that addiction can bring~ The symptoms of our disease can always return. We may find that we are powerless in ways we never imagined. This is where we begin to understand how the things we tried so hard to control are, in reality, completely beyond our control. No matter how our disease displays itself, we must take its deadly nature into account. As we do, we develop a fuller awareness of the nature of our disease.


The disease of addiction can manifest itself in a variety of mental obsessions and compulsive actions that have nothing to do with drugs. We sometimes find ourselves obsessed and behaving compulsively over things we may never have had problems with until we stopped using drugs. We may once again try to fill the awful emptiness we sometimes feel with something outside ourselves. Any time we find ourselves using something to change the way we feel, we need to apply the principles of the First Step.


We are never immune from having our lives become unmanageable, even after years of recovery. If problems pile up and our resources for coping with them dwindle, we may feel out of control and in too much pain to do anything constructive for ourselves. We feel overwhelmed by life, and that feeling seems to make everything worse. When our lives seem to be falling apart, we reapply ourselves to the basics of the NA program. We stay in close contact with our sponsor, work the steps, and go to meetings. We surrender again, knowing that victory lies in the admission of defeat.


The feeling of love and acceptance we find in the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous allows us to begin recovering from our addiction. We learn a new way to live. The emptiness from which we suffered is filled through working and living the Twelve Steps. We learn that our addiction is being addressed in all its complexity by this simple program. We have found a solution to our hopelessness.


There is a deeply spiritual nature to our program of recovery. The Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous will take us on a journey that will far exceed our expectations. Working and living the steps will lead us to a spiritual awakening. Step One is the beginning of this spiritual journey. To get started on this journey, we must become willing to surrender to this program and its principles. for our future hinges on our willingness to grow spiritually.


We are starting a new way of life, one that offers great joy and happiness. However, recovery doesn't exempt us from pain. Living life on life's terms combines moments of happiness with moments of sadness. Wonderful events are mixed with painful ones. We will experience a full range of feelings about the events in our lives.


By honestly looking at what we have become in our addiction, we recognize the powerlessness and unmanageability of our lives. Moving beyond our reservations, we accept our addiction, surrender, and experience the hope that recovery offers. We realize that we can no longer go on as we have been. We are ready for a change. We are willing to try another way. With our willingness, we move on to Step Two.

Copyright © 1993, Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Luckyv2

Step Two



"We came to believe that a Power Greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."
Our surrender in the First Step leaves us with a deep need to believe that we can recover. This surrender makes it possible for us to feel hope. By admitting our own powerlessness, we open our minds to an entirely new idea: The possibility that something greater than ourselves might be powerful enough to relieve our obsession to use drugs. It is quite likely that, before coming to NA, we never believed in any power but our own willpower, and that had failed us. NA introduces us to a new understanding. We draw hope from the understanding and begin to comprehend what it means to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. We find additional hope by listening to other recovering addicts. We can relate to where they've been and draw hope from who they've become. We listen closely at meetings and become willing to apply what we hear to our own lives. As we begin to believe that there is hope for us, we also begin to trust the process of recovery.

Our White Booklet states, "There is one thing more than anything else that will defeat us in our recovery; this is a n attitude of indifference or intolerance toward spiritual principles. Three of these that are indispensable are honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness." this doesn't mean we must be unfailingly honest, open-minded, and willing. We just have to try as best we can to practice these principles. As we first approach Step Two, we can practice the principles of honesty by acknowledging and sharing what we do or don't believe about a Power greater than ourselves. Developing our open-mindedness requires some effort, but we can practice this principle by listening to other recovering addicts share how they came to believe. For many of us, the willingness to try something new came about simply because we were so tired of our old ways. It seemed to us that, because our own power wasn't sufficient to restore our sanity, perhaps something else could, if we let it.


Many of us felt that insanity was too harsh a word to describe our condition. However, if we take a realistic look at our active addiction, we'll see that we have been anything but sane. For the most part, our perceptions were not based in reality. We viewed the world around us as a hostile environment. Some of us withdrew physically and had little, if any, contact with anyone. Some of us went through the motions of life but allowed nothing to touch us emotionally. Either way, we ended up feeling isolated. Despite eveidence to the contrary, we felt that we were in control. We ignored or didn't believe the truths that were staring us in the face. We continued to do the same things and expected the results to be different. Worst of all was the fact that we continued to use drugs, regardless of the negative consequence we experienced. despite the warning signs that our drug use was out of control, we continued trying to justify it. All too often, the result was that we could no longer face ourselves. When we take a realistic look at our lives, there can be no doubt that we desperately need a restoration to sanity.


Regardless of our individual interpretation of the term "restoration," most of us agree that, for us, it means changing to a point where addiction and its accompanying insanity are not controlling our lives. Being restored to sanity is a life-long process. Individually, we experience it differently aty varying stages of our recovery, but we all can see some results of this process right from the beginning of our recovery. Initially, being restored to sanity means that we no longer have to use drugs. We go to meetings rather than isolating. We call our sponsor rather than sitting alone with painful feelings. We ask for our sponsor's guidance in working the steps, a real demonstration of sanity. We begin to believe that a powerful force can restore us to sanity. As long last, we feel hope for ourselves.


"We came to believe" implies a process. For some, this process is simple, and it may bring immediate results. Many of us arrived in NA so completely defeated that we were willing to try anything. Seeking help from a Power greater than ourselves many have been the best ideal we had ever heard. However, the process of coming to believe can be difficult, even painful. Many of us have found that acting as if we believe is helpful. This does not mean we should be (Pg. 20) dishonest. Rather, it means that if we have doubts, we practice the program as if we believe we can be restored to sanity.


Believes in a power greater than ourselves does not come easily to all of us. However, we have found an open-minded indispensable when we approach a step. If we look around us, we find many reasons to believe. Our believe may be simple but that we can recover from a lie from active addiction. The freedom from the session to use may be our first experience of a power greater than ourselves at work in our lives. Perhaps for the first time in many years, our obsession with drugs at no longer controls are every waking moment. No one that we don't have to use today is a powerful believe in and of itself.


We start to develop faith through the process of coming to believe. It starts with hope. For some of us, this may be only a faint spark at first, perhaps just the thought that maybe, if we work this program, our lives will get better. Our hope turns to face as our lives begin to improve. For most of us, faith can be described as a believe in something intangible. After all, who can logically explain the sudden lifting of an obsession to use drugs, yet this has happened for many of us. With our hope for a different life in the beginning of our faith that recovery is possible, we start the process of coming to believe in a power greater than ourselves.


We come from various walks of life and experience, so it is natural that we bring with us different concepts of spirituality. And in a comma no one is forced to believe any set ideas. Each one of us can believe in anything in which we want to believe. This is a spiritual program, not a religion. Individually, we cultivate our own believes about a power greater than than we are. No matter what we understand this power to be, help is available to us all.


In the beginning many of us turn to the group or the love we encountered in narcotics anonymous as our firepower. An in a group is a powerful example of a power greater than ourselves at work. Often in desperation, we enter a room full of addicts who share their experience, strength, and hope with us. As we listen, we know with certainty that they have felt the hopelessness and remorse from which we, too, have suffered. As we observe other addicts practice in a new way of life without the use of drugs, we may come to believe that we, too, can recover. Watch and other addicts stay clean as compelling proof of the existence of a power greater than ourselves. We notice that except as set recovering addict show each other. We watch addict's celebrate links of clean time that we think will be impossible for us to attain. Perhaps someone hugs us and tells us to "keep come back". Members give us their phone numbers. We fill the power of the group, and this helps us start to heal.


Many of us use spiritual principles as a power greater than ourselves. We come to believe that, by practice in these principles in our lives, we can be restored to sanity. This makes sense to us because we have tried many times to think ourselves into a better way of life. We usually had good intentions, but our day-to-day existence rarely measured up to those intentions. Trying it the other way, practice and a better way of life by living accordingly to spiritual principles, will eventually have an effect on her thinking.


Is not necessary that we defined for ourselves the entire concept of a power greater than ourselves. Those of us with many years of recovery find that our understanding of a higher power changes over time. Our believe grows, as does our faith. We come to believe in the power which can help us for more than we originally thought. As we search for understanding of a higher power, we can talk with our sponsor in other recovering addicts. We may ask them what their idea of a higher power is and how they have arrived at it. This may open our minds to possibilities we hadn't considered before.


While it is useful to question others about their spiritual beliefs, we must remember that our understanding of a power greater than ourselves is up to each individual. Others can help us. We may have even adopt the ideas of someone else for a while or just believe that they believe. Eventually, however, we need to come to believe for ourselves the need for our own sense of spirituality is too vital to our recovery for us to neglect this highly personal process.


For us, part of the process of coming to believe is excepting the evidence we see. Our addiction caused us to deny the truth we saw. But now, in recovery, we can believe what we see. At first, we open our minds and try something new, somehow believing that what we try might work. After we take a few small steps toward believe and trust and see resolved, we become willing to take bigger steps. We find that we are no longer acting as if we believe. Our believe is now reinforced without our own personal experience, some of which is unexplainable. We sometimes encounter remarkable coincidences in our lives that have no rational explanation. We don't need to explain or analyze these occurrences. We can simply accept that they happen and be grateful for them.


The longer we stay clean, the more evidence it becomes that our addiction goes much deeper than the drugs we used. Much of our problems seems to center in our search for something to make us feel whole. It is a tremendous struggle to stop her lion on her own reasoning and asked for help, especially given the self-centered nature of our disease. However, we are become an open-minded. And realizing that we don't have all the answers, we begin to find some humility. We may not grasp the full impact of what being humble means, but our open-mindedness assures us that we have found and had begun to demonstrate this by able quality.


Our humility and open-mindedness makes us teachable. We allow others to share what has worked for them this makes humility, for we must let go of our fears about how we may appear to others. Some of the strongest suggestions we may receive from other addicts are to attend meetings, asked for help, pray, and work the steps. Our experience has shown us that believe in a higher power leaves us toward recovery in narcotics anonymous. People tend to live what they believe, and our newfound believe calls on us to live the program. No matter what we choose for our personal firepower, we've come to believe that in eight works. We live what we believe why continuing our path of recovery and work the 12 steps to the best of our ability.


