Just huge nods Tink.....we have to show up and face life, and sometimes it takes more strength than we have....the days we make it when we can't....the times we fake it to make it give us back our self-esteem, I believe. :hug: s

Hey all, another day in the bag, no thoughts about drink 2day, I know they'll come though!!

Harry, I dont think u should promise ur wife, just hopefully u can show her this time. I've promised my hubbie numerous times & it just annoys him now. I haven't said the words "IM STOPPING DRINKING", I'm going to just try harder to do it,.

I've not slept great this week, hot & sweaty, restless & tonight I almost felt flu-like, so I got into bed with a book at 8pm!! Haha!! Literally just after I put my kids to bed!!

Anyway, I'm sober & doing better than I was this time last week!!

It's good to have an early night love :)
And my flu-like symptoms were worse and worse every time I quit. :hug: s

...morning.

It does pass Lila. Stick with it, a couple more days and you will sleep properly, and wake up feeling transformed, a different version of yourself. It is a great feeling and its not far off for you now.

Hi Bob...good you doing better and not facing the storm. Hope it stays that way. Totally agree with you re your other comments too...

Welcome Ravel, that's a great rabbit pic...fingers crossed for you too..glad you are here with us, we all have a long way to go, but this is a great place to start.

Harry....I could write a lot about your situation, having been there myself. It didn't end well. There are some good responses here too. My suggestion? Accept that you aren't going to be able to negotiate your way out the situation as it currently is. I made the mistake of thinking I'd again successfully 'talked it through'. I hadn't. The resentment and progressive detachment were quietly continuing. You might have to accept a period of estrangement, use the difficult time to make some progress on your own difficulties. Don't try and get a quick fix by making the right promises, she's probably not receptive to words right now. And, from a male perspective, she needs to see you are strong enough to fix yourself, desperately offering promises and committments isn't the look you need right now. Good luck.

Hi Pouncer....those cravings. They can just flash at you out of nowhere, its weird. Day 5....you must be feeling a bit better now?
Hope you feel better soon Tinkerbeau....try not to feel down about what happened....it happened, today is a new day, you are here and that is a big positive thing. And you got the first three days.

Sleep is coming soon Loulou....hang in there.

....I've been sleeping a lot. It's an incredible relief to be rid of the drinking nights, the early hours sweaty sleeplessness, the dark hours past life reviews, doing the anxious $ calculations, the pounding heart. Dozing into weird dreams before dawn, then jerking awake to another exhausted day of relief drinking. I really dont want to go there again.

Later.

I'm in for September Class. Lost some momentum the last couple months and ready to refocus. Good luck everyone!

Welcome stinman and Ravel :)
Welcome mariposa - congrats on 30 days :)

Glad you're sleeping sodasoba that's a major thing :)
Hope your sleep getts better soon LouLou!

Hope the days get easier for you TB and Rattle and Hum

congrats on your progress pouncer and Lou lou :)
Hi Lila, 1 step, and Runner :wave:

Harry -I'd promised people many items - and meant it - but then gone on to break that promise

Bob and Carl are absolutely right that actions speak louder than words, and that you need to do this for yourself because you want to change and be better...not to prove anything to anyone else.


We all want to make it up to those we love or save relationships...but doing it for those reasons the fear will often fade...doing it because you want to be a better person is the only motivation that lasts IMO.

D

Checking for day 48 done, cannot wait for day 50!

way to go NicLin :)

D

I made it through day 1.. Im not sure what will happen but for now it's about thinking 24 hours in front..

'onya' Red.....
I find thinking too far ahead, or even counting days...all a bit daunting. So just a day at a time. And now you've done the hardest one.

I just turned down being shouted out for tea and then turned down going out for a drink in town...
I love going out for tea but I don't enjoy it yet without booze so best option is NO

This thread is really active!:c011:
Glad so many of you have joined SR and supporting eachother! :grouphug:Stay close and keep posting!
ODAAT will add up the sober days to a Sober September 2019 Month!:You_Rock_

Hi Chloe! Good to see you again. Soda, thanks for the encouragement. Hi Red.

On day 3 here and continue to feel better, however, a little cautious about that. My last recovery time lasted almost 3 weeks. Yes, the same thing that would have lasted less than a day 20 years ago.

I have been reflecting a lot since my breakthrough yesterday. Hearing people say that you have to do it for yourself is not the same as actually realizing to your core from actual events, that it is true. After all, self destructive behavior is kinda what a lot of us do. It's what I know so well. So, entering into a new phase of this disease leaves me with a lot of questions. Maybe Dee has some magic links that I can read through? It's not like I can turn a switch and have a different attitude about myself. Maybe there is someone here who is at the same point, I'd love to hear from you.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Hi Bob

I've nothing specific on self destructive behaviour - but I do have several links of stopping negative self talk which is certainly a component of deciding to engage in self destructive behaviour.

Challenging negative thinking | ReachOut.com Australia
Negative Self-Talk: 9 Ways To Silence Your Inner Critic
Challenging Negative Self-Talk | Psych Central
Positive thinking: Reduce stress by eliminating negative self-talk - Mayo Clinic
Change Your Inner Talk From Negative To Positive

Its not an easy change if you've been thinking certain ways and indulging in certain behaviours for years maybe even decades but changes can be made.

For me personally the longer I stayed sober the more I faced my problems, the more I faced my problems the more I felt better about myself and the more I felt better about myself the less I felt inclined to indulge in self destructive behaviors.

D

Thanks Dee!

This. I love this.

Good morning lovely September class and fantastic dear Red. :) :hug: s