Just another question, if you don't mind...
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Just another question, if you don't mind...
The last time Trevor went to detox, the director told me that Trevor was using detox and rehab as part of his cycling. I think he meant Trevor would get clean just long enough to fatten up again, feel better, make an appearance of trying, (thereby still get help), and still have every intention of going back to his love -- heroin.
Can any of you attest to this? Does my interpretation sound right to you? Or did he mean something else entirely?
Thanks for any info you can lend to this idea. I've never heard of this before.
Shalom!
Can any of you attest to this? Does my interpretation sound right to you? Or did he mean something else entirely?
Thanks for any info you can lend to this idea. I've never heard of this before.
Shalom!
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Thanks, Todd.
He's out of the detox; he left. Then went to a hospital in Mass. Now, he wants me to pick him up. I said "no."
But, I appreciate what you've told me. I've never heard of that.
But, what happens then? How can he get clean if he can no longer go back to the detox? They refused to allow him back in last time, until I called the top doctor in RI, and informed him that Trevor was finally diagnosed bipolar and on medication. That was "extenuating circumstances" for the detox, and they let him in once more. Of course, Trevor left...so, I think it's a dead road now. So, how can he get into a rehab. They won't take him without going through the detox, here in RI.
Is he just totally screwed now?
Shalom!
He's out of the detox; he left. Then went to a hospital in Mass. Now, he wants me to pick him up. I said "no."
But, I appreciate what you've told me. I've never heard of that.
But, what happens then? How can he get clean if he can no longer go back to the detox? They refused to allow him back in last time, until I called the top doctor in RI, and informed him that Trevor was finally diagnosed bipolar and on medication. That was "extenuating circumstances" for the detox, and they let him in once more. Of course, Trevor left...so, I think it's a dead road now. So, how can he get into a rehab. They won't take him without going through the detox, here in RI.
Is he just totally screwed now?
Shalom!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Hey there teach,
Us alkies do that too. Drink 'till we can't anymore then go to a "spin dry" hospital or recovery home and "dry up" enough to start drinking again. It's so easy to manipulate people into believing our sad story it almost becomes a game. When I was drinking I used the sad story of my childhood to con gullible people into all sorts of things. Some of the older wino's taught me how they would place chalk marks on the back walls of hospitals and homes that were easy prey.
>> ... But, what happens then? How can he get clean if he can no longer go back to the detox?
Getting clean is never a problem. Anybody can get clean for a day or two. The challenge is in _staying_ clean. ( or sober, or away from gambling, or whatever the addiction may be )
>> ... Is he just totally screwed now?
Nope. He never will be screwed as long as NA exists. Out here in the west there's even AA meetings that allow non-alkie addicts to participate. He is only screwed if he continues to play the game of avoiding his responsibility for his own addiction. If he so chooses he is perfectly capable of "dosing down" over several days to get over the worst of the physical discomfort and then showing up at a meeting of NA in order to _stay_ clean. That's the way most people do it, and it works for tens of thousands of addicts all over this country every day.
If he's clean he won't have any trouble getting meds for the bipolar. Around here there's lots of folks who are both bipolar and addicted. My sponsor is one and he's got 32 yrs clean and sober.
I don't know what it's like out in your side of the world, but over here the Nar-Anon people get together and do "field trips". There's a number of large "speaker meetings" that actively welcome Nar-Anon and Al-Anon, which gives you the opportunity to hear long time sober members tell their story. It's very helpful in getting an understanding of how the mind works when in the disease, as well as giving huge amounts of hope. You might be interested in something like that.
Mike :-)
Us alkies do that too. Drink 'till we can't anymore then go to a "spin dry" hospital or recovery home and "dry up" enough to start drinking again. It's so easy to manipulate people into believing our sad story it almost becomes a game. When I was drinking I used the sad story of my childhood to con gullible people into all sorts of things. Some of the older wino's taught me how they would place chalk marks on the back walls of hospitals and homes that were easy prey.
>> ... But, what happens then? How can he get clean if he can no longer go back to the detox?
Getting clean is never a problem. Anybody can get clean for a day or two. The challenge is in _staying_ clean. ( or sober, or away from gambling, or whatever the addiction may be )
>> ... Is he just totally screwed now?
Nope. He never will be screwed as long as NA exists. Out here in the west there's even AA meetings that allow non-alkie addicts to participate. He is only screwed if he continues to play the game of avoiding his responsibility for his own addiction. If he so chooses he is perfectly capable of "dosing down" over several days to get over the worst of the physical discomfort and then showing up at a meeting of NA in order to _stay_ clean. That's the way most people do it, and it works for tens of thousands of addicts all over this country every day.