Even after years clean, when we have been working a program of recovery and seeking change, we may at times experience periods when life seems meaningless. We may experience a sense of alienation too painful to ignore. At such times, we may find ourselves moving away from sanity, not toward it. We may begin to question our commitment to recovery. We can become obsessed with self-destructive thoughts. We may feel an urge to fall back on what seems easier; the familiar ways of our addiction. During these times, we need to renew our commitment to recovery. We trust that we are undergoing a fundamental transformation, even though we may not yet understand its full implication for our lives. As painful as it seems, we must change. If we trust that there is growth despite the pain, we can walk through these difficult areas more readily.


During these times, relying on the second step provides us with hope and reminds us that we are not alone. If things don't go right, we take time to think and seek suggestions from our sponsor. We trust that, with help from other recovering addicts in a power greater than ourselves, we can be restored to sanity in all areas of our lives. We draw upon what we have learned from going to meetings and following directions. We accept that life on wise terms may not always be our liking or, more importantly, your understanding. Sanity often means that we don't act on her first impulse. We begin to make choices that helps us rather than harm us. What works for us in the beginning remains applicable, no matter how many years we have been clean. Once again, we reapply ourselves to the basics of this program: going to meetings, reaching out for help, and work in the steps. Although we may feel desperate, there is hope; a power greater than ourselves is always available to us. Along with hope we do ride from work in step two, we find that our way of thinking is undergoing a radical change. The whole world looks different. Where before we had no reason to hope, we now have every reason to expect a dramatic difference in our lives. By being open-minded, we've opened ourselves to new ideas. We stepped away from the problem and toward a spiritual solution.


This solution is evidence by her open-mindedness and our willingness to believe in a power greater than ourselves. We must now go on to step three to develop a relationship with the God of our understanding.

Copyright © 1993, Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Luckyv2

Step Three



We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him.

The surrender we experienced in step one, coupled with the hope and believe we find in step two, make us ready and willing to continue on a path toward freedom in narcotics anonymous. In step three, we put our belief in a higher power into action, making a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God of our understanding.

Essentially to work the third step is our willingness to allow the God of our understanding to work in our lives. We developed this willingness over time. The willingness we experienced in our early recovery is not able human though we may he willing only to a certain degree. Although the this may feel like unconditional willingness, many of us have discovered that our willingness group as we learn to trust a power greater than ourselves.


The decision we make in step three requires that we move away from ourselves well. Self will is composed of such characteristics as close mindedness, unwillingness, self-centeredness, and outright defiance. Our self-centered obsession and its accompanying insanity have made our lives unmanageable. Acting on her self will has kept us trapped in a continuous cycle of fear and pain. We wore ourselves out and fruitless attempts to control everyone and everything. We couldn’t just allow events to happen we were oldies on the lookout for ways we could force things to go as we wanted.


When we first look at making a decision called for in the this step, we are likely to have questions, uncertainty, and even fear about what we are being asked to do. We might wonder why we need to make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God of our understanding. Or we may wonder what what happened to us if we place ourselves in God’s care. We may fear that we won’t be happy with what our lives will be like after working the step.


When we trust that there is growth in taking action despite our fear of uncertainty, we are able to work step three. Even though we do not know how our lives will change as we work to step, we can learn to trust that our higher power will care for us better than we could. The third step is our commitment to our own emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being.
We’ll begin in the second step as believe the Higher power can become a fuller relationship with the God of our understanding in step three the decisions that we make by working the step, and the relationship that results, will revolutionize our existence.


The decision is easier to make than to live by. We can easily lapse into old behavior: it takes determination, time, and encouraged to change. Because we’re not perfect, we simply continue to reaffirm our decision on a regular basis and then do the very best we can to live by it. Complete and unconditional surrender of our will and our lives is an ideal we strive to fulfill. Although do we don’t become perfect, we do make a profound change by work in this step. We are making a serious effort to live differently than we have in the past. From now on, we’re going to be practicing this decision, and the way we relate to the world around us can change radically as a result.


In a work in step three we begin to learn how to stop struggling. We learn to let go and trust the God of our understanding. If we take time to think and seek correction before acting, we no longer have to run on her own self will. Turning our will and our lives over to the care of our higher power provides a solution to the problems created by a life based in self will, resentment, and control.


The spiritual principles we are practicing will guide us, not just in the third step but throughout our recovery. The first three steps provide us with the solid spiritual foundation we will need to work the rest of the steps. We keep our initial surrender alive by actively practicing with the faith, and willingness required to work the third steps. In other words, we limited our powerlessness and are in ability to manage our own lives; we’ve come to believe; now we need to surrender to the care of the God of our understanding.


We may find that willingness to work the third step by remembering where we came from and believe in that where we are going is certainly to be quite different. Though we don’t know what the difference one tell, we know that it is sure to be better than what we’ve had in the past. We rely on our faith and believe that this decision is one of the best decisions we’ve ever made.


Turning our will and our lives over to the care of God of our understanding is a tremendous decision. We may very well wonder exactly how we are supposed to put this decision into practice. Because our individual believes about a power greater than ourselves very, there is no uniform way to put our decision and action. However, we have found some ways we all can use to find a personal understanding of the third step. One is to continue our efforts to develop a personal relationship with the God of our understanding. Another is to give up our efforts at controlling everything around us. We relax our grip on the burdens we’ve been carry in and turn them over to the care of our higher power. Yet another way we practice our third step decision is to continue with our recovery by work and the remainder of the steps. Our sponsor will guide us in applying the spiritual principles of recovery, Just out to shift our focus away from arts own self interest and toward a more spiritual center life.


As we get ready to make this decision, we talk with our sponsor a good to step meetings, and take the opportunity to share about it with other in a members. We gather as much knowledge, insight, and experience as we can from these resources, and then we make our own decisions. No one can do this for us; we must consciously decide to do this for ourselves. Of course, this is not a decision we make solely with our intellect. In truth, this is a choice we make with our hearts, a decision based much more in feeling and desire and in deliberate reasoning. Though the path from mind to heart seems a difficult one, formally working this step with our sponsor seems to help us make this decision a part of who we are.


The search for a guide of our understanding is one of the most important efforts we will undertake in our recovery. We have complete personal choice and freedom and how we understand our higher power. We can each find a higher power that does for us what we cannot do for ourselves. Because we are powerless over our addiction, we need a power greater than ourselves to help us.


Just as our freedom to have a God of our understanding is unlimited, so is our freedom to communicate with their ire power in whatever ways were for us. Anytime we communicate with their ire power, whether it’s simply with our thoughts or allowed at the close of the meeting, we are praying. Most of us asked our higher power for direction on a daily basis.


Our relationship with our higher power grows stronger as we practice faith. In our experience, talking to a power greater than ourselves works. When we are having trouble in a particular area of our lives or when we feel unable to stay clean, our higher power can help; we only need to ask. With our prayers, we ask a power greater than ourselves to care for us. Each time we take this action, we strengthen our faith and our decision to rely on our higher power.


Step three dozen free us from having to take action, but it does liberate us from excessive worry about the results. If we want something/a job, and education, recovery/we have to make the effort to get it. Our higher power will take care of our spiritual needs, but we need to participate in our own lives; we can’t simply sit back and expect God to do everything. We are responsible for our recovery.


Our lives are meant to be lived. No matter how sincere our efforts at turning it over, we will make mistakes, wander off course, and experienced moments of doubt. However, with each setback we are given a new opportunity to renew our commitment to live by spiritual principles. Part of the process of surrendering to God’s will is to surrender to spiritual principles such as honesty, open-mindedness, willingness, trust, and faith. We try to align our actions with what we believe are higher power would want from us, and then we deal with life as it happens.


We may hesitate to work step three in all areas of our lives, especially in matters we want to control. Our experience has been that we tend to hold onto certain areas. Perhaps we think I can control my finances just fine or my relationship is working; why do I need to turn that over to the care of my ire power? Working step three only in certain areas of our lives short circuits are spiritual development. We have found that our recovery benefits when we participate this principle of surrender, to the best of our ability, and all areas of our lives. We strive to work this step thoroughly.


We begin to see positive results from the decision we have made. We began to notice changes. While the circumstances of our lives may not change, the way we deal with those circumstances does. Because we have made the decision to allow spiritual principles to work in our lives, we may notice a sense of relief. We are being relieved of the burden we’ve carried far too long: the need to control everything and everyone. We began to react differently to the situations and people around us. As we gain acceptance, we cease to struggle against life on life terms. Striving to maintain and build on our surrender, we are better able to live and enjoy life in the moment.


For some of us, deciding to Turner will and lives over to the care of the God of our understanding is a process, not an event. However, in making that decision, we do make a commitment to practice this step in our lives. When we are tempted to manipulate the situation, we recall this decision and let go. When we catch ourselves attempting to exert control over someone or something, we stopped in instead asked living guide to help us work this step.


Relinquishing control is not easy, but we can do it with help. With guidance from our sponsor and daily practice, we are sure to find ourselves learning how to get our egos out of the way so our higher power it can work in our lives. Each time we are fearful over a situation, we can turn this step and find the means to walk through our fear without resorting to her old ways.
Recovery doesn’t exempt us from having to live through painful situations.


At some points in our lives, we may have two more the death of a loved one or deal with the end of a relationship. When such things happen to us, we hurt, and no amount of spiritual awareness will take our pain away. We do find, however, that the caring presence of a loving power greater than ourselves will help us get through our pain clean. We may find that we are able to fill our higher Powers presents in the group, in our friends, or in talking to our sponsor. By tapping into that power, we begin to trust and rely on it. We can cease questioning why painful things happen and trust that walking through the difficult times in our lives can strengthen our recovery. We can grow in spite of our pain or, perhaps, in response to it.
Recovery is a process of discovery. We learn about ourselves, and we learn out to cope with the world around us. When we are sincere in our desire to allow our higher power to care for us, we began to gain a sense of serenity.


