Addict without the drugs
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 101
Addict without the drugs
Can someone explain this to me? I have heard it in meetings many times, and I've asked my sponsor what it meant but I can't grasp the concept.
I think back to the way I behaved while using, and I certainly needed a drug to help me out in that regard! Then again, I was still a mess the first year or so while in recovery.
Anywho, anyone willing to explain?
I think back to the way I behaved while using, and I certainly needed a drug to help me out in that regard! Then again, I was still a mess the first year or so while in recovery.
Anywho, anyone willing to explain?
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,915
It is probably similar to what is sometimes called dry drunk syndrome. The person isn't using, but they haven't done the work to treat the underlying issues in their lives. Their behavior isn't that much different than when they were using.
TheMostSordidSpotOnEarth
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: ParadiseOnEarth
Posts: 811
What do you get when you take away the alcohol from an alcoholic horse thief? You get a sober horse thief.
Another one is, what happens when you take the "alcohol" away from an "alcoholic"? You're left with the "ick."
If drugs were the problem, the solution would be very simple: just stop using. The problem is that for the real addict, this is an impossible task. Addiction is not a purely physical condition. Rather, there is cunning, baffling and powerful mental component that cannot be underestimated. Why? Because an untreated (or insufficiently treated) addict mind will always send the addict back to using.
Moreover, addiction is progressive using or clean. This is how addicts with many years sober relapse. This also means that as one uses, or even if one engages in periods of abstinence, the disease will consistently get worse.
Standing at the turning point, there are but two options: ongoing recovery or jails, institutions and death.
The only way that has ever worked for me has been through a spiritual (not religious) series of precise actions shown to me by another addict that had already taken them and gotten well. My experience is that when we recover spiritually, we are relieved of the mental component automatically; without this mental component, we don't relapse. This also means that we don't die at the hand of drugs. But dying from drugs is only one risk of addiction; there are many, many others.
I have seen more addicts than I can count that, insufficiently treating the condition, begin to substitute with more drugs and prescription drugs, behaviors, you name it, finding themselves in spiritual purgatory, never really getting well, thinking they must be different, or getting just as lost and at bottom with a new addiction altogether, when it is actually the quality of recovery that is lacking. Or they get cranky, bossy, mean to be around. They wind up alone. They wind up unhappy. Moreover, the suicide rates for addicts, even clean, are astounding. No, just not using drugs does not treat drug addiction. In fact, just not using can feel worse! Just not using can be a very painful place for an untreated addict - painful enough to go back to using.
We hear that drugs were but a symptom. The real problems lie within ourselves. Yet, when I fell into recovery, I couldn't see them, and the ones that I could see I had no idea how to fix. I had been trying to fix everything for so long to go my way, and the result was rock bottom. The spiritual component has been the key for me. No more restlessness, irritability, discontentment plaguing my life. No more mountains of resentments. No more trying to control the rest of the world or the people about me and becoming indignant or self-pitying when things don't go my way. No more guilt, shame and feelings of uselessness. No more depression and insomnia. No more living in fear. What freedom on the other side!
Since you're working with a sponsor, I'll tell you that recovery truly started for me through the steps. The meetings are good, but for me they were no where near enough. As my network says, we recover through the steps we take, not the meetings we make.
While I do attend a lot of meetings, work with others and do service, I cannot say enough good about where I am today because of the work through living the steps. Tonight I went for my night run down the coast, through a forest and up to a lighthouse on a hill under the stars overlooking the sea, and still at 2 years and 10 months I just cried and cried with gratitude. I love the journey and would not give it up for anything in the world. This is more magnificent and amazing than I could possibly express.
With all of my contempt prior to investigation, I had no idea how sick I was, and no idea what I was missing. Today this is is an amazing adventure.
I wish you the very best as you continue to grow on your own journey. I'm sending you lots and lots of encouragement and so much love.
Another one is, what happens when you take the "alcohol" away from an "alcoholic"? You're left with the "ick."
If drugs were the problem, the solution would be very simple: just stop using. The problem is that for the real addict, this is an impossible task. Addiction is not a purely physical condition. Rather, there is cunning, baffling and powerful mental component that cannot be underestimated. Why? Because an untreated (or insufficiently treated) addict mind will always send the addict back to using.
Moreover, addiction is progressive using or clean. This is how addicts with many years sober relapse. This also means that as one uses, or even if one engages in periods of abstinence, the disease will consistently get worse.
Standing at the turning point, there are but two options: ongoing recovery or jails, institutions and death.
