clevelandjeg

I have been married to my wife for nearly ten years. She has been drinking off an on for about 9 of those years and frankly her drinking didn't bother me. Now I know that it bothered her, I am in full support of her attendance of multiple meeting per week and talking with her sponsor every night, and all the other time taking commitments she has.
Now that being said, I wish the little time she does spend with us, we have 3 daughters, was frankly better. She seems annoyed by us and doesn't seem to really want to be around us anymore and only want to hang out with her AA friends. I'm not sure when becoming a sober alcoholic meant she no longer had to be a mom or a wife. I can get through this friend the husband aspect of things, but I feel like basically a single parent that has to keep explaining to my kids why mommy is not home a lot of evenings. And when she is home she's either writing in her journal, talking to her sponsor, or going out to help her other AA buddies. Any advice for feeling a little more appreciated for a the single parenting I'm doing right now? This is not a poor me post, it's a help me stay married to a recovering alcoholic post.

Mark75

She needs to hear this directly from you, just as you have here.

I don't know how long she has been in recovery, if she's early on... well, yea, it takes a lot of time at first. That said, she needs a heads up from you.

I had one from my wife...

lilotto

Clevelandjeg, it can be a challenge to relate when an alcoholic finds that there is a life without alcohol. Up until then their life revolved around alcohol. All of a sudden they find others that suffered as they did and it's like a child learning to ride a bike for the first time without training wheels. Its a new found freedom for the alcoholic. I agree you need to try and share your feelings with her without complaining. I would also suggest that maybe you should attend a few Al-Anon meetings it may help you understand your wife's actions and how to cope with them. It is my understanding that they are very helpful. Who knows maybe you will find some new friends of your own that will help you work this part of the journey. GB

BrokenHeartWife

Yes, go to Al Anon.

As for feeling like you're the only adult and parent in the home; that's what many/most/all spouses of alcoholics feel like. When a father sitting next to me in Al Anon said that he felt like the only parent in the home and that his AW was like an extra child, the other Al anon spouses completely agreed, many of them cried as the emotions of being a "single parent in a married home" came through. You probably have been a single parent...long before your wife began going to AA.

CarolD

I agree that Al anon helped me immensley when dealing
with loved ones who drank...

Here is another forum to find support and info for yourself..

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Prayers for healing going out to the 5 of you
Welcome to our recovery community..