Taper and W/D from Hydro Question
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 49
Taper and W/D from Hydro Question
Okay, just a little background. Had some injuries, started in on the Hyrdos for them. Ended up getting an easy, cheap street supply. Went from 4 or 5 tens a day to as many as 13 or 14. Didn’t like the anxiety they were causing. I have some chronic pain from early onset arthritis and a pinched nerve but I took them because I liked the energy and focus. I’m not kidding myself on that front. Anyway, I am basically sick of paying the money and just being on pills. They have not impacted my life or job but I can see how they would and I’m sick of blowing money on them.
I’d say that I have been steady at 8 10’s for several months but have not gone a day without in close to a year. Some days I was taking closer to 15 especially in the past few months. So, that’s the background. And I decided I just needed to stop. There are a lot of great opportunities for my on the horizon and I don’t want to screw them up because I’m in some opiate haze… and they also just aren’t fun anymore.
So Friday I took a total of 11.5 10s, Saturday it was 13 10s, Sunday it was 9.75 10s, Monday it was 5 10s and today I have taken 2 (spaced out over 6.5 hours) and feel fine. I am prescribed buspar for anxiety as well as generic xanax .5s. I am also taking some Alegra D for some allergy issues. Last night I had no problem sleeping through the night after one hit of weed and my usual nighttime buspar. I am not a regular pot smoker but I have no problem with it and I have heard it helps at night with W/D.
My question is, as I am tapering down is it the opinion of the folks here that I still have a rough road ahead when I go down to a day without Hydro which should be Friday of this week? I am a reasonably fit man in my late 30’s. I recently completed a 42-mile canoe race. Eat little meat, etc. You know, I take care of myself in other areas. As I said, I just want to be free of the expense and kind of back to normal. I don’t think that anyone in my family or friend group has noticed that I have been changed much over the past year other than I drink much, much less. Why drink when you can catch a hangover free buzz?
I know I wont just sail through it but so much of the W/D pain when I have been forced to really trim down or go without in the past was primarily in the form of anxiety and muscle soreness and lethargy. I think I can handle all that but I am just wondering how bad folks think it will be. I think my usage pattern is probably dead in the middle of the pack and went on for nearly a year. I have a family history (one member) of alcoholism but other than that the genetic slate seems pretty clean. Of course, I would love to just pop my taper supply and catch a buzz but I have been able to get work done, visit my family, go to work etc today when I had only taken 1 10 in an 18 hour period.
I tried once before to get off of them and it was pretty easy but that was about in September of last year when I had only been abusing them for about 4 months, give or take. I got back on them for the same reasons everyone does, I guess… because they are easy and blunt the full force of the world and, for a time, make you feel like a better and more productive you. The time has come for me to end it, so any advice on soldiering through would be appreciated. Is it possible that I just got lucky and I might skate past the really nasty W/D portion of this with some anxiety and soreness? And don’t get me wrong. I don’t feel awesome, I am pretty low energy but I can hack what it is throwing at me so far.
Yesterday I went down to 4 and made it through fine. None yet today and I feel okay. So, is it possible it might not be that bad?
I’d say that I have been steady at 8 10’s for several months but have not gone a day without in close to a year. Some days I was taking closer to 15 especially in the past few months. So, that’s the background. And I decided I just needed to stop. There are a lot of great opportunities for my on the horizon and I don’t want to screw them up because I’m in some opiate haze… and they also just aren’t fun anymore.
So Friday I took a total of 11.5 10s, Saturday it was 13 10s, Sunday it was 9.75 10s, Monday it was 5 10s and today I have taken 2 (spaced out over 6.5 hours) and feel fine. I am prescribed buspar for anxiety as well as generic xanax .5s. I am also taking some Alegra D for some allergy issues. Last night I had no problem sleeping through the night after one hit of weed and my usual nighttime buspar. I am not a regular pot smoker but I have no problem with it and I have heard it helps at night with W/D.
My question is, as I am tapering down is it the opinion of the folks here that I still have a rough road ahead when I go down to a day without Hydro which should be Friday of this week? I am a reasonably fit man in my late 30’s. I recently completed a 42-mile canoe race. Eat little meat, etc. You know, I take care of myself in other areas. As I said, I just want to be free of the expense and kind of back to normal. I don’t think that anyone in my family or friend group has noticed that I have been changed much over the past year other than I drink much, much less. Why drink when you can catch a hangover free buzz?
I know I wont just sail through it but so much of the W/D pain when I have been forced to really trim down or go without in the past was primarily in the form of anxiety and muscle soreness and lethargy. I think I can handle all that but I am just wondering how bad folks think it will be. I think my usage pattern is probably dead in the middle of the pack and went on for nearly a year. I have a family history (one member) of alcoholism but other than that the genetic slate seems pretty clean. Of course, I would love to just pop my taper supply and catch a buzz but I have been able to get work done, visit my family, go to work etc today when I had only taken 1 10 in an 18 hour period.