If he's clean he won't have any trouble getting meds for the bipolar. Around here there's lots of folks who are both bipolar and addicted. My sponsor is one and he's got 32 yrs clean and sober.
I don't know what it's like out in your side of the world, but over here the Nar-Anon people get together and do "field trips". There's a number of large "speaker meetings" that actively welcome Nar-Anon and Al-Anon, which gives you the opportunity to hear long time sober members tell their story. It's very helpful in getting an understanding of how the mind works when in the disease, as well as giving huge amounts of hope. You might be interested in something like that.
Mike :-)
doing the inside job
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: planet happy
Posts: 542
It's part of his recovery or..... not.
The seeds had been planted.
He knows...if he wants help, there's help.
will...i was one those that was label that wasn't going to make it.
I never followed the rules or suggestions and I surely the hell wasn't
gonna go through the motions of doing what everybody else wanted
me to do , think, belive ,feel, act. Yes, I'm an addict, but that's
just the symtoms of my deep rooted problems.
I got sick and tired of being sick and tire...of the drugs there at the end.
But ya know.....I was also sick and tired of being sick and tired of peaple
telling me how to live, feel, think,belive, act. It was never with my best interest in thier mind, that I assure you.
Yes i had to hit bottom...I had to loose everything and beyound.
But it was my blessing. An ah haa moment I suppose.
I RELIZED I HAD TO DO IT FOR MYSELF.
Recovery is contrary to many misinformed belive.
The paradox.....
It's about freedom...from my addiction of course.
But goes beyound that.
Recovery had to be different than before...changes????
The first time I heard someone said (in my life)
" you don't have to do a G-d damn thing"
I hung around.lol
It puts the responsibilties squarely in my face.
No more blame....will, becuase nobody is telling me how to live.lol
I'm FREE !!!!!,
I HAVE A CHIOCE TODAY
There's no rules, right way, wrong way
It is , what it is....the GRACE of GOD or a miracle.
The seeds had been planted.
He knows...if he wants help, there's help.
will...i was one those that was label that wasn't going to make it.
I never followed the rules or suggestions and I surely the hell wasn't
gonna go through the motions of doing what everybody else wanted
me to do , think, belive ,feel, act. Yes, I'm an addict, but that's
just the symtoms of my deep rooted problems.
I got sick and tired of being sick and tire...of the drugs there at the end.
But ya know.....I was also sick and tired of being sick and tired of peaple
telling me how to live, feel, think,belive, act. It was never with my best interest in thier mind, that I assure you.
Yes i had to hit bottom...I had to loose everything and beyound.
But it was my blessing. An ah haa moment I suppose.
I RELIZED I HAD TO DO IT FOR MYSELF.
Recovery is contrary to many misinformed belive.
The paradox.....
It's about freedom...from my addiction of course.
But goes beyound that.
Recovery had to be different than before...changes????
The first time I heard someone said (in my life)
" you don't have to do a G-d damn thing"
I hung around.lol
It puts the responsibilties squarely in my face.
No more blame....will, becuase nobody is telling me how to live.lol
I'm FREE !!!!!,
I HAVE A CHIOCE TODAY
There's no rules, right way, wrong way
It is , what it is....the GRACE of GOD or a miracle.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: fumbling towards ecstasy
Posts: 2,551
Teach - I am sure it's done, although I can't personally fathom why. IMO, detox and rehab are NOT happy places. I would never have gone had I not been driven by the absolute darkest desperation.
However, I will add to Mike's post that when one sincerely, deeply, truly, on-their-knees desires to get clean and sober, it can be done with or without detox / rehab. I was an addict of the hopeless kind who got recovery by going cold turkey off of an insane amount of opiates. I couldn't get out of bed for a month - no exaggeration. As soon as I could physically get dressed, I dragged myself to meetings and just held on to the chair 'cause that was all I could do. For me, recovery was hitting surrender and it didn't happen in a professional facility for drug addicts and alcoholics.
There are lots and lots and lots of addicts like me who got clean and sober and have been able to stay that way by toughing out the withdrawals and then grabbing on to the 12 steps and working a program of recovery like our lives depend on it - because it does.
Hugs,
phinny
However, I will add to Mike's post that when one sincerely, deeply, truly, on-their-knees desires to get clean and sober, it can be done with or without detox / rehab. I was an addict of the hopeless kind who got recovery by going cold turkey off of an insane amount of opiates. I couldn't get out of bed for a month - no exaggeration. As soon as I could physically get dressed, I dragged myself to meetings and just held on to the chair 'cause that was all I could do. For me, recovery was hitting surrender and it didn't happen in a professional facility for drug addicts and alcoholics.
There are lots and lots and lots of addicts like me who got clean and sober and have been able to stay that way by toughing out the withdrawals and then grabbing on to the 12 steps and working a program of recovery like our lives depend on it - because it does.
