Group therapy.....Dizzyj?
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Join Date: Aug 2004
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Group therapy.....Dizzyj?
Dizzyj, Hey....I was just reading your post on another thread and was wondering if you might feel like elaborating about why you don't think you're ready?
Is it social anxiety issues?
I have issues with that too, but not so much that I can't usually push/force through them. My mom has a harder time then me and won't go to Alanon because of it, even though she struggles with her alcoholic H. She went with me once, but it made her too nerveous. And that's strange to me b/c she goes to a church where she's very comfortable (and I'm not). There's about 1000 or more peeps who attend there and she's very involved.
I know with me that once I push through things (like having to deal with new people at a new job) then once I get to know the people better than most of my anxieties disappear.
Just wondering if this is what it's like for you?
Is it social anxiety issues?
I have issues with that too, but not so much that I can't usually push/force through them. My mom has a harder time then me and won't go to Alanon because of it, even though she struggles with her alcoholic H. She went with me once, but it made her too nerveous. And that's strange to me b/c she goes to a church where she's very comfortable (and I'm not). There's about 1000 or more peeps who attend there and she's very involved.
I know with me that once I push through things (like having to deal with new people at a new job) then once I get to know the people better than most of my anxieties disappear.
Just wondering if this is what it's like for you?
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: grand jct, co
Posts: 197
Shutterbug, i have always been - no felt that way even in elementary - sometimes i was afraid to go to school - thats when the doctor said i had a mood disorder.
I hate walmart, and malls anywhere where there are lots of people - and sometimes i still can't go. And when i do, im there for a little while then i want to get the hell out of there. But sometimes when all the family gets together i feel the same way - but if i was drinking i didn't give a crap where i was or how people were there. Im going to the doctor on Monday and i'll try to remember to ask more about it, but dont forget i have csr bad. But maybe someone else out there has some ideas, you know something now that were discussing this and im thinking about it - there are certain people i can go places with and not feel that way - no i think its more of what kind of mood were in that day. i dont know. I think it something to figure out because the more sober i try to be the more things i want to do.
thats a good thing isn't it??
I hate walmart, and malls anywhere where there are lots of people - and sometimes i still can't go. And when i do, im there for a little while then i want to get the hell out of there. But sometimes when all the family gets together i feel the same way - but if i was drinking i didn't give a crap where i was or how people were there. Im going to the doctor on Monday and i'll try to remember to ask more about it, but dont forget i have csr bad. But maybe someone else out there has some ideas, you know something now that were discussing this and im thinking about it - there are certain people i can go places with and not feel that way - no i think its more of what kind of mood were in that day. i dont know. I think it something to figure out because the more sober i try to be the more things i want to do.
thats a good thing isn't it??
A picture's worth a 1000 words
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Join Date: Aug 2004
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That's definetly a good thing Dizz!
What's CSR???
I think my problems (now anyway) are mostly about proximity. I tense up whenever I have to be within a certain distance to someone else or if they pass within my space. Sounds crazy (kinda), but part of it is that I'm convinced that I smell bad and I dont' want anyone close enough to smell me. Truth is that, now especially, I'm a smoker who's depressed and so I don't shower regularly and sometimes go out shopping in the same clothes I wore the day before and slept in too, and my house smells like a kennel...so this is more of a realistic phobia, I suppose. But I think I might have developed this line of thinking (and even this way of stinky living????) as a way to NOT have to get close to people. Does that make sense?
I mean, even when I was working and if I'd just showered and got all snazzed up with expensiver perfume and lotions and stuff then I still dodge people and have fears that I'm stinky.
When I was little, my dad said I hurt a lot of friends and family members feelings because I wouldn't hug them or go near them. I don't know if it's along the same lines or if it's more from the PTSD/sexual abuse?
In college, my mind wasn't on smelling bad, but rather....i'm not sure. I lived in an older dorm that was on the outskirts of campus and we all had to walk across the street and through a corridor between the wrestling building and the football stadium in order to get onto campus and go to classes. It was a big dorm and I knew the names of about 75 peeps and about 20-30 buddies. When walking through that corridor I always dreaded it. Someone I know would always say "hi" to me in passing and I'd usually pretend I didn't hear them and kept walking. I wasn't trying to be rude at all.....for some reason I just didn't want anyone to acknowledge me and I didn't want to talk to them. After a month or so, I started feeling bad about it and decided to start going out of my way to say hi and to even say it first whenever I saw someone I knew and to do it with a smile. It helped me in a lot of ways to do that.
