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-   -   Halloween Weekenders Thread 27-31/10 (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/417993-halloween-weekenders-thread-27-31-10-a.html)

Hawkeye13 10-26-2017 06:39 AM

I'm in

Sending you support MB--that isn't easy but you have a great attitude and will get through it and come out stronger.

Sort of like boxing a stronger opponent. . .
You learn and get better but get some serious whacks in the process

Shout out to Tetra--how are you?

MLD51 10-26-2017 07:22 AM

I'm in for another sober weekend.
HAF - I used to get drunk to hand out candy, too. I'm not sure I'll hand any out this year. I won't be home until about 7 and by then most of the kids will be done. I might just hide after I get home. If I don't turn on the outside lights or the living room light they won't ring the doorbell. My son doesn't like to help hand out candy anymore. So it's all up to me and the dog goes nuts barking every single time a kid comes to the door. I feel kind of bad about this but it's such a pain. There are plenty of other houses in my neighborhood that happily participate.

biminiblue 10-26-2017 07:26 AM

Gooooood Morning. 7:22 AM here.

Coffee and it's bill-pay day. Yay. ish.

Glad I'm able to do it, and I pray I'll die with ten cents in my bank account.




Yeah. I realize that's not a good life plan. :lol:


Dia de Los Muertos this weekend. Excellent. I miss BigSombrero.

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com...7b757f2f7a.jpg

Gilmer 10-26-2017 10:28 AM

Marty, you can you can always just put a giant bowl full of candy on your doorstep with a sign that says “One per customer, please!”

That way after the first two kids take it all, the others will know that at least you made the effort.

By the way, Andy, that’s a REALLY COOL pumpkin! :c014:

SaturatedSeize 10-26-2017 12:54 PM

Thanks for the thread, a great reminder for a high risk time.

The old me would look forward to this weekend for months. Plan the perfect costume, plan the pre-game activities, meet up with friends, go out and not care about safe transportation, avoiding conflict, or the after event hangovers.

For those struggling, recognize the high risk time and MAKE A PLAN!

For me, I'm staying home this weekend and surrounding myself with supportive friends and family. I want to watch scary movies (NEW SAW MOVIE COMES OUT TOMORROW :D) and cook chili, and relax at home. It's been a heck of a long week for me and my couch and lounge chair are calling my name.

Happy Halloween weekend all and stay safe.

Gilmer 10-26-2017 01:00 PM

One year I saw an ad for a movie called “Chopping Mall.”

I almost died laughing!

Misc72 10-26-2017 05:08 PM

I'm in! Heading to Vegas on Sunday!

STDragon 10-26-2017 05:41 PM

Did finish the garage job just yet, I didn't expect to. It took a whole summer to get it into the state it's in. Bix, I decide today to throw out as much as possible, I don't know why I'm hanging on to old parts, scraps of wood, card board and miscellanious items. It's all going.

Tetra 10-26-2017 05:48 PM


Originally Posted by Hawkeye13 (Post 6650452)

Shout out to Tetra--how are you?

I could not bring myself to write until now. Last Friday I got dragged into my managers office and she said she had received a complaint about me. I wrote about that before. That I was coming in late and some one said that I had become withdrawn and she was worried. I could not sleep all weekend as I am worried that I will lose my job. So I continued on as best I could. She would not tell me who made the complaint but I know.

On Monday I mentioned it casually to my colleagues. The one who I suspect made the complaint was not there. They were surprised and told me that it definitely was not anything to do with them.
I admit I’m struggling and have been for the past while. I discussed it at length with my dad at the weekend and he said “when did this start for you? You always said in spite of the stress you loved your job”. So I thought about it and realized that it began when I got my wrist splint off at the end of August. My father said “that would make sense. The fractured wrist took more out of you than you realized”.

So I got to work a bit late on Tuesday last. Every one was there but the room seemed suspiciously silent.

So one of the girls phones rang and she answered and said “ok great”. So she said “our manager is ready for us now” and every single one of them got up and left without telling me where they were going.

So I was sitting there wondering what’s going on. Then my manager rang me and said “the girls want to talk to me about you. I will send for you in a little while”.

So I was on my own and panicking for about a half hour. She did try to call me when I was in the bathroom. Another secretary from the office across the hall came into me with a sympathetic look and said “you are wanted”.

So I went up and had to sit through a character assassination in that “Kangaroo court” with no previous warnings and no way to defend myself. My hands were shaking. My mouth was dry. I had no clue what to do. Interestingly all of the girls were silent throughout except for the one who I suspect caused all of this. One of the other girls did say that my work for my own consultant has been impeccable at all times. But apparently I wasn’t being helpful enough when one of the girls was on compassionate leave, also I’m too quiet and don’t ask for help when I’m in trouble.

