My pain
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Boston Ma
Posts: 980
Originally Posted by DontRemember 
As a new to AA person.. I was at the point of ending my life, or not caring if it ended. I was done with dealing with drunk living,'forcing' my family to watch me drink my life away,no longer wanting to burden anyone with my issue. I sat with a bottle of vodka and my gun, up all night drinking. I thank god I passed out and went to my first meeting the following day. All of my guns have been turned over to a great friend of mine and I told him "If I get drunk in front of you in the next two years, they're yours". Of course I can just go buy another but, that was my time to "do or die" moment. I'm glad you got out of your chair and stopped him. Good luck to you and your family.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 2
I feel a bit lost the last 3 weeks seemed to be a blur of confusion, hindsight, anger. I find out my bf is an AH and to the point of physical dependency this literally crushed me, and he likely has depressions. His parents have said he decompensates when he sees me (unravels). I told his mom to take him to the hospital and we got in a fight. Basically he agreed to go to inpatient detox, and I was told I was not a part of the family and I was not going to be making any decision. I was in triage mode trying to rescue him which likely probably was not appropriate, but I was in shock that it had gotten to that stage. Now......I’m the outsider and I understand his family is rationing his alcohol. I was told he did get his liver checked etc. I look back and see red flags, he got a dui and that caused this last spiral. I was not in the picture as I understood his parents were looking after him and I wanted him to deal with his problems (little did I know he was likely slipping into a depression). He really is lovely, even when he drinks, he never has been mean or anything and it’s sad to see an amazing person there with alcohol having such a grip on him.
How am I now the demon in this? I lost myself for 2 weeks, but I am making sure I eat and workout, but I am mad I am blamed and I am mad his parents have literally threatened to report me if I try to help (they called my work and wrote a letter).
I think he will make it through this and hopefully things will be okay on the other side. My sister has told me to just see a counselor and move forward however, I am not sure what to do. His mom said if I contact I’m there will be consequences. I am thinking reporting me to my professional association. That I am not worried about, I am worried about this person is the one "caring" for him.
Am I just supposed to forget and sit here? Seriously I don’t know how this happened, my sister sad now that we have hindsight there were warnings.
How am I now the demon in this? I lost myself for 2 weeks, but I am making sure I eat and workout, but I am mad I am blamed and I am mad his parents have literally threatened to report me if I try to help (they called my work and wrote a letter).
I think he will make it through this and hopefully things will be okay on the other side. My sister has told me to just see a counselor and move forward however, I am not sure what to do. His mom said if I contact I’m there will be consequences. I am thinking reporting me to my professional association. That I am not worried about, I am worried about this person is the one "caring" for him.
Am I just supposed to forget and sit here? Seriously I don’t know how this happened, my sister sad now that we have hindsight there were warnings.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Hi, Barbie,
I'd suggest starting a new thread of your own to introduce yourself. I don't know how old you or your b/f are (AH around here stands for "alcoholic husband"), so I don't know if his parents have any "standing" to keep you away. That said, assuming he is an adult, he has the power to talk to whomever he wants.
I'd suggest backing off for the time being. Let him get stabilized. If he wants to reach out to you, he will.
Meantime, I'd suggest finding an Al-Anon group and getting started with them.
I'd suggest starting a new thread of your own to introduce yourself. I don't know how old you or your b/f are (AH around here stands for "alcoholic husband"), so I don't know if his parents have any "standing" to keep you away. That said, assuming he is an adult, he has the power to talk to whomever he wants.
I'd suggest backing off for the time being. Let him get stabilized. If he wants to reach out to you, he will.
Meantime, I'd suggest finding an Al-Anon group and getting started with them.
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