And with my job as a reporter/photog...well, I had a lot of anxieties all the time when havign to go to banquets or standing on the sidelines at sporting events or having to be down in front of 500 peeps to take graduation pics or squeeze past players and other media on a basketball court when a team wins or loses finals (to get reaction shots and trophy shots). You'd be surprized how many groups of people I had to push my way through over 3 years of working. Oh and the worst.....squeezing into a packed city council chamber and into the front row so as to hear and be able to get photos AND walking in late AND knowing that half of the people don't want the media there b/c of the hot town issue that's being hashed out in public. I don't like being the center of attention AT ALL if you can tell.
Oh.....lots of anxiety. I hate going shopping at Wal-mart unless late at night on a week night. Although, If I go with my sister it doesn't seem so bad b/c I can focus more on her and talking to her than the people in the store.
Suggestion: Find out what days, times and places support groups are being held in your area. Keep a copy with you in a purse or car or wallet and on one of those days when you're feeling good and secure push yourself to go to a meeting. Ask a friend or family member to come along. Each time you go back you will get more comfortable being around those same people....i would think anyway. And group therapy is just the best thing, in my opinion, you can do in working toward recovery and coping skills.
I just tell myself to fake it till I make it....I wouldn't be able to do 1/2 of what I do if I hadn't conditioned myself to be able to push past the anxiety/fear/uncomfortabless of it all. I think you can do it to.
You are stronger than you think! I truely believe you are much stronger than you give yourself credit for.
What's CSR???
I think my problems (now anyway) are mostly about proximity. I tense up whenever I have to be within a certain distance to someone else or if they pass within my space. Sounds crazy (kinda), but part of it is that I'm convinced that I smell bad and I dont' want anyone close enough to smell me. Truth is that, now especially, I'm a smoker who's depressed and so I don't shower regularly and sometimes go out shopping in the same clothes I wore the day before and slept in too, and my house smells like a kennel...so this is more of a realistic phobia, I suppose. But I think I might have developed this line of thinking (and even this way of stinky living????) as a way to NOT have to get close to people. Does that make sense?
I mean, even when I was working and if I'd just showered and got all snazzed up with expensiver perfume and lotions and stuff then I still dodge people and have fears that I'm stinky.
When I was little, my dad said I hurt a lot of friends and family members feelings because I wouldn't hug them or go near them. I don't know if it's along the same lines or if it's more from the PTSD/sexual abuse?
In college, my mind wasn't on smelling bad, but rather....i'm not sure. I lived in an older dorm that was on the outskirts of campus and we all had to walk across the street and through a corridor between the wrestling building and the football stadium in order to get onto campus and go to classes. It was a big dorm and I knew the names of about 75 peeps and about 20-30 buddies. When walking through that corridor I always dreaded it. Someone I know would always say "hi" to me in passing and I'd usually pretend I didn't hear them and kept walking. I wasn't trying to be rude at all.....for some reason I just didn't want anyone to acknowledge me and I didn't want to talk to them. After a month or so, I started feeling bad about it and decided to start going out of my way to say hi and to even say it first whenever I saw someone I knew and to do it with a smile. It helped me in a lot of ways to do that.
And with my job as a reporter/photog...well, I had a lot of anxieties all the time when havign to go to banquets or standing on the sidelines at sporting events or having to be down in front of 500 peeps to take graduation pics or squeeze past players and other media on a basketball court when a team wins or loses finals (to get reaction shots and trophy shots). You'd be surprized how many groups of people I had to push my way through over 3 years of working. Oh and the worst.....squeezing into a packed city council chamber and into the front row so as to hear and be able to get photos AND walking in late AND knowing that half of the people don't want the media there b/c of the hot town issue that's being hashed out in public. I don't like being the center of attention AT ALL if you can tell.
Oh.....lots of anxiety. I hate going shopping at Wal-mart unless late at night on a week night. Although, If I go with my sister it doesn't seem so bad b/c I can focus more on her and talking to her than the people in the store.
Suggestion: Find out what days, times and places support groups are being held in your area. Keep a copy with you in a purse or car or wallet and on one of those days when you're feeling good and secure push yourself to go to a meeting. Ask a friend or family member to come along. Each time you go back you will get more comfortable being around those same people....i would think anyway. And group therapy is just the best thing, in my opinion, you can do in working toward recovery and coping skills.
