There's hope for everyone Nichole :) D |
daisybelle I have no clue what I’m doing this weekend I just want to stay at home and be boring and spend time with the kids but Saturday night my husband be off work and he will probably want to do something maybe I can talk him into taking the kids out as long as I can stay away from camping kayaking 4 wheeling and friends I’ll be good lol |
Originally Posted by xxxNICHOLExxx
(Post 6992550)
Just want to say I’m thinking of y’all for a minute I thought about drinking then I thought to myself why there isn’t a reason life is easier and feels better sober I am worried about the weekend but I think I’ll be good just keep reminding myself why I’m doing this idk there might be hope for me after all |
Originally Posted by Strawberry18
(Post 6992561)
Vipe what is our sobo date ? Came home an hou early from my babysitting tonight so I'm tucked up in bed ! Ready for zzzzzzzz |
08.10 Good morning Aprils Its very quiet here again, I hope you're all well, happy and sober. If any of you are lurking about in the background just reading please come and post, there's no need to struggle alone. Have a good Friday and loads of love ❤ to you. Xxx |
G.morning Donny boy, I hope work is kind to you today. Have a great weekend. Xx |
Originally Posted by Daisybelle
(Post 6993004)
G.morning Donny boy, I hope work is kind to you today. Have a great weekend. Xx |
Day I so t know how many lol I don't even know what day it is ! I do know I have only 13 long days until my mil returns to New Jersey !!! Whoop ! Love to all !!!! Xxx |
Hey all, Donny, so so sorry to hear about your friend's son. That is a truly tragic and senseless loss of life and the fact that alcohol clearly played a part just makes me despise it all the more I am so glad for this day to be over with (although at least I have had this day, your story puys things into perspective Donny) but it has been a crap day. Just silly little things going wrong but I have felt restless, irritable and discontent nearly all day and that is not a good place to be for an alcoholic like me. We did go to the circus which gave me 2 hours of relief and fun but after we went to a pub (!) and I was too weak to stand up for myself and tell my (new) friend that actually a pub was the last place I wanted to be, given how I was feeling on top of being in early sobriety. So ended up me, her and our 2 daughters and their new pomeranian puppy, which is bloody adorable to be honest and she orders a large glass of wine and I feel really odd. I don't really want it but I wanted the sense of ease and comfort that one glass would give me. However I am not afforded that luxury as that one glass will set me off and running so I sip on my sparkling water with ice and lemon but I really didn't want to be there. I am realising that pubs are pretty boring places if you are sober. So I bought my daughter her dinner there and my friend finished her wine and then she said she would just have one more (rolls eyes). I really felt like I was in an endurance test. Not as in, if I can stay andnot drink. There was no WAY I was contemplating a drink but I just DIDN'T WANT TO BE THERE. i just wanted to go home and I am so annoyed with myself that I was not stronger and honest and went along with something that not only did I not want to do but that could threaten my sobriety. It's something I will chat to my sponsor about and I need to work on those boundaries!!! Anyway, I am home now and my daughter is fast asleep and I am gonna have a quick shower and maybe watch something then bed. We are spending the weekend with my friend and her daughter and she doesn't drink!! So lovely. Sleep well all. Thanks for letting me rant!! |
Just doing my bedtime check in, hope you've all had a good day. It's been really wintery here today, cold, windy and it's absolutely poured down. This could be the end of our summer! The nights are drawing in too, it's dark by 9 p.m, winter is round the corner. How you doing Nichole? Have you managed to stay strong? I hope you have, but if not come and post anyway, we need to know how you're doing. Same goes for you too Erratic, take good care of yourself. You too Rowlands, please check in and let us know how you're doing. Donny boy, it doesn't have a cool, fall feel here, it has cold and windy blast! Well done on hitting 33 days, that's something to be proud of. I knew you could do it. Strawberry I hope you're getting some 'time out'for yourself. 13 days and counting eh, anyone would think you didn't want your m.i.l to go back home xx Suze, it sounds like you've had a bit of a day, hopefully you'll feel better tomorrow .Pubs really are boring places, I can relate to what you've said there about silly little things going wrong. Tomorrow's a new day. See you in the morning. Love to all. Daisybelle. xx |
