doitforjohnny

Hello,
I was wondering if anyone ever got anxiety and depression 2 weeks after quitting. Last time I quit which was 2 months ago I went through the typical withdrawals and then after 4 days I felt great. But then 9 days after I started to feel some major anxiety and depression which lasted about a week. Then after that I felt great!

Well I felt so great I drank 2 weeks later. Go figure!

Well I now stopped again on July 1st. And once again 9 days later I get this anxiety and depression! What is this. Is this PAWS? Has anyone ever gotten this before? Any advice?

Do you think this is just some more post withdrawals?

Johnny

GreenTea

That pattern sounds familiar. Yes, I'd attribute it to PAWS.

For me, the first two weeks was pretty rough as my body adjusted to life without alcohol. That left me pretty raw, both in mind and body. During the first month I tried to stay focused on the physical side of the disease and recovering from it -- good nutrition, plenty of sleep, lots of water, etc. -- trying to give my brain a chance to operate "as designed" once again.

The second month I focused on the mental side of things. I didn't really have any choice, given the emotional roller-coaster I was already on. My "cycle" back then was about a week each way. The first week I'd almost feel "normal" emotionally, followed by some nasty depression and obsessive thinking. Then I would "cycle back" and repeat.

This went on for a few months, but I stuck with it. I knew some of it was my brain chemistry recovering, and some of it was unresolved issues demanding to be faced. Meetings were vitally important for me then and it was only God's Grace that got me through it. I used to "joke" about it all, saying that I had remembered why I used to drink so much.

Steadily though, the "cycle" started to decrease both in amplitude and frequency -- the "bad" emotions started to become less intense and there would be more time between bouts of depression.

By the time I hit my ninety day mark, two things had happened. First, I had started to develop better ways of dealing with my emotions and working through the issues of my past. Second, I had started to find "little pebbles" in my life -- little areas of joy that didn't involve drinking. I started to build on these, trying to foster them and help them grow.

Things stayed this way for the next ninety days, and slowly but steadily I started getting better. The depressive bouts were down to only about once a month or so, they lasted only a matter of hours, I knew how to deal with them effectively, and when they weren't happening I was actually enjoying life again, thinking about the future and glad to be alive. Talk about the miracle happening!

Shortly after my six month mark, things came back with a vengeance. My disease had been "doing push-ups". It was stronger because *I* was stronger. There was a period there, (a little less than a week), when the obsession and depression came back, and it came back strong. If I would have relapsed it would have been then.

I knew what to do. I surrounded myself with sober people. I talked about what I was going through. I asked for help. I focused on service work. And more than anything, I reminded myself that it wasn't a permanent situation and that it too would pass. My job was to live through it and not drink and God carried my through the rest.

And it did pass. And I didn't drink. And that was about six months ago. Every month gets a little better.

The disease is sneaky and convoluted. Its because our minds can be sneaky and convoluted and the disease will use whatever means it can find to keep you hooked. I know what you mean by "I felt so good I went out and drank again". Part of recovery for me has always involved finding OTHER things to do beside drink when I feel happy, or sad, or I'm simply conscious.

Your pattern sounds familiar, and yes I'd say its part of the PAWS.

Stay the course and don't give in to the obsession. Find other things to do -- things which you will NOT regret -- things which you will be GLAD you did instead.

Recovery is possible, and every month things get a little better. You are not alone!

GlassPrisoner

PAWS takes a little longer actually. But what you are experiencing is normal. It's what drives a lot of people back to the drink.

For me, working a program of recovery (AA), virtually eliminated anxiety and depression form my life.

CarolD

Welcome to SR!

Yes..it seems so.

For me...by 6 months of AA recovery
no more PAWS.

Good to see you here
keep in touch

nakur

I have the same. First few days I felt great because I managed to quit then after a week I started having anxiety and panic attacks, usually just before going to quit. I am on day 17 now and it's a bit of a rollercoaster, some days are good, some bad. You just have to hang in there.