I just tell myself to fake it till I make it....I wouldn't be able to do 1/2 of what I do if I hadn't conditioned myself to be able to push past the anxiety/fear/uncomfortabless of it all. I think you can do it to.
You are stronger than you think! I truely believe you are much stronger than you give yourself credit for.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: grand jct, co
Posts: 197
Hi Jenna,
CSR means Cant Remember ****. Im glad that someone thinks im that strong - because i dont think i am - if i was i wouldn't need those pills. And you know what im still getting cravings - Do you think its all in my head, you know the need to drink - cause i know for sure my body doesnt need anymore. You know the Naltrexone is very bad for the liver - the doctor was worried about because after all the blood tests my Liver level was pretty high - so she has me going in Once Every Two Weeks - You know what i really really like her - She really listens to what saying and even before she makes a decision on what shes going to do for you, shes asks you how you feel about it. I like that.
I hope everything is going good for you, Im gonna fall asleep on the computer, Sweet Dreams - will talk more tommorow.
Josefina
CSR means Cant Remember ****. Im glad that someone thinks im that strong - because i dont think i am - if i was i wouldn't need those pills. And you know what im still getting cravings - Do you think its all in my head, you know the need to drink - cause i know for sure my body doesnt need anymore. You know the Naltrexone is very bad for the liver - the doctor was worried about because after all the blood tests my Liver level was pretty high - so she has me going in Once Every Two Weeks - You know what i really really like her - She really listens to what saying and even before she makes a decision on what shes going to do for you, shes asks you how you feel about it. I like that.
I hope everything is going good for you, Im gonna fall asleep on the computer, Sweet Dreams - will talk more tommorow.
Josefina
A picture's worth a 1000 words
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: With any luck, I'm lost in a view finder
Posts: 2,954
Is it all in your head....yes AND no (in my opinion). It's a habit, short and simple. Habits are usually things that our bodies don't need or don't need to do, but we still do them. Habit's are hard to break no matter who you are.
You will ALWAYS be an alcoholic even if you never take another drink for the rest of your life. Just a fact. That's why most of those who stay successful being sober are those who NEVER stop working a 12-step program. Just like....even if I lose 100 pounds...I will always struggle with food and I will ALWAYS have to work at keeping the weight off.
Just my thoughts.
But you ARE strong. You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for. And needing pills isn't a sign of weakness!!!! I need my inhalor several times a day...does that make me weak? NO!!! It just means that I need outside help and I am strong and smart for realizing that I can't do everything on my own!
Hang in there....
You will ALWAYS be an alcoholic even if you never take another drink for the rest of your life. Just a fact. That's why most of those who stay successful being sober are those who NEVER stop working a 12-step program. Just like....even if I lose 100 pounds...I will always struggle with food and I will ALWAYS have to work at keeping the weight off.
Just my thoughts.
But you ARE strong. You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for. And needing pills isn't a sign of weakness!!!! I need my inhalor several times a day...does that make me weak? NO!!! It just means that I need outside help and I am strong and smart for realizing that I can't do everything on my own!
Hang in there....
A picture's worth a 1000 words
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: With any luck, I'm lost in a view finder
Posts: 2,954
Sorry dizzy....I don't know how to let you know when I'm online except to say that it's usually late in the evenings.
...And NO questions are EVER dumb!!!! How else do we ever learn if we don't ask? So ask away....ask me anything and I'll try my best to answer them if I can.
Hugs,
...And NO questions are EVER dumb!!!! How else do we ever learn if we don't ask? So ask away....ask me anything and I'll try my best to answer them if I can.
Hugs,
Last edited by historyteach; 09-04-2008 at 02:21 AM. Reason: Addy deleted per user request
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: grand jct, co
Posts: 197
Well i dont know if he is kicking me in the butt - for being me, but he's gone to Mexico, he told me we were going to have a special weekend, dinner and dancing on saturday just us. Then came friday he was packing, i didnt say anything. He started loading the truck. I asked what ................. he just said i dont want to argue with you anymore... i He finished loading the truck took, a shower. asked if i would go with him as far as Phoenix, AR he would leave me at my sisters, and go from there. (My mom was in Phoenix) I didnt say yes or no. He left, havent heard from him since. I dont know what to think. or i
I got your email address, thank you Mine is [email protected]
I got your email address, thank you Mine is [email protected]
Last edited by dizzyj; 12-12-2005 at 11:09 PM. Reason: me
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