Effin I hated when I felt like that too and yeah your right this isnt going to be overnight and everythings better but what it is, is you havnt done none of this bad stuff today & I commend you for that so yes it will take time but its better than jumping into the abyss and as time goes on and seasons change, people change
I can provide my own personal example
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-hated-me.html