Morning everyone and hi to the new members. This is a good place to be.

Starting day 4, which is usually when my mental cravings are the worst and I cave. Going to try to stay busy during the witching hours tonight I would love to take the dogs for a hike but the heat index is supposed to be 104 or something crazy! So instead I think I'll just put my jammies on and read a new book and let my husband take care of dinner.
I'm trying really hard to not let work stress pull me under. I run my own business and had an employee working for me one day a week so I could just work 40 hours. Now I'm alone and back at 50 hours. It's hard with MS to maintain that much energy.
I have t gone to an AA meeting yet. I really need to- but I've just been so tired. I know it sounds like an excuse but it's the truth. Right now I plan on going to one first thing Saturday morning and staying very close to SR over the next two days which are dangerous for me.
I'm trying to stay positive but feeling pretty down today. Hopefully it's just my body telling me it's pissed at all of the abuse and taking time to heal.

I restarted the clock yesterday because I restarted the way I am going to think about this. I had a terrific meeting with my psychiatrist, she gave me some very basic advice, and I got a good night's sleep. So I count today as Day 2 of this new and (so far) positive-feeling effort. But it is really always Only Day isn't it? Just today.

Day 8 has begun. Very anxious.

Dr had one other good point yesterday. You don't just get yourself back. You get a BETTER yourself back if you stay at it. That's something to think about.

Day 27. Sobriety is hard work I am finding out. I suppose my past sober periods I was just white-knuckling it. The only regular contact I have with people is through AA which had been hugely beneficial. When I first sobered up after rehab 5 years ago, I had 8 months sober, but loneliness and boredom set in so I decided to start Internet dating. I relapsed on the first date I went on. Wish I had just gone to AA instead because I think I was just looking for company with the Internet dates.

Day 20. I just went and got a nice manicure, followed by a trip to the store for a gallon of water and some healthy (ish) food. I read somewhere that the brain fog is related to nutrition deficiencies accrued while drinking, so I figure now is as good a time as any to start to tackle my poor eating habits. I have to be careful not to deprive myself, as I'm a person of extremes and can't risk a relapse.

Good morning class of June! Wasting if you're day 28 how are you June! LOL! Not that it isn't great to see you posting here anyways, was just curious! Huh! There hasn't been 28 days in June has there!??! Lol. P.S. - online dating has been a nightmare for my sobriety and relapses as well.

I'm starting day 3 today. Slept a little last night, woke up alot shivering in cold sweats, shaking. It was so cute, my kitty cat was snuggling my back and my puppy dog was snuggling my front all night. It's like they knew - mom is sick - gotta help keep her warm.

I'm feeling very wary and anxious being at work. I feel like "everybody knows". It's a yuck feeling. I wish I could just fast forward a few weeks...... but a few weeks from now scares the crrr out of me because that's when things start getting really dangerous with my brain! When things are fine, and I'm feeling healthy again, I start to get cocky and forget how bad they are every single time I pick up a drink. Glad to be here this morning and sober. Wish ya all 24.

I hate even posting this. But I'm starting over. Day 1 again.

My new apartment was A LOT smaller than expected & a lot less "homey" than I remembered. I now find myself having to get rid of A LOT of stuff. I have not accumulated much, but the things I do have matter. My grandmother's keepsakes. Furniture my grandfather built. Crafting supplies to aid in my recovery. Memories. I had already whittled it down knowing that this was coming and now I have to even cut that in half. Where to even start?

Gratitude. Positivity. I know gratitude & positivity are huge in recovery & I AM grateful. It's a safe neighborhood. It's affordable. Close to work. Nice amenities. A roof over my head. Supportive people in my life. I know it will all be ok. But there is such a thing as realism too. It is not what I expected, I feel claustrophobic, I have to get rid of stuff that matters. Fear of how this is going to affect my recovery. That is excruciatingly depressing!

