Hiya guys :wavey:

Catching up on posts.

Leshar, my dear,darling friend. I love you . It hurts me to know you are still pained. The comments i have read from our Julyers are nothing short of remarkable. We all care so deeply for each other here. There is such good advice to be taken from everyones perspective, they are all in sync with their answers.

Its so hard to take advice , but what would you do if you were sitting behind your psychiatry desk ? How would you treat YOU. A lot better than you are treating yourself now i assume.

We all know drinking isnt gonna do Jackshite. Get that first and foremost out of your head. Its irrational thinking and you know it.

God knows i know it. Im only 5 months sober and its a lot fresher to me than your 4 sober years.
Its non picnic. Its vile , its tainted with vomiting, hangovers from hell. We are not talking about 1 or 2 day hangovers as we get older. Try 2 to 3 days and beyond. Hideous. The worst hangovers ive had in my life the ladt time i relapsed. Its ugly. Your face and body will bloat and you will feel like hell 24/7.

Then the worst part...the black depression you had in your 40s and 50s .... time that by a gazillion. You can barely recover once you take that step.

I know you wont drink , but im asking you to take time out today to remember. Just sit and be.

Remember everytime you put yourself in danger , every time you got sick . For me it was every day.

But the really really scary part for me was the quanity i started to need , to get the same feelings i once got after a couple of glasses.

Rhat will NEVER happen again as i actually got to a 3rd bottle and realise i will NEVER get that true buzz again ever.

I never really felt completely drunk but i knew after those 3 bottles i was gonna pay for it and some, the next day.

Did i ever.

I actually feel like i could be sick now just writing this. That taste of stale wine ugh....enough.

Anyhow my darling one, its not a lecture ....hmmmm well maybe it is lol.
I love you so much and you have helped me through so many terrible moments in my life, i just want you to know im here for you. We ALL are. Please post today lovely. You are missed xxx


Very missed xxx

Was imposing a small quiet time for myself, but your post touched my heart, Snoozy, my dear, dear one. What a great friend to Leshar you are....
I was so touched by your loving post to L, that I just had to reach out and say how inspiring you both are.
Leshar you are cherished beyond measure by your friends here. Please,
please, never forget that.

Dealing with the anniversary of my Son's death. Beyond sad
My love to all Julyers
Croutie

Oh Croutie ~ so much love sweetheart. :hug: ♥♥

I'm so sorry, Croutie. :hug:

(((Croutie)))

D

Thinking of you, Croutie.

Snooz, sending you love. I'm so happy every time I see how committed you are to your sobriety.

PRAYERS, CROUTIE- there could be nothing worse.

Thanks for letting us know, Dee!!!!!

((((((Croutie))))). There is absolutely nothing worse.

So much love to you, dear one, so much.

Hello and love to all.

Croutie, thinking of you :grouphug:

Sending my love Croutie x I'm sorry x

Sending my thoughts strength & heart to everyone today x

Getting into The Last Kingdom looks alright so far

Hi, SW!

I think if after 4 years, Leshar, you feel you can't connect and post with classmates, that is very sad.

Isolating from here is when I know I'm acting out my old drinking behaviours - someone makes me feel upset or like what Im saying is annoying them, so I don't post. That's a warning sign for me,

I know in early sobriety, it was reading advice I didn't want to hear, that would trigger me to cut people off in the beginning. Thankfully, if I don't post now, it's because I'm focused on something, or busy - not Withdrawing in a funk.

Although, Leshar I do know you are still reading the threads, so I will say, if I'm posting things you don't want to hear, arent we all familiar enough wth our disease now, and done our homework enough to know it's dangerous for us to be resentful and isolate? We all know that.

10 Warning Signs of Isolation for the Drug Addict or Alcoholic
- Increased anger and resentment
- Ignoring the signs of negative thinking and distorted thinking (“Stinkin’ thinkin’”)
- Intensified cravings
- Ceasing to engage in healthy, self-esteemable activities
- Returning to old concepts of self (“I am a waste”, “I am bad”, “What am I good for?”)
- Feeling lonely
- Keeping secrets
- Feeling overwhelmed and out of control
- Increased sense of boredom
- Blaming others for everything

https://www.recoveryconnection.com/i...-curse-addict/

I don't make this stuff up. These are the facts of our disease, so no, I'm not going to lie down and say nothing when classmates isolate (for bad reasons) and not post. I am going to look your addiction straight in the eye and say, no, you aren't taking another one down that road.

Hi 'ya, dear Soberwolf. :wave:

We love you, dear Leshar, but are scared out of our minds by your silence.

We need you; you need us.

Snooz, how is Ange going? I did worry when we hadn't heard from you for a bit, that she may have gone downhill.

Bob, hope your wife is slowly on the mend.

:e044:

Goodnight, all.

See you tomorrow.

You weren't to know Crois but I removed a post from Leshar a couple of days back.

Why I did it and what it said really isn't pertinent

The fact is Leshar is posting, if intermittently, and she is reading and she is taking steps to take care of herself..

I think, most of all, what she needs from the Julyers is messages of support and empathy right now.

:grouphug:

D

OK. I might not post then if it's mentally unhinging people, I thought my posts were supportive, and about recognising denial and isolating are part of the disease. If my posts upset Leshar (or anyone else) and she can't put me on block, then I'm happy to find other outlets for recovery than .soberrecovery, all good.

As I said a few weeks ago, I'd looked for some other real life supports, so maybe it is time to move on, as I mentioned previously, I too have a disability - Aspergers, so yes, I probably have a skewed way of showing "Support and empathy" as you put it, Dee. So if my communication skills upset people, I can only help that by being with people who know my intentions are good. There's only so many times I should have to apologise for my disability, and this is the final time I'm willing to do that.

All the best.