We notice a gradual change in our thinking. Our attitudes and ideas become more positive. Our world is no longer as distorted by self-pity, denial, and resentment. We are beginning to replace those old attitudes with honesty, faith, and responsibility; as result, we begin to see our world in a better light. Our lives are guided by our emerging integrity. Even though we make mistakes, we become more willing to take responsibility for our actions. We learned that we don’t have to be perfect to live a spiritual life. We work step three with an open mind and heart, we find the results are far beyond our expectations.


As we experience this new way of life, we began to realize that recovery is a priceless gift. We learned to trust; as we do, we open the doors to the intimacy and develop new relationships. Where once we focused only on not using, we now can appreciate the many things that make our lives so valuable. We savor the laughter and the joy we hear expressed so abundantly in our meetings. As recovery becomes more central in our lives and we internalize the principles embodied in the steps, our views of the world changed profoundly. As our awareness grows, so does our appreciation and faith in our power.


If we posit reflect honor lies at this stage of our recovery, we will see that we have experienced dramatic personal growth. The relief we experience as a result of working the first three steps is only a glimpse of our growth we can experience to work in the 12 steps.


The role of third step expands in our lives as we continue work in the other steps. Step 11 ask us to pray for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry it out. Step three begins this process; it is here that we start to see God’s will for us. Moving from self-seeking life to a life based on spiritual principles requires us to change profoundly.


With the help of a loving God, we are ready to move forward on her journey. This is a 12 step program, not a three step program. The decision we made in the third step is perhaps the most month loneliest decision will ever make in our lives, but we need to work the rest of the steps for it to remain meaningful. There is more work to do. We have found that the spiritual path set forth in the 12 steps is only the way to recover a narcotics anonymous. Putting our recovery into action, we work step four.

Copyright © 1993, Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Luckyv2

Step Four



we made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

I work in the first three steps, we have formed a solid foundation for our recovery. Our active addiction can not read name arrested, however, unless we build upon this foundation. As we work the third step, many of us were puzzled: how can we make sure we are really turning our will and our lives over to the care of God? The answer is simple: we work the remainder of the steps, starting with step four.


Why were the four step? After all, we been able to stay clean so far. But some of us are still haunted by driving up obsession to use drugs. Others find that the feelings of discomfort are more subtle: a nagging feeling that something isn't quite right, a sense of impending doom, or feelings of fear and anger that have no apparent reason. Still others may think where doing just fine without a four step. However, our experience as a fellowship has shown that, sooner or later, members who don't work this crucial step relapse.


For many of us, our motivation to work the fourth step is quite simple: we're working a program of recovery and we want to continue. Because our disease involves much more a then drug use, recovery involves more than simple abstinence from drugs. The solution to our problem is a profound change in our thinking and our behavior. We need to change how we perceive the world and alter our role in it. We need to change our attitude. Whether our motivation is a desire to move away from our addiction or to move toward recovery doesn't really matter.


The fourth step is a turning point in our recovery. It is a time for deep personal reflection. The confusion that we attempted to mask was self deception and drugs is about to diminish. We are embarking on a search for insight into ourselves, our feelings, our fears, our resentments, and the patterns of behavior that make up our lives.


We may be very frightened at the prospect of examining ourselves so thoroughly. We don't know ourselves very well, and we may not be sure we want to. Our fear of the unknown may seem overwhelming at this point, but if we recall our faith and trust in our higher power, our fear can be overcome. We believe that part of God's will for us is to work the steps. We trust that the final outcome of working the fourth step will be the continued killing of our spirits, and we go on.


The principles of recovery that we have already begun to practice are vital to work in the fourth step. The honest acceptance of our addiction, brought with us from step one, will help us to be honest about our aspects of our addiction. We've developed a level of trust and faith in a power greater than ourselves, and that glimmer of hope we been feeling is growing with each day clean. We've paved the way to recovery with our willingness, and we find the courage necessary to work the fourth step through living these principles.


Honesty is an essential part of this step. Our years of living a lie must stand. If we sit down and become very quiet with ourselves, we will find it easier to get in touch with the truth. What we currently know to be true, we put on paper, holding nothing back. Telling the truth is a brave act, but with our faith and trust in the God of our understanding, we find Currie at we need to be searching and fearless. With our courage, we're able to put on paper those things we thought we'd never tell.


What is meant by a searching and fearless moral inventory? We take stock of our assets and liabilities. We tried again at the bottom of who we are, to expose the lies we have told ourselves about ourselves. For years, we became whoever we needed to be to survive our addiction. After live in a lifetime of lies, we began to believe those lies. Although we did discover some viable truths and the first step, the fourth step further separates fantasy from reality. We can begin the stock began the person we have invented and find the freedom to be who we are.


If the word moral bothers us, we have found that talking with our sponsor about our reservations can eat our discomfort. A moral inventory doesn't mean that we will condemn ourselves. In reality, they inventory process is one of the most loving things we can do for ourselves. We simply look at our instincts, our desires, our motives, our tendencies, and the compulsive routines that kept us trapped in our addiction. No matter how many days or how many years we have been calling, we are still human and subject to defects in telling. An amatory allows us to look at our basic nature with its flaws and its drinks. We look not only at our imperfections, but also at our hopes, our dreams, our aspirations, and where they may have gone astray. Step four is a big step forward on the path of recovery.


Some of us may want to write or inventory all at once; others spend some time writing each day. Any time we sit down to write we asked our higher power for the Currie at an honesty we need to be thorough and to reveal what we are searching for. In most cases, we are relieved to find that once we begin, the words seem to flow naturally. We need not worry about what we are riding. Our higher power will reveal no more to us than we can handle.


Most of us don't have much experience with the type of self appraisal we are about to do, and we must have guidance and support of our sponsor in order to understand what were done. Our sponsor may give us a format to follow, certain subjects or points to concentrate on, or just general guidance. Not only can our sponsor provide direction for the actual inventory, he or she can encourage us to be courageous, remind us to pray, and be emotionally supportive throughout this process. We often strengthen our relationship with our sponsor a reliant on her or his experience at this time.


Consistent action on our fourth step is important. We can't afford to delay work are amatory. Once we begin writing, we need to continue our inventory until we are done. If we have a tendency to procrastinate, it is a good idea to set aside a certain amount of time each day to work on or inventory. Such a routine establishes our inventory as a high priority in our lives. If we put our fourth step away once we have begun, we run the risk of never returning to it.


We are painstaking and detail oriented and are amatory. We systematically examine all aspects of our lives. We began to see and understand the truth about ourselves, our motives, and our patterns. It is important that we look at more than one dimension of our experience. What motivated us to act the way we did? What repercussions did our behavior have in our lives? How did our behavior affect those around us? How did we harm others? How did we feel about our actions and others' reaction? While these are only a few of the points we address in our inventories, we have found them and other issues like them to be essential areas to examine.


And the fourth step, it is important to take a good hard look at how fear has worked in our lives. Our experience tells us that self-centered fear is at the root of our disease. Many of us have pretended to be fearless when, in fact, we were terrified. Fear has driven us to act rashly and trying to protect ourselves. We have often been paralyzed into in action because of our fears. We may have restored the scheming and manipulating because we feared the future. We went to extremes to protect ourselves from all we saw as potential loss, disaster, and that content lack of what we need. In the past, we had no faith that are higher power would care for us; therefore, we attempted to take control of our lives and everything around us. We use people, we manipulated, we lied, we plotted, we planned, we stole, we cheated, and then we lied some more to cover up our schemes.


We experienced in me, jealousy, and deep, gut wrenching insecurities. We are alone. As we drove away the people who cared about us, we use more drugs, trying to cover up our fillings. The lonelier we felt, the more we try to control everything and everybody. We suffered when things didn't go our way, but so strong was our desire for power and control that we couldn't see the futility of our efforts to manage events. In our new lives, we have faith in a loving God whose will for us is better than anything we could manipulate or control for ourselves. We need not fear what might happen.


In our inventories, we assess the emotional effects of our addiction. Some of us became so skilled at shutting down our fillings with drugs or other distractions that, by the time we came to our first meeting, we had lost touch of our own emotions. In recovery, we learn to identify what we are filling. Naming our fillings is important, for once we do so, we can begin to deal with them. Rather than panicking over how we feel, we can especially say how we're feeling. This gets us away from our limited way of identifying feelings as either good or bad with not much in between.


We made a list of more resemblance, they often play a large part in making our recovery uncomfortable. We cannot allow ourselves to be obsessed with hostility toward others. We look at the institutions that may have affected us: our families, schools, employers, organized religion, law, or jails. We list the people, places, social values, institutions, and situations against which we bear anger. We examine not only the circumstances surrounding these resentments, but we look at the part we played in them. What in us was so threatened that we experienced such deep emotional torment? Often, we will see that the same areas of our lives were affected again and again.


We look at our relationships as well, especially the manner in which we related to our families. We don't do this to place blame for her diction are families. We keep in mind that we are writing an inventory of ourselves, not of others. We write about how we felt about our families and the way we acted on our fillings. In most cases, we will find that the patterns of behavior we established early in the life are what we've carried with us to the present. Some of our old patterns and choices have served us well, while others have not. Through the inventory, we search for the patterns we want to continue and those we want to change.


Writing about all of our relationships is very important, and will want to pay particular attention to our friendships. If we gloss over examining our platonic friendships in favor of focusing on romantic relationships, our inventories will be incomplete. Many of us come to the NA never hearing about a long-term friendship because of conflicts within ourselves. Those conflicts were the real grounds for the arguments we started with our friends and our ensuing refusal to work through the disagreement and continue the friendship. Some of us fell that we would end up getting hurt and in a close relationship, so before that happened, we arranged the end of the friendship ourselves. We may have feared intimacy to such a degree that we were revealed anything about ourselves to our friends. We may have induced guilt and our friends to ensure their loyalty or indole just and other forms of emotional blackmail. If our friends had others in their lives, we may have felt so jealous and insecure that we try to remove the threat of their other friends. Our behavior range from taking our friends hostage to taking them for granted. We may find several instances where we sacrifice our friendships for romantic relationships.


