Class of May 2020 part 16
 

Last part:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...t-15-a-20.html

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Been a rough week nerve pain wise for me TC but hopefully out of the woods and better now 😁

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Oh Dee, I am so sorry to hear that. Sending you healing love. :hug: s xx

https://i.imgur.com/W9mcI5w.gif

Thanks Suze :)

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I hope you feel all better, Dee!
TC, I hope you finally had some rest.
Willow, have you thought about asking your family to skip a year? You would be perfectly within your rights to do that, in my opinion. Maybe you and your husband can go on a small trip right over the holiday.
I get that 'maybe just only on holidays, or special occasions, or whatever,' sometimes, too. But I have so much experience with failure, that it kind of is an asset to me now. I've had so many 'just this once' screw-ups. I have beat that poor horse to death. (That may not be a saying in other countries... I promise no animals were harmed in the creation of my addiction)
Not that all that try and fail makes me immune to the AV. It seems to know just how to make me believe the most preposterous lies. But, it does help. I think of all that when I think of a drink.
Anyway, today was very long and boring. Orientation. I'm doing pretty good.
I hope everyone is.

I hope the pain settles soon Dee :hug:

I would love to skip this Christmas at home, but it’s the last year of it, as we’re planning to sell the house next year once step daughter finishes school and leaves (school finishes in a couple of months and she’s moving out right after new year). So we’ll be downsizing next year and won’t have a pool anymore (too much work for the little use it gets). So it’s kind of a farewell house Christmas too 🤷‍♀️

But I’m not going to dwell too much on it, just make sure I have loads of n/a drinks available :)

That is what I would do too dear Willow ....and I like that you planned it all out now, as in early....no more worrying about Christmas ...just fun drink names and pretty glasses and stuff :)

Ahhhh Dee, sorry about the nerve pain. My wife will be yelping for sometimes three days with it (back surgery). I know that it can be tough and exhausting.
I hope you can get more rest.

Willow, your finale Christmas will be so nice and probably a bit emotional and melancholy. It sounds like it’ll be a really special time.
Might have to toss each other in the pool for a final hooraH. :yup:

Orientation day can be boring Karen. Glad that you are looking forward to it.

nmd, such a beautiful, sensational, autumn photo with the sunshine on the pumpkins. :Fall14:

I’m loving the weather.
Super grateful to be sober these days.

Be well friends.

I'm pretty much back to normal now but thanks TC :)
Hope your wife doesn't suffer from it too often.

Edit - thank to everyone else too - only just now had the chance to read back a bit.

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Great pumpkins nmd! :)

Karen I’m glad orientation went ok :)

I managed to get some more information from my siblings and hospital staff. Dad was drinking very heavily starting at noon or even earlier. I had no idea how bad it got because I haven't seen him in 4 years and was never invited or allowed to visit. Apparently, he was drinking like this daily since mom died 3 years ago which explains why I was frozen out.

Alcohol is indeed cunning and baffling. Dad was frustrated with my mom's drinking for years. Mom would pressure him to drink with her and my dad often refused and would leave the room to work on his hobby. He had never had a drink before he met my mom as medical students. With my struggles with alcohol and my mom drinking herself to death, I am very surprised my dad became an alcoholic this late in life.

Hope everyone is doing well! Thanks for letting me vent!

I have faith that your dad can heal dear WL :hug: s

WL, the struggles with alcohol that affected you both might be the common ground that leads to a deeper relationship.
One day at a time. Give the man a big hug when you get the chance.

My day was balanced and normal. I’m not worried about a thousand things at once.
I can entirely accept life as it is, today.
I credit the meds; might be something greater. Who knows.

Today was good, and for that, I am abundantly grateful.

Have a really good thing friends. :wavey:

Sending hugs, WL. It's a lot to process. I'm praying for your dad and for you.
My grandmother didn't drink for most of her life, and my grandfather was an alcoholic. He was really terrible, always drunk, gone for days to who knows where. She had eight children during the depression and wasn't able to keep them all fed. But she held up and did her best, until my grandfather got sober in AA, met a new woman and left her. Then, she started drinking, got super sick from it and died a few years later. Such a tragedy for all those kids, and for her, of course. It's a terrible disease, to be sure.
TC, it's good to hear you're having peace and serenity. It's a big difference from a few weeks ago when you were so sick in body and spirit.
I'm enjoying my day off. I go back tomorrow. I think I'll love this job. I got to meet my residents yesterday. I'll be working in memory care, but at Arbor they divide the residents into two neighborhoods for memory care. One is the severely impaired and one is the less severe. I'll be in the less severe, which I prefer a lot. They are such a fun group.
Have a great sober day everyone, and enjoy the weekend!

