I'm drowning- falling apart
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: land of sunshine and pill mills
Posts: 272
I'm drowning- falling apart
Can't stop crying. Realizing we are going back home next week and how will I cope. No energy. Can't go back Cant move ahead
Everything is a mess
Everything is a mess
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
Hi NVR,
Are you alone today? If you are, that may not be the best thing for you. When you are feeling like this, the best thing to do is get outside your normal routine, get some sun on your skin, breathe some fresh air (hot as it may be), treat yourself to something you don't usually get to eat or get to do (except you know what).
The emotional highs and lows of withdrawal last well into the second month, at least they did for me. Getting used to doing stuff without my "out" was tough. Your energy is low, you still don't feel normal, and you probably don't even know what normal is any more.
It is a lost, forlorn feeling.
Check back, eh?
Ft
Are you alone today? If you are, that may not be the best thing for you. When you are feeling like this, the best thing to do is get outside your normal routine, get some sun on your skin, breathe some fresh air (hot as it may be), treat yourself to something you don't usually get to eat or get to do (except you know what).
The emotional highs and lows of withdrawal last well into the second month, at least they did for me. Getting used to doing stuff without my "out" was tough. Your energy is low, you still don't feel normal, and you probably don't even know what normal is any more.
It is a lost, forlorn feeling.
Check back, eh?
Ft
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: land of sunshine and pill mills
Posts: 272
Can't breathe. Crying.
Reality looming ahead very soon
Not alone but can barely function and my lack of energy is wearing thin on my family.
The highs and lows of this.... Can't do it again but can't say I'd be clean if I was at home. How awful is that.
I just want to scream WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
But I already know. All the crap I've covered up with using is still here to be cleaned up. Just as scary as before - maybe more because almost 2 years have gone by.
Oh my god I am so lost today.
So lost
Reality looming ahead very soon
Not alone but can barely function and my lack of energy is wearing thin on my family.
The highs and lows of this.... Can't do it again but can't say I'd be clean if I was at home. How awful is that.
I just want to scream WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
But I already know. All the crap I've covered up with using is still here to be cleaned up. Just as scary as before - maybe more because almost 2 years have gone by.
Oh my god I am so lost today.
So lost
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
Hey NVR,
Facing what's ahead is often really scary. When you feel like that, there is a tendency to try to figure out your whole future at once, what are you going to do.
All you REALLY have to do is figure out what you are going to do today. Only today. If you try to tackle the next whole year, or even the next whole month, sometimes that's too much at one time.
Make a plan for tomorrow. Only tomorrow. Plan little pieces of your next few days. You don't have to figure your life out right this minute. You will have plenty of time, and taken in bits, it is so much easier.
Take care, dear. Sometimes life just sucks bigtime. When it does, just remember -- THIS TOO SHALL PASS. EVERYTHING CHANGES. NOTHING STAYS THE SAME. Bad stuff, Good stuff, everything. The way you feel right now will pass.
Facing what's ahead is often really scary. When you feel like that, there is a tendency to try to figure out your whole future at once, what are you going to do.
All you REALLY have to do is figure out what you are going to do today. Only today. If you try to tackle the next whole year, or even the next whole month, sometimes that's too much at one time.
Make a plan for tomorrow. Only tomorrow. Plan little pieces of your next few days. You don't have to figure your life out right this minute. You will have plenty of time, and taken in bits, it is so much easier.
Take care, dear. Sometimes life just sucks bigtime. When it does, just remember -- THIS TOO SHALL PASS. EVERYTHING CHANGES. NOTHING STAYS THE SAME. Bad stuff, Good stuff, everything. The way you feel right now will pass.
Insane Asylum Director
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Hiding insanity in-sanity
Posts: 77
You are crying because you are human. Remember that, the opiates made me a zombie. I never felt much emotion to anything and if I did, it had to be bad. I didn't abuse them, mind you. I just became dependent for pain relief.
My condition worsened over time and there is no explanation for that. Pressure related migraines and sickness are idiopathic. I think you can muster up the strength to get over being around your natural surroundings and still remain determined.