It all got to me last night and after fighting it for hours, I caved to my AV. I learned though. 1. I was starving. I know from experience that hunger is a trigger. 2. I didn't call anybody/express my true feelings. I have such a bad habit of wanting the world to think that everything is perfect. Even now in my recovery, I feel like I have to put on a face like everything's good and I'm moving in the right direction. I know I can't do that anymore...it sets me up for failure.

Hope I wasn't too much of a "debbie downer", just wanted to come here and post and get it all out so this doesn't turn into a spiral/binge like it normally does. Getting back on the horse. Here's to Day 1.

Congrats to everyone on making it another day. Hope everyone has a great day :)

Hi Haley

Thanks for posting that. I'm also on day 1 and I know what you mean about not wanting to express your feelings (I'm British so sharing feelings doesn't come naturally) so reading your post was actually very helpful for me. Definitely wasn't a debbie downer!

Feeling a bit better
 

I'm on day 3 and I can tell my body is starting to change. It is a little rough with broken sleep and being a bit irritable, but I'm taking this as signs that my hard work is giving my.body a chance to eliminate the toxins. I'm trying not to stress about days that are not upon me yet. However, a few times I grew worried for the weekend. Even if it was my weekend to work I still drank. I'm going to try to not get ahead of myself and just focus on today.

Day 2 for me. This is my sixth re-set date, by the way; I guess it has all been experience and I know what to expect - forewarned is forearmed.
Welcome, Wigglyworm
Greetings to TryingInTexas, GAHaley, CharlyK
GAHaley, I hope there will be a simple solution for you, that you can safely store your keepsakes and the things that are most meaningful to you.
csaw1112 - I hope your day gets easier.
Have a good day, best wishes to all xx
:grouphug:

Does anyone else find they can't stop eating in the early days! Ugh! I just want to stuff my face constantly. It's annoying. I don't want to sober up and gain weight.

Actually, yes, I do. If that's what it takes.

I'd rather be overweight, successful and sober than a smelly, dirty, skinny waste-case!

Hello friends,

Checkin in. Not quite at the one week mark yet, its this Saturday if my count is right. Sounds like everyone is doing well. And those that have restarted again, well, at least you are still trying. Ive probably had a million day ones...

Hoping I can get my first week again. Things been crazy round here. I just keeping saying to myself, a stupid drink isnt gnna change all this crap up. So...dont JUST drink, would ya? And its NEVER ever just one..

Keep on everyone. :)

MissNewLife - I felt better when I realised I could eat smarter and healthier and still satisfy the new urge for sweet or substantial things.
e.g. canteloupe, fresh dates, dark chocolate, avocado, berries, a baked potato, rather than processed/packaged "foods".
And plenty of water.

Day 17 down.
Hugs to you all !

Hi all. I'm still here, gearing up to get through weekend no. 2.

Day 17 and no dizzy spells today. Still sluggish in the afternoon, but I'm starting to think it's my diet or lack there of. I still eat crap food cause I'm broke, it's something I need to work on.

Hi everyone :)

Just checking in. I am still trying, that is the best I can do right now.

2Wheelterror, I find that too, I am trying to eat healthy but it is so much more expensive.

Happy Friday everyone :)

ill be one day 19 in 2 hours, Im the same way with being hungry all day, but im staying away from processed stuff and sweets. well except for sweet tea and lemonaide, still getting used to drinking water more often so ive been having a lot for something with flavor.

I had some pretty terrible dreams today. I kept dreaming that I relapsed and was a few beers in at the start of the dream. I would wake up be happy it was a dream then have another just like it. I guess my AV is getting into subliminal messaging since I wont acknowledge it when Im awake.

Good job in the breakthru csaw! the groups should be a lot more beneficial now that you have overcome that hurdle.

Goodnight and good job to those ending their day and a happy sober day to the rest :)

Good morning everyone!

Just checking in. Starting day 2.

Slept quit well considering and woken up by the birds singing so here goes for a good day!

Sending hugs to all.