I tried once before to get off of them and it was pretty easy but that was about in September of last year when I had only been abusing them for about 4 months, give or take. I got back on them for the same reasons everyone does, I guess… because they are easy and blunt the full force of the world and, for a time, make you feel like a better and more productive you. The time has come for me to end it, so any advice on soldiering through would be appreciated. Is it possible that I just got lucky and I might skate past the really nasty W/D portion of this with some anxiety and soreness? And don’t get me wrong. I don’t feel awesome, I am pretty low energy but I can hack what it is throwing at me so far.
Yesterday I went down to 4 and made it through fine. None yet today and I feel okay. So, is it possible it might not be that bad?
MIND OF DESTRUCTIVE TASTE
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 744
My 3 plus year addiction to very strong painkillers has always led me to terrible w/d's. Tapering was never an option, my addict mind quickly extinguised any strength I thought I had, so it failed miserably for me.
I truly hope that you manage to escape the brunt of these horrible opiate w/d's but in my opinion it doesn't seem likely....most of us don't escape it. Of course, the severity of w/d's will vary from person to person...
I've heard a lot of failed tapering stories where people still end up facing nasty w/d's...just to be completely honest here. But none of us can predict what's really gonna happen, ya know? We can only share our experiences...
I'm happy that you are here and happy that you have made the decision to stop using. Giving yourself the gift of recovery, is the best thing you can do for YOU right now
You've found a great place - full of support here, so keep coming back - post as much as you need to and we will be here to listen and help you along the way!
-Jess
I truly hope that you manage to escape the brunt of these horrible opiate w/d's but in my opinion it doesn't seem likely....most of us don't escape it. Of course, the severity of w/d's will vary from person to person...
I've heard a lot of failed tapering stories where people still end up facing nasty w/d's...just to be completely honest here. But none of us can predict what's really gonna happen, ya know? We can only share our experiences...
I'm happy that you are here and happy that you have made the decision to stop using. Giving yourself the gift of recovery, is the best thing you can do for YOU right now
You've found a great place - full of support here, so keep coming back - post as much as you need to and we will be here to listen and help you along the way!-Jess
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
Hi louisdq:
One thing is for sure, the longer you are on opiates, the harder it seems to get off of them. So it is good you are doing it now before it gets worse.
It will get worse if you don't stop. I am only 4+ months clean from oxycodone, which is "worse" than hydros, but they are both opiates just the same. And the withdrawal seems to be similar, if what I read here is correct. And I believe it is. My withdrawal history is right here on this forum, in the "Oxycodone withdrawal help" and "I'm going cold turkey..." threads. So I won't repeat the whole thing here. But I post a lot, and so do some others, so you won't have a hard time finding "good" withdrawal stories.
When I was researching HOW to get the hell off oxys last year, I spoke (anonymously of course) to an addiction medicine specialist in my area, who listened to my history and told me I had little hope of getting off oxys by myself, because I had all the "danger signs" of someone who would be hard to stop.
One of the main "danger signs" he warned me about is one I hear on this forum all the time. Evidently, "normal" people get drowsy and slightly seasick with opiates and want to get off them as soon as possible after stuff like surgery, dental work, etc. The other group, if you want to cluster us that way, is those of us who LIKE the feeling of opiates and who GET ENERGY AND FOCUS while using them. That is almost a "paradoxical" reaction if you think about it. I don't get sleepy from oxys, I get ENERGIZED. Or, I used to anyway, before getting adapted to higher doses and then so toxic I knew I had to stop or eventually would kill myself using them.
Since you get energy and focus from opiates, you are in the danger-sign-group. Get off now while you can. It does get harder. I tried over and over to quit last year, and I failed miserably. Trying to taper off only made me crave higher doses.
My guess is that you will hit withdrawals within 24 to 48 hours after your last dose. I hope the taper you are doing works for you, because for those who succeed at doing that, it seems to help. For me, I couldn't have any sort of "supply" at home, or I would just rob myself of my stash, and worry about the consequences when I ran myself dry.
Since access is so easy for you, I would figure out a way to cut yourself off. With access, it will be too easy to cave when you start feeling sick. And you probably will. Just imagine how toxic this stuff is that you are taking when it makes you so sick when you stop. It is really toxic stuff. Most people here will tell you that. I wish I were one of those people who is not an addictive personality, because now I'm scared of dental procedures and the like, because I personally never want to risk addiction again.
Post here, and post frequently. Especially if you need the support, a lot of it will come your way on these forums.
Good luck, and hang in there!
FT
One thing is for sure, the longer you are on opiates, the harder it seems to get off of them. So it is good you are doing it now before it gets worse.
