Class of July 2016 Support Thread Part 5
 

last part here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-4-a-20.html

D

AHH, you got me Dee. I was just posting a reply and got the message that the thread was closed, LOL!

Sorry - but I have to go to bed sometime Optimist :)
Night all :)

D

Sweet dreams :-)

Viperidae, you did the right thing and you're doing a great job. Just remember, your family had been living with a drinking you for how long? They probably don't know how to interact with a sober you. Give them time, but remember, you're doing this for you!

And super job on clearing out the loft!

Getting ready to start my day, working from home.

My meeting went well last night. Thanks JL for reminding me that I had to give my "stuff" to my Higher Power. I felt better immediately!

The director of the recovery group gives a message each meeting. He's a little rough around the edges and has said some things in the past that made me cringe but last night took the cake. I walked out on him.

For whatever reason, he made 3 racist remarks in a row hitting 3 different cultures. The first comment, I said out loud "Stop now" but since I sit in the back and run the sound and visuals, he didn't hear me, but the 3 people with me did hear me. He continued his "joking" with 2 more comments and I was out of there. If he had been in any job setting in the US, he would have been fired for what he said.

When this group started out, it was very small, so his comments didn't affect too many people. Most of the original members were bikers, street people, ect. and could handle that type of talk. Now we have 75-100 people showing up each week. Moms, dad, grandmothers, teenagers are all there and he's failed to recognize that his street talk is not really appropriate now.

So, I talked to him afterwards. He's sort of prideful and really tried to justify his comments. He realized he was off base when I told him that if this was the first meeting I ever attended, I would not be returning. Hopefully he'll give this some thought and figure out a safer way to approach us.

Well, back to work! Will check in later class :-)

Optimist, that is just ridiculous about the racist remarks, it gets my blood boiling.!

Oswin, SFL, must be so hard when spouses still drinking.

I still am infuriated about mine being laid off and not telling me. He is not a good interviewee and seems to think he has enough in 401k for life. That's absurd and delusional , we have a mortgage and live in an expensive area. Maybe enough to live in a cave and eat mice with our cats until age 85.

Trying to control emotions for now and then see what to do. I will not tolerate him sitting around playing games and expecting me to be breadwinner, housekeeper, etc.

Viper 50 days hoooray!

Optimist,
I know where pride will take me. I hope it doesn't take him there.
Don't you let his junk put you anywhere either.

Congrats Viper !

I'm not surprised you are stressed, the fact he kept it from you is bad enough. Try not to let it stress you out. I know easier said than done. Tell him your not prepared to be the main breadwinner and he needs to get out there and find a new job. I know jobs aren't that easy to find but he at least has to be proactive in finding one.

Congrats on 50 days Viper!

Woke up dreaming about cueing up to buy alcohol this morning. My Dad was there with me (which would be right, he's an alco), and loads of other very unattractive people. It was a dark street and I was all alone. Pretty weird. The stuff is still messing with my head.

I went to my counselor again yesterday. He's helping me draw up plans to get the rest of my life together so I don't fall back in the trap. I didn't realise how much difference having a person who specialises in drug and alchol rehab on your team makes. It's no wonder it was so difficult all the other times. I really feel gifted to have ended up with such a great, knowledgeable, supportive person to help me out. Especially considering how isolated I am geographically.

Anyhow, I hope you all have a great day/night. Need to get on with my work now.

What an awful dream Forester. It's great that you have a counselor who is so supportive. I've been wanting to do that, too. I need help sorting everything out. I'll look into it.
I feel for you Penny! Is he trying to make light of it to make you feel better? I wonder if he's deep down very concerned and just doesn't want to admit it?
Dog has to go out. See you all later!

Oh, he and I have had run-ins before about his mouth. I don't let him get away with much...

Thanks JL!

Congrats Viper :)

I'm sorry you had that experience Optimist. That's incredibly unprofessional and personally it would make my blood boil, so I'm really impressed at how you calmly had it out with him. Good stuff :)

D.

Forester, alcohol does take us to dark, scary places, doesn't it? Thank goodness it was only a dream...

Penny...:grouphug:
Just know we're here if you need us...

Well, I made it through another day. My allergies are really bad and it's wearing me down. I think I'll make a cup of tea, put on my pj's and get ready for bed.

Talk to you tomorrow :-)

Anyone hear from Cute? Hope he's doing ok...

Wife's brother in hospital acute renal failure. Not finding cause as of yet. May be high BP did damage. It's bad. He's younger than me, maybe 43-44.
I'm having a hard time focusing on evening meditation ( just started a week ago).
Jangled up a bit.
Thy will be done, higher power.
Gnite friends

Prayers for your BIL, JL - and for you and your family.

I'm here n sober :). Thanks for checking on me Optimist :-) I've been reading just haven't posted :). Weekend trip this weekend. So I'll be away from the site. Hope your wife's brother is ok JL.

