Living Life on Life's Terms
Resilient One
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 46
Living Life on Life's Terms
Does anyone practice this in their own recovery?
This coping skill, or more of a new learned behavior, has been one of the biggest helps to me since my clean date. It's sort of forced this worrying, hyper, a+++ personality to take it easy. Combined with the "be in the moment" philosophy, I found I've become more easygoing than I have ever, in my life, been before. I was never taught these skills. I was taught that life was too hard to live happily and that it was merely to be tolerated, begrudgingly.
Even while doing the hated chores like dishes or a deep clean of the house, I force myself not do it as fast and efficiently, while still committing to doing them thoroughly and completely. When I make the bed, I take the time to fold the sheet over "just so", just to be in the moment. It's really amazed me just how much this has calmed my nerves and slowed me down.
For someone who has lied on the couch either withdrawing or zoned out for the past 5 years, getting up to put a dish in the sink was an accomplishment for me. All the while, I worried about everything still. Now I've got the yard almost completely de-shrubbed/de-vined and things are looking quite nice in here - finally. I've always been jealous of the type "b" personalities because their philosophy was so much less stressful but never had the key to converting myself into one, until now.
I'd like to hear strategies from others in this same vein so that I can adopt more of this into my life.
This coping skill, or more of a new learned behavior, has been one of the biggest helps to me since my clean date. It's sort of forced this worrying, hyper, a+++ personality to take it easy. Combined with the "be in the moment" philosophy, I found I've become more easygoing than I have ever, in my life, been before. I was never taught these skills. I was taught that life was too hard to live happily and that it was merely to be tolerated, begrudgingly.
Even while doing the hated chores like dishes or a deep clean of the house, I force myself not do it as fast and efficiently, while still committing to doing them thoroughly and completely. When I make the bed, I take the time to fold the sheet over "just so", just to be in the moment. It's really amazed me just how much this has calmed my nerves and slowed me down.
For someone who has lied on the couch either withdrawing or zoned out for the past 5 years, getting up to put a dish in the sink was an accomplishment for me. All the while, I worried about everything still. Now I've got the yard almost completely de-shrubbed/de-vined and things are looking quite nice in here - finally. I've always been jealous of the type "b" personalities because their philosophy was so much less stressful but never had the key to converting myself into one, until now.
I'd like to hear strategies from others in this same vein so that I can adopt more of this into my life.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
one of the first things I did was begin to take pride in my appearance and how neat I was keeping my apartment.
I planted flowers on my balconey for the first time
Copeing skills? Not really....simple improvements that gave me pleasure.....
:
I planted flowers on my balconey for the first time
Copeing skills? Not really....simple improvements that gave me pleasure.....
:
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 142
My personal interpretation is that it means to develop a zen attitude. You cannot control 95% of what happens in your life. So why worry about it? Worrying only makes things worse.
You need to pick your battles carefully. If you try and fight everything you'll lose the war.
You need to pick your battles carefully. If you try and fight everything you'll lose the war.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 267
I learned it to mean that instead of feeling like you're always the victim, that in recovery we need to learn to take action to take control of our lives. Start by making your bed in the morning, keep things clean. Then tackle more complex things after you get the hang of that. There doesn't need to be any higher purpose other than de-victimizing your mindset.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Living in Today!
Posts: 3,945
Originally Posted by MyGirlMimi 
Does anyone practice this in their own recovery?
This coping skill, or more of a new learned behavior, has been one of the biggest helps to me since my clean date. It's sort of forced this worrying, hyper, a+++ personality to take it easy. Combined with the "be in the moment" philosophy, I found I've become more easygoing than I have ever, in my life, been before. I was never taught these skills. I was taught that life was too hard to live happily and that it was merely to be tolerated, begrudgingly.
Even while doing the hated chores like dishes or a deep clean of the house, I force myself not do it as fast and efficiently, while still committing to doing them thoroughly and completely. When I make the bed, I take the time to fold the sheet over "just so", just to be in the moment. It's really amazed me just how much this has calmed my nerves and slowed me down.
For someone who has lied on the couch either withdrawing or zoned out for the past 5 years, getting up to put a dish in the sink was an accomplishment for me. All the while, I worried about everything still. Now I've got the yard almost completely de-shrubbed/de-vined and things are looking quite nice in here - finally. I've always been jealous of the type "b" personalities because their philosophy was so much less stressful but never had the key to converting myself into one, until now.
I'd like to hear strategies from others in this same vein so that I can adopt more of this into my life.
This coping skill, or more of a new learned behavior, has been one of the biggest helps to me since my clean date. It's sort of forced this worrying, hyper, a+++ personality to take it easy. Combined with the "be in the moment" philosophy, I found I've become more easygoing than I have ever, in my life, been before. I was never taught these skills. I was taught that life was too hard to live happily and that it was merely to be tolerated, begrudgingly.
Even while doing the hated chores like dishes or a deep clean of the house, I force myself not do it as fast and efficiently, while still committing to doing them thoroughly and completely. When I make the bed, I take the time to fold the sheet over "just so", just to be in the moment. It's really amazed me just how much this has calmed my nerves and slowed me down.
For someone who has lied on the couch either withdrawing or zoned out for the past 5 years, getting up to put a dish in the sink was an accomplishment for me. All the while, I worried about everything still. Now I've got the yard almost completely de-shrubbed/de-vined and things are looking quite nice in here - finally. I've always been jealous of the type "b" personalities because their philosophy was so much less stressful but never had the key to converting myself into one, until now.
I'd like to hear strategies from others in this same vein so that I can adopt more of this into my life.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 142
Originally Posted by BeenDown2Times
I learned it to mean that instead of feeling like you're always the victim, that in recovery we need to learn to take action to take control of our lives. Start by making your bed in the morning, keep things clean. Then tackle more complex things after you get the hang of that. There doesn't need to be any higher purpose other than de-victimizing your mindset.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