It will get worse if you don't stop. I am only 4+ months clean from oxycodone, which is "worse" than hydros, but they are both opiates just the same. And the withdrawal seems to be similar, if what I read here is correct. And I believe it is. My withdrawal history is right here on this forum, in the "Oxycodone withdrawal help" and "I'm going cold turkey..." threads. So I won't repeat the whole thing here. But I post a lot, and so do some others, so you won't have a hard time finding "good" withdrawal stories.
When I was researching HOW to get the hell off oxys last year, I spoke (anonymously of course) to an addiction medicine specialist in my area, who listened to my history and told me I had little hope of getting off oxys by myself, because I had all the "danger signs" of someone who would be hard to stop.
One of the main "danger signs" he warned me about is one I hear on this forum all the time. Evidently, "normal" people get drowsy and slightly seasick with opiates and want to get off them as soon as possible after stuff like surgery, dental work, etc. The other group, if you want to cluster us that way, is those of us who LIKE the feeling of opiates and who GET ENERGY AND FOCUS while using them. That is almost a "paradoxical" reaction if you think about it. I don't get sleepy from oxys, I get ENERGIZED. Or, I used to anyway, before getting adapted to higher doses and then so toxic I knew I had to stop or eventually would kill myself using them.
Since you get energy and focus from opiates, you are in the danger-sign-group. Get off now while you can. It does get harder. I tried over and over to quit last year, and I failed miserably. Trying to taper off only made me crave higher doses.
My guess is that you will hit withdrawals within 24 to 48 hours after your last dose. I hope the taper you are doing works for you, because for those who succeed at doing that, it seems to help. For me, I couldn't have any sort of "supply" at home, or I would just rob myself of my stash, and worry about the consequences when I ran myself dry.
Since access is so easy for you, I would figure out a way to cut yourself off. With access, it will be too easy to cave when you start feeling sick. And you probably will. Just imagine how toxic this stuff is that you are taking when it makes you so sick when you stop. It is really toxic stuff. Most people here will tell you that. I wish I were one of those people who is not an addictive personality, because now I'm scared of dental procedures and the like, because I personally never want to risk addiction again.
Post here, and post frequently. Especially if you need the support, a lot of it will come your way on these forums.
Good luck, and hang in there!
FT
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 49
Thanks for all the support and kind words all! I am continuing with my taper and so far so good. Of course, I'd love to down the 15 or so 10s I still have but I am all to aware of where that would land me. Somehow I found myself in a good frame of mind and going from 15+ 10s a day to 3 or 4 a day over a weeks time was not awesome but I feel fine right now. I rode my bike to work, did my stuff. You know... trying to stay busy. I have taken 1 10 today so that is one in a 19 hour period and I wasn't climbing the walls or anything but I was craving one. Right now, and I may be totally kidding myself, most of it seems psychological to me. It just seems like if I can get down to taking one in that span of time then the day in less than a week on this taper then things should not be too bad. I am sure it wont be awesome but I really feel like I am out ahead of this thing. But, I am trying to not be too hopeful or arrogant about it. I know I would like nothing more than to pop 3 and catch a buzz and watch the day float by, but that is not on options if I want to take advantage of all the things life has to offer me.
I don't know if I could have done a taper like this a month ago. It's weird, like some switch went off and I just wanted to do it. But, again, maybe I'm kidding myself and I'll be throwing up under a blanket a week from now. For the time being, I am just going to stick to my plan. Go on a vigorous bike ride and try to stay focused on other things. Thanks again for reading and for offering your suggestions. I know it is different for everyone. We will just have to see how it works itself out. Best of luck to all those out there who are going through much worse things than I am. I know that dark hole is not a fun place to be.
I don't know if I could have done a taper like this a month ago. It's weird, like some switch went off and I just wanted to do it. But, again, maybe I'm kidding myself and I'll be throwing up under a blanket a week from now. For the time being, I am just going to stick to my plan. Go on a vigorous bike ride and try to stay focused on other things. Thanks again for reading and for offering your suggestions. I know it is different for everyone. We will just have to see how it works itself out. Best of luck to all those out there who are going through much worse things than I am. I know that dark hole is not a fun place to be.
MIND OF DESTRUCTIVE TASTE
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 744
Wonderful that it's going well and you are staying strong!! I hope it continues for you and you find recovery. The longest lasting/hardest part of kicking is the psychological effects. It can really eff with your head.
I agree with FT, it's great you're getting out of this before it spirals even further out of control.
Very important that you are also keeping busy, that is key
-Jess
I hope it continues for you and you find recovery. The longest lasting/hardest part of kicking is the psychological effects. It can really eff with your head. I agree with FT, it's great you're getting out of this before it spirals even further out of control.
Very important that you are also keeping busy, that is key
-Jess
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