Class of August 2014 Part 15
 

last part here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-14-a-20.html
D

Thanks, Dee!

Thanks dee, very fitting that we start thread 15 at the start of 2015!

As always, inspirational D thanks,
and I don't think any of us can thank-you enough for just putting in the considerate, and thoughtful time that you do. I feel like you genuinely care about everyone on here, and we are all really lucky that we have you.
From team a quadruple shout out for sure man..:c011:
thanks for more than words can say (and in this case it's not a cliché cause it is exactly how it should be said from my end!)

Thanks for the kind words guys :)

D

Thanks for the kind words guys :)

D

Does this journey get easier? I got into a dots with my husband tonight. He wanted to go out to a local bar but I didn't want to. He is angry that I don't want to out bc he knows that I am avoiding it bc I can't control my drinking. He says he wants to go out to go dancing. I told him that I really don't get anything out of going and sitting and bars. He said we don't have any fun and we aren't meeting anyone in our new city. I told him that I wanted to find other ways to have fun and want to find other ways to meet people. He asked why we can't compromise. I asked him if he even noticed how good I've been doing. I really wish he was on the same page as me.

I think it's hard for a couple to adjust, Rah - it may take a little while.

I know my family didn't understand why I couldn't just have a few, but they did start to see the happiness in me and they responded to that.

I'm sure your husband loves you, and he'll respond to the happiness in you too :)

D

Hey guys + girls

I am checking in at 7am Saturday morning. I hope waking up feeling fresh and alert NEVER gets boring! It's one of the most simple but most powerful things of recovery for me.

Hoping everyone is good, it's a real bonus New Year was close to a weekend.

Today I am heading to AA and then the gym. I wonder if AA might be a little busier today after the holidays? Maybe I can reach out to someone.

Tonight I am heading to a girl friends place and we are having a movie sleepover! Ha ha, I am 35 years old but can't wait! Her flat mate is away so we are going to watch a load of Disney and cook up a big chicken dinner. No ice cream for me as I am taking out some carbs for a while.

Have a safe and sober Saturday everyone.

Thanks for the new thread Dee. Yes pink, it's a sign! 15 at the start of 2015.

Rah - I am sure it's going to get easier. I am sure he will come to see how well you are doing. Some things take some time.

You know you said you liked the lists that some of us made at New Years on what had changed? Could you make one, you don't have to post it, but share some of it with your OH? Why this is so important to you and what an alternative drinking life might lead to? What things used to be like?

Dancing is part of your posts often and I think your OH likes it? Do you enjoy dancing as well? Maybe there is something in that. Somewhere you could go together, but take the focus off drinking to do so? A compromise maybe? :-)

Keep going Rah - we're all in your corner!

Pink and Dee - there is a great article on BBC news website on lego being washed up on beaches around Cornwall after a container spill in 1997 and a map etc. I may have to add "go beach combing" to my 2015 bucket list!

Rah - someone is building a great thread called "how do you have fun" on the newcomers page on SR too. May be worth a read..,

Good morning,

Rah, could you compromise and go dancing once a week and to a seminar or exhibit or coffee house another night? Have you thought of joining the Y or another gym together? volunteering at a senior place or library or thrift shop or food bank?

London, I don't know about AA, but I can guarantee the gym will be packed! My Y is always crowded the first three or four weeks of the new year with people who have resolved to start exercising. The vast majority are long gone by February 1.

I am starting to feel the anxiety lightening up FINALLY since my brother texted that things are okay. I am also feeling very pleased with myself when thinking of what I accomplished in 2014. I not only stopped drinking, I upped my exercise,started walk/jogging and even with eating way too many chocolates and other sweets, I managed to lose 18 pounds. This year, starting tomorrow, I plan to cut way back on the sugar, try two new exercises and lose 13 pounds.

I am going to make a cranberry pie for the Open House today because the couple having it are the ones I went cranberry picking with back in the Fall. I froze the cranberries in two cup containers. I think they will be pleased to get the pie. I am bringing vanilla ice cream from a local shop to go with the pie. That will hopefully be my last sweet for at least a week.

I am off to fight the crowds at the Y ! Have a happy, safe and sober day everyone.

I agree with London, this waking up thing is off the chart fantastic! How much free time in the morning to plan the day instead of regret the prior!

