Sober without AA?
 

Hey everyone I am have tried AA once when I was 23 and now at 24 I am still not thinking it is for me. For those that have been sober long term without AA please share your tools. I have received some backlash before about not giving AA a fair chance but I really want to hear from those that have led successful sober lives without AA and how they did it

I got (and stayed) sober with weekly counseling with my addiction counselor and daily visits to SR. I no longer see the counselor but still come here every day to read and post. I have six years and four months and am feeling very good about my sober life. :)

Wow least! Very nice to hear that. Six years is beautiful.

I've used SR more than any other method. At separate times, I've also used SMART, AVRT, and Women For Sobriety. Later on, I used IOP followed by individual counseling.

I think the most important thing to note is that I finally got sober when I meant business. It was my desire for change, my sustained motivation, and the various means of support and tools such as 'urge surfing,' distraction, 'playing the tape through,' and so on, all used in conjunction that worked for me.

Personally, I believe what worked for me was the desire for a change followed by action. This required confidence in my ability to change (and some faith), along with the tools to change (all the aforementioned programs/methods/tools).

I don't know if I could consider it long term but I'm somewhere around 3.5 years. I did all the popular stuff at first and found it wasn't my thing. There's lots of other ways and there are links on this sight. Check the secular connections forum. I read a lot early on. The only real way to success is wanting it.

What exactly is SMART? and where can I learn more about it? Do you still do outpatient? Thank You this gives me hope because I had thought that if I stopped AA I wouldn't have hope! but I do have a cousin that stopped using without AA so I knew there had to be more people that have been successful out there


QUOTE=Soberpotamus;5898115]I've used SR more than any other method. At separate times, I've also used SMART, AVRT, and Women For Sobriety. Later on, I used IOP followed by individual counseling.

I think the most important thing to note is that I finally got sober when I meant business. It was my desire for change, my sustained motivation, and the various means of support and tools such as 'urge surfing,' distraction, 'playing the tape through,' and so on, all used in conjunction that worked for me.

Personally, I believe what worked for me was the desire for a change followed by action. This required confidence in my ability to change (and some faith), along with the tools to change (all the aforementioned programs/methods/tools).[/QUOTE]

I tried several different AA meetings - and went for several months but didn't get much out of them. I had a sponsor but that did not help.
I never understood how going everyone in a room sharing a thought on a topic helps one stay sober.
AA has helped thousands - no denying that. But, I have a son and a job and it is much easier and convenient (and therefore I use it often) on SR to ask a question or read a discussion about something.

Thanks buddy!


QUOTE=soberwolf;5898172]Self Help Addiction Recovery | SMART Recovery®[/QUOTE]

SMART stands for Self-Management for Addiction Recovery and can be found here: Self Help Addiction Recovery | SMART Recovery®

No, I don't do outpatient anymore. I did a 20-day outpatient program and several months of individual counseling. I attended some aftercare meetings as well. I am now over three years sober and feeling stable and happy with my sobriety. SR is all the maintenance I need. I have considered an occasional AA or WFS face-to-face but I'm so busy these days I don't have extra time to spare away from my family. If I were struggling, I'd make time. And I'd recommend that to anyone.

3.5 years is great! What did you read early on exactly?

Hi sky walker! :)

I use Rational Recovery and SR! Lots of great alternatives in the Secular Forum!

And you're right SP....the desire to change comes from within. No program...no matter what it is...can KEEP you sober. That responsibility falls squarely on us.
Xo

Following. I'm not long term yet (two months today) but have relied on SR and a few close acquaintenances. I'm an introvert to begin with and a working mom of two kids - the idea of trying to also work meetings into life stressed me out which seemed counterproductive.

I used books in the first couple of years and then I found SR and I have been here for years. I know for sure that balance in my life is what keeps me in recovery. That means exercise, reading spiritual books, spending time on SR and always working on gratitude.

LifeRing is great if they have meetings near you. they are also online. I read tons of books on the subject including Rational Recovery, Sober for Good, Allen Carr's books, Jason Vale, Empowering your Sober Self.

I respect any path that leads to sobriety, but don't throw the baby out with the the bath water. A lot of the newfangled "AA" meetings are nothing more than people sharing thoughts in a touchy feely manner grown out of talk therapy.
That's not AA friend. That's talk therapy. AA is a program of action, laid out in the 12 steps. Find someone to guide you through THAT, and you will feel better.
I also suggest you read up on rational recovery as far as the addictive voice goes. Being able to discern the addictive voice in your head that wants you DEAD was a tremendous tool for me.

Some good advice here already Skywalker :)

A good recovery plan is vital, no matter what method you use or don't use, I think :)

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

I have been slacking on the gratitude :( I need to start on that again. Thank you

Wow some awesome suggestions! I will head over to Amazon now :)

Sober a bit over 2 years, only use SR and could not have done it without them :) I am somewhat of a person who "sticks to themselves" With SR I can speak when I want to be heard,
I can voice my opinion without fear of judgment. I can just "read" and not even post!

What ever works for you! This type of interaction works for me.

congrats airwick on 2 years!! I def can relate to why SR is a great alternative because I don't have the self consciousness to worry about. So glad to know that this site alone has worked for you!! Coming here and posting everyday is a commitment I am willing to make! Thank you for sharing :D

I have those moments where I have said that is it I am done but relapsed. But what went wrong is that I kept having false notions on what keeps you sober. A lot of people were telling me that there is no hope aside from AA hence when I didn't go to a meeting or just didn't feel comfortable at one I felt that something was wrong with me and there was no hope. It is good to know that there is not only ONE way. I think saying that there is only one way to stay sober is as detrimental as saying there is only one religion!!

We have an excellent Book List in our Sticky:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ependence.html

Can't thank you enough! This helps give me a whole new outlook on recovery :]

Was there any book in particular that helped you the most?

I am doing the crash course on AVRT now it's great!

Hi skywalker, I can't boast any kind of long-term sobriety -- I've got almost 6 months under my belt (though that's long to me!) -- but I did it without AA. I hated AA. I find several of the 12 steps offensive, especially the one that challenges an alcoholic's moral fiber. But that's just me; I know AA has helped many people. I went to a non 12 step inpatient rehab that was focused on the "3 Principles." One book I highly suggest is "The Serenity Principle....Finding Inner Peace In Recovery" by Joe Bailey. An excellent read. There's also a visualization technique I use when I'm having cravings. I "play the tape" from beginning to end if I'm tempted to have a drink. I know one drink won't be enough, so I'd have two. And then three. After that I'd probably say screw it and have the rest of the bottle. Then get in an argument with a family member. And on and on.... it really works!

I will check out that book thank you!

Thank you everyone for sharing it is really good to hear from those that have been sober with various alternative methods it shows that at the end of the day it is about an individual's willingness and if someone suggests to you there is no other way but their way it can do a lot of harm to the individual and society as a whole. Love you all!

The Seat of the Soul by Gary Zukav was the book that did it for me. Gary teaches us that we can connect with our inner self, our soul, so we can live the best life possible. I knew I was going to need more than just stopping drinking and this book gave me the direction I needed.