Nothing too exciting going on. I’m making long term health/wellness, and ‘career’ exploration. The life coach is really good. This detox was really hard. Then it sent my auto immune system totally out of whack. Everything I eat right now is making me sick. The acne on my back and chest has been nuts since I stopped and now I have a wonderful second cyst in my back. Uugghh. Something is up. I looked it up and chronic inflammation is the biggest cause of these breakouts. So I’ll be working on that. Integrative Medicine APRN on Tuesday. I’ll need to make some money at some point and I’ve been cautious and listened to a ridiculously over cautious father, and the cautiousness has led to unmitigated failure. At this point I don’t give a crap. High risk is going to be the new norm and I’m comfortable with that. Unfortunately I can’t explain in detail but it’s a matter of publishing things on the internet for all eternity. Hopefully I can say more sooner rather than later. Number one priority: Don’t Drink. All else will follow. 38 days down. Goodnight ❤️ V🐍 |
Hi everyone, pretty late here but just wanted to check in. Football (American) is in full swing now so my Friday nights are now spent all over the place for next couple of months, and I couldn’t be more thrilled 😊 I love being there and we are the defending state champions so there is an air of pride when we roll up into someone else’s house and they know what we bring💪🏼 It also gives me something else to look forward too. I will Read back in the morning because I miss all my peeps and want to see what’s up, so will write more tomorrow because now it’s bedtime 👏🏼💜💜 |
Morn all x sry havent post, just my norm in being quiet and i have my woman crap thing away to happen so been sore mostly all week and just waiting for it to turn up. still waiting for my appointment with the hospital to see what they are going to do. Havent really got any plans for this weekend. Husband wants to go and see his friends who is playing in this thing which happens once a year in certain parts of the town where bands play music. I can't be bothered today so i think i will just stay home. will check in later to see how u all are doing. xxxx |
Hello Aprils!! I need to read back and catch up but wanted to check in as I’m on a work trip in San Luis Obispo now and heading further south tomorrow for some beach time and to visit some old friends! As you all know by now, I’m still in wine biz and we were at a winery ALL day and then a BBQ at the winemakers home in the hills. To say it’s difficult not to drink in this situation absolutely saturated with poison - is the understatement of the century. I poured sparkling water in a wine glass and like a skipping record continued to repeat the same phrase “I will get around to it - I need to hydrate” Eventually people get intoxicated and forget all about it. The light drinkers and me (non-drinker) seemed to gravitate in one group and the ones drinking more heavily were together. I feel it always turns out like that! Luckily I made it through. But it’s tough when they want to do a toast - they hand champagne to everyone and of course I have to take it and cheers and then set it down, grab my water and head to the bathroom. When I come back I literally just never go back to my glass and I move on. Truth is, I am not tempted to get loaded or escape or use alcohol to have more fun etc. I’m just in a unique predicament and through I am able to hop these hurdles at the moment, it’s a stark reminder that my career puts me between a rock and a hard place. It’s playing with fire and I simply don’t want to be around it anymore. But I truly feel change is certainly on the horizon. I did think of all of you today and wanted to say that you can get through the rough moments if you just take it minute by minute during those difficult/challenging events...parties, being in the pubs, weddings, etc etc) by just thinking about how you would feel if you (or I) drank. 1000% regret, guilty, disgust, shame, even suicidal in my case. Sober life can feel less exciting than drinking at times, but I can tell you this - about 6 of my peers will be waking up tomorrow with hangovers galore after acting drunk at the party, on the bus back and at the hotel tonight. Where I will be waking up early, happy to not have a horrendous hangover and wondering what I did, said, who I called etc.... instead I will be grabbing a nice coffee and taking a long walk along Pismo beach :). I am truly thankful that I made it through another day sober. Serenity, self love & sobriety is truly priceless 💕🙏🏼💪🏼 Hugs to you all ! Sweet dreams. 144 days of freedom from alcohol today. :) |
Morning my lovely Apriler's! Well today is a new day and I am going to work hard each morning to pull my naturally negative mind into a state of positivity!!! Blusey oh my! Just reading your post made me feel uncomfortable! But you did absolutely amazing! I think I would really struggle. It's weird cos I feel alot like you, I just don't want to get loaded amymore, I like being clear headed and connected but at the same time seeing it, smelling it, all around. Wow! But you got through and like you say will reap the benefits the next day. Plus no shame or guilt of what you may have done or said which is always a bonus!! So, I habe just read today's AA daily reflection which is exactly what I needed to hear today. THE GIFT OF BONDING Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS , p. 63 Many times in my alcoholic state, I drank to establish a bond between myself and others, but I succeeded only in establishing the bondage of alcoholic loneliness. Through the A.A. way of life, I have received the gift of bonding - with those who were there before me, with those who are there now, and with those yet to come. For this gracious gift from God, I am