honeypig

It's my choice to make.

Casseopia

I love this. Wise words to live by.

honeypig

I thought the same, Cass. I put in so much time and effort trying to manage people and situations that I simply COULD NOT manage, but I resisted doing the work of recovery b/c "it's too hard."

But I think the quote is true; it's the same amount of work either way, just that the end result is totally different.

Steely

I'm choosing strong this time. Thanks honeypig.

PhoenixJ

And for me- more to the point, as I often get miserable, is to turn that around with strength and soldier on. Finding out who the hell I am without booze is that hard part. Good thread.

LexieCat

I think that's a very good point. It's never too late to turn things around and trade in the misery for strength.

honeypig

You know, at first I thought that it was like I could go down to my local Misery Exchange Center and say "hi, I have 8 bushel baskets of Misery. I'd like to trade them in for some Courage and Strength, please" and the nice person at the counter would exchange them right then and there.

But then I found out it didn't work that way. It was more like being a gardener.

I had to haul those 8 bushel baskets of Misery out to the back 40 and spread them all around the little sprouts of Courage, Strength, Patience, Peace, Love and Honesty that were just breaking through the ground. Since Misery and Manure have a lot in common, those little sprouts grew and grew!

And when I needed to go harvest from those plants, they bore way more fruit than the original 8 bushels of Misery that I started with...

PhoenixJ

There is a saying, attributed to Buddha that tells a similar analogy- of the beautiful lotus flower- that struggles out of 'muck' before it's beauty is apparent.

Steely

Hi Phoenix.

Yes, finding self is the hard part and I'm hoping that when we have our housing sorted we will be in a much better position to do that discovering. Space of our own.

honeypig

Bumping this up, seems like it could be of use again today.

Smarie78

Very useful today indeed! Although I wish there was an in between for my brain that doesn't want to be miserable NOR courageous It's amazing how we sometimes choose misery because it simply FEELS easier (feels because it actually isn't all that easy). So many times in life I choose misery simply because I feel I am not strong enough to put my own happiness and well being front and center. For me, "misery" translates into a lack of misery for others. How about that? Thanks for bumping this one. I will need to add this note to my mirror so I can read each morning

honeypig

Giving this one more bump today.

Sasha1972

In my life, I've amended this slightly to "you can be just plain miserable, or you can be miserable and learning something". If you can't avoid the misery, at least you can look for ways to gain some self-knowledge or some strength while it's going on.