Will probably find identical conflicts and behaviors in our romantic relationships. We'll see the same difficulties with trust, refusal to be vulnerable, and perhaps a lifelong pattern of inability to make commitments. As we write, will most likely see fear of intimacy in each relationship or discover that we've never understood the difference between intimacy and sex. Whether we ran from close relationships because of fear or because we had been her over and over again, we search out the common threads that appear in all our relationships.


We may find that our sexual beliefs and behaviors have caused problems in our relationships. We may have settled for sex when we really wanted love. We may have used sex to get something we wanted or believe that, by having sex, we did extract a commitment from an unwilling partner. We ask ourselves if our sexual behavior has been based in selfishness or in love. We have used sex to fill the spiritual void we felt inside. Some of us felt shame as a result of our sexual practices. After years of compulsively acting on her fears and misguided believes about sex, we want to be at peace with our own sexuality. This is a very uncomfortable topic for most of us. However if we want something different than we have had, it's necessary that we begin the process of change by writing about it.


Some of us were abused. We have been victims of incest or rape. We may have had terrible childhoods of deprivation and neglect. Experiences like these may have led us to inflict the same abuse on others. We may have prostitute ourselves or loud other forms of degradation because we didn't feel that we deserved anything better. Though painful and said, the path cannot be changed. However, the war believes we have developed about ourselves and others can be changed with the help of our higher power. We write about events like these so that we can be free of our most painful secrets in get on with our lives. We don't have to be a lifelong victims of our past.


To experience serenity, we must begin to alter the self-defeating patterns that have rebelled in our lives. The fourth step helps us to identify those patterns. We begin to see how we have maneuvered through life, perhaps not consciously planning our own misery of making choices which result in our life becoming unmanageable. Most of us have blamed various people for the prices we paid for her diction. We didn't want to accept that our addiction had a negative impact that we alone were responsible for. Some of us committed crimes and then complained about the consequences.


Some of us were irresponsible at work and then objected loudly when we were held accountable. We beat a Hassey retreat whenever life caught up with us. Our inventories will help us identify responsibility for our actions and find those circumstances where we tend to place blame elsewhere. Our booklet, working step for narcotics anonymous, can provide more avenues to explore. The quality of our lives depends, to a large degree, on the results of our decisions. As you write at our inventory, we look for the Times when we made decisions that hurt us; we also look for those times when we made decisions that worked out well. If we lived our lives by default, refusing to make any choices, we write about that, too. Those times when we procrastinated until opportunities were menaced and gone, the times when we abandoned it all responsibility, the times when we withdrew and refuse to participate in life -- all are immature material. Most of us had hopes and dreams for ourselves at some point in our lives, but we abandoned those in the pursuit of our addiction. In our inventory, we tried to recall our law streams and find out how our choices and ruined our chances of having those dreams come true. We ask ourselves when we stopped believing in ourselves and when we stop believing in anything outside ourselves. Through this process, our law streams may reawaken.


We dig deep to learn how we lived in conflict with our own morals and values if we believed it was wrong to still and we were still in everything we could get our hands on anyway, what did we do to quiet our anguish? If we believed in monogamy but were unfaithful to our partners, what did we do this so that we could live with our compromise principles? Certainly we use more drugs, but what else? We explore how we felt about ignoring our deepest beliefs. In the process, we discover our last values so that we can begin to rebuild them. And are immature eggs, we will need to be aware of our assets. With most of us be an unaccustomed to looking for our character strings, we might have some trouble with this task. But if we examine our behavior with an open mind, we are sure to find situations where we preserved in the face of adversity, showed concern for others, or even were our spirit triumphed over our diction. We begin to uncover the pier and loving spirit that lies at the core of our being as we look for our character assets. We begin to define our values. We learn what we can do and, more importantly, what we can do if we want to lead productive and fulfilling lives. What we did in our active addiction will not work for us in recovery. Step four allows us to chart a new course for our lives.
The fourth step provides us with the initial insight we need to grow.


Whether we are writing our first inventory or our 20th, we are starting a process that takes us from confusion to clarity, from resentment and forgiveness, from spiritual confinement to spiritual freedom. We can turn to this process again and again. When we are confused, when we are angry, when we have problems that don't seem to disappear, and inventory is a good way to take stock of just where we stand on the path to recovery. After we have written a number of them Tories, we may discover that our first four step merely scratches the surface. As different attitudes and behaviors become apparent to us and later recovery, will want to renew the process of change by working the fourth step again.


The steps are tools we use over and over on her spiritual path. In the process of our recovery, God will reveal more to us as we have the maturity and the spiritual strength to understand it. Over time, the nature of the work we have to do is disclosed to us. As we continued in recovery, we begin to resolve some of the basic conflicts contributing to our addiction. As a paying of old wounds began to fade, we begin to live more fully in the present.


The fourth step allows us to identify the patterns, behaviors, and believes that show us the exact nature of our wrongs. We have written an inventory of ourselves which have revealed what we can change with God's help. To continue the process of change, we move on, make hard missions in step five.




Copyright © 1993, Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Luckyv2

StepFive
"We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."

Now that we have completed our written inventory, it is essential that we share it promptly. The sooner we work our Next word Fifth Step, the stronger the foundation of our recovery will be. We built this foundation on spiritual principles such as surrender, honesty, trust, faith, willingness, encourage; with each step forward in our recovery, we strengthen our commitment to these principles. We reaffirm our commitment to recovery by immediately working Step Five.

Despite her desire to recover, we may find that were feeling frightened at this point. This fear is only natural. After all were about to confront the exact nature of our wrongs, candidly admitting our secrets to God, to ourselves, and to another human being. If we allow our feelings of shame or our fears of change and rejection to stop our process, our problems will only be compounded. If we don't move forward in our recovery, if we cease making every possible effort to recover, we will have given in to the disease of addiction.

We must overcome our fear and worked the Fifth Step if we are to make any significant changes in the way we live. We gather our courage and go on. We may call our sponsor for reassurance. Usually, a reminder that we don't have to face our feelings alone makes all the difference in easing our fears. Working this step with the support of our sponsor and a loving God is a way of putting into practice our decision to allow God to care for her will and our lives. That decision, like most decisions we make, must be followed with action. Following our Third Step decision with the action of the Fourth and Fifth Step will lead to a closer relationship with our Higher Power.

Our understanding of the spiritual principles we have practiced in the first four steps will be enhanced by work and that Fifth Step. We experienced honesty by make an admission, just as we did in Step One, but we experience it on a deeper level. The admission we are about to make to ourselves in Step Five is especially important. Not only do we open up and tell the truth about ourselves, we also hear this admission from our own lips, breaking the pattern of denial that has plagued us for so long. We find new levels of honesty, especially self honesty, when we squarely face the results of our diction and see the reality of our lives. The risk we take in the step increases our trust in God and urges the faith and hope we first experience in Step Two. We take our willingness a step further thereby rendering the decision we made in Step Three. We draw on the courage we acquired in Step For and find that we are far more brave than we ever dreamed possible. This bravery is demonstrated not bar a lack of fear by the action we take in spite of our fear. We set a time to share our inventory, and we show up and share at the scheduled time.

Another action which requires courage is our mission to ourselves. We need to focus particular attention on this aspect of the Fifth Step. If we don't, we may find the benefits we derived from the step are not as meaningful as they would have been. As our Basic Text states, "Step Five is not simply a reading of Step Four." We want to make sure we are acknowledging and accepting the exact nature of our wrongs. We can even formalize this admission to ourselves if we think it will help. However, the manner in which we'd make this admission to ourselves is not as important as the action itself. We gain a new understanding of the principle of humility as we work this step. We've most likely been under the impression that we were somehow bigger or more visible than other people. Through working the Fifth Step, we find that few of our actions deserved exaggerated attention. Through our self-disclosure, we feel connected with humanity, perhaps for the first time.

As we share our most personal fillings and are most carefully guarded secrets, we make experienced anguish. However, many of us have looked up and seeing unconditional love in the eyes of the person hearing our Fifth Step. The fillings of acceptance and belonging we experienced at that moment helped us to feel a part of the program.

The knowledge that we are about to face fillings we have long avoided may cause a rise in our anxiety level, but we go on, encouraged by our sponsor to trust the God of our understanding. The first thing we must realize is that the Fifth Step is not a quick fix for a painful situation. If we work this step expecting our fillings to go away, we are expecting the steps to numb us the way drugs did. We review our first four steps and see that their purpose is to awaken our spirits, not dead in our fillings. We will need support and understanding to cope with our fillings. If we choose an understanding individual to make our commissions to, we will have all the support we need.

Although there is no requirement that the listener must be our sponsor, most of us choose to share our inventory with him or her. By doing so, we are most likely to benefit from the full range of experience another recovering addict has to share. After all, who can better understand what we are tempting than those who have done it for themselves? Ad takes more experienced in recovery than we are will already have dealt with their matters we are just beginning to face. Such people can share with us their experience and the solutions that they have found to work in the step. The bond we share with our sponsor will strengthen our connection with the program and increase her sensible longing.

The person who listens to our Fifth Step should be someone who understands the process of recovery we are involved in and someone who is willing to help us through it. We have found that an ideal listener will have enough compassion to honor our fillings, enough integrity to respect our confidence, and enough insight to help us keep the exact nature of our wrongs within our field of vision. Knowing that we are sharing our inventory, she or he will help us to avoid getting sidetracked by blaming others for the things we've written about in our Fourth Step.

Although we know we are going to do the ride meaningful benefits from work in the step, we may still need to take a moment of reaffirming our surrender in the decision we made in the Third Step. We can ask a Power greater than ourselves for the honesty, courage, and willingness to work this step. To them by God into this process, we may want to say a prayer. The prayer can be anything that reaffirms our commitment to recovery. Praying with the person hearing our Fifth Step can be a profound intimate experience.