Like GreenTea said this is a cycle. I was off alcohol for 5 months last year and relapsed because of a sudden period of depression and anxiety. But I didn't correlate this period to my drinking history and actually thought drinking again would help me. Now I know it's PAWS trying to lure me into booze.

catch-22

I would say this is quite normal. You go through periods of feeling depressed (well, I stopped drinking - what now?) and euphoric. And you are right: I too relapsed because I was feeling great, not the other way round! It's been nearly two months for me, and I relapsed twice (I've had three glasses of wine and three glasses of champagne in all), but I didn't restart drinking. I just feel so great physically that I will never go back there. It's so nice being able to have a proper night sleep.

Catch

GrouchoTheCat

Short answer... Yes!

Cravings are normal and to be expected. For me and for most, depression too.

What is key is having a plan in place to deal with the cravings, for me, they were just too strong to resist without support.

I find support in AA.

doitforjohnny

Thanks Everybody,
It's nice to know that I'm not going crazy!
I know this will pass but it feels horrible!
The anxiety is the worst thing. I have this pressure/heaviness in my chest. And I feel like I'm on speed!
And I cry all the time. And you know how you get butterflies in your stomach? I have them all through my body!

I really appreciate all of your help! It's nice to communicate with people who know what I'm going through. I will go to a meeting when this anxiety lifts. But I can't leave the house when I'm like this, the anxiety gets worse when I get around people.

Is there anything I can do to speed up recovery from this? I am now eating a hypoglycemic diet and that seems to make me feel a little better. Any meds? Vitamins?

Thanks,
Johnny

stone

Eating well and exercise help a lot, if you have a good diet you shouldnt really need extra vitamins but taking B complex or multivitamins might help. You already know it passes so I would avoid meds if possible, however if carries on I would see a doctor.

I quit 15 days ago too

GreenTea

Yep, that's sounds familiar. You are definitely not alone!

You might want to check out the "Excerpts: Under The Influence" sticky above.

I don't know how long you've been using, but please remember that alcohol affects each and every cell in your body. The longer you've used, and the more you've used, the more affected your cells have been. I used to drink to "saturation" levels each time I used, and my tolerance has been pushed 'way up. The point is that your cells have to recover from all that.

They have to recover in a few ways... They not only need to make the transition back to functioning without alcohol -- a transition which is a bit traumatic for them -- but they also need to repair the damage that has been done to them. And they need to do all that while still keeping you alive.

ALL of your cells have to do that, including the cells in your heart and BRAIN.

If a couple of skin cells flip out for a little bit while they're doing that, its probably not that big a deal -- maybe your elbow might itch for a few minutes before they once again start performing their vital functions.

But when your brain cells do it, the effects can be widespread. Perhaps your blood pressure isn't always properly regulated for a bit, or you find yourself in a cold sweat, or maybe your heart skips a beat every once in a while. Scary, huh?

The good news is that this situation isn't permanent. Eventually the transition will be complete and enough repairs will have been made so that you start to feel normal again. I remember that first month as feeling like one long, last, horrible hangover, (and then all the emotions kicked in).

Remember too that alcohol messes with the reward system in your brain. You've come to rely on alcohol to trigger and operate the system, and the part of your brain which usually performs that function may have atrophied. You need to exercise it again in order to get it healthy once more. I think this may contribute to how strong the obsession can be.

For me, it really helped to keep the different aspects properly categorized -- physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual. That way I could deal with the them appropriately -- use a physical means for a physical aspect, such as proper nutrition, for example -- most all of my pain was emotional, as another example -- a lot of my obsession was psychological -- you get the idea. And through it all, pray, pray, pray.

Talking to others who have been there -- AA meetings, the fellowship, my sponsor, SR -- helped me tremendously. I also slept quite a lot during those first two months, (and yeah, there were many bouts of insomnia too, as well as some pretty scary dreams). I slept a LOT.