The only way that has ever worked for me has been through a spiritual (not religious) series of precise actions shown to me by another addict that had already taken them and gotten well. My experience is that when we recover spiritually, we are relieved of the mental component automatically; without this mental component, we don't relapse. This also means that we don't die at the hand of drugs. But dying from drugs is only one risk of addiction; there are many, many others.
I have seen more addicts than I can count that, insufficiently treating the condition, begin to substitute with more drugs and prescription drugs, behaviors, you name it, finding themselves in spiritual purgatory, never really getting well, thinking they must be different, or getting just as lost and at bottom with a new addiction altogether, when it is actually the quality of recovery that is lacking. Or they get cranky, bossy, mean to be around. They wind up alone. They wind up unhappy. Moreover, the suicide rates for addicts, even clean, are astounding. No, just not using drugs does not treat drug addiction. In fact, just not using can feel worse! Just not using can be a very painful place for an untreated addict - painful enough to go back to using.
We hear that drugs were but a symptom. The real problems lie within ourselves. Yet, when I fell into recovery, I couldn't see them, and the ones that I could see I had no idea how to fix. I had been trying to fix everything for so long to go my way, and the result was rock bottom. The spiritual component has been the key for me. No more restlessness, irritability, discontentment plaguing my life. No more mountains of resentments. No more trying to control the rest of the world or the people about me and becoming indignant or self-pitying when things don't go my way. No more guilt, shame and feelings of uselessness. No more depression and insomnia. No more living in fear. What freedom on the other side!
Since you're working with a sponsor, I'll tell you that recovery truly started for me through the steps. The meetings are good, but for me they were no where near enough. As my network says, we recover through the steps we take, not the meetings we make.
While I do attend a lot of meetings, work with others and do service, I cannot say enough good about where I am today because of the work through living the steps. Tonight I went for my night run down the coast, through a forest and up to a lighthouse on a hill under the stars overlooking the sea, and still at 2 years and 10 months I just cried and cried with gratitude. I love the journey and would not give it up for anything in the world. This is more magnificent and amazing than I could possibly express.
With all of my contempt prior to investigation, I had no idea how sick I was, and no idea what I was missing. Today this is is an amazing adventure.
I wish you the very best as you continue to grow on your own journey. I'm sending you lots and lots of encouragement and so much love.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
Hi Ms. TimmyV, and welcome to this part of the forum.
My own sense of that never-never land in the first few months of recovery is that your sense of what is "normal" has been distorted for so long that you now feel lost. We tend to return to old habits, old "normals", even when they are bad, because it is what we have come to know and be "comfortable" with.
Sometimes "the path of least resistance" (i.e., return to old habits) has to be actively avoided, which is why everyone tells you to rip up old dealer number, delete them from your phone, quit going to old haunts, make new relationships with clean people, etc.
I don't think I was ever a "dry drunk" myself. I dislike labels, including "addict" and "alcoholic", but I believe the 12 step programs provide a good structure for people, especially in early recovery where your footing is not yet solid. However, use what works for you, because that is really what is the most important thing to do.
I hope you are feeling better and more secure now.
FT
My own sense of that never-never land in the first few months of recovery is that your sense of what is "normal" has been distorted for so long that you now feel lost. We tend to return to old habits, old "normals", even when they are bad, because it is what we have come to know and be "comfortable" with.
Sometimes "the path of least resistance" (i.e., return to old habits) has to be actively avoided, which is why everyone tells you to rip up old dealer number, delete them from your phone, quit going to old haunts, make new relationships with clean people, etc.
I don't think I was ever a "dry drunk" myself. I dislike labels, including "addict" and "alcoholic", but I believe the 12 step programs provide a good structure for people, especially in early recovery where your footing is not yet solid. However, use what works for you, because that is really what is the most important thing to do.
I hope you are feeling better and more secure now.
FT
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 120
A few areas of reference to help explain this might be:
AA 12/12 PP. 106-108 explains the "new way of life" acquired from working the first 11 steps. P. 82-84 of the AA Big Book talks about the promises we experience coming out of the gate from working Step 9.
p.8 and p. 25 of the AA Big Book mentions profound personality change that "revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, our fellows and toward God's universe. "
You'll find sobriety is putting the "plug in the jug." But in recovery (from step work), you'll be given so much more. Share/ask this with your sponsor for more insight as well.
AA 12/12 PP. 106-108 explains the "new way of life" acquired from working the first 11 steps. P. 82-84 of the AA Big Book talks about the promises we experience coming out of the gate from working Step 9.
p.8 and p. 25 of the AA Big Book mentions profound personality change that "revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, our fellows and toward God's universe. "
You'll find sobriety is putting the "plug in the jug." But in recovery (from step work), you'll be given so much more. Share/ask this with your sponsor for more insight as well.
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