Not only do we prayed to ask for strength and courage, many of us also ask our Higher Power to listen as we may guard mission. Why is it so important that we also make our admission to God? Because this is a spiritual program, and our whole purpose is to awaken spiritually our willingness to approach our gap higher Power with our past and who we are is central to our recovery. In the past, some of us felt that we weren't worthy of a relationship with God. Our secrets blocked our ability to feel an acceptance and love from that Power. When we reveal something about ourselves, we draw closer to our Higher Power and experience the unconditional love and acceptance which springs from that Power. The feeling that the God of our understanding accepts us, no matter what we've done, and enhances our acceptance of ourselves. The positive relationship where building with a Higher Power carries over into our relationships with others as well.

We may be surprised by the intensity of the partnership with our development with our sponsor as we share our inventory. If we've never really been listening before, we may be startled to discover that we are being asked questions about some fine points of our personal history or that our sponsor is jotting down notes while we share. Our self-esteem increases as we realize that what we have to share is worth such close attention. We may seed deep compassion and our listener’s eyes, showing us that our pain is understood. That compassion is one more assurance of the presence of a Power greater than ourselves.

Looking at and sharing that exact natures of our wrongs is not likely to be a comfortable activity. We have looked back and seeing how repeating the same patterns over and over again has kept us stuck in the same place. And we haven't just seeing the surface behavior; we've seen the defects of character that have been behind our behavior all along. We start to realize that there is a difference between our actions and the exact nature of our wrongs. Per instance, we may see example after example of situations where we lied to in a vain attempt to make everyone liked us. But those examples aren't the nature of our wrongs. The nature of the wrongs is the dishonesty and manipulation we were demonstrating each time we lied. If we look beyond the dishonesty and manipulation, will most likely find that we are afraid no one would like us if we told the truth.

As we share our inventory, our sponsor will sometimes share some of his or her own experience with us. Our sponsor may cry with us or smile and recognition at some of the struggles we are now sharing. We may laugh together as we share some of the more comical aspects of our diction and the ridiculous lies we told ourselves so that we could continue to live as we were living. As we see how similar our fillings are to our sponsor's fillings, we realize that there are other people like us. We're human being, nothing more, nothing less. Our self-obsession blinded us to this, making us feel unique. Suddenly we understand that other people, to, have painful problems and that our us are no more significant than anyone else's. Filling can take place when we see a glimpse of ourselves in the eyes of another. We find new melody in that moment and a reason to hope that the serenity and peace we have been striving for our within our reach at last.

Our fillings are alienation fade as we experience an emotional connection with another human being. We are allowing someone entry to those places we've never before opened to another person. This may be the first time we've ever trusted another person enough to tell her or him about ourselves and allow that person to get to know us. We may be surprised at the closeness that develops between us and our sponsor. We're developing a give-and -take relationship based on a quill it he and mutual respect, the kind that we can last for a lifetime.

After work and our fist step, we may fill little raw up or emotionally vulnerable. We've taken of major step in the healing process of recovery. This process could be thought of as "surgery on the spirit". We've "loans. We've exposed our most carefully constructed lies for the deceptions they were common and we told ourselves and painful truths. We dropped our mask in the presence of another person.

At this point, we may experience a dangerous urge to run from our new awareness and return to the familiar misery of the past. We may feel tempted to avoid our sponsor because he or she knows all about us now. It is very important that we resist such impulses. We must talk with other recovering addicts about our fears and billing so we can hear the experience they have been share. We'll find out what were gone through is not unique and feel relieved when others tell us they went through the very same struggles after they worked their Fifth Step.

Our awareness of our patterns of relating with others and the risks we have just taken in admitting them to another brain about a momentous breakthrough in our relationships. Not only do we form a close bond with our sponsor, but the risk we take and trusting this person will help us develop a close relationship with others as well. We risk trusting one person with our secrets and our feelings, and we haven't been rejected. We began to have the freedom to trust others. Not only do we find out that others are trustworthy and deserve our friendship, we find that we are also trustworthy and deserving. We may have thought we were incapable of loving or BN loved or even having friends. We discovered that these bit believes were unfounded. We learned, from the example of our sponsor, how to be a more caring friend.

Our relationships begin to change after this step, including the one we are having with the God of our understanding. Throughout the process of the Fifth Step, we turned to the Power when we were fearful, and we received the carriage we needed to complete this step. Our belief that our faith grew as a result. Because of this, were willing to put more of ourselves into building a relationship with God. Just like any other relationship, the one we develop with our Hire Power calls for open-mindedness and trust on our part. When we share our most personal thoughts and feelings with our Hire Power, leading down her walls in admitting we are less than perfect, intimacy develops. We develop a certainty that our Higher Power is always with us and that we are being cared for.

The process we have undertaken so far has made us aware that the exact nature of our wrongs. The exact nature of those wrongs is her character defects. We know now that these patterns of our lives were rooted in dishonesty, fear, selfishness, and many other defects of character. We had seen the whole spectrum of our defects and are ready for something new. With this readiness, we move on to the Step Six.





Copyright © 1993, Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

Gmoney

This part gets overlooked so very often.

SaTiT

Appropriate...another piont of view..mmm maybe another
human being can give me another perspective in the exact nature
of my wrongs.
what is the exact nature of my wrongs ? Miss appropricate use
of my life ? Miss appropriate re-actions of my charecter.

Such as the word pride...is it wrong for me to have pride ?
or is becuase the exact nature of my wrongs is my miss impurpretation
of pride verse ego and i react weird becuase I'm a little confused
or not applying the appropriate translations. Such as taking things out of
context.

Such as in guilt...should we not feel guilty or remoseful for something
we mototively done wrong, knowing we done wrong.

Is it appropricate to feel guilt and shameful for something that we had
no control over..like trying to save another addict and we fail and fail again.

What is the exact nature of our wrongs ?..can we distinguish the different
between the two circumstance.

Such as a child deveploing servival skills in order to cope or servive
in an abussive enviorment or home.
As the child truns into an adult, that servival reactions is not healthy
or is no longer appropriate in his/her adult life.

The base line of addiction is servival. We don't know how to truly live.
addictions or drugs abuse keeps us in something familar.
Most addicts are servivalist...why ? what went wrong ?
Why do we continue to drive with a flat tire ?

Gmoney

In NA, yes we can. That is...if we pay close attention to what the literature tells us. Pride is a response. Guilt is a response. Shame is a response. Our responses or reactions aren't the exact nature because there's something that lies deeper...something that causes these reactions. I could provide specific quotes from various chapters in the literature, but I won't. I'll just say that it's in there for whomever wants to know.

REZ

Yes, it is very important to get out the exact nature of our wrongs. For me, that means I need to examine questions like: "why did I do this? How did it affect others? How did it affect me?" The WHY part usually goes to my psyche and my character defects. I have know many people who write a fourth step in which they list pages and pages of every bad thing they ever did, but they don't dig beneath the surface to ask why. This method of doing the 4th step may be useful in getting some things off your chest and relieving some guilt, but it may not be very useful in helping you with the spiritual growth that goes on in steps 6 and 7.

Luckyv2

I will be posting the rest of the It Works How And Why when I get them finished this is quite a process and is all copyrighted material so anything that I have posted is from our NA literature just a reminder. Nothing that I have posted is my own words I am not that smart

SaTiT

why? Cuz i need to know.lol
Something about my obsessive and complusive behaviors.
Un resolved anger, unresolved emotions or emotional drawf
or closures.

My sponsor (another human being) gave me another perspective
and an answer....he said " becuase I like it".lol
Yes, my defects of charectors is dystructive and unhealthy...but I like it.lol

Honestly is not the extact nature of wrongs when it comes to
using drugs itself...is that i like it. I'll do whatever it takes to get
high becuase i like it. Is not drug abuse just the symtoms of
my deeper problems. Is not abussing drugs a glimps of my charector ?
Can I honestly addmit the i like driving on a flat tire and my life had become
unmanable ? Can I honestly admit that i like it as i did with the drugs.

Can i apply my experince of the previouse steps to the proceeding steps.
In other words...did I stopped using until i was willing to do so ?
mmmm...would i stop acting or reacting to the veriouse charector traits
until i"m willing to do so or have had enough ? or I'm addicted to them as will ?

Honestly...how much power do i have over my charector defects ?
Dose it say for me to remove my shortcomings or my HP ?
And how did i became willing to stop using ?....I hit a bottom.
mmm..would it take another type of a bottom for me to be willing.lol

How long will this process go on ?lol
So..can i be at peace with it..knowing i'm not going to be perfect and
some of my flaws or any of them might not even be moved.
But also knowning this..having peace within myself..would i not react as much ?lol
Or maybe..I've get creative and trun a negative into a posistive ?

Gmoney

Thanks Rez...you hit the nail right on the head!!

When I was new, I heard an oldtimer share that the only way we can get to the "exact nature" is to continuosly explore 'WHY' we do what we do. I mean, it is about being exact, isn't it? He said, when we can no longer answer 'why'...it's a good bet that we've reached the exact nature. Let's look at some of the questions SaTiT asked:

Why? Could it be laziness because you don't want to do things for yourself? Could it be you expect others to bail you out of jams you put yourself in? Could it be the core of the disease (self-centeredness)?

We can talk about what we did and how we felt till the cows come home, but talking about that surface stuff doesn't help us to acknowledge the patterns of thinking that preceed our reactions or responses.

Luckyv2

Step Six



"We are entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."

The insight we gain from Step Five regarding the exact nature of our wrongs, while Bayou bowl, is only the beginning of the striking changes that take place in our lives as we move on to Step Six. That mission we made of the nature of our wrongs, our character defects, is necessary if we are to be ready to have them removed. Deeply shaken by our part in the past, we can expect our attitude to be profoundly changed by working the Sixth Step.


Although some of us have not understood the critical importance of the Sixth and Seventh Steps, they are essential actions that must be taken if we expect to make any significant and lasting changes in our lives. We cannot simply say, "Yes, I'm ready. Backspace, God, please remove my defects" and go on to Step Eight. If we gloss over the Sixth and Seven steps and go on to make our amends, we will only wind up owing more amends by repeating the same destructive patterns as before.