Stay the course. Talk to others. Go outside, feel the sunlight, watch the trees and just breathe.

You are not alone.

doitforjohnny

Thanks so much Green Tea. Very helpful and encouraging words. I just love your posts!

Well to update my situation I have been starting to feel good again. I actually feel human! I get some heaviness in my chest here and there, mostly when I go outside and at night-but no depression and anxiousness!
I have been eating good clean portioned food every three hours. I also have been meditating. I know that it's passing now and I know that there will be some more bumpy roads ahead but I just really want to be sober. I want to feel good all the time, like I used too. And this time around I am going to meetings and diving into the steps!
I'm so grateful that you guys and gals are here to help me! My wife doesn't understand what I'm going through. She actually has been taking it personal. I have been reading "Under the Influence" and that is a great book!

Thanks again,
Johnny

CarolD

Wow!
That is really good news
Congratulations on your progress.

doitforjohnny

Thank you Carol! : )

GreenTea

She might want to consider finding an Al-Anon group. If she balks saying that SHE isn't the one with the problem, try telling her that they're there to help her cope with all the problems that YOU have caused.

doitforjohnny

I did some research on Al-Anon and it sounds great! I'm going to bring that up to her tonight. Thanks Green Tea!

Johnny

doitforjohnny

Hello,
So since I seem to be going through PAWS, do you think an antidepressant would help me through this? Is anyone on any Antidepre

doitforjohnny

Hello,
Since I seem to be going through PAWS, do you think an antidepressant would help me through this? Is anyone on any Antidepressants?

barb dwyer

whoa. echo.

Doit-

I doubt you'll get anyone here to give you medical advice like that.
That's something to talk about with your doctor.

GreenTea

Echoing Barb here, that's something you'll need to discuss with your doctor. In fact, it would be a good idea to let him know what's going on with you, (openly and honestly, of course), if you haven't already. He may want to monitor you or he might have other suggestions. This IS a health issue afterall.

Me personally, I did it the "natural" way -- lots of water, lots of food, lots of sleep, lots of meetings. At the time I was too messed up to try to face a doctor. You're fortunate in that you have your wife available.

doitforjohnny

Hello,
I just thought I would pop by and say hello again. I am still sober after all this time and I can't begin to tell you how awesome I feel now! I feel good each and everyday. Back then I thought I would never get to this point. I remember feeling pretty horrible around July 15th 2007. My last drink was on July 1st and I came on here looking for help and some advice. Carol, Stone, Nakur, Catch-22, GrouchoTheCat, GlassPrisoner and especially GreenTea. Your posts helped me and gave me hope when I literally thought I had none. I awoke from that dark place around July 28th. I remember it well. It felt as if I was born again. And it happened so gracefully. One day I was whole again. It was like someone turned the light on.
I had no job but I started a business that also helped me. My whole life changed for the better. When I used to drink I would feel anxious around people. I know have my own business that puts me in front of people all day long and I feel calm and relaxed. Boy have I changed!

I remember that I felt even better at the six month mark. Then again at the 1 year mark. I am now at almost 4 years sober and I feel like a new man. A feeling that some take for granted. Not me. Everyday and night I thank GOD for the blessings he has given me. Two of them are " Thank you GOD for allowing me to be sober" "Thank you GOD for allowing me to feel good everyday".
I can honestly say that I have no cravings for alcohol and the thought of drinking makes me sick. I hope and pray that I always feel this way.

I am not saying that it has been easy though. Life now is a little hard being a sober person. Every one around me seems to drink and they all want to drink a lot! I don't relate to these people and can't participate in their social events. Some of them seem to take it the wrong way. I am part of an Alcoholic family and have to be around them some time. I walk away when they start pouring shots.
There is a part of me that misses the socializing but it's the new part of me that sits quietly smiling and feeling awesome, alive and grateful that feels just fine at the movies, Starbucks, Book Store, exercising etc.
I am so grateful to be the "sober guy".

Thanks for your help!