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Antidepressants in romantic relations and intimacy?



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Antidepressants in romantic relations and intimacy?

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Old 04-24-2016, 12:55 PM
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Question Antidepressants in romantic relations and intimacy?

I'm 2,5 years sober and a long time user of various anti depressants but SSRI's (sertraline) have been the mainstay for the last 5 years and I added wellbutrin 2-3 years ago (about the time I sobered up).

For me the sexual side effects (of SSRI's I suspect) are a total lack of pleasure and delayed or often absent climax. I got used to it (the drug kept the fear and anxiety in check) and I have been single for years and never conducted sexual activities with another person over that time period. That dysfunction was not a big problem over that period.

Unfortunately I recently lost a romantic relationship atleast partially because of my dysfunction/numbness. I love her alot but the relationship got colder and colder after we became intimate. My numbness must have been a disappointment or something.
I tried my best and talked to her about it but got nowhere.
Relationship seemed frozen for a month or two, and I ended it last week (with zero reaction on her part) and feel rather disillusioned.

This was a wake up call for me when private life is concerned. I will try to get rid of sertraline and raise wellbutrin with help of my psychiatrist.
Also started psychotherapy this week because I am sincerely worried about my health in terms of sex and romantic relationships.

've neglected this aspect of adulthood for most of my adult life in favor of everything else, in particular career and alcohol. (the latter I regret bitterly)
Any similar experiences? Advice?
I won't risk my sobriety no matter what.

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Old 04-24-2016, 07:30 PM
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Argh Work. Relationships ending is tough stuff.

I'm a lifer on antidepressants but celibate so it isn't a problem. I have heard other folks say it has been a problem in relationships.

Congrats on the years of sobriety. I hope you find your way through another layer of recovery from this.
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Old 04-25-2016, 03:17 PM
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Originally Posted by workoholic View Post
I won't risk my sobriety no matter what.

I admire your determination and your insistence in staying sober.

These other things are quality of life issues - important, to be sure, make no mistake.

But drinking, for me, is a death issue.

I hope that your doctor gets you where you need to be with your meds.

Thanks for sharing.
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Old 04-26-2016, 09:27 AM
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I found this today I hope it helps

https://www.thefix.com/content/ask-e...ntidepressants
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Old 04-29-2016, 06:52 PM
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Maybe talk to your dr. about other options where this isn't a side effect? There are a lot of newer drugs on the market that minimize this and other side effects from older anti-depressants? I don't respond well to SSRIs for my chronic depression so I was on Effexor for a long time. It became ineffective about 1.5 years ago and I switched to a newer med. One of my big issues is not to have a med that causes weight gain as my weight is a huge trigger for me. I remember my psychiatrist stating that a lot of the new meds are being made without the weight side effect/sexual side effects nowadays.
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Old 05-06-2016, 06:10 AM
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Thank you!
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Old 05-09-2016, 01:45 PM
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Babescake, I've been reading about Effexor being effective for social anxiety--on one website, adults with autism said it was the only thing that allowed them to make eye contact without anxiety. Did you think Effexor would be effective for this use? Sorry, workoholic, to hijack your thread, but I have no advice, although I've been on SSRI's for years now with the same effect--also led to my divorce, but so did the social anxiety. Life is a journey.
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Old 05-10-2016, 12:28 PM
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Sorry to hear that. Oh and don't worry about it
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Old 05-10-2016, 04:48 PM
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There's a lot of different SSRIs out there Work. Maybe there's one out there that does what it's meant to do without those side effects?

D
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Old 10-05-2016, 01:38 AM
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Psychology today published an article a while back titled ...

"Sex, Love, and SSRIs
Can Prozac keep you from falling—and staying—in love? How SSRIs wreak havoc on courtship"

... part of which reads ...

"Approximately 70 percent of people taking SSRIs suffer from sexual side effects. But these drugs may also compromise the ability to feel love.

Rutgers University anthropologist Helen Fisher, for one, believes SSRIs are wreaking havoc on human courtship. SSRIs alleviate depression by upping the levels of serotonin in the brain and curbing the production of the neurotransmitter dopamine. Unfortunately, dopamine is also responsible for the feelings of elation and ecstasy that accompany falling in love. By suppressing dopamine, Fisher argues, drugs like Prozac block your ability to have these feelings, thus making it harder to fall in love and stay in love.