You made it this far, be proud of that. It is bad to be alone in your thoughts, I know this. Also, do you have any animals at home you can confide in? That seemed to help me. I talked to my stupid cat a lot. He was always there for me though. I could shove him away, and he would come back to me.
Remember that in all of your suffering, you are rebuilding yourself anew. I know it is so hard, I'm still going through it. I spend many nights alone, trying to fall asleep because my head hurts so bad.
Don't give up your fight, you've won every round so far.
Hey it looks as though there will be football after all this year. YAY! Well, it's a guy thing but still, you can watch games to distract yourself if you have a favorite team!
You'll be fine at home, don't let the sickness deal a knockout to you.
My condition worsened over time and there is no explanation for that. Pressure related migraines and sickness are idiopathic. I think you can muster up the strength to get over being around your natural surroundings and still remain determined.
You made it this far, be proud of that. It is bad to be alone in your thoughts, I know this. Also, do you have any animals at home you can confide in? That seemed to help me. I talked to my stupid cat a lot. He was always there for me though. I could shove him away, and he would come back to me.
Remember that in all of your suffering, you are rebuilding yourself anew. I know it is so hard, I'm still going through it. I spend many nights alone, trying to fall asleep because my head hurts so bad.
Don't give up your fight, you've won every round so far.
Hey it looks as though there will be football after all this year. YAY! Well, it's a guy thing but still, you can watch games to distract yourself if you have a favorite team!
You'll be fine at home, don't let the sickness deal a knockout to you.
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: land of sunshine and pill mills
Posts: 272
Did someone say football??!! I forgot about football!! I love to watch sports!! I love college ball and pro. I do have something to look forward to! YAY!!!
Then theres hockey and basket ball!!
Something to look forward to that isn't my life.
Thank you MB :-)
And yes, I need to take one day at a time but my family is pressuring me about my career or graduate school. Too much pressure. Their money is sometimes too high a price but they do so much for my kids.
Something to think about tomorrow- as Scarlett O'Hara would say
Then theres hockey and basket ball!!
Something to look forward to that isn't my life.
Thank you MB :-)
And yes, I need to take one day at a time but my family is pressuring me about my career or graduate school. Too much pressure. Their money is sometimes too high a price but they do so much for my kids.
Something to think about tomorrow- as Scarlett O'Hara would say
Insane Asylum Director
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Hiding insanity in-sanity
Posts: 77
WOO-HOO! Football is almost here! I can't wait.
My team is the Kansas City Chiefs, what's yours? You gotta love Jamaal Charles, that little $hit can run can't he? Whatever your team is, you can be sure that it's right around the corner. Let's track the NFL together, it'll be awesome!
Sorry, I am SO looking forward to FOOTBALL!!!!!!!
My team is the Kansas City Chiefs, what's yours? You gotta love Jamaal Charles, that little $hit can run can't he? Whatever your team is, you can be sure that it's right around the corner. Let's track the NFL together, it'll be awesome!
Sorry, I am SO looking forward to FOOTBALL!!!!!!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: land of sunshine and pill mills
Posts: 272
Good lord at my mood swings. Thank Carl my meds are kicking in.
I'm a mess. But a mess that's starting to feel better. We decided to make old fashioned ice cream from scratch with fresh peaches from the farm. Kissing my kids helping too. They need a clean Mom and for that I will soldier on. I MUST.
I'm a mess. But a mess that's starting to feel better. We decided to make old fashioned ice cream from scratch with fresh peaches from the farm. Kissing my kids helping too. They need a clean Mom and for that I will soldier on. I MUST.
Insane Asylum Director
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Hiding insanity in-sanity
Posts: 77
Aww, you're making ice cream? I'm lactose intolerant but love the stuff. I still eat it, then my wife makes me sleep on the couch.
I'm sure everything will be fine for you, not to detract from your subject. It's just hard, coping with pain and we all have it in one form or another.
Hey, send me some of that homemade stuff! I'll take lactaid before I eat it. hee-hee
I'm sure everything will be fine for you, not to detract from your subject. It's just hard, coping with pain and we all have it in one form or another.
Hey, send me some of that homemade stuff! I'll take lactaid before I eat it. hee-hee
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