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I am glad that you are feeling a kinship with your NA groups Inc. "All it took was a few words and they knew the feelings, thoughts and struggles." I find that sentence very powerful. No explanations or apologies needed. You are in a room where all have been on similar paths as you. Life as an addict. These meetings sound like a pretty cool way to help start a new chapter in your life! |
I'm glad for your honesty and for the fact you're doing something about it Inc - NA sounds like just the ticket for you. :) I'm here to support people. That includes you Inc. I've been in the relapse seat many many many times myself. what finally got me out of that seat was finally seeing I was the problem, not the drugs I was taking...they weren't great either but they were just a symptom of a deeper malaise. It was hard for me to consider wholesale change but I'm so glad I did. I feel so much more alive since I re-embraced my real self physically mentally & spiritually - I reckon you will too Inc. :) D |
The NA meetings do sound positive... I've been thinking of trying to find a meeting around here. I feel insular at times... cut off. I feel like people like me but they don't know me. I was at a music festival yesterday. I was at the same one 5 years ago and a lot of the same bands were there. I even went with the same people. I did a lot of mental comparison between then and now and the balance was overwhelmingly positive, but on the down side, I noticed that I don't have friends anymore and neither do I socialise. I still find big events like yesterday's a little challenging and left to my own devices would not have gone (my wife's initiative). In the end I think it comes down to being different. When you have come up against an addiction and ended up on top (at least for now!) I think there is a part of you that isn't like everyone else. I think that maybe I need to be around people who get that. Anyway, Inc. keep fighting the good fight. You know it's worth it! |
Amp, I feel the same way as far as lacking friends. I surrounded myself with friends who drank as much or more than I did and that was our bond. It is difficult meeting people at our point of life. I get a ton of interaction with people due to the nature of my job, so I really value my time alone away from it. Meeting people for coffee isn't the same as meeting folks at a bar for drinks. Our culture is so alcohol drenched. Hanging at a bar sipping a coke just has little appeal to me these days. I know that I am at a better place today than I was a few years back. I hope you enjoyed the music fest. I used to spend a ton of time seeing live music and partying before the shows. I saw a big venue show a few weeks back. I told my wife that I hate going to shows, dealing with the crowded lots, overpriced everything, drunk kids and rent a cop venue security. Yet, when the lights go down and the band comes out, I still feel that wave of excitement running through me. Keep us posting on your progress Inc! |
Everytime I think my life has reached a point of stasis it changes :) 3 years ago I was living at the beach with very little human contact, but I was happy with that, Now I'm back in the city with a social life as busy as it ever was at any other time of my life, and I'm happy with that too. Not sure what the future holds but I'm excited for it :) Have a good weekend guys :) D |
Thanks Dee! I think the great thing about sobriety is that it frees the mind to explore so many possibilities. I am far more likely to try new things, listen to new music, explore different cuisines and just be more open minded with life in general. As Dee said, I am not sure what the future holds, but it doesn't worry me and I am looking forward to it for the most part. Have a great day all! |
Thanks Dee. That's good to know. Because yeah.... I can't be in a group of people and talk casually. IDK what to start with, and I have zero interest in what they say really. The fake intrest has got to be obvious. Well, it's not that bad. But close. Maybe it is that bad. I don't like being in a group. Or one on one for that matter. I used to. One on one at least. And that was before drugs and alcohol. NA is different. I hope somebody approaches me, and they do. We talk and we relate each other. Not only that, I can walk right up to a stranger and introduce myself there. There's zero fear I'll be judged. I know that I will be accepted 100%. Best part is, I don't need to worry about what I should say. I just say whatever is on my mind. Doesn't matter what it is. It's mind blowing. And again... So much different than AA. Tonight's meeting was in yet another town. I'm purposely doing 30 different meetings in 30 days. The funny thing is, I did that it hopes that maybe I'd get lucky and find one that I could at least tolerate. Half have been awesome, the other half good. Each one has at least 2 people I can connect with quickly and are potential for a sponsor. Tonight's meeting had 11 of us. And half were potential sponsors for me. |
Inc, you are not the first person here on SR to say how different NA and AA are. It seems folks tend to choose NA over AA. I have read that AA types want nothing to do with drugs and abusers. Addiction is addiction. I am glad you are finding a home. Best wishes for a great day guys! |
One more 5: 00 am shift then finally have back to back days off this week. Having split days off just doesn't feel like a weekend to me. Been raining heavily here last 24 hours. Hopefully, that will break this ongoing heat wave that has been dogging my area of the country. Happy Monday all! |
Hey guys! I read an interesting article yesterday in a Spanish paper about what they call an "epidemic" in the United States. They were talking about how a sheriff in Ohio has caused a scandal by suggesting that drug addicts should not be treated for overdose, and effectively, if they can't afford to pay for treatment should be left to die. I was shocked by the lack of humanity, but became even more shocked as I read the statistical analysis. Last year more Americans died of drug overdose (16000) than in the whole Vietnam war and that overdose is the biggest killer of under 50s including cancer, road deaths, etc. I think what shocked me most was that the pathway to addiction was a huge 75% through prescription opiate-based pain killers. Breaking it down, these people have had their lives ruined by paying for and taking approved prescription drugs that their doctors have recommended to them, and then, instead of recieving help and compensation, the Republican hard liners feel they should be left to die. I find it frankly frightening that this can even become a debate! From the outside America looks like quite a scary place right now! I'm not saying the UK or Spain are much better, though I think in terms of health care we are a little better off in Europe. I recently read a different article about how Portugal is having great success reintegrating addicts into society by finding them work and making them feel useful and valued. Maybe that's only possible in a small country but it would seem a better option to leaving people to die because they're sick with something that society at large is unwilling or unable to understand. Anyway... Sorry about going to town on that one!!! Hope you guys are well! |
In case you want to practice your Spanish! https://internacional.elpais.com/internacional/2017/07/22/estados_unidos/1500752729_017408.html |
This is an article about the Portuguese approach: http://www.medicaldaily.com/portugal-drug-experiment-heroin-decriminalizing-drugs-382598 |
not really on topic but I wanted you guys to know I'll be away for a few days - just a little vacation :) catch you in a few :) |
Have a good trip, Dee! |
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