Family seem to be able to push buttons we never even knew we had!

I'm glad you're back on track Obo, sorry it's been so difficult for you these last couple of days.

I'm certain this will make your resolve for sobriety even stronger.
It's a lesson for us all, that's for sure.
Positive vibes being sent your way this evening.

Thanks freein.....

When i can get some time on a computer ill fill in all the details.

It was a huge lesson and has strengthened my resolve.

Sober is better....maybe i needed to learn that.

Hope all are well....

Stay tuned....

obo! I love your heart. Please continue in the direction youre headed :). We are here for you!

ST- I agree with Free- you've mentioned pushing people away before ... what's that all about ?

well, my husb took a job at a new church where the leader of the recovery group there is ... wait for it ... also a homeschooling dad. See, I told you, God really does answer prayers! lol.

haven't had a lot of time for posting but think of everyone here often,

hope everyone's doing well :)

I don't know izz, it seems like I don't think before I speak sometimes and end up with people not talking to me. Shrug

I was looking online at building healthy relationships and one of the things that I keep coming across is about there needs to be trust ... one of my MAJOR issues, since childhood and reinforced by my ex, kids and, as obo put it, outlaws.

Sorry you stumbled obo. Hopefully this will help you look for other ways to deal with the anger.

D

UP, do you see a therapist? If some of these issues are so long standing then a skilled therapist might be needed to help heal the wounds. I don't know what your health system is like over there, do you have access to psychotherapy or psychology services?

Izzy, that's good news about the new church leader. I hope you find your niche there.

It's been a heavy week for me here, I seem to have a back log of work both at work and at home. I'm trying not to get overwhelmed, I have to keep giving myself a pep talk. I'm trying to "stay present" and not worry about the future, but it's difficult. The company I work for is going through an unsettled time, there's lots of changes afoot. I just need to keep my head down and keep on trucking, but sometimes I need a bit of a break.

"This too shall pass"

I'm in for the weekend Bargain.

Im in for the weekend bargain...
much better today...
no worries really....

Stay tuned.

I don't currently see a therapist, not really fond of them ... trust thing, go figure. I will look into it free, also a little worried that the ex and kids will try and use me seeing a therapist against me.
I hope you get things straightened out there and things calm down.

That's good to hear obo.

In for the bargain too.

It's raining again here, at least I don't feel quite so begrudging of working today. I have my to do list at the ready.
I'm keeping a log of my time this week (inspired to do this after reading "168 hours"). I want to find out how much free time I actually have. I think I just tell myself that I have no time, whereas I do have plenty but perhaps am wasting too much of it. Anyway, this will give me some evidence either way.

Hope everyone's on track for the start of another sober week.

Morning fools...
still good.....
hope all are well...

Stay tuned...

Hi Fools,
I've missed all of you. I had very limited access to the Internet while I was gone, and was not able to load SR.
I just got off a 16.5 hour flight from Johannesburg to Atlanta, according to our pilot, the worlds longest nonstop flight. Fortunately this trip was so exhausting that I was able to sleep through most of it. Hopefully I'll also sleep through my next flight. It will feel so good to finally get home.
It was an incredible trip.
Obo, I'm sorry it's been such a difficult trip for you, but I am confident that your slip was a one time thing, and I hope you aren't beating yourself up over it. I spend a lot of time with my family trying to ignore things that have been said, and trying to stay detached from my reactions to them, so you have my full commiseration. Having said that, I definitely considered throwing my mom to the lions a couple of times over the last few weeks.
Up, I have always had a tendency to say exactly what the person I am talking with does not want to hear, and it has lost me more than a few friends through the years. I try to think of it as a screaning mechanism. I'm sorry it's been so hard for you lately. True friends will accept us with all of our flaws, and I really hope you find people who will do that with you. I think very highly of you.
Freein, I'll be back on the exercise wagon right along with you, just as soon as I get home, or at least after I've slept off this incredibly long travel experience. You are inspirational, and I thank you for it.
Izzy, I wish you the best of luck with your new job. What kind of work will you be doing? I hope your new church community is a good fit for you. It sounds like it's off to a good start.
You rock, Ms Rocks, and I'm not at all surprised that it shows in your academic successes. You have worked so hard for it, and I hope you're really proud of yourself.
Dee, much gratitude to you, as always, and I hope all is well.
To our many absent fools, I hope you continue to lurk here, and know that you are missed.
My next flight is about to board, so I'll send some photos later. I can't wait to share images of some of the animals I saw.
Love to you all.

Great to hear you've had an exciting time, Adna. And equally great to hear you're heading home safe and sound.

Yep, my exercise plan has worked quite well over the past fortnight. Keeping a written log every day makes a huge difference to my accountability. Even when I'm pushed for time, I've been able to squeeze in something active.

My energy levels are low at the moment though, I don't know why. I think it's because I miss having Sunday's at home, so I'm not getting as much time by myself as I'm used too. I don't resent seeing my parents every week, we usually have a happy time, but it does take its toll on my energy. I know I'll look back one day with few regrets, so it's a price worth paying.

Life is a funny old thing.

Now upset with myself.
Broke a golden run.
it took me so fast......
no other answer but to start again.

My advice....... don't do it.

Stay tuned.......

I'm sorry to hear that Obo, but you still have a lot of sobriety behind you, you just need to connect back in to your true, clear thinking self. The gremlins run wild for a while if they've been given any attention. Focus on your healthy future, being teetotal really is the better path. We're here for you, cheering you on.

And thank you so, so much for sharing with us, it's an important warning for us all. Bless you my friend :grouphug:

Thanks freein..
Drank last Thursday...
Was fine till today.....
I was proud of my count but stopped ticking boxes after a year.
In there is the answer.
An ego thing......again.
Av is niggling with old school thoughts and justifications.

Day 4.

Stay tuned dudes im telling you...

Be proud of all you accomplished and learned Obo - that's still all there regardless of the day count :)

Hi Adna - I'm good thanks :)

hope everyone else is doing ok too :)

D

Hi Fools - I have been messing around for a couple of months now - nothing extreme, but it is just such an "empty" existence. I am uncertain about my future right now, but am here to re-commit to complete sobriety. I am sober tonight but did drink & smoked earlier today, so tomorrow will be my 1st sober day. I need to be accountable & this is where I feel safe to start over....

Hi Mariah, great to hear you're back on track. The days will soon add up again. The more important thing is the commitment you've already made to your future. How's your garden at the moment? Mine's a holiday park for slugs! They're running amok through the veggies.

Obo, when do you get back to HK?

How are all the other fools doing?