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-   -   Class of September Part 1 2019 (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/441570-class-september-part-1-2019-a.html)

Tinkerbeau 09-08-2019 02:04 PM

Hi everyone well made it through weekend sober. It wasn't easy and i really had to battle with the AV at times, but i got through and have had a lovely weekend with my son and am now proud that i will wake up and start another week sober and actually refreshed from a weekend.

Sober369 09-08-2019 02:11 PM

I really need to step up my recovery plan somehow. I just had a hard time coming home AGAIN. I know you all must be tired of hearing about it, because I am. I didn't drink, and I am, again, so glad and grateful. I need to bottle this feeling and carry it with me everywhere I go. I even stopped at the liquor store! I sat there and ate Bojangles food, only a little. I was listening to a Recovery Elevator podcast, it was about cravings, and at first it helped a lot but then the speaker started talking about his drinking days and it stopped helping so much.
I was starving, I thought, but after I had a few bites of food I didn't want anymore. And I didn't want to drink, either. I was just about to call Suze, but the desire for a drink just evaporated. When I got home, I just can't express how grateful I was that I didn't buy any booze.
I don't want to keep doing this. I'm afraid the day will come that it's just too much for me and I drink again.
I'm on day 12! Tuesday is 14 days, but I think it's Wednesday that I count it as two weeks.
Sorry for rambling on everyone. When does this get easier, when do the cravings stop, and how are all of you handling it when you have one?

Tinkerbeau 09-08-2019 02:18 PM

Hi sober I've had cravings this weekend too, yesterday alot of sweets till i felt to full that drink was last thing i wanted. Today i been bit better though craving was worse, i just keep telling myself to see how i felt after dinner then see after shower and just kept putting off really, and reminding myself i don't want to feel hungover in morning. Very basic so sorry i not got more to offer, but it worked.

bobdrop 09-08-2019 02:53 PM

Karen-I was just sitting here, wondering the same thing. I even got up and looked to see how much vodka and rum there was in the house. A lot. Playing the tape forward usually does the trick, but how long will this last is the question. Being over the top irritable the last couple days really doesn't help anything. Just want the feeling to go away. Had already planned on putting my OCD to work starting tomorrow with a focus on eating better.

sodasoba 09-08-2019 03:08 PM

Sober 369,
Understand where you are coming from.
My previous sober runs, drinking, cravings haven't been a problem during the first days, weeks. This time....they have appeared early and frequently.
This is a worry, can't help but feel it is result of kindling.
Like you, I experienced this a couple of times this weekend. Not entirely sure how to deal with it, but aware that I have to try and learn some new approaches.

This past weekend I allowed myself to sit with the discomfort rather than immediately seeking some external means of just making it go away. Maybe it has to be a process of accepting that its going to be uncomfortable for a period of time. By doing this....maybe I am learning that, yes, it does go after a while. Learning that you don't necessarily have to race out and pour some drinks on it to make it go away right now, this very minute.

The discomfort, the craving will pass, you don't always have to act instantly on it. And acting on it may provide short term relief, sure. But we all know where it goes from there.

At this point, if I'm honest, I'm not really saying no to drinking...just postponing it and trying to find some different ways to deal with the sudden need for it in the meantime.

Sure, probably not the ideal situation. Some will probably respond to this with the notion that drinking has to be totally removed from your repertoire of responses, the 'off the table' thing.

Ok...new week. Let's do it!
later

Dee74 09-08-2019 03:19 PM


At this point, if I'm honest, I'm not really saying no to drinking...just postponing it and trying to find some different ways to deal with the sudden need for it in the meantime.
I hope that changes, sodasoba.
Drinking life is untenable.

Sober life is not - but it's a process of change, not an event :)

D

Sober369 09-08-2019 03:20 PM

Thanks Tinker, Bob and Sodasober. It helps a lot to know others are going through this, too, and what you do about it. I'm sorry you are going through it though. It is awful. But, I'm so glad we're all sober.
For me, I am saying NO to drinking. It's an absolute for me. But, I don't have all the answers, or even very many of them. It does make me worry for you, Soda, but only you can know where you are with this and what you need.
I feel for you, Bob, having all that booze in the house. That would make it really hard for me, but I am a hard case. I do have it at work, and I looked at it and almost pocketed a mostly empty bottle of Brandy tonight. Good heavens I'm a mess....
I'm about to give Charley a bath, then I'm taking a bath and getting in bed early with a book. My sobriety tracker says I've saved almost fifty dollars, so I think I owe myself a new recovery book. Amazon here I come!

sodasoba 09-08-2019 03:29 PM

Perhaps I didn't express myself very well.

I can't deny wanting to drink. But just have to refocus on finding ways to step around the wanting when it happens.

Bob....no I couldn't have drink in the house. Tho while I'm writing that I realise that there is a litre bottle of cooking sake in the kitchen. And, yeah, I've drunk that it in the past. But right now....I don't even look at it as a drink.