The lifelong process of the Six Step is just that -- a process. We started the process of becoming entirely ready, and we will strive to increase our readiness throughout our lifetime. Our job is to become entirely ready and to open our hearts and minds to the deep internal changes that can only be brought about by the presence of a loving God.



We've already had experience in the Third Step with what we must do now in this Sixth Step. Just as we surrendered our will and lives to a care of a Power Greater than ourselves because we could no longer go on managed in our own lives, now we prepare to surrender our defects of character to a loving God because we have exhausted our chance to change our own willpower. This process is difficult and often painful.


Our growing awareness of our defects often causes us pain. We've all heard the expression "ignorance is bliss," but we are no longer ignorant of our character defects, and this awareness hurts. All of a sudden, we will notice the wounded look in the eye of a friend after we've acted on one of our less endearing triads. We'll hang our heads in shame, mumbled apology, and probably beat ourselves inwardly for being so callous one more time. We feel sick inside; knowing our actions adversely affected the people in our lives. We are sick and tired of being the people we have seen, but this filling compels us to change and grow. We want to be different than we have been in the past, and the good news is that we already are. Being able to see beyond our own interests and being concerned about the feelings of others are striking changes, considering that are raging self -- obsession is at the core of our disease.


We are likely to feel very frustrated as we noticed that our defects are getting in the way of our recovery. We may attempt to suppress them ourselves by either denying their existence or hiding them from others. We may think that if no one knows about them, are more an unattractive characteristic will go away. What we must do, rather than try to exert power and control over our defects, is to step out of the way and allow a loving God to work in our lives. One part of this process involves becoming responsible for our behavior.


When we are confronted with her character defects, either by our own insight or by someone we have hurt, we begin to take complete responsibility for our actions. We

don't avoid responsibility by saying something like, "well, God has a remove that defect yet" or "I'm powerless over my defects, and that's just the way I'm going to be." We accept responsibility for our behavior -- good, bad, or indifferent. We no longer have our drug use or our ignorance as an excuse to be irresponsible.


When we honestly admit our wrongs, we find humility. The humility we experience as Step Five grows as we again since our humanness and realize that we are never going to be perfect. We accept ourselves a little bit more, we surrender, and our willingness to change increases dramatically. We have already experienced remarkable changes in our emotional and spiritual nature to our continuous efforts to live by the principles contained in the previous steps. Despite our lack of familiarity with the realm of the Spirit, you must remember that, and Steps One through Three, we were given the basic tools we need to negotiate the path of recovery. We carry with them as the honesty it to the to make our initial surrender, the faith and hope we rebuilt in coming to believe in a Power Greater than ourselves, and the willingness and trust required from us when we make our decision to turn our will and lives over to the care of God. Our hearts were touched by the humility of believe in that Power.


On the spiritual foundation we lay the principles of commitment and perseverance as we work to Sixth Step. We need the willingness to make a commitment to pursue a recovery despite the continued presence of character defects in our lives. We mustn't give up, even when we think no change has taken place. We are often blind to our own internal changes, but we can rest assured that what's happening inside as is evident on outside to others. Our job is to keep on walking, even though it may feel as though each step requires more strength than we can muster. No matter how difficult our process, we must preserve. We can make use of the sheer grit and tendency it takes to maintain our active addiction by being steadfast and strong in our efforts to sustain our recovery.

Haven't written our inventory and shared it with ourselves, the God of our understanding, and another human being, we become aware of our defects of character. With the help of our sponsor, we write a list of those defects and focus on how they manifest themselves in our lives. Our character defects are based human traits that have been distorted out of proportion by her self -- centeredness, causing enormous pain to us and those around us.



Take a defects such as self -- righteousness, for example, and imagine it again is normal, an inflated state -- confident belief in one's own values. Strong, confident, and well-rounded people have formed bayous and principles to live by and believe deeply in their rightness. Such people live what they believe and share those bullies with others in a non--- critical way when asked. Confidence in our belief is essential. Without it, we would be when she -- watching, unsure of our decisions, and probably somewhat immature in our dealings with the world. Confident beliefs become ugly self -- righteousness when we insist that others live by our values. Attempting to enforce our instances live manipulating or exploding others makes this defect even uglier.


Or consider fear. The absence of fear in the face of a personal attack, catastrophic illness, or potential injury would signal insanity rather than serenity! We all have fears -- a being alone, of not having our physical needs met, of dying, and many others. But when our fears become obsessively self -- centered, when we spend all our time protecting ourselves from what might happen, we can no longer deal effectively with life in the here and now.

As we work to Step Six, bridging the vast gulf that lies between fear and courage requires a great deal of willingness and trust on our part. Our fears of what we will be like without relying on the destructive behavior of our past must be overcome. We will need to trust our Higher Power to remove our defects of character. We must be willing to take a chance what lies beyond the Sixth Step is going to be better than our current stock of fears, resentments, and spiritual anguish. When the pain of the remaining of the same becomes greater than our fear of change, we will surely let go.



We may wonder what will happen to us without the use of what we may see as survival skills. After all, interactive addiction, our self -- centeredness protected us from feeling guilty and enabled us to continue our drug use without regard for those around us. Our denials protect us from seeing the wreckage of our lives. Our selfishness made it possible for us to do whatever it took to continue in our insanity. But we no longer need these "skills." We have a set of principles to practice that are much more appropriate to our new way of life.


As a writer list of character defects and see how they have been at the root of our troubles, we need to open -- minded about how our lives would be without these defects. If one of our character defects is dishonesty, we can think about situations in our lives where we normally lie and imagine how it would feel to tell the truth for a change. If we put some effort into this exercise, we may feel a sense of relief at the possibility of a life free from having to cover small deceits within major fabrications and all the complications inherent in dishonesty. Or, if we find that defects based in laziness and procrastination, we can visualize leaving behind our marginal existence and move on to a life of realized ambitions, new arises, and unlimited possibilities.


In addition to our hopes and dreams for the future, we may find in our sponsor or other news recovery we admire more concrete examples of those assets for which we are striving. If we know members who are exhibiting the spiritual assets we want to obtain, we can use them as an example for ourselves. What we hope to become as evidenced all around us and recovering addicts living by spiritual principles. Our sponsor and other members share the freedom they have found from their defects of character, and we have faith that we wanted for them will also happen for us.

Even so, we may still go through a period of mourning over the loss of our illusions and old ways. Sometimes giving up those outdated survival skills feel like giving up our best friend. We do, however, need to surrender our reservations, excuses, rationalizations, and self -- deceptions and go forward into recovery with their eyes wide open. We are completely aware that there is no turning back, because we can never forget the miracle that's begun to happen to us. Our bruised and battered spirits have started to heal in the course of working the steps.


Part of the process of becoming entirely ready and involves practicing constructive behavior. Because we now understand and recognize our destructive behaviors, will find a willingness to practice constructive behaviors instead. For instance, if were hurt somehow, we don't have to grow up in a ball of self -- pity, complaining about how what a rotten deal we got. Instead, we can accept what is and work toward finding solutions. The more we do this, the more we form a habit of thinking constructively. It becomes

natural to begin examining alternatives, setting goals, and following through in the face of adversity. We don't have this band sulking or pointlessly complaining about circumstances beyond our control. We may even surprise ourselves with our cheer and optimism at times, and it's no wonder, considering how foreign such attitudes add the end to most of us!

There may still be times when we fill that entirely too much is being asked of us. Many of us have exclaimed, "You mean I even have to tell the truth about that?" Or "if only I could still lie, steal, or cheat, it would be so much easier to get what I want." Were torn between the unprincipled ways of our addiction and the character -- building principles of recovery. While, at first glance, it may seem easier to manipulate outcomes or avoid consequences, we know that we can't afford the price we would have to pay. The resulting saint, regret, and lots of spiritual contentment would far outweigh any thing we might possibly gain by compromising our principles.

Group holding the principles of recovery, we seek a life of harmony and peace. The energy we once put into the care of feeding our character defects can now be put into neutral and theme are spiritual goals. The more kids we focus on our spiritual nature, the more it will unfold in our lives.


We will not, however, that achieve a state of spiritual perfection, regardless of how diligently we applied the Sixth Step to our lives. We will most likely see the defects we deal with today manifest themselves in variety of ways throughout our lifetime. Even after years of recovery, we may fill the vast hated at the reappearance of some old defects we thought had been removed. We are humbled by our imperfection -- but let there be no mistake; humility is the ideal state for an addict to be in. Humility brings us back down to earth implants or be firmly on the spiritual path we are walking. We smile at our delusion of perfection and keep on walking. We're on the right path, headed in the right direction, and each step we take brings new progress.


We gain more tolerance from the defects of those around us we work the step. When we see someone acting out on a defect that we have acted on ourselves, we fill compassionate rather than judgmental, for we know it does exactly how much pain such behavior causes. Rather than condemning the behavior of another, we look at ourselves. Have an experience in accepting ourselves; we can escape compassion and tolerance to others.


We ask ourselves if we're entirely ready to have God remove all of our defects -- every single one. If any reservations exist, if we feel the need to clean to any defect, we pray for willingness. We open our spirits to the killing we found in Narcotics Anonymous and use the resources of our recovery to do our best each moment. Although the process lasts a lifetime, we only live in the present day. We've taken a giant step forward in the process of recovery, but it must be followed with another to be truly lasting. With the readiness we have at hand, we go on to Step Seven.

Copyright © 1993, Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

SaTiT

The core of the disease is obsession .

As in obsesses of being right all the damn time. (defencesive mechanism, servival)
As in obsesses of fear of lossing control.

Just becuase I'm a workalcohilc dosn't mean I'm well or equal recovery.lol
Obvioulsey if I'm a workalholic..i'm not lazy.lol

as in I get high to escape
It's call an escape..i don't work like normal people..i work to escape.
I can't go shoping an buy things and just enjoy them..I do it to escape.
I can't rest like normal people..I cralw into bed to escape.
I can't go gambling like normal people do..i gamble to escape.
I can't play my music like normal people do..I play my music to escape.

it's not what i do ..it's why i do them.