Thanks y'all.
A job opp presented itself, yesterday. My wife's all over me wanting me to do it, because her younger brother works there. I don't know what to do at ALL. It's .65 less an hr, but there's no chance of doing the things that I hate, here. ( flagging traffic, shovelling asphalt). It's "buildings and grounds", for a wealthy private neighborhood.
It's a little closer- in our county, but I've got the best job benefits I'll have where I'm at.
I don't know what to do. NO peace about with way.

When I'm in doubt I write out the pros and cons...if that doesn't cut it, then I pray JL :)

D

That's a tough spot to be in, especially in regards to your benefits. I think in times like these your gut will always lead you in the right direction. It may take a few days but you will eventually know what to do. Don't let anyone else choose something like this for you. Prayers for your BIL. That must be so hard for your wife. I hope he can recover with ease.

Nice you have choices JL! I hate making decisions like that, too. One way to help, besides, of course, praying about it and trying to listen for an answer, is making a page with two columns and listing the pros and cons of each job. It can help sort your ideas. Prayer and talking about it with others is tops, though. I hope your brother-in-law gets well soon. My mother had renal failure from untreated blood pressure problems. That was many years ago, medicine is better now. I'll pray for him.
Optimist, I loved how you handled the situation with your group leader. He needs to know better. Sounds like an idiot, but maybe he's only stupid in that one regard, and is wise with recovery issues. I hope so. Kudos to you for having the courage to stand up to him!
I saw another Youtube program that I want to share. It's about relapse prevention. I got a lot out of it and hope you all do too! Here is the link:
I don't know if that will work. But, If you just look up Addiction Relapse Prevention, it's on there.
Have a happy sober day everyone!

Thanks for checking in Cute, glad you're doing well. I wrote down all the people that have posted from the beginning of our thread and saw that some are still posting, but others not. Stay strong, all!

JL, I'm so sorry about your brother-in-law. I'll pray for him. About the job, Dee gave good advice. Hope you come to a decision that gives you peace.

I'm still feeling way horrible with these allergies. I woke with a headach and feel as if a cold is coming on, but it just stays at that stage. I would love to stay home today and just relax...I think I just talked myself into it. Just absolutely no energy at all and still having trouble breathing.

I'm having wierd dreams again, but then again I always did. Last night was an eating dream, LOL. Better than a drinking dream I guess. And then I had a dream about weddings...multiple weddings occurring batch after batch. No, I wasn't a bride, but I was late to the wedding I was invited to, which is funny because I'm a very prompt person....

Anyway, I will check in later to see how everyone is doing!

Ok, going to settle in to my routine and get some work done. Meetings start in less than an hour so I better have my awake voic

What are your weekend plans?

I'd love to know if you have anything fun planned. Friday evening, nothing. I may see if my youngest grandson would like to go out to dinner with me. I naven't seen him in about a week and I miss him. Hopefully, I'll feel well enough to go see my granddaughters play in a soccer tournament on Saturday. The youngest one (9) hurt her foot last week so it's not likely she'll be playing but I just love hanging out with them! Sunday, our church is having a baptism (like over 100 people getting baptized) and I was invited by a few of the women in our recovery grouop to be there, so, that's where I'll be Sunday. I have Monday off and I've got a huge list of things to get done around here before the fall/winter so I'll do that. How abour you?

Hi friends! Just checking in. Wild week at work. Remember when i said i used to deink because i was stressed? Well i guess i didnt know what stress was :) oh well. Put myself to be at 10pm last night so feeling great and ready to conquer. Day 31 ;) need to stop appeasing my AV with frostys (ice cream) but maybe i can go for walks when it cools down. Love you all. Hugs

Checking in on day 33. :-)

Another night of bad dreams. It's funny that they would all come consecutively like this. I guess my brain is just purging it's junk.

TGIF everybody! Have a great day.

Hi all! My weekend plan is to clean on Saturday and go to work on Sunday. I'm going to a meeting on Saturday, too. So, not really anything fun planned. I work too much!
I hope you're feeling better Optimist.
It's still Thursday where I am. Fridays are a very busy day for me. The last thing of the day is to serve a wine and cheese party for the residents. That's tough for me. I'm going to try to call my sponsor right before and right after. That will help.
Happy sober night to all!

Day 30

Got kids. Wife's gone to hospital to see brother. They think his BP meds have damaged his kidneys. About it so far.
Job opp wasn't a good choice. Just my crazy alcoholic mind jumbling things up.
Super busy, and falling down tired.. More later if awake

I had bad dreams every time I quit drinking. No more I hope.
Kids in the bed, one w me til mom gets home. Soooo sore from work today. Ibuprofen evening !
No big plans for weekend. I'm off though. I can smell the Doritos and ice cream already !!
I'm sure type of comfort food will present itself.
Had a good talk with my sponsor this evening.
Gnite