This dopamine deficit affects people in a variety of ways, according to Fisher and her research partner, Virginia-based psychiatrist J. Andrew Thomson, Jr. Singles using antidepressants may have a harder time meeting people, because their natural sexual response is dampened. Some researchers believe desire was designed to help people select mates who are genetically suited to them. The spark that ignites on meeting someone new is telling you something: This might be your match. When you miss those signals, your odds of finding an appropriate mate decrease.

Even if you're one of the lucky ones who manage to find love while taking SSRIs, you still have some obstacles to overcome, says Fisher. Like Megan, you may lose the ability to orgasm, and this could cause long-term relationship issues. Orgasms trigger the release of the hormone oxytocin—one that has been linked with pair bonding. Indeed, those who fail to orgasm, thanks to SSRIs, may be at a distinct disadvantage when it comes to mating and bonding."
You can read the whole article here ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com/arti...love-and-ssris

There is also a very interesting paper about this stuff here ...

http://www.helenfisher.com/downloads/articles/18ecn.pdf

This article also talks about it ...

https://realitysandwiches.net/2013/0...relationships/
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Old 10-13-2016, 03:21 PM
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I'm sorry about your relationship issues. Don't blame it all on yourself, she doesn't sound very understanding. I had the same side effects and decided it wasn't worth it for me. I found other ways to deal with my anxiety, but I admit that it is difficult sometimes.
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Old 10-13-2016, 03:57 PM
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SSRIs along with the TADs can all cause impotency problems.
Don't know about Wellbutrin???
Moclobemide helped my depression with no adverse side effects
but i don't think it's available in U.S.
I found Serzone helpful, but it was banned in Australlia.
Good luck it's kinda like a raffle.
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Old 10-13-2016, 04:01 PM
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Originally Posted by timetohealguy View Post
Psychology today published an article a while back titled ...

"Sex, Love, and SSRIs
Can Prozac keep you from falling—and staying—in love? How SSRIs wreak havoc on courtship"

... part of which reads ...



You can read the whole article here ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com/arti...love-and-ssris

There is also a very interesting paper about this stuff here ...

http://www.helenfisher.com/downloads/articles/18ecn.pdf

This article also talks about it ...

https://realitysandwiches.net/2013/0...relationships/
for sources--------------
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Old 10-15-2016, 01:19 PM
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SSRI's never worked for me, and always caused me sexual side effects.
I think what you are planning to talk to your doctor about is a good idea.
I am on Wellbutrin and lamotrigine (mood stabilizer). The only thing I find has any effect on my sex drive is if I take my full dose of clonazepam (sleepy).
So that may be a route that works for you.
Most SSRI's caused me horrible side effects, I would get the full spectrum. On the flip side, those with a reputation for having bad withdrawals I'd get those too. Effexor was one of them.
Everyone's brain chemistry is different though. And make sure you are giving it enough time to try changes.
I am really sorry about your relationship ending glad you are not going to drink over it.
I know how frustrating the sexual side effects are. I've dealt with those enough.
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Old 10-16-2016, 01:35 AM
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Originally Posted by Delizadee View Post
SSRI's never worked for me, and always caused me sexual side effects. ...

I know how frustrating the sexual side effects are. I've dealt with those enough.
Tricyclic antidepressants can also cause sexual problems. I tried a tricyclic for a while, and while I didn't have any impotence problems on it, I found it ridiculously difficult to orgasm.

At first it seemed like a positive thing, as I could last a really long time before orgasming, which initially had "benefits" for my girlfriend at the time, and initially we both enjoyed that added endurance ... but after a while on that medication it just became frustrating until it reached the point that sometimes I couldn't orgasm with her from vaginal sex at all.

My girlfriend started feeling like because I couldn't orgasm during sex with her that I was not as attracted to her as I had been before. It definitely affected the intimacy between us.
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Old 10-16-2016, 06:18 PM
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I was given Buspar to counter low libido with SSRIs (in addition to). Also helped with the overeating.

But who knows, everyone's brain is different.
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