Why the hell would I feel like i have to escape all the damn time ?
Something went wrong somewhere...i don't know...like some ***** bashing
my head in when i was a kid for no particular reasons
and i learned to numb myself out through escape to servived...long, long before drugs ever came around.

Gmoney

I agree with you, SaTiT. Maybe I shouldn't have used the word "you" when providing an example based on the question you asked. I could have easily said "me" or "I" and made the same point. I hope you didn't take it like I was talking about you specifically, because I wasn't.

I realize Chance is using this thread to share what the literature says about the 12 steps, and I don't want to veer too far off course here - yet NA tells us (not Garry) that the spiritual part of our disease is our total self-centeredness, and obsession and compulsion are the other two aspects of this 3-fold disease. NA says self-centered fear is at the core. NA also tells us that we don't have to be right all the time, but in cases where we are right...we can allow others to be wrong. For me, the defensiveness is exhibited when people who are wrong can't stand to be shown they're wrong. The issue, for me, isn't so much about those who try to enlighten as it is about those who refuse enlightenment. So, I guess we agree again.

LOL!!! Chance...it says, "...while valuable.." LMAO!!! What version do you have?

SaTiT

no..don't trip .lol
i know i can get lazy. underneath all of my defects is me bascailly
not taking responsiblities for myself. My codependcy issues it just
another form of denial. Which is some of my shortcomings...i can't really
compair my defects with others..but there's that common thread
or similarities. i just have to learn how to apply the answers in the message
to my circumstance.

Bascailly codependency for me is just another form of escape.
I can deal with other's problems as long as i don't have to deal with mine..
if that make sence.

it a little bit cunning thou..because i'm thinking i was doing the right
thing. kind of like..we get the job back, we get the relationship back
dosn't equal recovery..but isn't that one of the reason why we wanna
recover.

being an ACOA..i spend alot of my time obsessing about being normal,
trying to be normal. Some of the issues didn't even effect me in earily
recovery..it came up and bit me in the ass years later.
My HP deem it was time for me to let go of my deep pain or shortcomings.
I guess in a sence i had to heal or recovered enough to face issues
i wasn't capible of facing in earily recovery.

A lot of it is maybe becuase i 've leaned enough to love myself
and not beat up as much. So i'm able to see things in a new light
as I face certain issues. There's also more trust the I've
gain with my HP. becuase some of the stuff is like PTSD and it can
get pretty hairy.

the 7th step has always been my hardest step. i struggle with this one.
Some people say .."just say your prayers and go"...i go round and round
with it almost obsessiving bout it sometimes.

Luckyv2

That reminds me of my news letter that I used to do for our Group. LOL I would always make sure that there was some sort of mistake because there is always someone around to point it out to ya

next step

Luckyv2

"We humbly ask him to remove our shortcomings."

In Step For, when covered the basic defects of her character. In Step By, we admitted their existence. In Step Six, we became entirely ready to have them removed so that we could experience continued spiritual growth and recovery. Now, in Step Seven, we humbly ask our Hire Power to remove our shortcomings. When we ask our Hire Power to remove these shortcomings, we asked for freedom from anything which limits are recovery. We asked for help because we cannot do it alone.

To work in the previous steps, we see that attaining humility is necessary if we are going to live a clean life and walk a spiritual path. An attitude of humility is not the same as humiliation, nor is it a denial of our good qualities. On the contrary, an attitude of humility means that we have a realistic view of ourselves and our place in the world. And they Seventh Step, humility means understanding our role in our own recovery, appreciating our strengths and limitations, and having faith in the Power Greater than ourselves. To work that Seventh Step, we must get out of the way so that God can do God's work. Humbly ask in for the removal of our shortcomings means we're giving complete license to that loving Power to work in our lives, believing that God's wisdom far exceeds our own.

Even though we now possess some major of humility, many of us may be somewhat confused by the word "humbly." We may have taken it for granted that God would remove our shortcomings immediately upon request. Those of us with this attitude may have been surprised when our Ire Power didn't comply with our requests. On the other hand, some of us tried pleading with God to remove our shortcomings, guessing that would be a demonstration of humility.

We tried so hard to get it right. We were tired of our shortcomings. We were worn out from trying to manage and control them, and we wanted some really. Oddly enough, this is precisely the attitude we hope to demonstrate in Step Seven, the attitude of humility. We admit defeat, recognize her limitations, and asked for help from the God of our understanding.

Asking our Hired Power to remove large short -- Cummings requires a surrender of a more pronouns nature than our initial surrender. That's surrender, warned of sheer despair over our powerlessness and inability to manage our lives, moves into an entirely new realm in the seventh step. In this new level of surrender, we accept not only our addiction but also the shortcomings related to our addiction. Excepting our addiction was the first move in the direction of excepting ourselves. We know something about ourselves because of our work in the previous steps, and her limitations of uniqueness have been overcome in the process. We know that we are neither more nor less important than anyone else. Understanding that we are not unique is a good indication of humility.

Patience is a sensual greedy and I were convinced that. We may have difficulty with the notion of patience because our addiction accustomed us to instant gratification. But we've already been practicing the principles that make it possible for us to be patient. We simply need to expand our Third Step decision to trust the God of our understanding with our will and our lives. If we only trust that Power to a certain extent in Step Three, it's time to increase our trust.

Because our view of what we can hope for may be limited, many of us can't even begin to imagine what are Hire Power has in store for us. If this is a case for us, we must rely on faith. As in the previous steps, we simply have to believe that God's will for us is good. Our faith gives us reason to hope for the best.

And work in this step, we move away from intellectualizing the recovery process. Our concern is not to determine exactly how or when our shortcomings will be removed. It's not our job to analyze his step. This tip is a spiritual choice, a choice that goes beyond any emotional reaction or conscious act of will. To choose to bypass it would leave us with only a heightened awareness of our character defects and no hope for relief from those shortcomings. The resulting pain might well be unbearable.

We've seen her character defects, are faulty belief systems, and are unhealthy patterns of behavior. We've seen that we need to change a may not be aware that we been changing since we first came to Narcotics Anonymous for help. We walked into our first meeting with the spiritual void. Some essential ray of spiritual light has been cut off. We had lost the ability to love, to laugh, and to fill. For so long, people had looked into her eyes and had trouble seeing the human being behind the blank gaze. From our very first meeting, we sense the love and acceptance of other Narcotics Anonymous members. We began to come back to life. What we are experiencing is an awakening of the spirit -- no less dramatic than it sounds. This awakening has been evident to those around us for quite some time, but the changes now so obvious that we can see it as well.

When the changes we see is that our relationship with the God of our understanding. Previously, we may have felt that God was far removed and did not have much to do with us on a personal level. We may have had trouble grasping the fact that each one of us could have a God of our understanding and always available to us. Prayer may have felt artificial for quite a while, but we may now stands that we are being listened to and loved when we pray.

Develop a relationship with God of our understanding goes a long way toward increasing our level of comfort when we asked to have our shortcomings removed. The work we've done in the previous step have enriched that relationship. We've asked our Hire Power for honesty, open -- mindedness, and willingness, and we have been provided with the ability to develop those attributes that are so vital to our recovery.

Each time we come short of many of the qualities we are trying to attain or when we have difficulty practicing spiritual principles, we turn to the God of our understanding. In this step, we ask a loving God to remove our inpatients, our intolerance, our dishonesty, or whatever shortcoming is currently in the way. We find that our Hire Power always provides us with what we need, and our faith grows as a result. When we asked our Hire Power to remove our shortcomings, we may see little bits of some of them removed. Other defects may simply be shoved a crowd of the way for a time so that we can move forward on the path to recovery. We may even that same complete freedom from having to act on those defects. The point is that we have come to believe that only the God of our understanding has the power to remove or shortcomings. We can actually ask our Are Power to remove or shortcomings in good faith, knowing that it will happen in God's time. This faith can transcend our own ideas of what we need are think we should have.

Regardless of how secure we feel in our relationship with God of our understanding, we need are sponsored a guidance through the Seventh Step. Our sponsor helps us with the understanding of humility and in finding a comfortable way of communicating with our Higher Power.

We need to remember that we are praying to a Power greater than ourselves. We asked humbly, knowing that we are powerless. Some of us will reside a formal prayer that demonstrates humility when we asked our Higher Power to help us. Some of us will pray in a more casual manner, just as humbly, but using our own words. Any communication with our Higher Power is prayer. However we choose to communicate with the God of our understanding, we fill a certain comfort come over us as we pray. We know that we are being cared for.

With this knowledge comes freedom. Though not a cure by any means, work in the Seventh Step gives us the freedom to choose. We know that if we live by the spiritual principle the recovery, we no longer need to wear ourselves out trying to rein situations and outcomes. We trust the God of our understanding with our lives. We may still be fearful from time to time, but we no longer have to react to fear indestructible ways. We have the freedom to choose to act constructively or, when appropriate, do nothing at all. Believing that we are being cared for is a result of develop in a relationship with the Are Greater than ourselves. We are in the process of developing a conscious contact with the Higher Power. We will strive to improve that contact throughout our lives. We are conscious of the God of our understanding and feel that Power's presence.

The process of the Seventh Step rings about a piece of mind that we never dreamed possible. We sense that will is present throughout our search for spiritual growth is our ability to fill our Higher Powers loved for us. We glimpse the vision of complete freedom from our shortcomings. It doesn't matter what we will not attain a state of perfection or complete humility in our life. The ability to contemplate this grand vision and meditate upon it are rare and priceless gifts in their own right.

We are being changed. We've not only heard about the miracle recovery; we are becoming living, breathing examples of what that power of the Narcotics Anonymous program can do. This approach alive has ceased to be a theory we hear about in the meeting; it is now become a tangible reality. We can see America will simply by looking in the mirror. They got a rather standing has taken us from spiritually unconscious, hopeless addicts to a spiritually aware, recovering addicts either to live. Although we've reached this point, the damage caused by our shortcomings need to be addressed. Desiring continued recovery in freedom, we go on to Step Eight and began to make amends for the damage we've caused.