Midton 09-08-2019 04:06 PM


Originally Posted by venuscat (Post 7264067)
I was actually thinking the same thing....FBL is the loveliest man, and a wonderful friend of mine.....and Dee's...... :hug: s

Thanks, I’ve reached out to him in a message

venuscat 09-08-2019 04:11 PM


Originally Posted by Sober369 (Post 7264271)
I really need to step up my recovery plan somehow. I just had a hard time coming home AGAIN. I know you all must be tired of hearing about it, because I am. I didn't drink, and I am, again, so glad and grateful. I need to bottle this feeling and carry it with me everywhere I go. I even stopped at the liquor store! I sat there and ate Bojangles food, only a little. I was listening to a Recovery Elevator podcast, it was about cravings, and at first it helped a lot but then the speaker started talking about his drinking days and it stopped helping so much.
I was starving, I thought, but after I had a few bites of food I didn't want anymore. And I didn't want to drink, either. I was just about to call Suze, but the desire for a drink just evaporated. When I got home, I just can't express how grateful I was that I didn't buy any booze.
I don't want to keep doing this. I'm afraid the day will come that it's just too much for me and I drink again.
I'm on day 12! Tuesday is 14 days, but I think it's Wednesday that I count it as two weeks.
Sorry for rambling on everyone. When does this get easier, when do the cravings stop, and how are all of you handling it when you have one?

CALL ME!!! or TEXT....if you get here again, please do love.... xx :hug:

You are not rambling....you are doing exactly what we need to do..... :hug: s

venuscat 09-08-2019 04:14 PM


Originally Posted by Tinkerbeau (Post 7264273)
Hi sober I've had cravings this weekend too, yesterday alot of sweets till i felt to full that drink was last thing i wanted. Today i been bit better though craving was worse, i just keep telling myself to see how i felt after dinner then see after shower and just kept putting off really, and reminding myself i don't want to feel hungover in morning. Very basic so sorry i not got more to offer, but it worked.

You don't know how important this is....you keep offering ways to get through the cravings, or the AV attacks....and you keep building your own skills at the same time. So :) And :hug: s

Sober369 09-08-2019 04:45 PM

I will call you next time for sure, Suze. Thanks so much for that. I hope it doesn't happen tomorrow. It's going to be a huge, long week for me, working straight through next weekend and then most of the next week. It's National Assisted Living Week. We are going to be rocking! I'll be tired though. I will try to pace myself.
Putting off the drink for later is a great plan, and I'm adding it to my list, thanks Tinker!
Hang in there everyone, it does get easier! When is my question. But I know it's coming!

Sober369 09-08-2019 04:46 PM

Forgot to say, for my 'sober treat' I bought "Unwasted, my Lush Sobriety". It will be here Wednesday!

venuscat 09-08-2019 04:47 PM

:) :hug: xx

RattleAndHum 09-08-2019 04:48 PM

Thank you, venuscat. My wife and I will get through. And it’s more likely to happen without alcohol :)

Runner1234. I’m a football fan as well. Instead of drinking, I let myself indulge on food a little more. I’m a DC sports fan, so football-wise, the day wasn’t great. But otherwise, things are pretty good!

7 days sober. Longest time in a while. Back to work tomorrow, and I’m not filled with dread. A good feeling.

Keep it up, all.

Mike

Pouncer 09-08-2019 06:11 PM

Glad to see everyone plugging along.

Mike, my husband and I get in small tiffs around a relapse, too. It's frustrating, but things always seem to go back to normal soon.

Karen, I hope you get through this hump. The first 3 months are always the hardest for me. :)

I am not counting days, since counting days makes me anxious, but I am somewhere around 9 or 10 days (?) Cravings are less frequent and I am going back to my pre-relapse brain.

Hope everyone had a great weekend.

Wastinglife 09-08-2019 09:08 PM

Count me in the class. Just finished day 2. I am not sleeping much because of the withdrawal anxiety. Had a panic attack during a meditation at an AA meeting strangely. I thought meditation was supposed to relax the person. Obviously, I need to figure the technique out.

Dee74 09-08-2019 09:27 PM

welcome wastinglife :)

I think meditation is a skill like anything else - you get better the more you practice it and it 'works' better.

D

ReadyAtLast 09-08-2019 10:53 PM

Hello again,
I can relate. It used to be struggling to stay sober at 4-6 weeks for me. Now I'm struggling to string even a few days together. Although if I'm honest with myself it is because I wanted to drink more than I wanted to not drink. but I feel my drinking escalating again and again and again

Now I am at the point where I want to be sober more than I want to drink. I know I need a plan/new plan/change of plan. But fundamentally, I know what I am like. I have to want to be sober more than I want to drink, more than anything.

Day 2. Wishing you all a good day.

sodasoba 09-08-2019 11:18 PM

Well, that's the bottom line RAL.
Yeah....I find myself wanting some beers. Or thinking that it'd be v good to have some beers.
But also know that the beers would be good for, maybe, an hour or so? Then I'm just getting drunk. Then I'm sleepy,
4 or 5 hours later I'm awake in the dark, dehydrated, heart pounding and its 3a.m. or something. You know what the can't sleep night thoughts are like. Then maybe doze a little before dawn....before awake again, sweating. Feeling like ****
But, hey, there's some beers still left in the frij.

On it goes....
....right now I just couldn't face going back to that again.


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