The one who started all of this - her own consultant had been on annual leave for the last 3 weeks. When she goes every thing stops. No clinics, no theatre nothing. When my consultant goes on leave there are “reduced clinics” which means about 30 patients at each clinic. I work for one of the busiest doctors in there and she has had nothing to do for 3 weeks so if anyone had time to help out it would have been her.

So yeah I had to sit and listen to me being criticized. No one likes criticism. However this could have been handled in a much better way

I didn’t know what to do. I suspect people felt sorry for me on Tuesday afternoon as people were asking “would you like a coffee?”

I did not want to go to work at all on Wednesday. I was sitting on my bed fully dressed but I couldn’t make myself leave the bedroom. Eventually I did leave and I was late but you know, if our manager asked me why I was late I was going to say “I was so upset by yesterday that I could not sleep”. I spoke to my dad about it at length and he said “well done for going in. I’m sure it was hard for you”.

The world just does not like quiet people. And I’m sitting here typing on my phone and I remember all of those years when I was living in my parents attic and too afraid to leave the house and even get the bus to town. Imagine that I was once too afraid to get on a bus. Now I get up and go to work no matter how I feel. And my mom often complains about this or that and my dad points at me and says “why are you complaining? We have our own miracle sitting right here”.

I know I am never going to be the life and soul of the party and I hate my quietness. But you know to have to sit and listen to people criticizing the one little thing that you despise about yourself, it’s so difficult.

I have a full time job for a demanding consultant. I will try and be more helpful to others if my actual job does not suffer as a result.

I’ve just lost all enthusiasm for this. I should also say that when this lady’s husband was very ill last year I worked until 9 PM a lot of nights to do her typing.

So that’s my story.

It’s a bank holiday weekend here. I will probably go to my parents on Saturday. At least my dad will be pleased to see me. He bought some steaks for my arrival and I asked him to get the good ice cream. By that I mean Ben and Jerry’s.

STDragon 10-26-2017 05:58 PM

I bet if your consultant knew what happend, he'd soon raise a stink with your manager. That was unfair and un-professional to put you up in front of the girls like that.

DreamCatcher17 10-26-2017 06:07 PM

I'm in for a sober weekend! This will be the first year my son will be going trick or treating. He was sick last year and too little the year prior. Tonight we got his dragon costume an he's super adorable in it, his favorite part is his tail.
I'm just glad I'll remember the entire evening with him. Hopefully it won't be too cold and honestly I'll probably recycle the candy as he only gets a sucker for a hair cut, other than that no candy. He's 2 and already high energy, no need to add to that. Haha
I'm sure I'll take a few of my favorites, but I also don't need it around.

Happy weekend!

STDragon 10-26-2017 06:10 PM

Dragon costume.... excellent choice!

BixBees505 10-26-2017 06:56 PM


Originally Posted by STDragon (Post 6651066)
Did finish the garage job just yet, I didn't expect to. It took a whole summer to get it into the state it's in. Bix, I decide today to throw out as much as possible, I don't know why I'm hanging on to old parts, scraps of wood, card board and miscellanious items. It's all going.

Go for it!

andyh 10-26-2017 07:21 PM

really sorry you had to go through that Tetra. your manager's behaviour was insensitive & unprofessional. it's bad enough to belittle an employee in front of others, but to call a meeting to do so is totally unacceptable & is basically bullying.

can you have a chat with your HR department? I bet they'd have a fit!

Dee74 10-26-2017 08:32 PM

I'm sorry that things at work are so fraught Tetra.

D

theVman31 10-26-2017 10:28 PM

Good morning weekenders.

Its a good day for going (home) to France.
I will have a bone to pick with Hertz who rented me out a car with completely bald tyres... (wife and child in car) Ireland is a rainy country for slicks !

Gilmer 10-26-2017 11:45 PM

That’s outrageous, Vman! I hope you can get some sort of refund from Hertz.

I’m so sorry, Tetra. What a wonderful, wonderful man your dad is. What a deep comfort to have a man like him in your corner. :hug:

Lava256 10-26-2017 11:54 PM

In for the weekend.

Halloween is not a big thing here so I’m/we’re doing nothing. Normal weekend for us. But have a great, sober one everyone else.

petals 10-27-2017 12:16 AM

Aw Tetra that was awful and totally unprofessional of them. Well done for going to work. Would now perhaps be a good time to look around and see what other jobs may be out there?
Love and hugs to you xxx

saoutchik 10-27-2017 01:13 AM

That's astonishingly unprofessional Tetra, I know how hard you are trying. It sounds like it might just be the one person trying to create a drama. As Andy said that is essentially bullying.

First day after my mini detox diet. Coffee tasted good.


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