Gmoney

I hear you man... I think we all can get a good dose of laziness from time to time. When I used the example you offered of driving around with a flat tire, the first thing I thought of was laziness, procrastination, indolence, apathy...ya know...that kind of stuff. I mean, why else would anyone of us refuse to deal with what's right in front of us? Keeping the focus on me, when I cut through all the excuses and rationalizations it usually boils down to me not wanting to do what I need to do because it doesn't provide me with instant gratification. If I put it off for a while, maybe it will just go away. If I act as if it's not my job to do it, maybe someone else will do it for me. If I act as if I don't really care, maybe someone who cares more than I do will do it so I don't have to. In a nutshell, the "exact nature" is that I'm self-centered and want what I want when I want it. The "King Baby" syndrome. If it doesn't feel good or provide a reward...f_ _k it!!

All the defects of character that I can list are expressions of my self-centeredness. When I'm impatient it's because things aren't going as fast as I'd like them to go. When I'm intolerant it's because people aren't behaving as I'd want them to. When I'm fearful it's because I don't know whether things will go my way or not - fantasy in reverse. When I'm resentful it's because I'm reliving an incident that didn't go my way over and over again in my head. Once I can recognize why I do what I do, I no longer have an excuse to use for my reactions or responses. Step 4 is about learning who we are and acknowledging our faulty perceptions and warped thinking patterns. It's also about acknowledging our good points as well. In step 5 we admit why we do what we do, and in Step 6 we accept responsibility and make a committment to changing our lives for the better. In Step 7, we simply understand that we have a part to play in enhancing our positives and minimizing our negatives. Accepting that we are human, we do our best and leave the results to our HP.

My defects have not been removed - just arrested. My life is better simply without the drugs. I got the job, the home, the "symbols of success" - and sure, it's part of why I recover. Yet, looking back...I had all those things before and my life wasn't nearly as serene as it is today. By working on the inside stuff I've learned to expect less and give more. I've learned to see myself coming before I get there because I know myself so much better. I've learned how to step up to the plate and handle situations as they present themselves (most of the time). I've learned to separate my needs from my wants, and as a result, I don't have to ride around with a flat because I know the tire will only get worse if I do.

Luckyv2

Step Eight

"We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all."

In the previous steps, we began to make peace with our Higher Power and with ourselves. In the Eighths Step, we begin the process of making peace with ourselves.

By acting on her character defects, we inflicted harm on ourselves and those around us. In the Seventh Step, we asked our Higher Power to remove or a short -- comings. However, in a word again to freedom from our defects, we need except responsibility for them. We need to do whatever we can to repair the arm we've done. And Step Eight, we begin to rectify our wrongs. We begin to accept responsibility for our actions by listing all the people we have harmed in by become a willing to make amends to them all.

While our efforts to make amends may make a difference in the lives of those we have harmed, this process has its greatest impact on our own lives. Our object is to begin clearing away the damage we've done so that we can continue on our spiritual awakening. By the time we work our way through the process of making amends, we will surely be astounded by the level of freedom we feel.

We are involved in the process designed to free us from our past so that we are able to live in the present. Many of us are honored by memories of our mistreatment of others. Those memories can creep up on us without warning. Our shame and remorse over our past actions are so deep that these three collections can cause us to feel unbearable guilt. We want to be free of such guilt. We begin I'm making a list of the people we've harmed.

Just thinking about our lives may frighten us. We may be afraid that we've done so much damage that we can never repair it, or we may be afraid of facing the people we've harmed. We find ourselves wondering how are amends will be received. Our most hopeful projections probably and tell be in absolved of any wrong doing. Our most nightmarish expectations may involve someone refusing to accept our amends, preferring instead to take revenge. Most of us have had fairly vivid imaginations, but this is not the time to get ahead of ourselves. We must avoid projections, either native or positive, about actually make in our amends. We are honored that Eight Step, not the Nine Step. At this point, making a list and become willing to make amends are our only concern.

Work in the previous steps has prepared us for the willingness we need to begin the Eight Step. We've honestly assessed the exact nature of our wrongs and honestly examine how our actions affected others. It was not easy to admit our wrongs. We had to believe in a Power that was supplied us with their age and love us through the pain involved in reviewing the results of our addiction. The same honesty and encourage we called upon as we rode our inventory and shared it are just as vital in making our man's list. We've been practicing these principles all along and are quite familiar with them. They Eighth Step is simply a constitution of our efforts to find freedom by applying spiritual principles.

Making a list of them becoming willing may be difficult unless we overcome our resentments. Most of us owe amends to at least one person who has also harmed us. Perhaps we haven't truly forgiven that person yet and find we are very reluctant to put her or his name on her list. However, we must. We are responsible for our actions. We make amends because we owe them. We must let go of resentments and focus on our part in the conflicts in our lives. We won't get better and be able to live the spiritual life we are seeking if we are still in the grip of a self -- obsession. We let go are my expectations, and we let go of blaming anyone for our actions. Our idea that we have been a victim must go. In the Eight Step, we are not concerned with what others have done to us. We are concerned only with accepting responsibility for what we've done to others.

If we still bear anger toward some of the people in our past, we will need to practice the simple spiritual principle of forgiveness. Our ability to forgive comes from our ability to accept and be compassionate with ourselves. However, if we have difficulty, we can ask our Higher Power for help. We pray for what ever it takes to become willing to forgive. We began to except ourselves as we are. Now we begin to accept others as they are.

And develop in a list of all the people, places, and institutions to whom we owe amends, we may wish to review our Fourth Step. If we've done a thorough Fourth Step, it should clearly outline our part in the conflicts in our lives and show how we harmed others by acting on her character defects. We find the people we wounded with our dishonesty, the people we stole from or cheated, the people who were on the receiving end of our wrongs. We also take note of how we harmed society as a whole and add that to our list. We may have drained community resources, exhibited offensive behavior in public, or refuse to contribute to the general welfare.

Although we may find the majority of our amends list from reviewing our Fourth Step it is not the only source of help we will be given in compiling our amends list. Our sponsor can help us also. When we share our inventory, our sponsor helps us focus on the exact nature of our wrongs. Our sponsors and side helps us see how we had wounded people by acting on our character defects; that same insight will now help us determine who actually belongs on our amends list.

Many of us had troubles in how we have harmed ourselves and may have been surprised when other addicts suggested that we add our own name to that list. Many of us had gone to extremes in matters of accepting responsibility for ourselves. Some of us have had a tendency to deny any responsibility, while others have taken a total blame for every disagreement. As we talk with our sponsor and other addicts, are flawed perceptions began to fall away and we find the clarity we need to work the Eight Step. With the help we have received, we start to develop a realistic view of where our responsibility truly began and ended.

Before we proceed in making a list, it is important that we understand what the word "harm" means and the context of the Eight Step. We may be inclined to think of harmed only in terms of physical suffering. However, there are many different forms of harm: causing mental anguish, property damage or loss, inflicting long -- lasting emotional scars, the train tress, and so forth. Though we may exclaim, "but I never meant to hurt anyone!", this is besides the point. We are responsible for the harm we cause no matter what our intentions were. In a time when people were hurt in any way because a something we did, they were harmed. To gain a better understanding of how we may have harmed people, we may want to "put ourselves in their shoes." If we can imagine what it felt like to be the victim of our reckless disregard for those around us, we shouldn't have any trouble at in those names to our list.

In addition to understanding what harm means; we also need to understand what "make amends" means. This step does not say that we become willing to say we're sorry, although that may be a part of our amends. Most of the people we've heard have probably heard us say "I'm sorry" enough to last a lifetime. In truth, we are becoming willing to do anything possible to repair the damage we've done, particularly by changing our behavior.

There may be instances in which we've inflicted harm so severe that the situation simply can't be set right. This may be readily apparent as we look at our relationships with those who have been in our lives for quite some time. Over the years, we have involved our families, partners, and long -- term friends and one painful situation after another. Even though we can't undo the past, our experience has shown that we still need to look at what we've done and acknowledge the damage we've cause. Despite the impossibility of changing what happened, we can start to make amends by not repeating the same behavior.

Accepting the harm we cause, being truly sorry, and becoming willing to go to any lengths to change is a painful process. But we need not fear our growing pains, for acknowledgment of these truths help us continue our spiritual awakening. Simply except the harm we've cause increases our humility. Being truly sorry is this clearest indication that are self -- centerdness has diminished. Willing to go to any lengths to change, we are newly inspired.

Some of our willingness will come about simply by writing our amends list. We will have the opportunity to face the harm we've done. Some of us, after writing the name of the person to whom we owe amends and what we did to harm that person, have added plans for how we intend to make amends. Planning how we are going to make amends may help increase our willingness as we see that we do have potential to repair the harm we've cause.

We want to become willing to make amends we owe, and we do whatever it takes to gain that willingness. If we find ourselves in gaging and debate with ourselves or getting tied up in assessing the exact level of willingness we need, we can lay these counter -- productive thoughts aside by making a conscious decision to pray for willingness. We may be still slightly hesitant, but we do the very best we can. Our recovery is at stake. If we want to continue with our recovery, we must make amends.

We ask God to help us find a willingness to make our amends. Praying for willingness takes our relationship with the God of our understanding to a step further. In the Seventh Step, we furthered our personal relationship with our Higher Power by asking for freedom from our shortcomings. Now we trust that Power to provide us with whatever we need to work the Eight Step. Our commitment to recovery includes becoming ready to go as far as we must.

A Higher Power is working in our lives, preparing us to be of service to others. The changes brought about by that Power are evident by our changing attitude and actions. We are developing the ability to choose spiritual principles over character defects and recovery over addiction. We have a fresh outlook on life, and we know that we are responsible for what we do. We no longer fill constant regret over the harm we cause in the past. Simply understanding how badly we've are people, being truly sorry for the pain we've cause, and become willing to let them know of our desire to make things right are the keys to freedom from our past. Though we have yet to make peace with ourselves, we've come a long way toward making peace with ourselves. With our new perspective, our trust in the God of our understanding, and our willingness, we go on the Step Nine

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