That is awesome Karen, re your job. I am very happy for you. :) :hug:

Such an interesting and tragic story about your grandparents Karen.
i’ve shared here about a family; A mom, dad, and four boys (two of which I hung out with) wiped off the map due to alcoholism.
AA would’ve been much less prevalent back in the days of your grandfather, I would think.
Your job sounds like it will be very rewarding. Way to go!!

I have a counselling appt. this morning, and then, a service appointment for my in-truck breathalyzer this afternoon.
It costs me $88 per month plus tax, so about $93.00 over a five year term. This appointment marks two years of having it.
The unit is really not a bother when it works well. When it doesn’t, the stress of it will make you cry, or give you chest pains, or both. :gaah I’m grateful to have it, tough, it gives me the freedom to get around.

Have a decent, sound, day all.

My new (old) truck.

https://i.postimg.cc/NfgGH7Jh/075-EC...-E0-DCC4-C.jpg

I’ve got it bad for this vehicle. :lmao
I’ve changed every fluid, even siphoned out the brake and steering fluids and replaced with new. Place all new tires on it (load rated). I’ve polished and shined. I’ve tinted the rear glass. Put side window visors on it. (my bumper treatment left streaks, but, once aged a few months, I can remedy this)

I, actually, bought this from our vehicle insurer, fixed it up some and voila! (Rear drivers corner and bumper was crumpled) I spent a day tapping out the body with body tools. Replaced the bumper,etc. Had an inspection. Passed.

The best thing, and reason I post, is that it gives me esteem.

I was told, years ago, in a lifeskills course that your vehicle should be something that gives you esteem.

This one is nearly 28 years old. Has only 86 250 miles (138 000 km).
Hopefully it will run well and last. It could be a very good camper hauler. Yay!

Be well folks.

I think it will still be running after we are not dear TC :) :) :hug: s xx

Hahaha! Yeah, maybe you’re right! :lmao

Too funny.!

Hope your day is good.

It is not :)
But I will survive..... ❤️

Suze, sending you a huge hug, I hope your day gets better :hug: ❤️ xxx

WL I hope your Dad can get better and sober and that you and your Dad have a chance to mend your relationship :hug:

TC you sound like you’re in much more positive place at the moment, I’m happy for you :) And that is a very cool truck! I love old vehicles. I sometimes wish I’d kept my first car, a 1972 Holden torana. Boy I loved that car, sigh. They’re worth a fortune now (done up as original).

Karen I’m so glad you feel so happy about your job :) :) :)
And what a sad story about your grandparents. Apparently my paternal grandparents were big socialites and owned hotels, until they drank it all away and lost everything. Their 5 kids were placed in various foster homes (including my Dad) so I never knew them. It was a very sad situation and my Dad had a really rough upbringing :(

nmd I was wondering how you get your pumpkins so big. Do you give them super dooper fertiliser?

Today we’re going to pick up an antique wardrobe for our bush cabin. I haven’t seen it yet, but my partner found it in an old auction house and bought it a couple of weeks ago. I’m very excited! I love old things (old cars, old houses, old furniture etc).

Sending you all love and support :grouphug:

Willow, I looked up the torana. Nice! Would’ve been a great car. Looks like our ventura or chevy nova.
You’re not kidding about the value of those. Wow! Well into 6 figures for some of them. :c006:

I like Holden. They must be subsidiary to General Motors. The newer holden ute (2006-2010 ish) looks, at the front, very much like our pontiac cars. The ute was never sold here. I’d like one, but must not be licensable here. I’ve never seen one.
My counsellor, yesterday, encouraged me to embrace all the things that I used to enjoy. She said ‘recovery’ means we are hoping to get some parts of ourselves back.
Cars, outdoors, riding motorcycles, fishing/camping, little fix ups (wood or other), laughing with family. These are some of the things I’d like to get back to. I miss my late father’s laugh and smile.

Suze, I hope today will be a good one, 1000% better than yesterday. :happysad:

Have a good, relaxed, weekend day all.

:biggthump

I didn’t mention: It is exceedingly rare to find an older vehicle here that is rust free. For 5-6 months each year our roadways are coated with a layer of salt and sand. All of the intersections are treated with this mix, sometimes twice or more daily. This stuff EATS your car.
I see some trucks that are 6-10 years old that are rusting through in the wheel wells.