forever grateful. I needed to hear this today. My new friend I have is ten years younger than me, very beautiful and a very strong character. She is Russian and they are pretty straight talking! She is quite dominant and although I like her alot I am not sure she is really my sort of person and I feel a bit uncomfortable around her as I Sometimes feel like I don't really know what to say to her. Anyway she is a BIG drinker and as I said yesterday I ended up in a pub with her as I just felt I couldn't say no (that's another issue!) Not for the first time, l found myself thinkig that if I were drinking I would just get on so much better with her!!! I mean, what sort of insane thinking is that?! It's totally wrong on so many levels and that reading is right. The only bond i would be making is the bond of alcoholic lonliness. Anyway, I will have to see gow this friendship pans out. Maybe I am kust not suited to her. It could be as simple as that! All I know for sure is I have to protect my sobriety at all costs! Off to get ready now. I am going to be with non drinking people this weekend and it feels good!! Catch up later. Quit? How you doing? Sunshine? |
11.35 Good morning all, hope everyone is well. Pouring with rain here and cold and windy, though the sun is trying it's best to make a watery appearance. There is a huge music festival 'Creamfields' in my town over this weekend, about 4 miles from where I live, it's based in a huge field and runs over four days Friday to Monday, lots of different bands playing, we get the dubious pleasure of hearing it all from where I live day and night, but it's been quite subdued this year compared to past years, I think that's because it has rained torrentially since Thursday night and the ground must be like a mud bath, all those poor campers must be feeling cold and damp, I don't envy them one bit. I'm sorry you're still having 'issues' with your health Vipes and hope it evens out for you soon. Good luck with your money making mission, it all sounds very mysterious but I hope it works out, I'lI look forward to reading about it soon. Your Friday nights sound great fun Donny and I hope your team continues to have great success. It's good to have something like that to look forward to. Hi Erratic, sorry you've been suffering with women's problems and hope your aches and pains ease up and you can enjoy the weekend. Bluesey, I so envy you all that beach time you get, I just love the beach. You must have great fortitude to be like you were at the winery and then at a barbeque, that's hard going for someone in early sobriety. You really are rocking sobriety, you did yourself proud, 144 days is totally awesome. xxx I'm off now to go and feed my daughter's cat, I'll catch up again later. Thought for the day..... Sometimes the only closure you need is the understanding that you deserve better. |
Originally Posted by bluesymusey
(Post 6993980)
Hello Aprils!! I need to read back and catch up but wanted to check in as I’m on a work trip in San Luis Obispo now and heading further south tomorrow for some beach time and to visit some old friends! As you all know by now, I’m still in wine biz and we were at a winery ALL day and then a BBQ at the winemakers home in the hills. To say it’s difficult not to drink in this situation absolutely saturated with poison - is the understatement of the century. I poured sparkling water in a wine glass and like a skipping record continued to repeat the same phrase “I will get around to it - I need to hydrate” Eventually people get intoxicated and forget all about it. The light drinkers and me (non-drinker) seemed to gravitate in one group and the ones drinking more heavily were together. I feel it always turns out like that! Luckily I made it through. But it’s tough when they want to do a toast - they hand champagne to everyone and of course I have to take it and cheers and then set it down, grab my water and head to the bathroom. When I come back I literally just never go back to my glass and I move on. Truth is, I am not tempted to get loaded or escape or use alcohol to have more fun etc. I’m just in a unique predicament and through I am able to hop these hurdles at the moment, it’s a stark reminder that my career puts me between a rock and a hard place. It’s playing with fire and I simply don’t want to be around it anymore. But I truly feel change is certainly on the horizon. I did think of all of you today and wanted to say that you can get through the rough moments if you just take it minute by minute during those difficult/challenging events...parties, being in the pubs, weddings, etc etc) by just thinking about how you would feel if you (or I) drank. 1000% regret, guilty, disgust, shame, even suicidal in my case. Sober life can feel less exciting than drinking at times, but I can tell you this - about 6 of my peers will be waking up tomorrow with hangovers galore after acting drunk at the party, on the bus back and at the hotel tonight. Where I will be waking up early, happy to not have a horrendous hangover and wondering what I did, said, who I called etc.... instead I will be grabbing a nice coffee and taking a long walk along Pismo beach :). I am truly thankful that I made it through another day sober. Serenity, self love & sobriety is truly priceless 💕🙏🏼💪🏼 Hugs to you all ! Sweet dreams. 144 days of freedom from alcohol today. :) |