Hugs,
phinny
I'm an addict.
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Hyde Park, NY
Posts: 1,201
Teach,
I also didn't get clean this time in facillity. I tried that in the past, but this time I just detoxed myself cold turkey and delt with it. I started going to NA as soon as I could get out of the house. It has worked for me so far. The only thing I learned in a fcillity was that addiction was a disease that I have and that NA existed, when I wanted to get clean I knew where to go.
As for the cycleing thing, it sounds like my girlfriend. in the last 3 years she has been to 17 different treatment facillities, allways getting kicked out or leaving on her own. She didn't go the last couple times she tried to get clean b/c honestly, no one would take her back, her options were limited. She has struggled, but now she knows that rehab isn't a cure and if she wants to stay clean she is gonna have to do it herself, she sees the importance on NA and I pray she makes it.
When all the cards are down, an addict that wants to use will use and an addict that wants to stay clean will stay clean, with or with out rehab.
I'll be keeping both you and your son in my prayers.
Everything works out the way it is supposed to, have faith in that.
Blake
I also didn't get clean this time in facillity. I tried that in the past, but this time I just detoxed myself cold turkey and delt with it. I started going to NA as soon as I could get out of the house. It has worked for me so far. The only thing I learned in a fcillity was that addiction was a disease that I have and that NA existed, when I wanted to get clean I knew where to go.
As for the cycleing thing, it sounds like my girlfriend. in the last 3 years she has been to 17 different treatment facillities, allways getting kicked out or leaving on her own. She didn't go the last couple times she tried to get clean b/c honestly, no one would take her back, her options were limited. She has struggled, but now she knows that rehab isn't a cure and if she wants to stay clean she is gonna have to do it herself, she sees the importance on NA and I pray she makes it.
When all the cards are down, an addict that wants to use will use and an addict that wants to stay clean will stay clean, with or with out rehab.
I'll be keeping both you and your son in my prayers.
Everything works out the way it is supposed to, have faith in that.
Blake
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
WOW!
Thanks for all the responses...
Phinney,
Your words and experiences touched me very much. He continues to say that people "can't" detox on their own; or if they do, they don't have much of a habbit.
Mike;
I'm hearing you about his responsibility for his actions. This last time he left the detox, he said he "didn't think about it" at all. I asked him if he told someone that he was leaving, (with another addict he knew, and who had a car). He admitted that he had done so. I simply said, then you DID think about it!
Nutz;
I'm hearing you too about freedom of choice. Trevor is making choices; choices that could kill him.
Blake,
Thanks for sharing your story and that of your g/f's. She sounds like he does. Playing with fire against the odds. Thank you also for your prayers...
Trevor's kidneys have failed twice now. His body can't take too much more, I suppose. A friend told me the other day that, the fact his kidneys have stopped working twice means he's already dying....only a matter of time now. I don't know if that's true or not. Anyone know?
Again, I appreciate all your thoughts and sharing of your experiences. I'm hearing it.
Shalom!
Thanks for all the responses...
Phinney,
Your words and experiences touched me very much. He continues to say that people "can't" detox on their own; or if they do, they don't have much of a habbit.
Mike;
I'm hearing you about his responsibility for his actions. This last time he left the detox, he said he "didn't think about it" at all. I asked him if he told someone that he was leaving, (with another addict he knew, and who had a car). He admitted that he had done so. I simply said, then you DID think about it!
Nutz;
I'm hearing you too about freedom of choice. Trevor is making choices; choices that could kill him.
Blake,
Thanks for sharing your story and that of your g/f's. She sounds like he does. Playing with fire against the odds. Thank you also for your prayers...
Trevor's kidneys have failed twice now. His body can't take too much more, I suppose. A friend told me the other day that, the fact his kidneys have stopped working twice means he's already dying....only a matter of time now. I don't know if that's true or not. Anyone know?
Again, I appreciate all your thoughts and sharing of your experiences. I'm hearing it.
Shalom!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: out there...
Posts: 2,653
I've heard it time and time again ..
"I got some clean clothes, a shower, a few warm meals and as soon as I had fittycents over lunch money I was headed back out."
Some of the most grateful recovering addicts I know used up every offer of help they found, and when it got to where they had no hope from outside anymore, they turned inside and found their higher power.
"I got some clean clothes, a shower, a few warm meals and as soon as I had fittycents over lunch money I was headed back out."
Some of the most grateful recovering addicts I know used up every offer of help they found, and when it got to where they had no hope from outside anymore, they turned inside and found their higher power.
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Some of the most grateful recovering addicts I know used up every offer of help they found, and when it got to where they had no hope from outside anymore, they turned inside and found their higher power.
Shalom!
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