Anyway, back to sobriety….so glad that the skies have brightened. I’m excited to enjoy things again.
25 days sober. I think back to the darkness and depression I was feeling. At one point I rolled over in bed and wondered (loosely a prayer) God, can a person will themselves to die? Feeling hopeless.
Honestly friends, hopelessness must be the worst. It is for me, I know.

Embrace your sobriety today. Do something special.
I might take the dogs for a walk along the river. We haven’t done that in a long while.

Much love folks. Take care.

GMH....General Motors Holden. My dad. 50 years. :)
Not a subsidiary, GM made Holdens in Aus.

And I do believe a person can will themselves to die and I am glad you did not dear TC :) :hug: s

...sorry....in the middle of something..... thank you for the wish for a better day and woo hoo!!! 25 days is wonderful ❤️

Cool that your dad worked at GMH venus.
Nothing better than the rumble of an old GM.

Dog walk, then a nap, I think.

Cheers.

I LOVE cars TC....can talk cars for hours. Would love to help you work on one. I miss that. :)
I have so many stories for you.....

Have a nice walk :) xx

Hi everyone!
Venus, what's up? I'm sorry you were having a bad day. Don't forget to lean on your besties, here! I hope today was so much better.
I love old stuff, too, Willow. Your grandparents have a sad story, too. And their children. So sad how the kids always get hurt, too.
TC, I love your truck! It's amazing how you've kept it alive and running well. I'm really not a car person. It's frustrating to me when I'm asked the make and model of my car and I can never remember. People look at me like I must be nuts.
I'm going to be really focused on my health, because I have almost, but not quite enough energy for this job. Today, Greg said he knew we had agreed on four days a week, but he may have to schedule me for five. I honestly don't think I can do that, and I don't want to. It's all good, I will explain it to him. I'm glad he's not a stranger to me or I would be scared as heck to have that conversation.
As it is, I get too tired too early. But most of the day goes great. I am going to love my group, they are such characters.

Great posts TC :)
I love what your counsellor says about recovery, and getting back the bits of ourselves and our lives that we loved. I think it’s important to have projects.

Karen I love old things, of all sorts. I just remembered I had already mentioned getting old stuff when your post popped up just now :). We went and bought some antique furniture from an auction house yesterday and it will need cleaning up, maybe sanding, oiling etc. We also have some stuff from previous buys. Old English oak. Beautiful :)

Like you guys Suze & TC I also love old cars.
My first 3 cars were Holdens. I had 2 different toranas and a gemini. I loved them all :)

And I hear you about the salt TC. We live near the coast and everything rusts, but if there was salt on the roads that would be so much worse. We have a few old rust buckets in my partner’s shed that we’re doing up (a valiant charger, a Toyota Land Cruiser and a VW van), but getting rid of the rust is a major mission. My partner and a mate have done some of the rust repairs, and we have another guy doing some work (sandblasting etc) at another commercial yard (it’s an expensive undertaking…). I haven’t been doing much myself except strip them down before the rust work, and then I’ll put one of them (mine, can you guess which one? :) ) back together. Still looking into interior trim, colours, designs etc. I will probably need help from an upholsterer for some of it, but plan to do as much myself as possible.

Last night we went out for dinner as a family (haven’t done that in ages, it was really nice). Partner, stepdaughter and myself. Today I will do some garden watering and raking of endless leaves, maybe go for a nice long walk on the beach. Things in the great outdoors that makes me feel good. All part of recovery :)

Karen I totally hear you about not wanting to do the extra day! I only work 3 days at my regular job, but sometimes do extra when people are away ( at the moment 5 days a week). My boss recently asked me about going full time and I said no. I know it would be too much for me at the moment and I don’t want to. I have worked full time pretty much all my life since I finished school and I’m over it. I get too tired these days. On work days I come home exhausted. And I still have to do the washing, change sheets, cook everyone dinner, water gardens, feed animals, clean the pool, rake leaves, put the rubbish out, do grocery shopping etc. Thank goodness we finally got someone to clean the house once a fortnight! I was doing that too. No wonder I’m so tired all the time lol 😂

I'm thinking that when I move back home this December, since I'll be in a house so full of family, that I'll try and get someone in once a fortnight, too. The cleaning is really a lot there, and when it gets messy, it gets really messy! I'll bet it's well worth the expense, especially since I'm going to have plenty of work. It sounds like a wonderful idea for lots of reasons.
Your day sounds wonderful, Willow.
We're celebrating my son's birthday today. He's turning 40. I have to go get him something, I have no idea what. I want to spend some time outdoors this weekend, too. It's so good for us.