Originally Posted by snitch
(Post 6994097)
Morning my lovely Apriler's! Well today is a new day and I am going to work hard each morning to pull my naturally negative mind into a state of positivity!!! Blusey oh my! Just reading your post made me feel uncomfortable! But you did absolutely amazing! I think I would really struggle. It's weird cos I feel alot like you, I just don't want to get loaded amymore, I like being clear headed and connected but at the same time seeing it, smelling it, all around. Wow! But you got through and like you say will reap the benefits the next day. Plus no shame or guilt of what you may have done or said which is always a bonus!! So, I habe just read today's AA daily reflection which is exactly what I needed to hear today. THE GIFT OF BONDING Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS , p. 63 Many times in my alcoholic state, I drank to establish a bond between myself and others, but I succeeded only in establishing the bondage of alcoholic loneliness. Through the A.A. way of life, I have received the gift of bonding - with those who were there before me, with those who are there now, and with those yet to come. For this gracious gift from God, I am forever grateful. I needed to hear this today. My new friend I have is ten years younger than me, very beautiful and a very strong character. She is Russian and they are pretty straight talking! She is quite dominant and although I like her alot I am not sure she is really my sort of person and I feel a bit uncomfortable around her as I Sometimes feel like I don't really know what to say to her. Anyway she is a BIG drinker and as I said yesterday I ended up in a pub with her as I just felt I couldn't say no (that's another issue!) Not for the first time, l found myself thinkig that if I were drinking I would just get on so much better with her!!! I mean, what sort of insane thinking is that?! It's totally wrong on so many levels and that reading is right. The only bond i would be making is the bond of alcoholic lonliness. Anyway, I will have to see gow this friendship pans out. Maybe I am kust not suited to her. It could be as simple as that! All I know for sure is I have to protect my sobriety at all costs! Off to get ready now. I am going to be with non drinking people this weekend and it feels good!! Catch up later. Quit? How you doing? Sunshine? |
Originally Posted by Daisybelle
(Post 6994114)
11.35 Good morning all, hope everyone is well. Pouring with rain here and cold and windy, though the sun is trying it's best to make a watery appearance. There is a huge music festival 'Creamfields' in my town over this weekend, about 4 miles from where I live, it's based in a huge field and runs over four days Friday to Monday, lots of different bands playing, we get the dubious pleasure of hearing it all from where I live day and night, but it's been quite subdued this year compared to past years, I think that's because it has rained torrentially since Thursday night and the ground must be like a mud bath, all those poor campers must be feeling cold and damp, I don't envy them one bit. I'm sorry you're still having 'issues' with your health Vipes and hope it evens out for you soon. Good luck with your money making mission, it all sounds very mysterious but I hope it works out, I'lI look forward to reading about it soon. Your Friday nights sound great fun Donny and I hope your team continues to have great success. It's good to have something like that to look forward to. Hi Erratic, sorry you've been suffering with women's problems and hope your aches and pains ease up and you can enjoy the weekend. Bluesey, I so envy you all that beach time you get, I just love the beach. You must have great fortitude to be like you were at the winery and then at a barbeque, that's hard going for someone in early sobriety. You really are rocking sobriety, you did yourself proud, 144 days is totally awesome. xxx I'm off now to go and feed my daughter's cat, I'll catch up again later. Thought for the day..... Sometimes the only closure you need is the understanding that you deserve better. |
Daisy it’s not mysterious at all. I’m in a really badly designed system of Social Services, that discourages me from trying at every turn. I’m going to try to find a work around and get away from it. Healthcare in this country is hardly a guaranty, and I can’t lose it. President Obama got it pretty well cemented, and now it’s being chipped away at slowly but surely. If I go on, I’ll be making political statements so I’ll stop there. But it’s BullS**t. I tried to make it to the gym, but no way. I’m not feeling too good. There’s always next week? I’m going to have to face the fact that getting better is going to long term. I think I reached overload, quit drinking and I have a ton of healing to do. People with auto immune or other chronic illnesses should not be drinkers. 🤪 K-Girl??? Or who said they have HOSHIMOTO’S? Here’s a link to my new therapy. What are your drugs for auto immune? because I can’t take it anymore. The LDN takes a while to work but can work wonders. https://thyroidpharmacist.com/articles/low-dose-naltrexone-and-hashimotos/ Later on, I’m sure you’re tired of my crying 😭 V |
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