Rah, simply stick this out. If you go back to drinking you will hate yourself and be less fun and likely let your frustration build to an explosion of stellar proportion. I think scooters suggestion of a gym is great. You can play tennis, racquetball, swim, whatever. Guess what, many of the same people at bars go to gyms too. The only ones that don't are likely problem drinkers. Not the best long term friend choices either.

Take a second or two to give yourself credit for making it through the toughest part of the year sober! Holy freakin moly!! I thought of work on Monday and got some anxiety for a moment. Then I checked myself and said, wait, turn that frown upside down dude!! You are sooooo on your game. You would be looking terrible, full of guilt, sweating, shaking and virtually useless. We never have to feel that way again!!! No five minute rip off of a buzz is worth going back there. Celebrate life. Enjoy every sandwich! Thanks dee for that one.

I envy me!

Revel in your sobriety but carry a big stick behind your back for the AV. It plays dead sometimes, don't forget that.

Off to the gym.

Hipster cool daddy o.

Hey guys!
London your sleep over sounds great fun, hope you have a lovely time!
Rah, hope your ok, you're doing so well despite your obstacles please don't give up hun xxx
Very busy weekend for me, so only a quickie but I am here and dry and thinking of you all xxx
Much love xxx

Checking in! Out with the hubby watching the Panthers play the playoff game. Very challenging not ordering a beer. So far so good, drinking diet soda and seltzer. Having a good time. Table next to me pulled a ghost save...table full of guys and one girl, none drinking. Thanks for the save!

Rah amazing ghost save story! Well done on getting through tonight girl! Xxx

Well played rah!! Awesome!

Rah that's brilliant! Well done you. Love ghost saves

Had a great evening watching films and great food. Films have finished up just now and it's 01:30!! So waaay past bedtime in London!

Check in tomorrow. I want to get to AA and the gym and plan and research some trips on the web, one of my favourite pass-times. I am also going to jump on the scales post holiday, I have a feeling I have lost some weight with the running so fingers crossed. Not a huge amount to drop, but I would like to take 14 pounds off over the next couple of months. I know I look in better shape at that weight.

Scooter - the Y gym was quiet. But London is still filling up after the holidays as many people have relatives away from the City. I expect it to be rammed from Monday through to February. You are right, it is great and sociable place.

Oh, if anyone is a Doctor Who fan (like me) I had a chat with one of the previous actors on the bus today!! She was lovely and seemed genuinely pleased I chatted to her about her work. Clue - mother of David Tennants last Assistant. Made my day! And that's definitely a good start to "speak to someone I don't know each day" goal.

When I go out with my husband I find it to be very challenging. Based on my previous posts you all know that he still drinks, still enjoys going to bars, and is trying to use the bar scene to meet new people in our new city. I find it to be challenging because I really do like beer and the relaxation I feel when I have a few drinks. Since I can't drink responsibly I must abstain completely. My husband doesn't understand why I can't moderate. I don't understand either. Today when we were out I was watching people drinking. I am 5'3 and weigh 160 pounds. I watched girls much smaller than me knock down 3 to 4 tall boys. They seemed fine. I guess my metabolism has really changed since the gastric bypass. Anyway when I am faced with temptation I think about a few things: that I don't want to be hungover, that I don't want to not remember where I've been and what I've done, that I don't want to embarrass myself, that I want to be in tune with my body and not distracted by aches and pains from drinking or hurting myself. There are plenty of good reasons for me not to drink and still I am so tempted.

My husband and I are on different pages right now. For example, I am home now with my dogs sitting on the couch watching football. My husband went back out to bar hop. I do several things to try and help my husband with the transition to Charlotte and retirement. We have season tickets for the Hornets so some weeks we go to 3 basketball games. We go out and watch football at local restaurants/bars. We go out to eat several times a week. In warmer weather there are plenty of venues that offer live music like at local parks. It irritates me that he is so hung up on me and him going out dancing and listening to live music at local bars. I like being active but am not interested in staying up until 1 or 2 in the morning. I still feel so tired. I feel like I am still trying to catch up on rest and sleep. I understand that it is hard moving to a new city. I just think my husband has to find other ways to establish a community. I think he could get a part time job or volunteer or join a bowling league. Making contacts and new friends doesn't haven't to put me into a compromising position. He and I have talked about this but things haven't progressed. I hope things change soon.

Today is 63! 1 slip/98 days!!